Central Services
We do the work, you do the pleasure
Hi, there. I want to talk to you about ducts.
Do your ducts seem old-fashioned…
out-of-date?
Central Services' new duct designs…
are now available in hundreds of different colors…
to suit your individual taste.
Hurry now, while stocks last, to your nearest Central Services showroom.
Designer colors to suit your demanding taste.
We have here from the Ministry of Information…
Deputy Minister Eugene Helpmann.
Good evening, David.
What d'you believe is behind this recent increase in terrorist bombings?
Bad sportsmanship.
A ruthless minority of people…
seems to have forgotten certain good old-fashioned virtues.
They just can't stand seeing the other fellow win.
If these people would just play the game…
they'd get a lot more out of life.
Nevertheless, there are those who maintain…
that the Ministry of Information has become too large and unwieldy.
In free society, information is the name of the game.
You can't win the game if you're a man short.
The cost of it all, seven percent of the gross national product.
I understand this concern on behalf of the taxpayers.
People want value for money. That is why we always insist…
on the principle of Information Retrieval Charges.
It's absolutely right and fair…
that those found guilty should pay for their periods of detention…
and for the information retrieval procedures used in their interrogation.
Do you believe the government is winning against terrorists?
Oh, yes.
We're fielding all their strokes, running all of them out…
and pretty consistently knocking them for six.
I'd say they're nearly out of the game.
…have to subsidize.
Mr. Helpmann, the bombing campaign is now in its thirteenth year.
Beginner's luck.
Thank you very much, Deputy Minister.
Thank you, David. And a very merry Christmas to you all.
"Scrooge was better than his word.
"He did it all, and infinitely more.
"And to Tiny Tim, who did not die…
"he became a second father.
"He became as good a friend, in the good old world.
"And so, as Tiny Tim observed…
"God bless us, everyone."
Are you boys giving me the runaround?
Now, I have to say, "Hey, hey."
Don't throw that. That's only for long distance.
- I'm sorry, we haven't any vacancies. - No vacancies?
We've got plenty of rooms…
Who's there?
Who is that?
Father Christmas can't come if we haven't got a chimney.
You'll see.
"I hereby inform you, under powers entrusted to me…
"under Section 47, Paragraph 7 of Council Order Number 438476…
"that Mr. Buttle, Archibald, residing in 412 North Tower, Shangri-La Towers…
"is invited to assist the Ministry of Information with inquiries.
"And that he is liable to financial obligations as specified in…
"Council Order RB/CZ/907/X."
Sign here, please.
Where are you taking him?
There.
Thank you.
Same again, please.
Press harder this time. Good.
What is this all about?
That is your receipt for your husband. Thank you.
This is my receipt for your receipt.
Mrs. Buttle, are you okay?
We're Department of Works! Department of Works up here.
- Careful with those bloody things. - Sure.
Don't take any notice of them.
Don't touch me! Why don't you just get out of here.
Don't you worry. We'll have everything shipshape in a jiffy.
Nothing to worry about.
It's Tuttle downstairs who can worry.
Tuttle? His name's Buttle. There must be some mistake.
Mistake? We don't make mistakes.
Bloody typical. They've gone back to metric without telling us.
Mrs. Buttle, are you all right?
Yes…
Buttle.
Buttle, Archibald.
Oh, shit!
Mister…
Mr. Lowry, would you step in here, please.
Has anybody seen Lowry?
Has anybody seen…
Sam Lowry?
Sam.
Hello? Sam. Where are you?
- Hello? - It's 11:00.
- What? - It's 11:00.
Mr. Kurtzmann.
You're up late.
Is it?
- The electrics here are up the spout. - Yeah, I know.
- Yours, too? - Yes.
I'll be there as soon as I can. Yes, thanks. 'Bye.
This is not the only statue.
What's this gun for?
This one, Sister, is a nine millimeter submachine gun…
used for close-quarter combat fighting. Very effective weapon.
Would you like to see it?
Sam!
Jack!
Long time no see.
What are you doing here?
Didn't expect to see you slumming it in Records.
- What's the problem? - Problem? No problem.
Everything's fine. Marvelous.
Alison's in great shape, kids are fine. I'm on Security Level 5…
so Mr. Helpmann relies on me more and more. It's been a great year.
You sound worried.
Worried? Me? If I'm worried about anyone, Sam, it's you.
Sam, whatever happened to you?
Records…
Sam?
Jack, it's great to see you. I'm going to be late.
Sam, let a friend tell you your life is going wrong.
Records is a dead-end department. No security that's worth a damn.
- It's impossible to get noticed. - I know. Wonderful.
Marvelous. Perfect.
See you, Jack. Give my regards to Alison and the twins.
- Triplets. - Triplets?
God, how time flies.
A very clear delineation of picture, is it not? Mobile.
Next!
I want to report a wrongful arrest.
You want Information Adjustments. Different department.
I've been to Information Adjustments. They sent me here.
They said you have a form I need to fill out.
- Have you got an arrest receipt? - Yeah.
Is it stamped?
Stamped?
No, there's no stamp on it, you see.
I can't let you have the form until this is stamped.
Where do I get it stamped?
Information Adjustments.
It's nothing.
It keeps picking up old films. That can't be right, can it?
Perhaps the machine's on the blink.
It's not the machine. There's a mismatch on the personnel code numbers.
Tuttle should've had L31.06 debited against his account, not Buttle.
- My God, a mistake! - At least it's not ours.
Isn't it? Whose is it?
- Information Retrieval. - Good.
Expediting has put in for electrical procedures in respect of…
Buttle, Archibald, shoe-repair operative.
But Security has invoiced Admin. for Tuttle, Archibald, heating engineer.
What a relief. Well, finish your tea, Sam.
Thanks.
I don't know what I'd do if you ever got promoted.
- God, don't worry about that. - But if they did promote you…
I've told you before. I'd turn it down.
- Would you, really? - Really.
You've been promoted.
It's your mother, isn't it? Pulling strings again.
Sam, it's time for you to grow up and accept responsibility.
Your poor father would be appalled at your lack of promotion.
Mother, I just wish you would stop interfering.
I don't want promotion. I'm happy where I am.
No, you're not. Jack Lint is a lesson to you.
He doesn't have your brains, but he's got the ambition.
You haven't got the ambition. Luckily, you've got me and the Deputy Minister.
Mr. Helpmann was very close to your father.
Now please, Mrs. Lowry. Don't get upset.
Mr. Lowry, please wait in the reception. You're giving her wrinkles.
- You see? - God!
Just try and relax, Mrs. Lowry.
I'll make you 20 years younger.
Dr. Jaffe, you are a genius.
Would you like to be Surgeon General?
I know simply everybody.
They won't know you when I've finished with you.
First…
we remove the excess derma.
Now the flaccid tissues under the eyes and forehead.
Now, I lift…
the wrinkles and the worry lines…
right up into the wig, into the hairline.
Now the template.
Now, a bit of sticky. Comme ça!
Already she's twice as beautiful as she was before.
Voila!
Mr. Helpmann was very close to your poor father.
He was close to me. He still is.
He'll take you under his wing when you get to Information Retrieval.
You'll like it there.
You're not listening to me, Mother.
What the hell is this, lady?
It's a present for my son. Really!
I hope you like it. It's very exclusive.
What on earth is it?
Something for an executive.
Madam Lowry! You look exquisite today. Merry Christmas.
Hello, Spiro. Merry Christmas.
- You remember my son, Samuel? - Of course.
We're joining Mrs. Terrain.
Yes, they're waiting.
- Mother, I thought we'd be able to talk. - We will.
- Ida! - She's got what's-her-name with her.
Well, Alma, how are you?
You look wonderful.
Hello, Shirley.
Thank you, Spiro.
- Salt? - Not yet.
Sam, Happy Christmas.
- So sorry we're late. - Thanks.
Now, Alma…
what are you going to have?
I can't make up my mind whether to have the number one or the number two.
What do you recommend, Spiro?
Between you and me, madame…
- today the number two. - Thank you, Spiro.
Shirley, what are you going to have?
Between you and me, mademoiselle, today the number one.
Madam Lowry?
To hell with the diet! I'm going to have a number eight, please.
A most perceptive choice, if I may say so.
Oh, Ida…
- Monsieur? - Steak, please, rare. Mother…
- Monsieur, quel numéro? - I don't know which number.
- Mother, please… - That one. There.
Thanks. Mother, will you…
Alma! You wicked girl. You've started your treatments.
- Say the number, please. - You noticed.
- You have to say the number! - Go away!
I must tell you all about it.
Number three.
- Mother, will you listen to me? - Numéro huit.
Braised veal in wine sauce.
It's too exciting. I've left Dr. Jaffe and gone to Dr. Chapman.
Numéro deux, duck a l'orange.
- Chapman? - Excusez-moi.
The acid man?
Really, Ida. Just because his techniques are revolutionary.
I don't go around calling Dr. Jaffe the knife man.
Numéro un, crevettes a la mayonnaise.
I am sorry, Alma.
- I didn't mean to… - It's all right, Ida.
Steak. Numéro trois!
Mesdames, monsieur…
bon appétit!
- Merci! - Merci!
Acid, on the other hand, can be used for such wonderfully subtle shading…
such delicate nuances.
Like a Rembrandt etching. And it is so much quicker.
If it wasn't for this complication, it could've happened to anybody…
I'd have had this dressing off yesterday.
Shirley.
Salt?
What were we saying?
God, this isn't rare.
By the by, I saw the most wonderful idea for Christmas presents at the chemist's.
Gift tokens. Medical gift tokens.
That sounds marvelous!
It's good at any doctor's and most of the major hospitals.
It's also accepted for gynecological examinations…
including Caesarian sections.
- Spiro. - Madam, I don't know what to say.
This never happens to us. I'm going to do something about it straightaway.
Sam, can't you do something about these terrorists?
It's my lunch hour.
Besides, it's not my department.
Actually, Alma, that's one of the little things I've been dying to tell you.
Sam's being promoted to Information Retrieval.
Why, that's wonderful! Congratulations, Sam.
Stop it! I'm not being promoted. I'm not going to Information Retrieval.
If I wanted to upset you, Mother, I'd tell you where to stick it.
Pepper?
I've got to go.
You haven't had your dessert.
I don't want dessert, promotion or anything!
Of course you want something. You must have hopes, wishes, dreams?
No, nothing. Not even dreams.
Sam.
Sam!
Oh, God!
Hello. Central Services?
I'm at 579B, Block 19, Northwestern Section D.
Exit 1 on Green Pastures Highway at the Orange Blossom Flyover.
I've got trouble with my air conditioning. It's an emergency.
Thanks for calling Central Services. I'm sorry, due to staff shortages…
Central Services cannot take service calls between 2300 and 0900 hours.
Have a nice day. This has not been a recording.
This is an emergency!
Thank you for calling Central Services…
Look, I've got to have a heating engineer.
- Thank you for calling Central Services. - Oh, shit!
Hello.
- Hello. - Hello.
Hello, Mr. Lowry.
Yes, who is this?
Put the phone down and raise your hands.
What? Who is this?
Nice and easy, now.
Just keep your hands where I can see them.
What are you doing?
Harry Tuttle, heating engineer, at your service.
Tuttle?
Are you from Central Services?
I called Central Services.
They're overworked these days.
Luckily, I intercepted your call.
You did…
Just a minute. What was that business with the gun?
Just a precaution, sir.
I've had traps set for me before now.
Plenty of people in Central Services would love to get their hands on Harry Tuttle.
Are you telling me that this is illegal?
Well, yes and no.
Officially, only Central Services can touch this stuff.
Would you hold this, please?
But nowadays, with all the new rules and regulations…
they can't get decent staff anymore.
They turn a blind eye as long as I'm careful.
But if they could prove that I've been working on their equipment…
that's a plate of a different color.
- Wouldn't it be simpler just to… - Hold this, please.
Sorry, yes.
I was saying, wouldn't it be simpler to work with Central Services?
I couldn't stand the…
- It's getting warm. - You couldn't stand the what?
I couldn't stand the paperwork.
Listen…
this system of yours could be on fire, and I couldn't turn on a kitchen tap…
without filling out a 27B/6.
Bloody paperwork.
I suppose one has to expect a certain amount.
Why? I came into this for the action, the excitement.
Go anywhere, travel light.
Get in, get out, wherever there's trouble. A man alone.
They've got the whole country sectioned off. Can't make a move without a form.
Found it. There's your problem.
- Can you fix it? - No, I can't.
But I can bypass it with one of these.
Fine by me.
- Are you expecting anyone? - No.
Wait here. Wait.
The flashlight.
- Central Services. - Central Services.
- Yes. - You rang, sir.
Trouble with your air conditioning?
No, it's all right.
It's fixed.
It's fixed?
Yes. I mean, it fixed itself.
Fixed itself, did it?
Yes.
Machines don't fix themselves.
He's tampered with it.
Sorry you had a wasted journey.
I think we ought to have a look.
Have you got a 27B/6?
A 27B/6?
Now look what you've done to him.
Have you got a 27B/6?
Not as such.
But we'll get one.
It's all right, it's all right.
Sorry. I'm a bit of a stickler for paperwork.
Where would we be if we didn't stick to the correct procedures?
We'll be back.
We'll be back!
Thanks for coming.
We'll be back, you clever bastard!
- Thank you. - We'll show you.
Thanks, Lowry. You're a good man in a tight corner.
I just happen to work at the Ministry of Information.
What?
I just happen to know that…
Information Retrieval are looking for an Archibald Tuttle…
heating engineer.
You wouldn't by any chance… Would you?
My good friends call me Harry.
Information Retrieval?
The big boys.
What do they want you for?
Time to go.
How's that?
You really must let me give you something.
How much will it be for the work?
Come on. You did me a favor. Just check the corridor.
Thanks.
Listen, kid. We're all in this together.
Go on.
All clear.
I think Kurtzmann is getting suspicious.
What's playing today?
Casablanca.
Mr. Lowry, step in here, please.
Lowry!
Now, Mr. Lowry!
Thank God you're here. We're in terrible trouble.
Look at this.
- It's a check. - It's the refund for Tuttle.
Tuttle?
Buttle. I mean Buttle.
It's been confusion from the word go.
He was overcharged for Information Retrieval procedures.
And someone, somewhere, is trying to make us carry the can.
Can I have a look? I've never seen a refund check before.
I'll bet it's Jeffries.
Yes.
He believes that people should pay more for their interrogation.
And B: he loathes me.
We've got to get rid of it.
Send it to somebody else. Better still, send it to Buttle.
After all, it's his check.
I've tried that. Look at this.
You see?
The population census has got him down as dormanted.
The Central Collective Storehouse computer has got him down as deleted.
Hang on.
Information Retrieval's got him inoperative.
Security has got him down as excised.
- Administration's got him as completed. - He's dead.
Dead?
Well, that's awful.
We'll never get rid of the damn thing now.
What are we going to do, Sam?
Could try the next of kin.
There we go. "Buttle, Veronica, Mrs."
Veronica?
What's the number on the check?
27156789…
/074328K.
Right into memory.
Central Banking.
Veronica Buttle…
Mrs.
Deposit.
Thank God for that.
Would you like some tea?
There's a problem.
She doesn't have a bank account.
Well, that's it then.
I might just as well go and hang myself now.
This could never have happened before the stupid 7th tier reorganization.
That's Simmons' doing.
He and Jeffries always sit together at lunch.
Bastards!
Perhaps we could lose the thing behind a filing cabinet or something…
- or burn it, eat it… - Look. There is one solution.
- What? - Drive out to Mrs. Buttle…
let her sign at the back of the check. She can cash it at the corner sweet shop.
That's brilliant, Sam.
I'll even do it for you.
Here, authorize the check. What's the address?
Everything's in here.
What shall I do next?
Pink and blue receipts.
Sign there, there and there. And sign the check there.
I think I've broken a bone.
My wrist is all limp. What a pathetic creature I am!
I'll do it for you.
Right. I'll be on my way.
Sam?
You are good to me, you know.
- Here's looking at you, kid. - Here's looking at you.
Brazil
Where hearts were entertained in June
We stood beneath that amber moon
We interrupt this program to bring you news of a terrorist bombing…
at the Blue Lagoon…
And clung together, then
Tomorrow was another day
The morning found me miles away
With still a million things to say
And now
when twilight beams the sky above
Hello. I wonder if you could tell me where…
Piss off!
Hello.
I'll never confess!
Come on, you've got to interrogate me.
Mrs. Buttle?
Are you Mrs. Buttle?
My name is Lowry.
Sam Lowry.
I'm from the Ministry of Information.
I've come to give you a check.
It's a refund, actually. There was a mistake.
Mistake?
Yes. Not my department, of course. I'm only Records.
I'll tell you what it is.
It seems Mr. Buttle was overcharged by Information Retrieval.
They don't usually make mistakes…
but I suppose we're all human.
What happened to the…
Actually, my coming here is rather unorthodox.
Bringing you this check. Any payments are normally made through Central Computer…
but as there were certain…
difficulties, we thought, rather than cause delay…
we'd let you have it now.
It being Christmas and all.
My husband's dead, isn't he?
I do assure you, Mrs. Buttle, the Ministry is very scrupulous…
about following up and eradicating any error.
But if you do have any complaints you wish to make…
I'd be only too happy to send you the appropriate forms.
What have you done with his body?
I don't know anything about that. I'm really just…
delivering the check. So if…
Look, if you wouldn't mind just signing these two receipts…
I'd be only too happy to leave you in peace.
He hadn't done anything.
He was good!
What have you done with his body?
It isn't being very helpful, is it?
I didn't have to come here, you know, Mrs. Buttle.
I'll kill you, you bastard!
Stop it!
Are you all right?
Mrs. Buttle, are you all right?
It's you.
Wait, stop! Don't go!
Stop! I had nothing to do with it. Wait!
Stop!
He's coming back!
- Go away. - Her name's Jill.
What?
Jill?
Jill who?
Layton.
Jill Layton.
You're a very good little girl.
- What are you doing here? - Waiting for my daddy.
He will be pleased when he gets home.
Sam, I've just had the transport pool onto me.
You don't know anything about a personnel transporter gone missing, do you?
Personnel transporter?
What?
The pranets, I had a personal transporter.
I'll do the paperwork in the morning.
Is it all right about Mrs. Tuttle…
Buttle's check?
- Can I forget it? - Yeah.
What a relief. I'm gonna have nightmares.
Damn! Blast!
What's the matter?
You don't happen to know how to get round an IRQ/3, do you?
All information on third level suspects is classified.
All inquiries through Information Retrieval.
That's hopeless, they'll tell you nothing.
Come the time they want something from us, yes.
There's one way I could get round it.
- I could accept my mother's promotion. - Yes.
No!
You can't. You turned it down.
I didn't sign the form.
I did it for you.
- You didn't? - I did.
You didn't!
I did.
- Why did you do that? - That's what you wanted, isn't it?
I don't know.
I don't know what I want.
Come on, before they turn the lights out.
There is one way around it.
I could accept promotion to Information Retrieval.
Sam.
What are you doing?
My God, what's going on?
Emergency procedures.
I haven't got an emergency.
This is an emergency.
Have a nice day. This has not been a recording.
Here. Sign that.
What is it?
It's a 27B/6. What do you think it is? Where is he?
Spoor, come here. I found it.
Spoor, come here!
Look there, a bypass valve on the transformer.
You've had that scab Tuttle here.
What are you talking about?
Who fixed your ducts?
I told you before, they fixed themselves.
Where did this come from, out of your nostril?
Central Services.
They don't take kindly to sabotage.
This place is in a terrible state.
Just a minute. You're not gonna leave it like this, are you?
Why not?
All you got to do is blow your nose and it's fixed, isn't it?
What have you done with his body?
Mrs. Ida Lowry requests the pleasure of your company
at her apartment tonight from 8:30
to midnight
To celebrate the completion
of her recent cosmetic
surgery
Thanks.
It's reply paid.
Is it?
Two, three.
Mother, I'm sorry but I am unable to come to your party
You don't have to sing it.
I don't?
Aren't you a bit late? The party started an hour ago.
Yes, it's backlog. Everybody complains.
Was it all right otherwise?
Mr. Helpmann, I'm keen to get into Information Retrieval.
Mr. Helpmann, I'm dying to get at this woman.
Where's your invitation?
Don't shoot! Mother!
Sam, I'm so glad you came.
Come in.
Mother?
Oh, God, Mother, is that you?
Of course. Isn't it wonderful?
The bandages came off just this afternoon.
Come on, darling, join in the fun.
Simply everybody's here.
- Is Mr. Helpmann here? Stop shoving! - He is.
Mr. Helpmann is here, and he wants to talk to you.
Good. I want to talk to him.
He says you're the first person ever to refuse a promotion.
- He thinks you should see a doctor. - Actually, Mother, I've decided…
Louis, you know Sam.
Can you believe it?
It's just me and my little knife.
Snip.
Slice.
- Can you believe it? - Congratulations.
- But this is just the beginning. - Really?
Of course, yes. You've seen her with her clothes off.
Faces are a doddle compared to tits and ass.
- No hairlines. - Really, Louis!
I've been looking for you everywhere.
Mother, I have to talk to Mr. Helpmann.
- You stupid sod. - Dear boy…
what do you think of your mother now?
It will never last.
Excuse me.
Dr. Chapman, did you say something?
That technique, I've tried it.
A nice effect, but highly unstable.
In six months, she'll look like Grandma Moses.
See here, Chapman.
At least mine don't end up looking like they've been mugged.
What have you done with his body?
- What happened to you? - There's a little complication.
Dr. Chapman says it often happens with a delicate skin like mine.
Nothing to worry about.
He's promised these bandages will be off in a jiffy.
- Actually, there's someone I want to meet. - I know.
Here we are.
I'm going to leave you two lovebirds in peace.
Hello, Shirley.
Come on.
Do you want a drink?
Chase those years away.
Listen, Shirley.
Look, your mother and my mother have the idea that…
Look, I'm very flattered.
And, well, I just don't want you to be under any false impressions.
It's all right.
I don't like you, either.
Sam!
Jack! Excuse me, Shirley.
I'm sorry.
- Do you remember Alison? - Good evening.
Alison, Sam Lowry, an old friend.
Alison, yes, of course.
- You look different. - I'm two years older.
And she's been to Dr. Jaffe. She doesn't like me telling people.
But, in fact, she's really pleased.
- I knew there was something different. - Remember how they used to stick out?
What?
Yes, well, rather.
I always used to wonder if they were real.
What, my ears?
- Dr. Jaffe pinned her ears back. - Yes, that's…
I always wondered if she wore falsies.
Mr. Helpmann.
False ears.
- Hello, Jack. - You remember my wife, Alison?
Of course, Barbara, isn't it? How are you?
Barbara's very well. How are you?
- Fine, thanks. - Good.
Hello, Sam. Ida said you might be here. Have you got a minute?
Would you excuse us?
Of course. Come on, Alison… Barbara.
Sam…
I need your help.
Thanks very much.
Mr. Helpmann, I'm glad to be of help.
And if I can help you…
Your father and I were very close.
Of course, Jeremiah was senior to me, but we were close friends.
Especially after the bombing.
And now I keep his name alive at the office every day.
It's as though he's there still speaking to me.
"'Ere I am…
"J.H."
The ghost in the machine.
I know he would've wanted me to help you.
And I promised your mother…
that I'd take you onto the team at Information Retrieval.
- But I gather that you… - Well…
actually, Mr. Helpmann, I've changed my mind.
I've decided I'd accept the transfer.
If I'm not too late.
Too late?
That's for me to say.
Well, then I am…
Welcome to Information Retrieval.
My name's Lowry.
Sam Lowry.
I've been told to report to Mr. Warrenn.
Thirtieth floor, sir.
You're expected.
- Don't you want to search me? - No, sir.
- Want to see my ID? - No need, sir.
- But I could be anybody. - No, you couldn't, sir.
This is Information Retrieval.
The lift's arrived, sir.
Half as terrorists, rest as victims.
Definitely, no.
My name's Lowry, Mr. Warrenn. Sam Lowry.
Yes. No. Cancel that. Okay.
Glad to have you on board.
Don't be ridiculous, Jenkins.
Yes.
You'll like it up here.
We've got a crack team of… Are they kidding? …decision makers.
In triplicate. I'm expecting big things… Two copies to Finance! …of you.
Between you and me, Lowry…
this department is about to be upgraded.
Here we are.
Your very own number on your very own door.
And behind that door, your very own office.
Congratulations, DZ/015.
Welcome to the team.
Yes. No. Cancel that.
Send two copies to Finance.
You can't borrow any more chairs! There's only one left in here now…
- and I need that to sit on! - What?
Sorry.
Who are you?
My name's Lowry. Sam Lowry.
Oh, yes, the new boy from next door.
My name's Lime. Harvey Lime.
Welcome to Expediting.
Would you mind if I borrowed your computer console?
I'll let you have it back in 10 minutes.
You want to take my console into your office?
Yes, just for a few minutes.
I'll tell you what…
you tell me what you want, and I'll do it for you.
I'm a bit of a whiz on that thing.
All right.
- I need information on a woman named… - A woman?
- I see. - Yes.
I know her age and distinguishing marks, but I need an address, her place of work.
This your dream girl, is it?
Look, let me use your console.
You must be joking.
When there's a woman involved, there's no stopping me.
Let's have that sheet.
Sod it, it's broken!
But you haven't switched it on.
Oh, yes.
You're putting me off standing there. Go back to your office.
I'll give you a knock when I've finished.
Go on, I'm not going to elope with her.
All right.
Sam!
Sam.
Don't go.
Please.
Well?
- Computers are my forte. - Let me see.
"Gillian Layton. Coloring: white. Hair: blonde. Eyes: blue. Height: 5'4".
"Distinguishing scar on left…"
Is this all you've got?
Best to take things slowly where some women are concerned.
Let me see.
Hey, that's mine!
"Layton.
"Truck driver. All inquiries…
"reference officer 412/L. Room 5001."
Lowry, glad I caught you…
Send that back. Settling down? I want this order rescinded.
There's a query about a personnel transporter you took out from the pool.
Or was it a personnel carrier you took?
Send that up to Security. Anyway, tidy it up, there's a good chap.
Get a new suit. You want the lift?
Can I help you?
I'm looking for Officer 412/L.
He won't be very long now.
I thought so.
You may go in now.
Not that one. That one.
Yes.
Excuse me, are you officer 412/L?
Excuse me!
Jack!
I heard you were coming aboard. Congratulations.
- DZ/015. - Thanks.
Are you officer 412/L?
That's me. For Sam.
- A very happy Christmas. - Thanks, Jack.
- You're settling in all right? - Yes, fine.
I need some information.
This is Information Retrieval, not Information Dispersal.
Amy, don't throw the ball around in here.
- I'm not Amy, I'm Holly. - Did I call you Amy, darling? I'm sorry.
- A triplet? - One of them, I think.
Barbara's taken the other two Christmas shopping.
You're not gonna keep calling her Barbara, are you?
Why not? Barbara's a perfectly good name, isn't it? Don't you like it?
Yes, it's fine.
Come on, let's get these together.
I need to find out about a woman.
Come on, Chloe, let's show Uncle Sam how we make the word "cat."
- Shall we? - I'm Holly.
Sorry, love. So you are.
This is her.
Layton. Oh, shit.
- How much do you know about this? - Not much.
- What does B58/732 mean to you? - Buttle.
I knew it. You always were bloody quick.
Who else knows?
Warrenn? Helpmann?
I don't know. I only know you got the wrong man.
Information Transit got the wrong man.
I got the right man. The wrong man was delivered to me as the right man.
I accepted him on good faith as the right man.
Was I wrong?
You killed Buttle?
There are rigid parameters laid down to prevent such things happening.
It wasn't my fault that Buttle's heart condition wasn't on Tuttle's file.
How are you getting on?
- I really need to know about… - Tuttle?
We'll bring Tuttle in…
and interrogate him at the same voltage as Mr. Buttle.
And juggle the books in electrical banking.
- What has Tuttle done? - We suspect him of freelance subversion.
Freelance subversive?
Then all I need to wrap up the case is the Layton woman.
What has she done?
She witnessed the Tuttle… Buttle arrest.
Since then she's been going around making wild allegations…
trying to exploit the situation.
She's working for someone, and I don't think it's us.
Terrorist?
Mr. Lint, the next customer has been delivered.
- Thank you, Myrtle. - What're you gonna do about Layton?
I put her on the detention list. Security should have her here before 6:00.
What, here?
So that she can spill the beans inside the department?
Don't do that.
Why don't I try and get to her for you? I'll…
- I'll deactivate her. - What does that mean?
I want nothing unsavory.
Trust me, Jack.
Come on, put these away. Mommy will be back.
Let me have her file.
Trust me, Jack.
All right.
But for Christ's sake, don't lose it.
You sit down there, darling.
Don't worry, I'll get to her.
You'll never get anywhere in a suit like that.
Here.
Try this.
- Bye-bye. - 'Bye.
But, Jack, I…
Put it on, big boy. I won't look at your willy.
Let him go.
Come on.
Shit!
Oi!
- Come out of there. - What?
That's the Deputy Minister's lift.
Sorry, I'm in a hurry.
Come here, sonny. Let's see your ID card.
My ID?
Oh, God!
This isn't my suit.
Look, my name's Lowry, Sam Lowry.
- Look, really, can't this wait? - No, sir.
I'm going to have to fill in a report on this.
Now, then, what is the date today?
It's the… Oh, God, it'll have to wait!
You, stop!
Stop!
Well done, men. Quick thinking.
Excellent work.
I'll take charge of her now.
Good.
Okay.
It's a classified matter.
I'll include your fine handling of the situation in my report.
Great.
Merry Christmas, Dawson.
Come along with me, please.
Okay, thanks. Well done, men.
Excellent. Good turnout. Very good, thank you.
Just keep moving.
Hey, stop!
Come back here.
Pick up all these things.
Come on, pick them up.
Disgraceful.
Can't you even…
You illiterate foreign pig!
You come over here from your own filthy country…
and mess up our streets.
God!
Well done! Let's go!
What are you doing? For Christ's sake, keep moving!
Get out of my cab.
What? Just drive!
- You've touched me. Nobody touches me. - What do you…
Please, drive on! Drive on, will you?
Shit. Move over, I'll drive.
Don't touch that! Don't touch anything!
It's okay, Officer. Thank you. I've got everything under control.
Oh, shit!
Listen, please drive. Trust me. You are in terrible danger.
You're an embarrassment.
Please drive. Trust me.
Drive and I'll explain everything.
Please, get out of my cab.
I'm sorry, I…
Okay, you've asked for it. I'm Information Retrieval Officer…
DZ/105 and I'm arresting you so…
drive on, or I'll blast your fucking head off!
Go!
Look, I'm sorry about that. I mean, touching you without permission.
Hello, my name's Lowry. Sam Lowry.
I've been…
You won't believe this. I know it will sound incredible…
but I've been dreaming about you.
No, not like that. I mean, I love you.
I mean, in my dreams, I love you and…
Extraordinary, isn't it?
Anyway…
You don't believe me, do you?
You probably think I'm bonkers, right? Mad, raving.
No! I think you're very attractive.
What?
Yeah. Sit back. Let me have a look at you.
Oh, yeah.
Good looking, sexy. Just my type.
I don't believe you.
Why not?
Well, I just don't deserve such terrific luck.
You're damn right.
You don't trust me, do you?
- My God, we shouldn't have come here! - I've got a job to do.
But they'll be lying in wait!
Christ, you're paranoid. You got no sense of reality.
Wait!
- We should take the lorry and get away! - Yeah, where to?
- Anywhere. As fast as possible. - There isn't anywhere.
- Just far away. - It's not far enough.
Jill!
What's in the parcel?
A Christmas present.
It's heavy.
Heavy Christmas present.
If you don't trust me, open it.
No, it's fine.
I'd spoil the wrapping.
Anyway, if I want you to trust me, it's only fair that I should trust you.
Doesn't it bother you, the sort of things you do at Information Retrieval?
Suppose you'd rather have terrorists.
How many actual terrorists have you met, Sam?
- Actual terrorists? - Yeah.
It's only my first day.
A roadblock.
- What're we gonna do? - Stay calm.
Don't slow down! Don't stop!
Please, do as I say. Go straight ahead. Go!
What the fuck are you doing, you stupid…
We did it! We broke right through them!
Faster! Don't let them see you. Just go!
Keep going! Faster!
- Please, get your foot down! - Stay off of me!
Go faster!
- What if we lose the house? - Don't touch anything!
Don't touch that!
We did it! We did it!
Oh, no!
What would you like for Christmas?
My own credit card.
- Why have we come here? - Go away.
- Why don't we go back to my flat? - Forget it.
You don't trust me?
Trust you? A man who hijacks my truck, loses me my job…
has every security man in town looking for me? Of course I do.
- I was only trying to help. - Yeah!
I don't trust you either. What's in that parcel?
You saved it from the lorry. It must be very special.
I saved you from the lorry. You're not very special.
- I'm gonna open it. - Don't touch it.
Sam!
It's me…
and Shirley.
Mrs. Terrain!
- That should hold it. - Sam?
Hello, Shirley.
What's happened to you now?
My complication had a little complication.
But Dr. Chapman says I'll soon be up…
and bounding about like a young gazelle.
You buying a Christmas present for your mother?
Yes, a little something.
Shirley and I come here regular-larly.
We love romantic lingerie.
Picture me in these.
Oh, my God!
Sam, where are you going?
Jill?
Are you all right?
You don't deserve to be!
What a bloody stupid thing!
How could you? Look at these people!
My God!
It was a bomb!
I should've opened it. I sat there with it next…
There's your bomb, asshole!
A bribe for official monkeys like you.
Make yourself useful.
Here!
Don't touch her! She's hurt.
Don't touch her!
Stop!
Sam, no!
These helmets make your scalp itch.
Don't mention it. And they make you sweat.
Half the time I can never see where I'm going.
It's a great Niagara of perspiration coming down.
I'm lucky. I've got these thick eyebrows.
That keeps it up and channels it out to the ears.
Jill!
Who's he?
I don't know, somebody from Information Retrieval.
They're always hanging around in lingerie.
Where is she?
Jill, is that you?
Excuse me, sir. That is government property.
Jill! Answer me!
I'm looking for a girl with blonde hair.
She's medium height, green eyes.
I don't know, sir. They check all that at the depot.
We can't allow that. It's more than our job's worth.
Jill, you must be here.
You can fill in an application form if you're a relative.
Now do stop, sir, please.
Sorry about that, sir.
Regulations.
This is a black eye for the department, Lowry.
I don't care how you behaved at Records.
Informational Retrieval is an executive branch.
We're proud of our reputation and we protect it.
That convoy of personnel carriers is still not accounted for!
I thought I told you to deal with it. And what is this mess?
An empty desk is an efficient desk! Good God!
Queries from Security. Searches from Central Banking about a check.
Clarification notices from Accounting about unreturned receipts!
- Mr. Warrenn, I have to find out… - Shut up!
I don't know what's going on here, Lowry.
But don't think you can intimidate us with your friends in high places!
Now shape up!
Lime, I have to use your computer.
Sorry, a bit busy at the moment.
You seem to have rather a lot to get on with yourself.
Shit!
Come off it, Jack.
Of course you can check to see if she's been arrested.
Sorry, Sam, this case has become more complicated since last we talked.
But she's innocent, Jack. She's done nothing wrong.
Tell that to the wives of the men she blew up this afternoon.
She's not alone in all this.
We just had a report in that Tuttle…
has wrecked an entire flat and sabotaged adjacent Central Services.
As a matter of fact, it looks like in your block.
I'd keep my eyes open if I were you. 'Bye.
But, Jack, you don't think Tuttle and the girl are in league, do you?
I do. Everything's connected. All along the line.
Cause and effect, that's the beauty of it.
Our job is to trace the connections and then reveal them.
This whole Buttle-Tuttle confusion was obviously planned from the inside.
But, Jack…
She's innocent, Jack.
- We've always been close, haven't we? - Yes, Jack.
Until this all blows over, just stay away from me.
It's you!
What's happening?
Your thermostat's gone, and then some.
What happened to my flat?
Hello? What?
It's for you, but…
as you don't live here anymore.
- What? - Absolutely.
Do you know what this is?
This is an H2206…
authorizing the compulsory, temporary requisitioning of this flat…
for our necessary repairs.
Don't forget your receipt!
I'm sorry, but I'm a bit of a stickler for paperwork.
Bastards!
What are you doing?
It's getting cold in here.
Oh, God!
It smells badly.
It's shit! We're filling up with shit!
Oh, shit.
We're all in it together, kid.
Jill!
Oh, God.
Are you all right?
- What happened to you after… - Your face. Are you hurt?
No, I'm fine.
I've been worried sick about you.
- Who was that? - That's a friend of mine.
Oh, God! Holy shit!
We better get out of here, quick. Come on.
Thank God! Here, take it.
It's not so big.
Are you sure this is all right?
Yes, certain.
My mother's away for Christmas.
She's spending it at the plastic surgeon's.
The wraps come off tomorrow.
Lock the door after me. Don't answer the phone to anyone.
I won't be long.
- Where're you going? - I know a way to save you.
Trust me. I can do it.
You can't go without me!
Excuse me, Dawson, could you put me through to Mr. Helpmann's office?
I'm afraid I can't, sir. You have to go through the proper channels.
And you can't tell me what the proper channels are…
because that's classified information.
I'm glad to see the Ministry's continuing its tradition of recruiting the brightest.
Thank you, Dawson.
- Goodnight, Mr. Lime. - Goodnight, Dawson.
No, no, Arthur. You're flat on the G!
It's your breathing. Take a deep breath after "Noel."
Ready, one, two, three.
"'Ere I am, J.H."
The ghost in the machine.
Mr. Helpmann?
Jill.
Who's there?
What do you think?
Is it me?
What?
You don't exist anymore.
I've killed you.
Jill Layton is dead.
Care for a little necrophilia?
Merry Christmas.
Something for an executive?
She's dead.
This is a friend of mine.
No!
Sam!
93/HKS/608, you are charged with the following:
"Giving aid and comfort to the enemies of society.
"Attempting to conceal a fugitive from justice.
"Passing confidential documents to unauthorized personnel.
"Destroying government property, viz. several personnel carriers.
"Taking possession under false pretences of said carriers.
"Forging the signature of the Head of Records.
"Misdirecting funds in the form of a check to A. Buttle…
"through unauthorized channels.
"Tampering with Central Services' supply ducts.
"Obstructing forces of law and order.
"Disgracing the good name of the government…
"and the Department of Information Retrieval.
"Disrupting the Ministry's internal communicating system.
"Wasting Ministry time and paper."
Now, either you can plead guilty to seven or eight of the charges…
which will help keep costs down within your means…
or borrow a sum to be negotiated from us at a very competitive rate.
We can offer you something at eleven-and-a-half percent over 30 years…
but you will have to buy insurance to qualify for this scheme.
If you prefer something more specific…
say, against electrical charges over L70…
All you're requested to do now is sign this form.
Think carefully before you sign.
Thinking ahead in financial matters is always a wise course.
Plead guilty.
It's cheaper.
Sam, what are we going to do with you?
Where's Jill?
I've got to find her.
Please, you've got to get me out of here.
I understand, Sam. I know exactly how you feel…
so I brought you a bottle of barley water.
Please help me.
I assure you, I'm doing everything within my power.
But the rules of the game are laid down.
We all have to play by them. Even me.
It's all a mistake. You've got to understand that.
From the Department's point of view, there was certainly a bit of an own goal.
I'm not a terrorist.
You know that. Please get me out of here!
Sam, Information Retrieval is expensive.
You're running up an enormous bill by not cooperating.
Please, Mr. Helpmann…
help me find Jill.
Sam, I think I ought to tell you.
I'm afraid she's upped stumps and retired to the pavilion.
Thrown in the towel.
Dead?
Yes.
It's all a bit confusing, but it seems she was killed resisting arrest.
No, it's all right. I did that.
The odd thing is it appears to have happened twice.
A bit of a disputed call, I'm afraid.
Twice?
There you are. All I can say is don't fall at the last fence.
The finish is in sight. See you in the paddock.
Do cooperate. Think of your mother.
Good luck. Keep your eye on the ball.
Got to go. Can't keep the orphans waiting.
No!
Don't fight it, son. Confess. Quickly.
If you hold out too long, you could jeopardize your credit rating.
Jack?
Shut up!
Jack, I'm innocent. Please help me.
Bastard!
Jack, this is all a mistake. Please, Jack.
Take that mask off.
You stupid bastard!
How could you do this to me?
Jack, I'm frightened.
How do you think I feel? You shit!
- Jack… - Shut up!
This is a professional relationship.
You can't!
No, Jack, please!
You okay?
Tuttle!
Call me Harry.
Let's go!
Mr. Lowry, so pleased you could make it.
Right this way.
It's a sad loss.
Your mother was with her at the end.
Mrs. Terrain has just received that most wonderful of gifts.
She came to us physically new.
She goes hence from us not so physically new.
But the spirit never grows old.
Madam Lowry!
Mother!
Sam!
Mother?
Stop calling me that.
Mother, please!
Is this guy bothering you?
Mother!
Go away. This is a very sacred moment.
He's got away from us, Jack.
I'm afraid you're right, Mr. Helpmann. He's gone.
Tomorrow was another day
The morning found me miles away
With still a million things to say
Now
As twilight beams the sky above
Recalling thrills of our love
There's one thing I'm certain of
Return I will
To old Brazil