1
00:02:55,909 --> 00:02:57,604
Hold on, I gotta come up!
2
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,908
I've gotta take
the world's biggest fucking piss.
3
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,845
We can't be late!
4
00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:03,508
We won't!
5
00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:28,435
Who's... who's holding?
6
00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:30,136
If you 're not, then nobody.
7
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:31,939
We were kind of hoping you were.
8
00:03:32,012 --> 00:03:34,503
- Yeah. How are you not holding?
- Jesus Christ, Shanna.
9
00:03:34,581 --> 00:03:37,675
It is not my fucking job to supply y'all
with weed when we go out.
10
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,946
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, little lady.
11
00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:42,011
You're gettin' angry kind of quick,
don't you think?
12
00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:43,283
I was just teasin' you!
13
00:03:43,357 --> 00:03:44,790
I'm not angry.
It just would be nice
14
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:47,588
if y'all didn't just count on me
all the fucking time
15
00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:50,494
and surprise me
every once in a while with pot.
16
00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:52,532
Okay, mean girl
in a high school movie.
17
00:03:52,599 --> 00:03:53,964
Are you through
having a tantrum?
18
00:03:54,034 --> 00:03:55,228
I'm not having a tantrum.
19
00:03:55,302 --> 00:03:57,566
Yes, you are. You've been
in the car all of two seconds,
20
00:03:57,638 --> 00:03:58,798
and you're already cursing at me.
21
00:03:58,872 --> 00:04:00,635
I am not cursing at you.
22
00:04:00,707 --> 00:04:04,803
You said "Jesus Christ, Shanna,"
23
00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:06,368
and then before
the sentence was over
24
00:04:06,447 --> 00:04:09,314
you threw a "fucking" in there
to emphasize your irritatedness.
25
00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:11,715
Come on, don't fight.
I'll pay for it when we get some.
26
00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:15,812
One, it is not about the money.
It is about the pain in the ass of scoring.
27
00:04:15,889 --> 00:04:18,050
And two, we're not really fighting.
28
00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:21,788
Arlene, you've forgotten what
hanging out with Jungle Julia is like.
29
00:04:21,862 --> 00:04:23,090
That wasn't a fight.
30
00:04:23,163 --> 00:04:25,723
That was Julia
acting like a grumpy bitch
31
00:04:25,799 --> 00:04:29,667
and me calling her on it
and indulging her at the same time.
32
00:04:29,736 --> 00:04:32,728
That's how we tolerate each other
after all these years.
33
00:04:32,806 --> 00:04:33,795
Oh! Billboard!
34
00:04:38,212 --> 00:04:40,146
So, what's the plan, man?
35
00:04:40,214 --> 00:04:42,182
Margaritas and Mexican food at Guero's.
36
00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:44,114
Did you call Rafael
and tell him we're coming?
37
00:04:44,184 --> 00:04:45,617
- Of course.
- You 're so good.
38
00:04:45,686 --> 00:04:46,880
I know.
39
00:04:46,954 --> 00:04:49,422
Okay, is Christian Simonson
gonna be there?
40
00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:52,152
You bet your ass he is...
with Jesse Letterman.
41
00:04:52,226 --> 00:04:55,252
Christian Simonson,
the filmmaker, is in town.
42
00:04:55,329 --> 00:04:56,762
He's got a big thing for Julia.
43
00:04:56,830 --> 00:04:59,094
If he had a big thing for me,
he'd fucking call me,
44
00:04:59,166 --> 00:05:00,827
as opposed to disappearing
for six months,
45
00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:03,165
and he'd get his ass down here
more often than he does.
46
00:05:03,237 --> 00:05:05,967
And on my birthday
he'd give me a fucking phone call.
47
00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:07,233
Oh, billboard!
48
00:05:14,681 --> 00:05:17,411
Yeah, but you get
those legs of yours around him,
49
00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:18,542
and it's all over.
50
00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:22,180
Yeah, well, when I'm redecorating
his house in the hills that I am also living in,
51
00:05:22,256 --> 00:05:23,723
I'll let you know it worked.
52
00:05:23,790 --> 00:05:26,350
So, margaritas
and Mexican food at Guero's,
53
00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:28,394
touch base with Chris and Jesse,
tell them about later,
54
00:05:28,462 --> 00:05:30,555
and make damn sure they come.
55
00:05:30,631 --> 00:05:33,794
Those other guys'll be waiting for us
at the Texas Chili Parlor.
56
00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:37,325
Oh, shit. Speaking of which...
57
00:05:37,404 --> 00:05:39,201
what happened
with you and Nate last night?
58
00:05:39,273 --> 00:05:41,969
Well, you know, not much.
We just fucking met each other.
59
00:05:42,042 --> 00:05:44,875
If you don't bust their balls a little bit,
they're never gonna respect you.
60
00:05:44,945 --> 00:05:47,311
Okay, we're pretty clear
on what it is you didn't do.
61
00:05:47,381 --> 00:05:49,576
How about enlightening us
on what it is you did do?
62
00:05:49,650 --> 00:05:51,675
Oh, nothing to write home about.
63
00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:54,152
We just made out on the couch
for about 20 minutes.
64
00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:55,711
Dressed, half-dressed, or naked?
65
00:05:55,789 --> 00:05:58,519
Dressed. I said we made out.
We didn't do "the thing."
66
00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:01,993
Oh, excuse me for living,
but what is "the thing"?
67
00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:03,893
You know, it's everything but.
68
00:06:03,964 --> 00:06:05,693
They call that "the thing"?
69
00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:07,324
I call it "the thing."
70
00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:09,358
Do guys like "the thing"?
71
00:06:09,436 --> 00:06:11,131
They like it better than "no thing."
72
00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:15,407
Okay, I wanna get back
to what it is you did do.
73
00:06:15,475 --> 00:06:17,033
So you're making out
on the couch with Nate, right?
74
00:06:17,110 --> 00:06:18,099
Correct.
75
00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:19,668
Whose couch?
His or the one in your hotel room?
76
00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:22,180
What am I, stupid over here? Mine.
77
00:06:22,249 --> 00:06:24,274
Were you making out
sitting up or lying down?
78
00:06:24,351 --> 00:06:26,785
We started sitting up,
we worked our way to lying down.
79
00:06:26,853 --> 00:06:29,947
Hmm. The plot thickens.
Who was on top?
80
00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,854
I was straddling him.
81
00:06:32,659 --> 00:06:33,648
What else?
82
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,696
That was it. So we made out
for a little while on the couch...
83
00:06:36,763 --> 00:06:41,564
and I said, "Okay, I'm gonna go to bed now,
so it's time for you to leave."
84
00:06:41,635 --> 00:06:44,399
And then he starts to whine,
"Oh, right now?"
85
00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:47,565
And I said,
"Yup, right now. Let's go."
86
00:06:47,641 --> 00:06:50,201
And he says, "Wait, what about this?"
And I said no.
87
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:52,211
He said, "What do you mean?
You don't know what I'm gonna say."
88
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:55,407
I said, "I already know what you're
gonna say, and the answer's no."
89
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,177
He said, "Well, how can you say
you know what I'm gonna say?"
90
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,775
And I said, "Because you're gonna say,
'Let's just go to sleep together.
91
00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:01,150
'We don't gotta do nothing.
92
00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:03,280
'Just cuddle,
sleep next to each other,
93
00:07:03,357 --> 00:07:05,222
wake up in the morning together.'"
94
00:07:05,292 --> 00:07:08,659
"No. You 're gonna leave...
but I'll see you tomorrow."
95
00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:09,991
Yeah, fuck Nate.
96
00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:11,087
I mean, he's cute and all,
97
00:07:11,164 --> 00:07:14,099
but Jesse Letterman
is gonna be all over her.
98
00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:17,500
Remember...
no hookin' up tonight.
99
00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:21,132
You can hang out with them,
you can make out with them,
100
00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:23,199
but no hookin' up with them,
101
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:26,609
because we are driving
to Lake L.B.J. tonight,
102
00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:28,648
and my daddy's pretty clear
about one thing...
103
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:33,812
He said, "I am lettin' you
and your girlfriends stay at my lake house,
104
00:07:33,887 --> 00:07:38,017
not you and a bunch of horny boys
trying to get their fuck on with my daughter."
105
00:07:38,091 --> 00:07:40,423
- Your dad talks like that?
- Hell yeah.
106
00:07:40,494 --> 00:07:42,758
And it's not like
he ain't gonna know, either,
107
00:07:42,829 --> 00:07:46,458
because when I'm staying at the lake house
with my girlfriends in our bikinis,
108
00:07:46,533 --> 00:07:50,594
Daddy just has a tendency to pop up
and make sure we don't need anything.
109
00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:55,668
Look, he's totally harmless
and cute as a bug's ear!
110
00:07:55,742 --> 00:07:58,438
But you know, when he's got
a bunch of half-naked poontang
111
00:07:58,512 --> 00:08:00,810
walking the floor of his lake house,
112
00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:04,282
he just likes to pay us a visit
and make sure we got everything we need.
113
00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:05,909
And if you flirt shamelessly with him,
114
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:08,546
like the six-foot baby giraffe
in the backseat,
115
00:08:08,622 --> 00:08:10,647
you got a puppy dog for life.
116
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,282
I have my own relationship with Ben,
117
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:14,259
and you're just jealous
'cause it don't include you.
118
00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:15,624
You call her dad "Ben"?
119
00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:18,028
I'm not a child.
That's his name.
120
00:08:18,098 --> 00:08:20,066
So, when are the boys
showing up?
121
00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:22,294
They're gonna meet us
at the Chili Parlor.
122
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:23,893
Maybe they can bring some pot.
123
00:08:23,970 --> 00:08:25,437
Fuck that. No.
124
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,803
I don't wanna be either A,
depending on their fucking ass,
125
00:08:27,874 --> 00:08:29,307
or B, depending on their ass.
126
00:08:29,376 --> 00:08:30,638
Uh-uh. If we don't score ourselves,
127
00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:33,339
we're gonna be stuck with them
all fucking night.
128
00:08:33,413 --> 00:08:35,540
Ooh! Try Lanna-Frank.
129
00:08:35,615 --> 00:08:37,310
Best idea you had all day.
130
00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:40,410
Oh, hey! That's your
last billboard before Guero's!
131
00:08:40,487 --> 00:08:42,478
Oh, come on, give me a break.
132
00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:45,150
Oh, come on, my ass!
We said every time.
133
00:08:45,225 --> 00:08:46,249
Okay.
134
00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:02,502
Jules, let me get a drag.
135
00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:03,838
Thanks.
136
00:09:34,641 --> 00:09:35,630
Oh, my God.
137
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:38,910
Hey, this is...
and I's U.T. days, Arlene.
138
00:09:38,979 --> 00:09:39,968
Hey.
139
00:09:40,046 --> 00:09:42,640
- You wanna join us?
- For a second, but I'm with some friends.
140
00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:44,682
Ooh...
141
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,912
So, you must be... must be...
142
00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:49,785
So, you must be
the infamous Butterfly.
143
00:09:49,856 --> 00:09:51,084
Shh!
144
00:09:51,158 --> 00:09:53,058
She don't know nothing about it.
145
00:09:53,126 --> 00:09:54,957
- Know about what?
- When were y'all gonna tell her?
146
00:09:55,028 --> 00:09:56,120
- Soon.
- Tell me what?
147
00:09:56,196 --> 00:09:58,926
Yeah, now thanks to you,
we've gotta tell her sooner than later.
148
00:09:58,999 --> 00:10:00,591
All right, cut the shit.
What the fuck is going on?
149
00:10:00,667 --> 00:10:03,329
I said a little something-something
about you on the air today.
150
00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:05,598
Julia, what the fuck
did you say about me on the radio?
151
00:10:05,672 --> 00:10:09,108
All I said was I had
a sexy friend named Butterfly
152
00:10:09,176 --> 00:10:11,201
who was in from out-of-town
for the weekend,
153
00:10:11,278 --> 00:10:13,906
and we would be going out
somewhere in Austin tonight,
154
00:10:13,980 --> 00:10:16,380
and if they were out on the town,
maybe they'd see us.
155
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:21,045
And I described you, and I said
that if they spotted you while we were out,
156
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:24,090
if they'd do something,
you'd do something.
157
00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:25,454
Okay, now, Julia, I'm serious.
158
00:10:25,525 --> 00:10:27,925
What did you say
and what did you say I'd do?
159
00:10:27,994 --> 00:10:31,930
Anywho, I could explain what I said,
which would be boring,
160
00:10:31,998 --> 00:10:34,660
or Marcy over here,
161
00:10:34,734 --> 00:10:37,294
who is an incredible actress,
could act it out for you,
162
00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:41,466
which I think will give you a better idea
what you have in store for you tonight.
163
00:10:41,541 --> 00:10:43,600
Okay, so just tell me your way.
164
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,668
- So we'll act it out with Marcy?
- Sure.
165
00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:47,940
Okay, give Marcy your drink.
166
00:10:49,182 --> 00:10:52,640
Okay, so you 're
in a club or a bar,
167
00:10:52,719 --> 00:10:55,779
and Marcy's a kind of cute
or kind of hot or kind of sexy
168
00:10:55,856 --> 00:10:57,585
or better be
fucking hysterically funny,
169
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:00,387
but not-funny-looking guy
who you could fuck.
170
00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:01,688
Got it.
171
00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:03,524
Okay, Marcy, take it.
172
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:13,636
Howdy.
173
00:11:13,707 --> 00:11:16,005
Hi, there.
174
00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:18,772
Excuse me, but...
175
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,904
your name wouldn't be
"Butterfly," would it?
176
00:11:20,981 --> 00:11:24,883
Yes, it is, and it seems
you have me at a disadvantage.
177
00:11:24,951 --> 00:11:26,384
Barry.
178
00:11:26,453 --> 00:11:28,148
Pleased to meet you, Barry.
179
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,688
Y'all are gettin' me hot!
180
00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:30,882
Shh!
181
00:11:34,060 --> 00:11:38,224
So is, uh...
"Butterfly" your real name?
182
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:40,027
Yes, it is.
183
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:42,034
And how'd you know
my name, Barry?
184
00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:44,900
I listened to Jungle Julia's show
this mornin'.
185
00:11:44,971 --> 00:11:46,097
Oh, you did, did you?
186
00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:48,504
Oh, yeah, I listen to her show
every morning.
187
00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:50,600
Oh, you do, do you?
188
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:53,669
Yeah, she's like
the coolest lady in town.
189
00:11:53,747 --> 00:11:56,215
Don't you think
she's got a big ass?
190
00:11:56,283 --> 00:11:59,684
Nah, man!
I like her ass that way.
191
00:11:59,753 --> 00:12:01,721
She got a black girl's ass.
192
00:12:01,788 --> 00:12:03,449
Well, that's what she always says,
193
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:06,390
but in actual fact, she doesn't
really have a black girl's ass.
194
00:12:06,459 --> 00:12:08,450
She's got a big ass.
195
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:09,927
Okay, what the fuck
are you doing?
196
00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:11,861
Look who wants
to get to the point all of a sudden.
197
00:12:11,932 --> 00:12:13,126
Okay, we'll get to the point,
198
00:12:13,199 --> 00:12:15,099
but for your information,
skinny bitch,
199
00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:18,262
black men and a whole lot
of motherfuckin' white men
200
00:12:18,338 --> 00:12:20,898
have had plenty of fun
adoring my ass.
201
00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:24,102
I don't wear their teeth marks
on my butt for nothing.
202
00:12:24,177 --> 00:12:26,611
If you're not gonna buy me a drink,
can I have mine back?
203
00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:29,046
No, okay, okay, okay, okay.
204
00:12:29,115 --> 00:12:30,446
So, Butterfly...
205
00:12:30,517 --> 00:12:32,007
can I buy you a drink?
206
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:33,416
I'd love one.
207
00:12:33,486 --> 00:12:34,475
What can I get ya?
208
00:12:34,554 --> 00:12:36,146
I'll take a margarita.
209
00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:38,649
Here ya go.
210
00:12:39,893 --> 00:12:41,827
So, after they buy you a drink
211
00:12:41,895 --> 00:12:44,295
when they raise
their glass to toast,
212
00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:49,358
they look you dead in the eye
and repeat this poem...
213
00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:53,805
"The woods are lovely,
dark and deep
214
00:12:53,873 --> 00:12:59,038
And I have promises to keep
and miles to go before I sleep."
215
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,977
Did you hear me, Butterfly?
216
00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:04,016
"Miles to go before you sleep."
217
00:13:04,084 --> 00:13:07,713
And then, if they say that...
218
00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:10,386
you gotta give 'em a lap dance.
219
00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:12,084
What?
220
00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:14,649
If they call you "Butterfly,"
buy you a drink, repeat that poem,
221
00:13:14,728 --> 00:13:15,717
you gotta give 'em a lap dance.
222
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,695
That's bullshit.
I ain't giving them nothin'.
223
00:13:17,764 --> 00:13:19,391
Well, you can do it or not,
but if you don't,
224
00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:21,764
everybody in Austin
is gonna think you a chicken shit.
225
00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:23,359
And I don't think you want
everybody in Austin
226
00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:24,960
thinking you're a chicken shit.
227
00:13:25,038 --> 00:13:27,199
I ain't giving nobody no lap dance
'cause of what you said.
228
00:13:27,273 --> 00:13:29,298
Oh, come on!
It's gonna be funny!
229
00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:32,140
Yeah, everything's funny to you two
when it's happening to me.
230
00:13:32,212 --> 00:13:35,409
Look. You don't have to do it
for anybody you don't want.
231
00:13:35,482 --> 00:13:37,450
I said you'd do it
for the first guy who says it.
232
00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:40,543
So, some geek comes over
trying to be cool,
233
00:13:40,620 --> 00:13:43,521
just tell him you already did it
at another place earlier.
234
00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:47,321
No harm, no foul,
but you get a free drink out of it.
235
00:13:47,394 --> 00:13:49,954
But maybe a little later
in the evening,
236
00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:51,554
you've had a few drinks,
237
00:13:51,631 --> 00:13:53,826
you're kind of loosey-goosey,
238
00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:55,697
you're safe with your girls,
239
00:13:55,769 --> 00:13:58,499
then some kind of cute,
kind of hot, kind of sexy,
240
00:13:58,571 --> 00:14:02,371
hysterically funny, but not-funny-looking guy
comes up and says it...
241
00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:06,538
then maybe you did it earlier,
maybe you didn't.
242
00:14:12,052 --> 00:14:13,610
She's making me trip.
243
00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:18,123
Shut the fuck up.
You made me trip, dumb bitch!
244
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,164
You fuckin' idiot!
245
00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:02,192
# Baby #
246
00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:24,453
# It doesn't matter
what they say #
247
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:28,085
# I know I'm gonna love you
any old way #
248
00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:34,430
# What can I do without you? #
249
00:15:34,501 --> 00:15:39,996
# Don't want nobody, nobody #
250
00:15:40,073 --> 00:15:43,236
# Baby, it's you #
251
00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:49,044
# Baby, it's you #
252
00:15:49,883 --> 00:15:53,717
# Don't leave me alone #
253
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:58,822
# Come on home #
254
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:03,620
# Baby, it's you #
255
00:16:05,165 --> 00:16:08,066
# Baby, it's you... #
256
00:16:10,837 --> 00:16:12,099
Any dead soldiers here?
257
00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:14,197
Uh, these two. Thank you.
258
00:16:16,009 --> 00:16:17,567
Where the hell is Lanna-Frank?
259
00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:20,738
That's a good fucking question.
260
00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:32,553
Lanna-Frank!
261
00:16:33,259 --> 00:16:34,749
Where are you?
262
00:16:36,663 --> 00:16:38,790
Well, come over already.
We're waiting for you.
263
00:16:38,865 --> 00:16:42,130
- Shit! Hold on!
264
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:55,906
So, where are you?
265
00:16:57,083 --> 00:16:59,108
Come over already.
We're waiting for you.
266
00:17:00,086 --> 00:17:02,145
No. We're not coming over there.
267
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:05,385
You come over here
like you said you would.
268
00:17:05,458 --> 00:17:08,450
So, is it Shauna and the girls
at the lake house this weekend?
269
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,996
- Shauna?
- Oh, fuck. I...
270
00:17:11,064 --> 00:17:12,053
No.
271
00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:15,066
Now, there is one thing
that every girl in the whole world
272
00:17:15,134 --> 00:17:17,967
whose name is Shanna
has in common with each other.
273
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,595
We all hate the name "Shauna,"
274
00:17:19,672 --> 00:17:22,106
and we really hate it
when people call us "Shauna."
275
00:17:59,312 --> 00:18:00,574
Just remember...
276
00:18:00,647 --> 00:18:03,309
it's "Shanna Banana,"
not "Shauna Banauna."
277
00:18:03,383 --> 00:18:06,580
Okay, but at some point in the evening,
I had fuckability stock.
278
00:18:06,653 --> 00:18:09,986
Yeah, I mean, it wasn't bullish, but...
279
00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:40,742
Okay... Warren's sending over shots,
and you know the house rules.
280
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:43,516
If he sends over shots,
you gotta do them.
281
00:18:43,589 --> 00:18:45,955
- What?
- Hey, them's the rules, baby.
282
00:18:46,025 --> 00:18:49,552
- Warren says it, we do it!
I love that philosophy!
283
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:52,029
"Warren says it, we do it."
284
00:18:52,098 --> 00:18:54,066
So let's do it!
285
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,191
What is it?
286
00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:59,227
Hey, shot first, questions later.
Here we go. Post time!
287
00:19:00,406 --> 00:19:01,703
Mmm!
288
00:19:04,110 --> 00:19:05,634
Whoo-hoo!
289
00:19:09,282 --> 00:19:13,082
Now, is that a tasty beverage
or is that a tasty beverage?
290
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,414
What the fuck is it?!
291
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:16,079
Chartreuse.
292
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:19,352
The only liquor so good
they named a color after it.
293
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:22,819
Who's down for dos Chartreuse?
294
00:19:22,895 --> 00:19:25,159
Not me.
295
00:19:25,231 --> 00:19:27,028
I'm going out for a smoke.
296
00:19:27,100 --> 00:19:29,500
Okay, but careful where you keep
that hot flame, all right?
297
00:19:29,569 --> 00:19:31,093
You 'll blow up the joint.
298
00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:45,815
Drinks.
What can we get you?
299
00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:46,977
Shanna Banana?
300
00:19:47,053 --> 00:19:49,613
Another big-ass
Long Island iced tea.
301
00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:52,658
Bombay Sapphire
and tonic with no ice.
302
00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:54,454
Good boy.
303
00:20:16,149 --> 00:20:17,138
Oh, hey, Punky.
304
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,980
Uh, one of the lights
is off in the parking lot. Flip it.
305
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,051
- Oh! Jesus Christ!
- Whoa-ho!
306
00:20:57,190 --> 00:20:59,283
You scared the fuck out of me,
you shitty asshole!
307
00:20:59,358 --> 00:21:01,883
I swear, Arlene.
I was not trying to scare you.
308
00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:03,792
I just... got lucky.
309
00:21:03,863 --> 00:21:05,660
Oh, hardee-fucking-har.
310
00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:07,062
- Let's go inside.
- Wait a minute.
311
00:21:07,133 --> 00:21:10,000
- Why?
- I was thinkin' we could make out.
312
00:21:10,069 --> 00:21:11,058
What, on a porch?
313
00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:13,002
Not even in the bar,
but in front of the entrance?
314
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:15,097
- Forget it.
- No, in my car.
315
00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:17,768
What, out there?
It's wet as fucking 'Nam out there.
316
00:21:17,844 --> 00:21:19,436
Not in my car it's not.
317
00:21:20,046 --> 00:21:22,071
Look, you won't get wet.
318
00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:24,309
I promise you.
319
00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,777
You know, most guys
wouldn't brag about that.
320
00:21:28,855 --> 00:21:30,584
Ha ha ha.
321
00:21:30,656 --> 00:21:32,453
I mean...
you know what I mean.
322
00:21:32,525 --> 00:21:34,516
Look, I know you guys
are going to Lake L.B.J.
323
00:21:34,594 --> 00:21:35,925
and we can't come.
324
00:21:37,096 --> 00:21:38,688
I wanna make out...
325
00:21:38,764 --> 00:21:41,562
Okay, just stop with the whining.
It's not attractive.
326
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:51,542
I don't want it super fucking obvious
to everybody in the bar we've been gone,
327
00:21:51,611 --> 00:21:55,206
- so we'll make out for six minutes, deal?
- Great.
328
00:21:55,281 --> 00:21:56,578
No, no, no.
Deal or no deal?
329
00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:58,844
If you're gonna whine
when I pull the plug in six minutes,
330
00:21:58,918 --> 00:22:01,216
we could just walk back
inside the fucking bar right now.
331
00:22:01,287 --> 00:22:02,845
- Deal. No whining.
- And no begging.
332
00:22:02,922 --> 00:22:05,356
And no begging.
When you say "done," it's done.
333
00:22:05,424 --> 00:22:07,392
I'm gonna remember
you said that.
334
00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:08,620
Okay, let's go.
335
00:22:11,063 --> 00:22:14,863
Oh, you got two jobs... kiss good
and make sure my hair don't get wet.
336
00:22:36,389 --> 00:22:39,153
# It was early, early one morning #
337
00:22:39,225 --> 00:22:42,285
# When I heard my bulldog bark #
338
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:45,626
# It was Staggolee and Billy Lyons #
339
00:22:45,698 --> 00:22:47,689
# Squabblin ' in the dark... #
340
00:22:47,767 --> 00:22:50,327
Now, look, you can't look like
you're trying to get her out of here
341
00:22:50,403 --> 00:22:51,768
before Christian Simonson shows up,
342
00:22:51,837 --> 00:22:54,465
but you've got to get her out of here
before Christian Simonson shows up.
343
00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:55,529
Yeah, but what's the point?
344
00:22:55,608 --> 00:22:57,576
They're going to Shanna's
daddy's house at Lake L.B.J.,
345
00:22:57,643 --> 00:22:58,803
and it's no guys.
346
00:22:58,878 --> 00:23:00,436
Absolutely no guys.
347
00:23:00,513 --> 00:23:03,107
Okay. So after we bring
the girls' drinks,
348
00:23:03,182 --> 00:23:07,915
in fairly rapid order, but not obvious,
we order two more rounds of shots.
349
00:23:07,987 --> 00:23:10,455
You think they're gonna fall for that?
350
00:23:10,523 --> 00:23:13,014
We'll be very convincing.
351
00:23:13,526 --> 00:23:15,721
Now it's time to turn up the volume.
No more fucking around.
352
00:23:15,795 --> 00:23:17,353
We go to Jäger shots.
353
00:23:18,030 --> 00:23:20,590
Man, they're not gonna drink Jäger shots.
354
00:23:20,666 --> 00:23:22,156
Dude, as long as
a guy's buying the booze,
355
00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:24,259
a fucking bitch
will drink anything.
356
00:23:24,337 --> 00:23:25,668
Come on, dude, we can
at least get one shot of Jäger
357
00:23:25,738 --> 00:23:27,399
down these
fucking bitches' throats.
358
00:23:27,473 --> 00:23:29,566
After that, we'll see if they get
another Jäger shot in them.
359
00:23:29,642 --> 00:23:30,631
You never know.
360
00:23:30,710 --> 00:23:33,110
That could be the shot
that puts them past the point of "fuck it."
361
00:23:33,179 --> 00:23:34,976
Then all of a sudden
"no guys at the lake house"
362
00:23:35,047 --> 00:23:36,981
turns into a couple of guys
at the lake house.
363
00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:38,516
My point exactly.
364
00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:40,711
And I know I can at least get
"Shanna Suck-my-banana"
365
00:23:40,786 --> 00:23:43,482
to do a fucking Buttery Nipple shot.
What's Julia's sweet shot?
366
00:23:44,490 --> 00:23:46,151
- Key Lime Pie.
- Oh, come on, dude.
367
00:23:46,225 --> 00:23:48,557
Even fucking Leroy Brown
would do one more for dessert.
368
00:23:52,198 --> 00:23:53,893
Dude, check it out.
369
00:23:53,966 --> 00:23:56,025
I wonder if B.J.
brought the bear with him.
370
00:23:58,537 --> 00:23:59,731
Jesus.
371
00:24:03,042 --> 00:24:05,806
Dude fucking cut himself
falling out of his time machine.
372
00:24:07,013 --> 00:24:10,278
Hi, could I get a chicken suit
for Stroker Ace, please?
373
00:24:11,517 --> 00:24:14,645
# See the hole
I shot in his head #
374
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,553
# The high sheriff
told the deputy #
375
00:24:17,623 --> 00:24:20,615
# Get your pistols
and come with me #
376
00:24:20,693 --> 00:24:24,094
# We got to go arrest
a bad man #
377
00:24:24,163 --> 00:24:26,461
# Known as Staggolee... #
378
00:24:30,036 --> 00:24:33,028
# They laid them on the shelf
379
00:24:33,105 --> 00:24:36,131
# If you want
that bad man Staggolee #
380
00:24:36,208 --> 00:24:39,507
# You'll have to arrest him yourself
381
00:24:39,578 --> 00:24:42,172
# The high sheriff
asked the bartender... #
382
00:24:42,248 --> 00:24:44,307
And where did you two disappear to?
383
00:24:44,383 --> 00:24:45,645
I had to get something
out of the car,
384
00:24:45,718 --> 00:24:48,949
and Nate was gentlemanly enough
to escort me with his umbrella.
385
00:24:49,021 --> 00:24:50,886
Ah, good for you, Nate.
386
00:24:50,956 --> 00:24:53,390
You see that pretty girl
sitting by herself at the bar?
387
00:24:56,195 --> 00:24:57,822
Who, the dirty hippie?
388
00:24:57,897 --> 00:24:59,728
Meow. She's not a hippie.
389
00:24:59,799 --> 00:25:00,925
She might as well be a hippie.
390
00:25:02,668 --> 00:25:04,226
Thank you, Timmy boy.
391
00:25:05,337 --> 00:25:07,862
Well, do you know
what just happened to her?
392
00:25:07,940 --> 00:25:10,704
No, but I know she's
a skinny, fake, blonde bitch.
393
00:25:13,212 --> 00:25:15,840
Oh, I'm sorry.
You were telling a story?
394
00:25:15,915 --> 00:25:16,904
What about her?
395
00:25:19,652 --> 00:25:20,778
Hey, Warren!
396
00:25:20,853 --> 00:25:23,981
Is there anybody you could
vouch for to give me a ride home?
397
00:25:25,958 --> 00:25:29,086
Fair lady, your chariot awaits.
398
00:25:29,161 --> 00:25:31,061
You've been eavesdropping?
399
00:25:31,130 --> 00:25:33,792
There's eavesdropping
and "can't help but hear."
400
00:25:33,866 --> 00:25:35,891
I think I belong
in the latter category.
401
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:38,864
So, uh, Icy Hot.
402
00:25:38,938 --> 00:25:41,168
You're offering me a ride home?
403
00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:44,869
I'm offering you a lift if when
I'm ready to leave, you are, too.
404
00:25:44,944 --> 00:25:47,174
And when are you
thinking about leaving?
405
00:25:47,246 --> 00:25:49,111
Truthfully,
I'm not thinking about it.
406
00:25:49,782 --> 00:25:53,183
But when I do,
you will be the first to know.
407
00:25:53,252 --> 00:25:55,618
Will you be able
to, uh, drive later?
408
00:25:55,688 --> 00:25:57,713
I know looks can be deceiving.
409
00:25:59,158 --> 00:26:00,648
But I'm a teetotaler.
410
00:26:00,726 --> 00:26:02,853
I've been drinking
club soda and lime all night,
411
00:26:02,928 --> 00:26:04,919
and now I'm building up
to my big drink.
412
00:26:04,997 --> 00:26:09,297
- Which is what?
- Virgin piña colada.
413
00:26:10,136 --> 00:26:13,037
Okay. Why would
someone who doesn't drink
414
00:26:13,105 --> 00:26:15,972
spend hours at a bar drinking water?
415
00:26:16,041 --> 00:26:19,704
You know, a bar offers
all kind of things other than alcohol.
416
00:26:19,779 --> 00:26:22,270
Mmm. Really?
417
00:26:22,348 --> 00:26:23,713
Like what?
418
00:26:25,818 --> 00:26:26,944
Women.
419
00:26:27,019 --> 00:26:29,487
Nacho grande platters.
420
00:26:29,555 --> 00:26:32,115
The fellowship
of some fascinating individuals,
421
00:26:32,191 --> 00:26:33,283
like Warren here.
422
00:26:34,593 --> 00:26:36,185
Alcohol is just a lubricant
423
00:26:36,262 --> 00:26:39,629
for all the individual
encounters that a barroom offers.
424
00:26:39,698 --> 00:26:42,166
Ooh. Is that cowboy wisdom?
425
00:26:42,234 --> 00:26:44,168
I'm not a cowboy, Pam.
426
00:26:45,671 --> 00:26:46,831
I'm a stuntman.
427
00:26:46,906 --> 00:26:51,275
But that's a very
easy mistake to make.
428
00:26:51,343 --> 00:26:53,334
How do you know my name?
429
00:26:53,412 --> 00:26:56,540
When you were talking with Warren...
430
00:26:56,615 --> 00:26:57,946
couldn't help but overhear.
431
00:26:59,752 --> 00:27:00,741
Fair enough.
432
00:27:00,820 --> 00:27:02,447
So what's your name, Icy?
433
00:27:03,789 --> 00:27:05,222
Stuntman Mike.
434
00:27:06,225 --> 00:27:07,749
Stuntman Mike's your name?
435
00:27:07,827 --> 00:27:10,625
Tsk. You ask anybody.
436
00:27:11,897 --> 00:27:13,194
Hey, Warren.
437
00:27:13,265 --> 00:27:14,630
Who is this guy?
438
00:27:14,700 --> 00:27:16,531
Stuntman Mike.
439
00:27:16,602 --> 00:27:18,627
And who the hell
is Stuntman Mike?
440
00:27:18,704 --> 00:27:19,932
He's a stuntman.
441
00:27:20,005 --> 00:27:22,838
Warren! Six shots of Wild Turkey!
442
00:27:22,908 --> 00:27:25,536
# I' ve just got to know #
443
00:27:25,611 --> 00:27:27,408
# Should I go leave #
444
00:27:28,113 --> 00:27:32,174
# And find somebody else #
445
00:27:32,251 --> 00:27:36,017
# You know I stood yesterday #
446
00:27:36,088 --> 00:27:37,453
Yeah!
447
00:27:38,591 --> 00:27:39,751
Yeah!
448
00:27:42,862 --> 00:27:43,851
Let's do 'em!
449
00:27:43,929 --> 00:27:45,590
Salud.
450
00:27:45,664 --> 00:27:47,393
Down the snatch.
451
00:27:47,466 --> 00:27:50,958
You know, Pam,
I think it's time for my big drink.
452
00:27:51,971 --> 00:27:55,600
Well, Stuntman Mike,
since I have a tab here,
453
00:27:55,674 --> 00:27:57,801
can I buy you that
virgin piña colada?
454
00:27:57,877 --> 00:28:00,072
Thank you, Pam.
That'd be lovely.
455
00:28:00,145 --> 00:28:01,612
Warren!
456
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,808
A, uh, virgin piña colada
for my stuntman friend
457
00:28:04,884 --> 00:28:07,512
and I'll have another
Cadillac Cabo Wabo margarita.
458
00:28:07,586 --> 00:28:09,315
Cabo Wabo, virgin.
459
00:28:41,353 --> 00:28:43,821
# People, I've been misled #
460
00:28:45,357 --> 00:28:49,054
# And I've been afraid #
461
00:28:50,362 --> 00:28:53,229
# I've been hit in the head #
462
00:28:53,299 --> 00:28:56,359
# And left for days #
463
00:28:57,069 --> 00:28:59,435
# I've been abused #
464
00:29:00,806 --> 00:29:03,639
# And I've been accused #
465
00:29:04,510 --> 00:29:07,968
# I've been refused #
466
00:29:08,047 --> 00:29:09,639
# A piece of bread... #
467
00:29:10,482 --> 00:29:13,280
- Ah!
- Hey, if it ain't Lanna-Frank.
468
00:29:13,352 --> 00:29:14,614
Mwah.
469
00:29:14,687 --> 00:29:16,018
- Hey, baby.
- How are you?
470
00:29:16,088 --> 00:29:17,385
- # In my life before #
- Hey, what's up?
471
00:29:17,456 --> 00:29:18,718
Hey!
472
00:29:18,791 --> 00:29:21,419
Hey, what's shakin', bacon?
473
00:29:21,493 --> 00:29:23,461
Hey.
474
00:29:23,529 --> 00:29:26,362
# Go wrong as I do today #
475
00:29:26,432 --> 00:29:29,401
- # I want you to stop... #
- Well, let's scootch over, now.
476
00:29:29,468 --> 00:29:31,436
It's about fucking time.
477
00:29:31,503 --> 00:29:33,801
Well, beggars can't be choosers.
478
00:29:34,406 --> 00:29:36,499
Take a picture.
It lasts longer.
479
00:29:37,776 --> 00:29:38,936
What?
480
00:29:39,011 --> 00:29:40,137
That table.
481
00:29:40,212 --> 00:29:42,112
Seems to keep,
um, getting your attention.
482
00:29:42,181 --> 00:29:44,672
Is that the girl
from the billboard outside?
483
00:29:44,750 --> 00:29:45,739
Yep.
484
00:29:45,818 --> 00:29:48,981
She sure is a striking-looking woman.
485
00:29:49,054 --> 00:29:50,988
It's got gin, tequila, Jäger...
486
00:29:51,056 --> 00:29:52,045
Look at that hair.
487
00:29:52,124 --> 00:29:53,523
Lots of leave-in conditioner.
488
00:29:55,060 --> 00:29:57,051
Is that jealousy I detect?
489
00:29:57,129 --> 00:30:01,088
Hardly. But if you want
to get with, uh, Jungle Julia,
490
00:30:01,166 --> 00:30:02,997
there's a real easy way to do that.
491
00:30:03,068 --> 00:30:04,626
Really, what would that be?
492
00:30:04,703 --> 00:30:08,139
Get famous. You won't have
to find her... she'll find you.
493
00:30:08,207 --> 00:30:11,574
And you don't even want to know
what she did for that billboard.
494
00:30:11,643 --> 00:30:13,167
Enjoy it, cocksucker.
495
00:30:13,245 --> 00:30:14,678
You've earned it.
496
00:30:14,747 --> 00:30:16,681
What did she ever do to you?
497
00:30:16,749 --> 00:30:19,411
We went to school together
from kindergarten through high school.
498
00:30:19,485 --> 00:30:21,419
That's what she did to me.
499
00:30:21,487 --> 00:30:24,081
She was her height right now at 12.
500
00:30:24,156 --> 00:30:25,987
She was a monster.
501
00:30:26,058 --> 00:30:29,960
Half the guys she still fucks
she used to terrorize in the fifth grade.
502
00:30:30,029 --> 00:30:32,827
And she used to beat you up
and take your chocolate milk, huh?
503
00:30:32,898 --> 00:30:34,422
That pituitary case?
504
00:30:34,500 --> 00:30:36,195
Might have kicked my ass
a couple of times...
505
00:30:36,268 --> 00:30:39,101
sorry, I'm built like a girl,
not a black man...
506
00:30:39,171 --> 00:30:42,834
but I'd die before I ever gave
Julia Lucai my chocolate milk.
507
00:31:14,473 --> 00:31:18,204
Hey! Are you
famous or somethin'?
508
00:31:18,277 --> 00:31:19,642
Or somethin'.
509
00:31:19,711 --> 00:31:21,076
No, no, no. Really.
510
00:31:22,247 --> 00:31:24,078
Hey, what do... what do you do?
511
00:31:24,983 --> 00:31:26,280
Really?
512
00:31:26,351 --> 00:31:30,253
What I do is work my ass off to get
my own record label off the ground,
513
00:31:30,322 --> 00:31:34,816
but why that girl wanted a picture of me
is because I'm a local D.J.
514
00:31:37,296 --> 00:31:38,729
Wait a minute.
515
00:31:40,032 --> 00:31:43,559
You've got a billboard
by Big Kahuna Burger, don't you?
516
00:31:43,635 --> 00:31:45,102
Yeah.
517
00:31:45,170 --> 00:31:47,570
I got one there, too, Zatoichi.
518
00:31:50,409 --> 00:31:51,637
Yeah.
519
00:31:53,345 --> 00:31:54,937
Jungle Julia Lucai.
520
00:31:55,013 --> 00:31:56,947
Stuntman Mike McKay.
521
00:31:57,015 --> 00:31:58,380
Well.
522
00:31:58,450 --> 00:32:01,544
Good to meet you, Stuntman Mike.
523
00:32:01,620 --> 00:32:03,952
My friends and I are going
to continue to get our weed on.
524
00:32:04,022 --> 00:32:05,284
Would you care for some?
525
00:32:05,357 --> 00:32:06,790
Thank you, Julia,
526
00:32:06,859 --> 00:32:09,726
but just the same...
no thanks.
527
00:32:09,795 --> 00:32:11,319
- Suit yourself.
- But you know...
528
00:32:21,406 --> 00:32:23,340
Oh, shit.
529
00:32:23,408 --> 00:32:24,568
Ah! My God.
530
00:32:27,379 --> 00:32:28,539
Sorry. It's nothing.
531
00:32:32,151 --> 00:32:33,516
What the fuck was that?
532
00:32:38,090 --> 00:32:39,955
You got some voucher here.
533
00:32:40,025 --> 00:32:41,686
I asked him
what movies you worked on.
534
00:32:41,760 --> 00:32:43,455
No fuckin' clue.
535
00:32:43,529 --> 00:32:46,760
Well, technically I really don't know
if he's ever done anything for sure.
536
00:32:46,832 --> 00:32:49,801
I mean, he shows me
an episode of High Chaparral,
537
00:32:49,868 --> 00:32:51,267
a guy falls off a horse,
538
00:32:51,336 --> 00:32:52,428
he says it's him.
539
00:32:54,206 --> 00:32:56,436
You know the show The Virginian?
540
00:32:58,143 --> 00:33:00,839
Yeah, well, there was another
actor on that show, Gary Clarke,
541
00:33:00,913 --> 00:33:02,778
and I looked like him a bit...
542
00:33:02,848 --> 00:33:06,011
well, obviously
before I cut myself shaving.
543
00:33:06,084 --> 00:33:08,052
Tsk. Aww, I like it.
544
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:12,352
Well, damn, if you ain't so sweet
you make sugar taste just like salt.
545
00:33:12,424 --> 00:33:15,860
Anyway, I did a lot of Virginians
doubling Gary Clarke.
546
00:33:15,928 --> 00:33:19,659
And, uh... then that show turned
into The Men of Shiloh,
547
00:33:19,731 --> 00:33:22,461
they brought on Lee Majors,
and I doubled him.
548
00:33:22,534 --> 00:33:25,799
From that point on
I specialized mostly in car stunts.
549
00:33:25,871 --> 00:33:29,432
Yeah, I did damn near
the whole third season of Vega$.
550
00:33:29,508 --> 00:33:31,738
I was Robert Urich's driving double.
551
00:33:31,810 --> 00:33:34,677
And then Bob
did another show, Gavilan.
552
00:33:34,746 --> 00:33:37,237
and he brought me
with him on that, till...
553
00:33:39,017 --> 00:33:40,279
And after that...
554
00:33:44,456 --> 00:33:47,823
Do you know any of these shows
or people I'm talkin' about?
555
00:33:47,893 --> 00:33:49,258
Sorry.
556
00:33:49,328 --> 00:33:50,317
- No?
- Mm-mm.
557
00:33:50,395 --> 00:33:52,056
No, no.
558
00:33:54,633 --> 00:33:59,866
So how exactly does one
become a stuntman, Stuntman Mike?
559
00:34:02,107 --> 00:34:06,271
Well, in Hollywood, anybody fool enough
to throw himself down a flight of stairs
560
00:34:06,345 --> 00:34:09,075
can usually find somebody
to pay him for it.
561
00:34:09,147 --> 00:34:12,776
But really I got into the business the way
most people get into the stunt business.
562
00:34:12,851 --> 00:34:14,113
How's that?
563
00:34:14,186 --> 00:34:16,677
- My brother got me in it.
- Well, who's your brother?
564
00:34:16,755 --> 00:34:18,120
Stuntman Bob.
565
00:34:31,670 --> 00:34:32,864
I'm ready to blaze!
566
00:34:32,938 --> 00:34:35,805
Finally, yeah.
You need to catch up with us.
567
00:34:35,874 --> 00:34:38,138
- Now the party can start.
- Yep.
568
00:34:38,210 --> 00:34:41,543
Anywho, I'm sorry.
You forgive me?
569
00:34:43,015 --> 00:34:47,281
But you have to be real nice to me
for the whole rest of the time I'm here.
570
00:34:47,352 --> 00:34:49,513
Promise.
You ready to go to the lake?
571
00:34:49,588 --> 00:34:50,577
Mm-hmm.
572
00:34:50,656 --> 00:34:53,420
- How about your friend, bring him?
- I thought no boys.
573
00:34:53,492 --> 00:34:55,722
If you really want him to come,
Shanna won't mind.
574
00:34:55,794 --> 00:34:58,388
So how about it?
Boys or just us girls?
575
00:34:58,463 --> 00:35:00,158
Mmm, us girls.
576
00:35:00,232 --> 00:35:01,529
Good idea.
577
00:35:03,435 --> 00:35:04,527
Ladies?
578
00:35:06,905 --> 00:35:07,894
Thanks.
579
00:35:09,074 --> 00:35:10,803
Cheers, Butterfly.
580
00:35:13,211 --> 00:35:17,511
"The woods are lovely,
dark, and deep...
581
00:35:17,582 --> 00:35:19,345
"And I have promises to keep,
582
00:35:19,418 --> 00:35:22,819
And miles to go
before I sleep."
583
00:35:22,888 --> 00:35:24,856
Did you hear me, Butterfly?
584
00:35:25,957 --> 00:35:29,859
"Miles to go
before you sleep."
585
00:35:31,763 --> 00:35:33,253
Sorry, Stuntman Burt...
586
00:35:33,332 --> 00:35:34,492
Mike.
587
00:35:34,666 --> 00:35:35,963
Mike.
588
00:35:36,034 --> 00:35:38,025
She already broke off that dance.
589
00:35:38,103 --> 00:35:39,593
Is that true?
590
00:35:41,273 --> 00:35:43,867
Did I miss my chance?
591
00:35:46,611 --> 00:35:48,636
Do I frighten you?
592
00:35:53,085 --> 00:35:54,950
Is it my scar?
593
00:35:57,122 --> 00:35:58,851
It's your car.
594
00:35:58,924 --> 00:36:00,983
Ah, yeah, I know.
595
00:36:01,059 --> 00:36:03,220
Sorry.
596
00:36:03,295 --> 00:36:05,126
It's my mom's car.
597
00:36:07,566 --> 00:36:09,261
Have you been following us?
598
00:36:09,334 --> 00:36:12,030
No, but that's
what I love about Austin...
599
00:36:12,104 --> 00:36:14,368
it's just so damn small.
600
00:36:14,439 --> 00:36:17,067
- You've seen this guy before?
- I saw him outside of Guero's.
601
00:36:17,142 --> 00:36:19,542
And I saw you outside Guero's, too.
602
00:36:20,846 --> 00:36:23,440
You saw my car,
I saw your legs.
603
00:36:23,515 --> 00:36:26,848
Now, look, I ain't stalking y'all,
but I didn't say I wasn't a wolf.
604
00:36:26,918 --> 00:36:28,886
So you really weren't following us?
605
00:36:28,954 --> 00:36:32,788
I'm not following you, Butterfly.
I just... got lucky.
606
00:36:35,060 --> 00:36:39,360
So, how about that lap dance?
607
00:36:39,431 --> 00:36:41,160
Sorry, it was a one-time only offer,
608
00:36:41,233 --> 00:36:43,599
and she did it
earlier this evening at Antone's.
609
00:36:45,070 --> 00:36:47,095
- No, she didn't.
- How do you know?
610
00:36:47,172 --> 00:36:49,197
I'm good that way.
611
00:36:49,274 --> 00:36:53,074
- Tsk. And you look a little touchéd.
- What's "touchéd"?
612
00:36:53,145 --> 00:36:54,339
Wounded, slightly.
613
00:36:54,413 --> 00:36:55,675
Why should I be wounded?
614
00:36:55,747 --> 00:36:58,716
Because you expected guys
to be pestering you all night,
615
00:36:58,784 --> 00:37:01,548
but from your look I can tell
nobody pestered you at all.
616
00:37:02,788 --> 00:37:05,222
That kind of hurt your feelings
a little bit, didn't it?
617
00:37:06,825 --> 00:37:12,195
There are few things as fetching
as a bruised ego on a beautiful angel.
618
00:37:15,967 --> 00:37:16,956
So...
619
00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:22,070
How about that lap dance?
620
00:37:23,275 --> 00:37:25,903
I think I'm going
to have to give you a rain check.
621
00:37:28,780 --> 00:37:31,010
Well, since you'll be leaving
in the next couple of days,
622
00:37:31,082 --> 00:37:33,073
that rain check'll be worthless.
623
00:37:35,353 --> 00:37:36,377
But that's okay.
624
00:37:38,256 --> 00:37:40,520
I understand
if I make you uncomfortable.
625
00:37:41,359 --> 00:37:43,190
You're still a nice girl.
626
00:37:43,261 --> 00:37:45,058
And I still like you.
627
00:37:46,465 --> 00:37:48,626
But I must warn you of something.
628
00:37:49,835 --> 00:37:52,326
You know how people say,
629
00:37:52,404 --> 00:37:54,099
"You're okay in my book,"
630
00:37:54,172 --> 00:37:57,437
or, "In my book, that's no good."
631
00:37:57,509 --> 00:38:03,175
Well, I actually have a book.
632
00:38:03,248 --> 00:38:07,150
And everybody
I ever meet goes in this book.
633
00:38:07,219 --> 00:38:11,622
And now I've met you,
and you're goin' in the book.
634
00:38:13,091 --> 00:38:14,888
Except...
635
00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:19,090
I'm afraid I must file you...
636
00:38:19,164 --> 00:38:21,098
under...
637
00:38:21,166 --> 00:38:22,690
"Chicken Shit."
638
00:38:22,767 --> 00:38:25,065
And what if I did it?
639
00:38:25,136 --> 00:38:27,400
Well, I definitely couldn't
file you under "Chicken Shit,"
640
00:38:27,472 --> 00:38:29,565
then, now, could I?
641
00:38:29,641 --> 00:38:30,938
What's your name again?
642
00:38:32,344 --> 00:38:35,245
- Stuntman Mike.
- Well, Stuntman Mike...
643
00:38:35,313 --> 00:38:36,871
I'm Butterfly.
644
00:38:36,948 --> 00:38:41,476
My friend Jungle Julia over here says
that jukebox inside is pretty impressive.
645
00:38:41,553 --> 00:38:43,282
Yeah, it is.
646
00:38:43,355 --> 00:38:44,344
Yeah.
647
00:38:45,390 --> 00:38:47,654
Well, why don't you go
get ready for your lap dance?
648
00:39:01,740 --> 00:39:04,766
What about "kind of cute,
kind of hot, kind of sexy,
649
00:39:04,843 --> 00:39:06,674
"hysterically funny
but not funny-looking guy
650
00:39:06,745 --> 00:39:09,578
who you could fuck"
did you not understand?
651
00:39:22,394 --> 00:39:26,660
# Aah, aah #
652
00:39:27,265 --> 00:39:31,668
# Aah, aah #
653
00:39:31,736 --> 00:39:36,696
# Now, down in Mexicali #
654
00:39:36,775 --> 00:39:41,303
# There's a pretty
little place that I love #
655
00:39:41,379 --> 00:39:46,442
# Where the drinks
are hotter than the chili sauce #
656
00:39:46,518 --> 00:39:51,285
# And the boss is a cat named Joe #
657
00:39:51,356 --> 00:39:54,018
# He wears a red bandanna #
658
00:39:54,092 --> 00:39:56,526
# Plays a cool piano #
659
00:39:56,595 --> 00:40:01,157
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
660
00:40:01,232 --> 00:40:04,258
# He wears a purple sash #
661
00:40:04,336 --> 00:40:06,634
# And a black moustache #
662
00:40:06,705 --> 00:40:10,971
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
663
00:40:11,042 --> 00:40:12,031
# Well #
664
00:40:12,110 --> 00:40:16,069
# The first time that I saw him #
665
00:40:16,147 --> 00:40:20,948
# He was a-sitting on a piano stool #
666
00:40:21,019 --> 00:40:26,013
# I said, "Tell me, then,
when does the fun begin?" #
667
00:40:26,091 --> 00:40:30,687
# He just winked his eye
and said, "Man, be cool" #
668
00:40:30,762 --> 00:40:33,458
# He wears a red bandanna #
669
00:40:33,531 --> 00:40:36,056
# Plays a blues piano #
670
00:40:36,134 --> 00:40:40,366
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
671
00:40:40,438 --> 00:40:43,430
# He wears a purple sash #
672
00:40:43,508 --> 00:40:45,942
# And a black moustache #
673
00:40:46,011 --> 00:40:50,209
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
674
00:40:50,281 --> 00:40:51,270
# In Mexico #
675
00:40:51,349 --> 00:40:54,682
# All of a sudden, in walks a chick #
676
00:40:54,753 --> 00:40:55,845
# In Mexico #
677
00:40:55,920 --> 00:40:58,980
# Joe starts playing on a Latin kick #
678
00:40:59,057 --> 00:41:00,046
# In Mexico #
679
00:41:00,125 --> 00:41:03,288
# Around her waist
she wore three fishnets #
680
00:41:03,361 --> 00:41:04,555
# In Mexico #
681
00:41:04,629 --> 00:41:07,223
# She started dancing
with the castanets #
682
00:41:07,298 --> 00:41:08,663
# In Mexico #
683
00:41:08,733 --> 00:41:11,793
# I didn't know just what to expect #
684
00:41:11,870 --> 00:41:12,859
# In Mexico #
685
00:41:12,937 --> 00:41:15,906
# She threw her arms
around my neck #
686
00:41:15,974 --> 00:41:16,963
# In Mexico #
687
00:41:17,042 --> 00:41:19,806
# We started dancing
all around the floor #
688
00:41:19,878 --> 00:41:20,936
# In Mexico #
689
00:41:21,012 --> 00:41:24,607
# And then she did a dance
I never saw before #
690
00:41:24,683 --> 00:41:29,211
# So if you're south of the border #
691
00:41:29,287 --> 00:41:33,724
# I mean a-down in a-Mexico #
692
00:41:33,792 --> 00:41:38,491
# And you wanna get straight,
man, don't hesitate #
693
00:41:38,563 --> 00:41:42,863
# Just look up a cat named Joe #
694
00:41:42,934 --> 00:41:45,164
# He wears a red bandanna #
695
00:41:45,236 --> 00:41:47,864
# Plays a blues piano #
696
00:41:47,939 --> 00:41:52,467
# In a honky-tonk down in Mexico #
697
00:41:52,544 --> 00:41:54,842
# He wears a purple sash #
698
00:41:54,913 --> 00:41:57,507
# And a black moustache #
699
00:41:57,582 --> 00:41:59,049
# In a honky... #
700
00:42:00,885 --> 00:42:02,147
I'm driving.
701
00:42:02,220 --> 00:42:05,348
We're gonna go somewhere else,
gonna go hang out.
702
00:42:05,423 --> 00:42:06,412
Ready to go?
703
00:42:06,491 --> 00:42:07,685
Yeah.
704
00:42:07,759 --> 00:42:09,522
- Bye.
Bye.
705
00:42:12,797 --> 00:42:15,027
I think you got Mike laid tonight.
706
00:42:16,634 --> 00:42:18,795
Lookin' good, Cannonball Run!
707
00:42:19,938 --> 00:42:21,872
He's just giving me a ride.
708
00:42:21,940 --> 00:42:22,964
Oh, no doubt.
709
00:42:23,041 --> 00:42:25,339
Have a nice ride!
710
00:42:26,745 --> 00:42:28,610
Look, double fucks.
711
00:42:32,951 --> 00:42:34,919
I am not gonna fuck him.
712
00:42:34,986 --> 00:42:36,419
I can hear you.
713
00:42:37,856 --> 00:42:41,348
- He's old enough to be my dad.
- I can still hear you.
714
00:42:44,596 --> 00:42:45,756
Bye.
715
00:42:45,830 --> 00:42:46,888
Bye-bye!
716
00:42:53,271 --> 00:42:55,239
Wow, that's fucking scary.
717
00:42:55,306 --> 00:42:57,331
Yeah, well, I wanted it
to be impressive and...
718
00:42:57,408 --> 00:42:59,433
scary tends to impress.
719
00:43:00,879 --> 00:43:02,039
Is it safe?
720
00:43:02,113 --> 00:43:04,081
No, it's better than safe.
721
00:43:04,149 --> 00:43:05,776
It's death-proof.
722
00:43:05,850 --> 00:43:08,375
How do you make a car death-proof?
723
00:43:08,453 --> 00:43:10,250
Well, that's what stuntmen do.
724
00:43:10,321 --> 00:43:12,949
You've seen a movie where
a car gets into some smash-up
725
00:43:13,024 --> 00:43:15,458
there ain't no way in hell
anybody's walking away from?
726
00:43:15,527 --> 00:43:16,516
Yeah.
727
00:43:16,594 --> 00:43:19,085
Well, how do you
think they accomplish that?
728
00:43:19,164 --> 00:43:21,189
CGI?
729
00:43:21,266 --> 00:43:25,202
Well, unfortunately, Pam, nowadays
more often than not, you're right.
730
00:43:25,270 --> 00:43:27,534
Tsk. But back
in the all-or-nothin' days...
731
00:43:27,605 --> 00:43:31,405
Vanishing Point days,
the Dirty Mary Crazy Larry days,
732
00:43:31,476 --> 00:43:33,137
the White Line Fever days...
733
00:43:33,211 --> 00:43:36,180
real cars smashing into real cars.
734
00:43:36,247 --> 00:43:38,875
Real dumb people driving 'em.
735
00:43:38,950 --> 00:43:41,976
So, give the stunt team
the car you want to smash up,
736
00:43:42,053 --> 00:43:44,613
they take her and reinforce
that fucker everywhere and...
737
00:43:44,689 --> 00:43:45,678
Voila!
738
00:43:45,757 --> 00:43:49,193
You got yourself
a death-proof automobile.
739
00:43:50,728 --> 00:43:54,323
That makes sense. I just didn't know
you could make a car death-proof.
740
00:43:54,399 --> 00:43:58,199
Well, I can drive this baby into
a brick wall doing 125 miles an hour.
741
00:43:59,037 --> 00:44:00,470
Just for the experience.
742
00:44:07,212 --> 00:44:09,442
Why is your passenger seat in a box?
743
00:44:09,514 --> 00:44:11,038
Well, this is a movie car.
744
00:44:11,115 --> 00:44:14,642
Sometimes when you're shootin' a crash,
director wants to put a camera in the car...
745
00:44:14,719 --> 00:44:16,880
you know, shoot the crash
from the inside.
746
00:44:16,955 --> 00:44:19,890
That's where you put the camera.
They call it a "crash box."
747
00:44:22,627 --> 00:44:24,288
There you go.
748
00:44:24,362 --> 00:44:26,660
You know, when you
asked to drive me home,
749
00:44:26,731 --> 00:44:28,631
you didn't mention your car
didn't have a passenger seat.
750
00:44:28,700 --> 00:44:31,692
Yeah, well, actually,
I didn't ask to drive you home.
751
00:44:31,769 --> 00:44:33,669
You asked me for a ride,
and I said, "Yes."
752
00:44:33,738 --> 00:44:35,069
But look at the bright side, Pam...
753
00:44:35,139 --> 00:44:38,108
I won't be gettin' fresh,
putting my hand on your knee.
754
00:44:39,911 --> 00:44:41,708
That is a bright side.
755
00:44:42,747 --> 00:44:43,907
I thought so.
756
00:45:09,941 --> 00:45:11,340
Well, Pam...
757
00:45:11,409 --> 00:45:12,671
which way are you going?
758
00:45:12,744 --> 00:45:14,575
- Left or right?
- Right.
759
00:45:14,646 --> 00:45:16,614
Ah, that's too bad.
760
00:45:17,282 --> 00:45:18,306
Why?
761
00:45:18,383 --> 00:45:22,251
Well, because it was a 50/50 shot
on whether you 'd be going left or right.
762
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:24,447
You see, we're both going left.
763
00:45:24,522 --> 00:45:26,513
You could have just
as easily been going left, too,
764
00:45:26,591 --> 00:45:27,888
and if that was the case,
765
00:45:27,959 --> 00:45:30,621
it would have been a while
before you started getting scared.
766
00:45:30,695 --> 00:45:33,061
But since
you're going the other way,
767
00:45:33,131 --> 00:45:34,689
I'm afraid...
768
00:45:34,766 --> 00:45:38,167
you're gonna
have to start getting scared...
769
00:45:38,236 --> 00:45:39,294
immediately.
770
00:45:39,370 --> 00:45:40,462
What the fuck?!
771
00:45:49,981 --> 00:45:51,812
Cocksucking motherfucker!
772
00:45:51,883 --> 00:45:53,475
Just fucking let me out of here!
773
00:45:53,551 --> 00:45:55,109
I'll fucking rip your fucking...
774
00:45:55,186 --> 00:45:56,585
Stop the fucking car!
775
00:45:56,654 --> 00:45:58,485
Why are you being such a shit?
776
00:46:38,763 --> 00:46:40,560
Okay.
777
00:46:40,631 --> 00:46:42,030
Here's the thing.
778
00:46:42,100 --> 00:46:44,193
I get it.
779
00:46:44,268 --> 00:46:46,964
I... I know it's a joke,
and super funny.
780
00:46:47,772 --> 00:46:51,538
Um, but if you just stop right now,
781
00:46:51,609 --> 00:46:54,009
you know, and... and let me out,
782
00:46:54,078 --> 00:46:57,445
I'll never tell anybody
because I know it's a joke.
783
00:46:57,515 --> 00:46:58,846
I know all about jokes.
784
00:46:58,916 --> 00:47:00,349
Ha ha ha!
785
00:47:00,418 --> 00:47:03,854
I promise everything'll be fine.
786
00:47:03,921 --> 00:47:06,412
Just... just... just let me out.
787
00:47:06,491 --> 00:47:07,480
Please?
788
00:47:07,558 --> 00:47:09,321
- And... and... and...
- Hey, Pam!
789
00:47:10,395 --> 00:47:13,887
Remember when I said
this car was death proof?
790
00:47:13,965 --> 00:47:17,230
Well, that wasn't a lie.
791
00:47:17,301 --> 00:47:19,895
This car is 100% death proof.
792
00:47:20,805 --> 00:47:23,774
Only to get the benefit of it, honey...
793
00:47:23,841 --> 00:47:26,833
you really need to be sittin' in my seat.
794
00:48:04,282 --> 00:48:07,877
Now I gotta catch me
my other girlfriends.
795
00:48:22,366 --> 00:48:23,355
No, no, no, no, no, no.
796
00:48:23,434 --> 00:48:26,665
It's Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick and Tich.
797
00:48:27,572 --> 00:48:29,130
So, you got it?
798
00:48:29,207 --> 00:48:32,074
Thanks, honey.
You're gonna play it next song, right?
799
00:48:33,311 --> 00:48:35,176
Good boy.
800
00:48:36,647 --> 00:48:38,308
Growl!
801
00:48:38,382 --> 00:48:40,441
Bye-bye.
802
00:48:40,518 --> 00:48:41,951
Who do you want to hear?
803
00:48:42,019 --> 00:48:43,919
Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick, and Tich.
804
00:48:43,988 --> 00:48:45,250
Who?
805
00:48:45,323 --> 00:48:48,952
Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick, and Tich.
806
00:48:49,026 --> 00:48:50,425
Who the fuck are they?
807
00:48:50,495 --> 00:48:53,293
For your information,
Pete Townshend, at one point,
808
00:48:53,364 --> 00:48:55,127
almost quit The Who,
and if he had,
809
00:48:55,199 --> 00:48:56,860
he would have ended up in this group,
810
00:48:56,934 --> 00:49:00,665
thus making it Dave Dee, Dozy,
Beaky, Mick, Tich, and Pete.
811
00:49:00,738 --> 00:49:02,296
And if you ask me,
he should have.
812
00:49:03,441 --> 00:49:05,773
That's my boy!
813
00:49:18,856 --> 00:49:20,790
# Hold tight, count to three #
814
00:49:20,858 --> 00:49:22,917
# Gotta stay close by me #
815
00:49:22,994 --> 00:49:24,757
# And hold tight, sing and shout #
816
00:49:24,829 --> 00:49:26,694
# Just ride my roundabout #
817
00:49:26,764 --> 00:49:28,755
# And hold tight, shut your eyes #
818
00:49:28,833 --> 00:49:33,930
# Girl, you suit me for size... #
819
00:49:34,005 --> 00:49:37,771
# Forget the other guys #
820
00:49:37,842 --> 00:49:41,278
# You'll never fall
each time you call #
821
00:49:41,345 --> 00:49:45,213
# Hold tight, hold tight #
822
00:49:45,283 --> 00:49:51,051
# Hold tight... #
823
00:49:51,122 --> 00:49:55,218
# Hold tight, make me feel,
what you say is for real #
824
00:49:55,293 --> 00:49:57,158
# And hold tight, carousel #
825
00:49:57,228 --> 00:49:58,820
# Girl, you'll soon ring my bell #
826
00:49:58,896 --> 00:50:00,989
# And hold tight, we will fly #
827
00:50:01,065 --> 00:50:06,162
# Swinging low, swinging high... #
828
00:50:06,237 --> 00:50:10,071
# We're gonna make the sky #
829
00:50:10,141 --> 00:50:11,972
# You'll never fall #
830
00:50:54,418 --> 00:50:56,852
I want to hear
this part of the song louder!
831
00:51:44,268 --> 00:51:45,929
Do you remember anything?
832
00:51:47,872 --> 00:51:50,170
Uh... I... I don't remember.
833
00:51:53,744 --> 00:51:55,177
Doctor Block.
834
00:52:02,053 --> 00:52:04,647
Self-restraints to Room 310.
835
00:52:04,722 --> 00:52:07,122
Self-restraints to Room 310.
836
00:52:08,326 --> 00:52:13,628
Well. What's the patient's
prognosis, Dr. Block?
837
00:52:13,698 --> 00:52:15,928
I don't really see
it's any of your business.
838
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:17,831
Come on now, Sis.
839
00:52:17,902 --> 00:52:20,200
You just tell us.
840
00:52:20,271 --> 00:52:21,602
How bad is he?
841
00:52:26,277 --> 00:52:28,006
He got banged up real good.
842
00:52:28,079 --> 00:52:32,482
Busted nose, broken collarbone,
smashed up his left index finger.
843
00:52:32,550 --> 00:52:33,744
Is that it?
844
00:52:35,553 --> 00:52:37,282
He was real lucky.
845
00:52:39,490 --> 00:52:41,253
That'll be all?
846
00:52:41,325 --> 00:52:44,624
Well, that's more than enough,
and I wanna thank you, Dr. Block.
847
00:52:48,466 --> 00:52:49,956
Son of a bitch.
848
00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:53,094
So, Pop.
849
00:52:53,170 --> 00:52:54,694
What do you think?
850
00:52:54,772 --> 00:52:56,603
Well, Son Number One,
851
00:52:56,674 --> 00:53:00,838
what I think is so goddamn ghoulish
I hesitate to speak it out loud.
852
00:53:01,879 --> 00:53:04,143
Well, give it a shot.
853
00:53:04,215 --> 00:53:07,241
Well, what we have here
is a case of vehicular homicide.
854
00:53:07,318 --> 00:53:10,048
That ol' boy in there
murdered them pretty little gals.
855
00:53:10,121 --> 00:53:13,887
I mean, he used a car, not a hatchet,
but they're dead just the same.
856
00:53:15,459 --> 00:53:18,485
Well, what are you gonna do?
857
00:53:18,562 --> 00:53:20,257
Not a goddamn thing.
858
00:53:20,331 --> 00:53:22,595
D.A. says there ain't no crime here.
859
00:53:23,501 --> 00:53:28,438
Every one of them gals was swimming
in alcohol and floatin' on weed,
860
00:53:28,506 --> 00:53:32,374
and old Hooper in there
came out clean as a whistle.
861
00:53:32,443 --> 00:53:36,846
Now, you actually think that he
premeditatively murdered them gals?
862
00:53:36,914 --> 00:53:38,677
Well, I can't prove it.
863
00:53:38,749 --> 00:53:41,912
But since thinkin' don't cost nothin',
I can think it, and I do.
864
00:53:41,986 --> 00:53:45,353
Yeah, but Pop, he got
pretty banged up himself.
865
00:53:45,423 --> 00:53:47,948
Well, hell yeah,
he got banged up, but goddamn...
866
00:53:48,025 --> 00:53:50,755
I mean, them pretty little gals in there
look like a goddamn giant
867
00:53:50,828 --> 00:53:52,523
chewed 'em up and spit 'em out.
868
00:53:52,596 --> 00:53:53,961
Did any of 'em survive?
869
00:53:54,031 --> 00:53:55,931
Shit.
870
00:53:56,000 --> 00:53:58,468
Two tons of metal,
200 miles an hour,
871
00:53:58,536 --> 00:54:00,936
flesh and bone
and plain old Newton...
872
00:54:01,005 --> 00:54:03,098
they all princess died.
873
00:54:10,214 --> 00:54:11,613
Why?
874
00:54:11,682 --> 00:54:15,982
Well, I'd guesstimate
it's a sex thing.
875
00:54:16,053 --> 00:54:18,044
The only way I can figure it.
876
00:54:18,122 --> 00:54:23,253
High-velocity impact,
twisted metal, busted glass,
877
00:54:23,327 --> 00:54:26,387
all four souls taken
exactly the same time.
878
00:54:27,731 --> 00:54:31,724
Probably the only way that diabolical
degenerate can shoot his goo.
879
00:54:32,903 --> 00:54:35,428
Yeah, I think the only thing
we can dream of getting that bastard on
880
00:54:35,506 --> 00:54:38,998
is vehicular manslaughter
for the hitchhiker in the death box.
881
00:54:39,076 --> 00:54:41,943
That was just plain old,
goddamn reckless endangerment.
882
00:54:42,012 --> 00:54:45,004
But I got me a goddamn bartender
883
00:54:45,082 --> 00:54:48,711
gonna testify that ol' Stuntman
Mike didn't drink a drop all night.
884
00:54:49,520 --> 00:54:52,353
And his passenger
was left stranded by her date,
885
00:54:52,423 --> 00:54:56,154
in the goddamn rain, no less,
and she asked him for the fucking ride.
886
00:54:56,227 --> 00:55:00,061
Now, on paper, this is gonna look
like he was just trying to help her out.
887
00:55:00,130 --> 00:55:02,428
I mean, that's the way
the jury's gonna see it.
888
00:55:02,500 --> 00:55:04,695
So, what are you gonna do, Pop?
889
00:55:04,768 --> 00:55:05,860
Tsk.
890
00:55:05,936 --> 00:55:08,871
Well, I could take it
upon myself to work the case,
891
00:55:11,350 --> 00:55:14,513
Search for evidence,
you know, prove my theory.
892
00:55:14,586 --> 00:55:15,848
Alert authorities.
893
00:55:15,921 --> 00:55:19,516
Dog that rotten son of a bitch...
wherever he goes, I go.
894
00:55:19,591 --> 00:55:24,722
Or I could spend the same
goddamn amount of time and energy
895
00:55:24,797 --> 00:55:27,732
following the NASCAR circuit.
896
00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:29,960
Hmm. I've thought about it a lot.
897
00:55:30,034 --> 00:55:33,492
I think I'd have a hell
of a lot happier life if I did the latter.
898
00:55:33,571 --> 00:55:34,560
And just because I can't
899
00:55:34,639 --> 00:55:38,871
punish Old Frankenstein
in there for what he's done,
900
00:55:38,943 --> 00:55:41,741
I'm gonna tell you
like the Lord told John...
901
00:55:41,813 --> 00:55:43,804
if he ever does it again,
902
00:55:43,881 --> 00:55:47,180
I can make goddamn sure
he don't do it in Texas.
903
00:55:58,462 --> 00:56:00,657
# You know you're sliding down #
904
00:56:01,799 --> 00:56:03,698
# Against your heart #
905
00:56:05,168 --> 00:56:06,760
# Yeah, you got one #
906
00:56:10,173 --> 00:56:12,767
# Just close your eyes #
907
00:56:13,844 --> 00:56:16,244
# So you can see #
908
00:56:17,047 --> 00:56:19,379
# So you can see #
909
00:56:20,250 --> 00:56:21,945
# No, baby, I don 't care #
910
00:56:22,018 --> 00:56:24,851
# What they say, it's so easy #
911
00:56:28,959 --> 00:56:31,189
# No, baby, I don 't care #
912
00:56:31,261 --> 00:56:33,855
# What they say, it's so easy #
913
00:56:37,566 --> 00:56:39,158
# Yeah, it's comin' on #
914
00:56:41,203 --> 00:56:43,296
# It's getting sweeter #
915
00:56:44,406 --> 00:56:46,101
# And sweeter #
916
00:56:49,445 --> 00:56:51,913
# If you're gonna drown #
917
00:56:53,215 --> 00:56:55,479
# Then do it the right way #
918
00:56:57,086 --> 00:56:58,747
# The right way #
919
00:57:00,489 --> 00:57:05,449
# I don't care what they say, it's so easy #
920
00:57:08,998 --> 00:57:12,023
# I don't care what they say, it's so... #
921
00:57:13,167 --> 00:57:16,330
Are you on the same floor as him?
No, he's on the fourth.
922
00:57:16,404 --> 00:57:18,736
- And who's in whose room?
- He's in mine.
923
00:57:18,806 --> 00:57:20,068
And so what happened then?
924
00:57:20,141 --> 00:57:24,407
We made out for about ten minutes,
and then I sent him off to his room.
925
00:57:24,479 --> 00:57:28,074
- So how's the Rock as a kisser?
- Mm, he's damn good.
926
00:57:28,149 --> 00:57:30,947
He's got them mushy lips,
smooth fingertips.
927
00:57:31,019 --> 00:57:32,919
Mm, I love them mushy lips.
928
00:57:32,987 --> 00:57:36,115
He's a big guy, so he spins me around
so my back is up against him,
929
00:57:36,190 --> 00:57:38,750
takes his big hand
and puts it on my throat,
930
00:57:38,826 --> 00:57:43,286
tilts my head back and leans over me,
kisses me from behind.
931
00:57:43,364 --> 00:57:44,762
Damn, that sounds sexy!
932
00:57:44,831 --> 00:57:46,355
It was sexy.
933
00:57:46,433 --> 00:57:50,335
But then that was it?
You sent him off? How'd he take it?
934
00:57:50,404 --> 00:57:52,099
Wait a minute, what are we doing here?
935
00:57:52,172 --> 00:57:55,903
If I'm gonna power through and pick up
Zoë at the airport, I need coffee.
936
00:57:55,976 --> 00:57:59,810
Since you're getting that, can you get
some more vodka and sugar-free Red Bull?
937
00:58:02,182 --> 00:58:03,479
We didn't know you were awake.
938
00:58:03,550 --> 00:58:05,245
I'm not awake. I'm asleep.
939
00:58:05,319 --> 00:58:08,413
But get some more vodka
and some sugar-free Red Bull anyway.
940
00:58:09,189 --> 00:58:10,656
And some Red Apple Tans.
941
00:58:10,724 --> 00:58:13,192
Damn, I didn't stop
to get you bitches groceries.
942
00:58:15,429 --> 00:58:17,862
- You remember how to get to the airport?
Uh-huh.
943
00:58:17,930 --> 00:58:20,763
Then you should get behind the wheel,
'cause you gonna drive.
944
00:58:22,635 --> 00:58:24,125
Motherfuckers.
945
00:58:40,920 --> 00:58:42,854
They ain't got sugar-free Red Bull.
946
00:58:42,922 --> 00:58:45,516
They got regular Red Bull
and sugar-free G.O. juice.
947
00:58:45,591 --> 00:58:48,321
G.O.
G.O.!
948
00:59:13,585 --> 00:59:19,717
# It's not the way you kiss
that says you're mine #
949
00:59:23,094 --> 00:59:27,553
# Many, many, many nights go by #
950
00:59:27,631 --> 00:59:33,399
# I sit alone at home and cry over you #
951
00:59:33,470 --> 00:59:36,667
# What can I do #
952
00:59:36,740 --> 00:59:42,201
# Don't want nobody, nobody #
953
00:59:42,279 --> 00:59:45,578
# 'Cause, baby, it's you #
954
00:59:55,059 --> 00:59:58,620
# Is it true what they say #
955
00:59:58,695 --> 01:00:02,858
# All about you #
956
01:00:04,834 --> 01:00:10,295
# They say you'll never
ever never be true #
957
01:00:12,909 --> 01:00:17,573
# It doesn't matter what they say #
958
01:00:17,647 --> 01:00:21,208
# I know I'm gonna
love you any old way #
959
01:00:21,284 --> 01:00:24,253
# What would I do #
960
01:00:24,320 --> 01:00:27,517
# Without you #
961
01:00:27,590 --> 01:00:29,922
# I don't want nobody... #
962
01:00:30,193 --> 01:00:33,025
Where the hell are my keys?
Here they are.
963
01:00:34,396 --> 01:00:37,024
Sorry, I didn't mean to give
you a concert there.
964
01:00:37,099 --> 01:00:39,226
No, it wasn't you.
965
01:00:39,301 --> 01:00:41,997
That guy bumped into my feet
when he walked by.
966
01:00:43,438 --> 01:00:46,271
I don't know why,
but that kind of creeped me out.
967
01:01:02,157 --> 01:01:05,217
# I don't care
what they saying to me #
968
01:01:11,866 --> 01:01:13,390
Little dick.
969
01:01:15,236 --> 01:01:16,567
Clearly.
970
01:01:18,172 --> 01:01:23,200
Since I'm up,
I might as well hit the ATM.
971
01:01:24,545 --> 01:01:26,604
Get me a fuckin' smoke.
972
01:02:50,795 --> 01:02:52,558
What?
973
01:02:52,630 --> 01:02:54,598
Did you just see the...
974
01:02:54,665 --> 01:02:55,654
What?
975
01:02:57,935 --> 01:02:59,061
Nothing, honey.
976
01:03:22,692 --> 01:03:23,681
Y'ello.
977
01:03:23,760 --> 01:03:25,091
It's me.
978
01:03:25,161 --> 01:03:26,458
Miss me?
979
01:03:27,964 --> 01:03:30,558
You best get your ass
off Kim's car.
980
01:03:30,634 --> 01:03:34,400
- I've seen Kim sit on it before.
- Her ass ain't your ass.
981
01:03:34,471 --> 01:03:38,908
Okay. So, I think I'm in
this month's issue of Allure.
982
01:03:42,479 --> 01:03:43,969
You got Allure?
983
01:03:44,047 --> 01:03:45,947
Magazines by the window.
984
01:04:00,329 --> 01:04:01,990
Here you are!
985
01:04:05,000 --> 01:04:06,695
You hot mama, you.
986
01:04:06,769 --> 01:04:08,600
See you in a second.
987
01:04:08,671 --> 01:04:11,765
$3.85... out of 20.
988
01:04:15,878 --> 01:04:18,870
And you get 16 and change back.
Thank you very much.
989
01:04:21,250 --> 01:04:24,481
You know, I got other fashion magazines
for sale behind the counter.
990
01:04:27,022 --> 01:04:29,456
No, that's okay.
This'll be all.
991
01:04:29,525 --> 01:04:30,684
Thought I'd ask.
992
01:04:30,758 --> 01:04:32,521
- Thanks anyway.
- Have a good one.
993
01:04:35,663 --> 01:04:38,325
I got this month's issue
of Italian Vogue.
994
01:04:43,571 --> 01:04:44,833
This month's?
995
01:04:46,674 --> 01:04:48,938
Listen to this.
996
01:04:49,010 --> 01:04:53,743
The Circle A clerk has
this month's issue of Italian Vogue.
997
01:04:53,815 --> 01:04:54,975
- No way.
- Way!
998
01:04:55,049 --> 01:04:57,540
I can't believe fuckin' Circle A
carries Italian Vogue.
999
01:04:57,618 --> 01:05:00,052
It doesn't. It's his own personal copy.
1000
01:05:00,121 --> 01:05:02,385
He'll let it go for 27 bucks.
1001
01:05:02,457 --> 01:05:04,321
27 bucks?
1002
01:05:04,391 --> 01:05:06,825
What the fuck do you care?
We're talking about per diem here.
1003
01:05:06,893 --> 01:05:09,794
We found an issue of Italian Vogue
in Lebanon, Tennessee.
1004
01:05:09,863 --> 01:05:11,797
We're lucky he's not asking
for fuckin' Krugerrands.
1005
01:05:11,865 --> 01:05:13,992
I'm getting it, and we're
splitting it three ways.
1006
01:05:14,067 --> 01:05:15,329
What, me, you, and Kim?
1007
01:05:15,402 --> 01:05:17,233
Kim doesn't give
a shit about Italian Vogue.
1008
01:05:17,304 --> 01:05:20,967
but Brandy'll come in with us,
and if she won't, Tisla, her sister, will.
1009
01:05:21,808 --> 01:05:24,777
Okay, but if anybody tears out
any sheets I want,
1010
01:05:24,845 --> 01:05:28,212
you gotta make color Xeroxes
of those pages, and I'm not talking Kinko's.
1011
01:05:28,281 --> 01:05:32,308
You take it to the art department
and have them do it fuckin' right.
1012
01:05:50,035 --> 01:05:52,333
Whoo!
1013
01:05:55,975 --> 01:05:57,203
Oh, my God!
1014
01:06:05,351 --> 01:06:06,750
Got it!
1015
01:06:16,361 --> 01:06:18,386
...the actress...
1016
01:06:29,874 --> 01:06:31,364
Oh, boy.
1017
01:06:34,345 --> 01:06:36,370
Your timing couldn't be better, Zoë.
1018
01:06:36,448 --> 01:06:41,044
It just so happens we're all three
off-duty for the next three days.
1019
01:06:41,119 --> 01:06:43,587
Fuckin' hell! How does that happen?
1020
01:06:43,655 --> 01:06:46,646
I'm doing Lindsay Lohan's makeup,
and she's off for the next three days.
1021
01:06:46,723 --> 01:06:49,590
There's no stunts being filmed
during that time so Kim's free,
1022
01:06:49,660 --> 01:06:53,756
and Lee's on a will-notify
for the four days.
1023
01:06:53,831 --> 01:06:55,389
So how's the shoot going?
1024
01:06:55,466 --> 01:06:57,525
Great. We're having the best time.
1025
01:06:57,601 --> 01:06:59,694
The director, Cecil Evans, is so fun.
1026
01:06:59,770 --> 01:07:03,001
We're making the coolest movie
and partying all the time.
1027
01:07:03,073 --> 01:07:06,668
Hell, yeah. The next job
after this one is definitely gonna suck.
1028
01:07:06,743 --> 01:07:08,643
So let's hear it, ladies.
1029
01:07:08,712 --> 01:07:11,112
Set romances! Who's getting it off?
1030
01:07:11,181 --> 01:07:13,809
That would be Lee and Toolbox.
1031
01:07:13,884 --> 01:07:16,910
Oh, Toolbox!
Name sounds promising.
1032
01:07:16,987 --> 01:07:19,113
- He's a grip.
- What he is is a pervert.
1033
01:07:19,188 --> 01:07:21,486
Well, he just keeps sounding
better and better.
1034
01:07:22,758 --> 01:07:23,747
What's his perversion?
1035
01:07:25,862 --> 01:07:28,296
He likes to watch me pee.
1036
01:07:28,865 --> 01:07:33,325
# Lee is sitting on a toilet
and Toolbox is watching her pee #
1037
01:07:33,402 --> 01:07:35,461
# P-I-S-S-I-N-G #
1038
01:07:35,538 --> 01:07:36,527
Ooh!
1039
01:07:36,839 --> 01:07:38,568
Yeah, but not no more.
1040
01:07:38,641 --> 01:07:40,871
Now she's getting it on
with the Rock.
1041
01:07:40,943 --> 01:07:42,808
You had a one-off with the Rock?
1042
01:07:42,879 --> 01:07:45,313
Well, not the real Rock.
He's this electrician named Bruce.
1043
01:07:45,381 --> 01:07:49,215
He looks like the Rock,
so we all just call him the Rock.
1044
01:07:49,285 --> 01:07:50,946
Oh, yeah, this is an all-star crew.
1045
01:07:51,020 --> 01:07:54,614
We got a guy who looks like Nic Cage
and Pee Wee Herman, too.
1046
01:07:54,689 --> 01:07:57,123
Kim, dick department.
Let's hear it!
1047
01:07:57,192 --> 01:08:00,559
Mm-mmm, no dick this trip.
I got a man.
1048
01:08:00,629 --> 01:08:03,860
- How long have you had this boyfriend?
- About three months.
1049
01:08:03,932 --> 01:08:05,559
Who'd you steal him from?
1050
01:08:05,634 --> 01:08:06,931
Nobody!
1051
01:08:07,002 --> 01:08:09,562
Kim!
- Wha... what?
1052
01:08:09,638 --> 01:08:11,299
He totally had a girlfriend.
1053
01:08:11,373 --> 01:08:15,002
All of Kim's boyfriends start out
as somebody else's boyfriend.
1054
01:08:15,076 --> 01:08:17,169
I did not steal him!
1055
01:08:17,245 --> 01:08:22,376
I didn't steal any of them;
they just... jumped ship.
1056
01:08:24,619 --> 01:08:28,384
- So what's your story, Abernathy?
- Oh, Abbie's got the big Kahuna.
1057
01:08:28,455 --> 01:08:31,185
I had a set crush on Cecil.
1058
01:08:31,258 --> 01:08:34,591
Set crush? Nigga, please.
You were his set wife!
1059
01:08:34,662 --> 01:08:36,892
"Were" and "had" being
the key words, here.
1060
01:08:36,964 --> 01:08:39,660
Bitch, you two are still
into each other and you know it.
1061
01:08:39,733 --> 01:08:44,796
Yeah, well, if he's so in love with me,
why did he fuck Darryl Hannah's stand-in?
1062
01:08:48,375 --> 01:08:52,038
Yes, men are dogs.
Oh, it's so funny!
1063
01:08:52,112 --> 01:08:53,579
Oh, it's so funny!
1064
01:08:53,647 --> 01:08:56,172
Stop acting all hurt.
Your ass just mad.
1065
01:08:56,250 --> 01:08:58,047
Yeah, he's a stand-in fucker.
1066
01:08:58,118 --> 01:09:01,086
You need to get over that shit.
That was two weeks ago.
1067
01:09:01,154 --> 01:09:04,089
Oh, well, now you put it like that...
1068
01:09:04,958 --> 01:09:07,358
Oh, I haven't told you the best part.
1069
01:09:07,427 --> 01:09:10,521
He fucked her on my birthday.
1070
01:09:10,597 --> 01:09:13,430
Oh, that's a horse of a different color.
1071
01:09:13,499 --> 01:09:16,366
- Thank you.
- Did he know it was your birthday?
1072
01:09:16,436 --> 01:09:19,166
I mean, he's the director.
He's kind of busy.
1073
01:09:19,238 --> 01:09:23,675
He ate a piece of my birthday cake,
and he got me a present.
1074
01:09:23,743 --> 01:09:25,734
- Wow.
- Yeah... I think he knew.
1075
01:09:27,413 --> 01:09:28,903
What did he get you?
1076
01:09:32,485 --> 01:09:33,952
He made me a tape.
1077
01:09:34,120 --> 01:09:35,746
He made you a tape?
1078
01:09:35,821 --> 01:09:38,051
Wait, he didn't burn you a CD?
1079
01:09:38,123 --> 01:09:39,488
He made you a tape?
1080
01:09:39,558 --> 01:09:42,550
- Yeah.
- Oh, that is so romantic!
1081
01:09:42,628 --> 01:09:45,722
Yes, I know what you're gonna say,
so don't even go there.
1082
01:09:45,797 --> 01:09:47,822
This sounds like the test
of true love to me.
1083
01:09:47,899 --> 01:09:51,596
Look, I know you guys like him.
He's likeable.
1084
01:09:51,670 --> 01:09:54,264
But he fucked another woman
on my birthday.
1085
01:09:54,339 --> 01:09:56,705
How can you not be on my side?
1086
01:09:56,775 --> 01:09:58,265
I admit, that sounds bad.
1087
01:09:58,343 --> 01:09:59,605
It is bad!
1088
01:09:59,678 --> 01:10:02,545
It just sounds like there's
a little more to it than that.
1089
01:10:02,614 --> 01:10:03,774
Were you two fucking?
1090
01:10:03,849 --> 01:10:05,339
Hell, no.
1091
01:10:05,417 --> 01:10:07,282
Hello, is your name Abernathy?
1092
01:10:07,352 --> 01:10:08,340
Sorry.
1093
01:10:08,419 --> 01:10:11,980
The answer to your question
is no, of course not.
1094
01:10:12,056 --> 01:10:15,048
What do you mean "No, of course not"?
1095
01:10:15,126 --> 01:10:18,118
The reason Cecil hasn't had
a girlfriend in six years
1096
01:10:18,195 --> 01:10:21,494
is because girls will fuck him,
and if you fuck Cecil,
1097
01:10:21,565 --> 01:10:23,829
you don't become one
of his girlfriends...
1098
01:10:23,901 --> 01:10:26,836
not to say I want to be his girlfriend,
1099
01:10:26,904 --> 01:10:32,103
but if I did want to be his girlfriend,
if I fucked him, I wouldn't be.
1100
01:10:32,176 --> 01:10:37,842
I'd be one of his regulars,
and I'm getting too fuckin' old for that shit.
1101
01:10:37,915 --> 01:10:41,112
- Have you let him do anything?
- Yes!
1102
01:10:42,819 --> 01:10:44,719
I've let him give me a foot massage,
1103
01:10:44,788 --> 01:10:48,656
and when we go to the movies,
I've let him hold my hand.
1104
01:10:48,725 --> 01:10:51,455
Bitch, you might be actin'
like you 12 years old,
1105
01:10:51,528 --> 01:10:53,052
but he just acting like a man.
1106
01:10:53,129 --> 01:10:55,222
You need to break
that nigga off a piece.
1107
01:10:55,298 --> 01:10:56,629
Let me get this straight...
1108
01:10:57,667 --> 01:11:00,966
you're not fucking him,
you're not sucking him,
1109
01:11:01,037 --> 01:11:04,905
you're not giving him any tongue,
but Darryl Hannah's stand-in is?
1110
01:11:04,974 --> 01:11:07,135
Can we just take my sex life
off the table?
1111
01:11:07,210 --> 01:11:10,577
Actually, it was Cecil's sex life
that was on the table...
1112
01:11:10,647 --> 01:11:12,308
and your lack of one.
1113
01:11:18,120 --> 01:11:20,486
Fuck both of you
and your little high-five.
1114
01:11:20,556 --> 01:11:24,993
Before you can claim a nigga,
you got to claim a nigga,
1115
01:11:25,060 --> 01:11:27,961
and you can start by giving
that motherfucker a hand job
1116
01:11:28,030 --> 01:11:29,759
in the back of the van
on Tuesday.
1117
01:11:29,832 --> 01:11:30,992
I'm not gonna do that!
1118
01:11:31,066 --> 01:11:33,626
I know you won't!
But you know who will...
1119
01:11:33,702 --> 01:11:36,671
the bitch that ends up living
in that big-ass mansion of his.
1120
01:11:36,739 --> 01:11:39,799
I haven't entirely agreed
with everything Kim's said,
1121
01:11:39,875 --> 01:11:43,675
but it is true if you've stretched it out
like you have with Cecil
1122
01:11:43,746 --> 01:11:48,308
and you suddenly get dirty on them,
it blows their mind.
1123
01:11:49,650 --> 01:11:53,086
So Zoë, Kim, and I are
in the Philippines at an outdoor rave.
1124
01:11:53,154 --> 01:11:56,487
What were you working on?
- Three Kicks to the Head. Part Three.
1125
01:11:56,557 --> 01:11:59,993
And, admittedly,
we're a little fucked up.
1126
01:12:00,061 --> 01:12:02,325
Cheers to that.
- Word.
1127
01:12:03,030 --> 01:12:04,258
Cheers.
1128
01:12:04,332 --> 01:12:05,856
So Zoë...
1129
01:12:07,001 --> 01:12:10,869
the genius, wants to take
a picture of me.
1130
01:12:12,006 --> 01:12:15,407
It's dark as hell,
and you can't see shit.
1131
01:12:15,476 --> 01:12:19,105
So she's got her camera
and keeps saying, "Step back a little!"
1132
01:12:19,180 --> 01:12:20,238
So I do.
1133
01:12:20,314 --> 01:12:22,646
Then "A little fu-ther!"
1134
01:12:22,717 --> 01:12:27,380
So I step back a little fu-ther.
Then "A little more!" So I do.
1135
01:12:27,454 --> 01:12:33,393
Then I realize I'm at the edge
of a seven-foot concrete ditch...
1136
01:12:33,460 --> 01:12:35,894
...with God knows how many rocks
1137
01:12:35,962 --> 01:12:40,194
and broken bottles and rats in it,
and if I fell in that fucking thing,
1138
01:12:40,267 --> 01:12:42,258
I probably would have broken my neck.
1139
01:12:42,335 --> 01:12:46,066
So I am yelling at her:
"Zoë, you almost killed me!"
1140
01:12:47,741 --> 01:12:51,768
So we laugh about it
and walk a little further,
1141
01:12:51,845 --> 01:12:54,370
and Zoë starts fuckin' around.
1142
01:12:54,447 --> 01:12:58,542
And... bam! ...if she doesn't fall
in the fucking ditch!
1143
01:13:00,019 --> 01:13:01,782
Nice.
1144
01:13:01,854 --> 01:13:04,516
Thank you. Yep. Thank you.
1145
01:13:05,624 --> 01:13:08,092
I remember taking a step
and looking down,
1146
01:13:08,160 --> 01:13:11,721
just as I'm thinking, "There's that ditch
Abbie was talking about."
1147
01:13:11,797 --> 01:13:14,163
Bam! I'm in the fucking ditch, you know.
1148
01:13:14,233 --> 01:13:15,598
What happened?
1149
01:13:15,668 --> 01:13:18,034
What, with Zoë, the cat?
1150
01:13:18,103 --> 01:13:19,127
Nothing.
1151
01:13:19,205 --> 01:13:23,198
If I fell in that fuckin' thing, they would
have had to helicopter me out of there.
1152
01:13:23,275 --> 01:13:25,573
Zoë just lands on her feet.
1153
01:13:25,644 --> 01:13:29,774
But then later I started feeling
a little bad about myself...
1154
01:13:29,849 --> 01:13:34,911
Zoë falls in the ditch and it's nothing.
We're laughing about it.
1155
01:13:34,986 --> 01:13:39,320
If I fell in that fucking thing,
I probably would have been paralyzed.
1156
01:13:39,390 --> 01:13:41,654
Oh, honey, you can't think like that.
1157
01:13:41,726 --> 01:13:45,560
We all have our individual talents,
and that just happens to be one of Zoë's.
1158
01:13:45,630 --> 01:13:50,124
Well, physically speaking,
Zoë is amazing.
1159
01:13:50,201 --> 01:13:52,863
I mean, agility, reflexes, nimbleness?
1160
01:13:53,705 --> 01:13:56,833
There's few human beings that can fuck
with Zoë on that front.
1161
01:13:56,908 --> 01:13:58,933
Kim, I like you too.
1162
01:13:59,878 --> 01:14:04,338
Having said that, before you get
too envious of Zoë's prowess,
1163
01:14:04,415 --> 01:14:07,144
you 're missing the most
important part of that story.
1164
01:14:07,217 --> 01:14:10,744
You didn't fall in the ditch.
Zoë did.
1165
01:14:10,821 --> 01:14:14,723
Zoë even knew there was a ditch there
because you told her,
1166
01:14:14,791 --> 01:14:16,691
and she still fell in.
1167
01:14:16,760 --> 01:14:19,854
So Lee's right.
We all have our talents.
1168
01:14:19,930 --> 01:14:23,024
Hey, I resemble that remark.
1169
01:14:26,270 --> 01:14:28,363
So Kim, you still pack a Roscoe?
1170
01:14:31,642 --> 01:14:33,473
Check it out, bitch.
1171
01:14:33,543 --> 01:14:35,909
- Ooh, nice one, mate.
- I know this.
1172
01:14:35,979 --> 01:14:37,173
What's a Roscoe?
1173
01:14:37,247 --> 01:14:38,544
Roscoe's a pistol.
1174
01:14:39,382 --> 01:14:41,316
- You carry a gun?
- Uh-huh.
1175
01:14:41,384 --> 01:14:43,375
You have a license to carry?
1176
01:14:43,452 --> 01:14:47,354
Yeah, when I became a Secret Service
agent, they gave me a license.
1177
01:14:48,090 --> 01:14:49,887
Oh, I didn't know you were...
1178
01:14:52,662 --> 01:14:56,723
Okay, I didn't say it, all right?
Stop looking at me. God.
1179
01:14:57,833 --> 01:14:59,767
Did you know Kim carried a gun?
1180
01:14:59,835 --> 01:15:03,896
Yes. Now, do I approve? No.
1181
01:15:03,973 --> 01:15:05,998
Do I know? Yes.
1182
01:15:06,075 --> 01:15:09,738
Look, I don't know what
futuristic utopia you live in,
1183
01:15:09,812 --> 01:15:12,678
but the world I live in,
a bitch need a gun.
1184
01:15:12,747 --> 01:15:16,342
You can't get around the fact
that people who carry guns
1185
01:15:16,418 --> 01:15:19,148
tend to get shot
more than people who don't.
1186
01:15:19,220 --> 01:15:23,020
And you can't get around the fact
that if I go down to the laundry room
1187
01:15:23,091 --> 01:15:25,992
at midnight enough times,
I might get my ass raped.
1188
01:15:26,061 --> 01:15:27,756
Don't do your laundry at midnight.
1189
01:15:27,829 --> 01:15:31,526
Fuck that! I wanna do my laundry
whenever the fuck I want to.
1190
01:15:31,599 --> 01:15:35,865
There are other things you can carry
other than a gun. Pepper spray.
1191
01:15:35,937 --> 01:15:40,397
Uh, motherfucker trying to rape me,
I don't want to give him a skin rash.
1192
01:15:40,475 --> 01:15:42,272
I wanna shut that nigga down!
1193
01:15:44,145 --> 01:15:46,375
How about a knife, at least?
1194
01:15:46,447 --> 01:15:48,881
Yeah, you know what happens
to motherfuckers carry knives?
1195
01:15:50,784 --> 01:15:52,684
They get shot!
1196
01:15:52,753 --> 01:15:56,780
If I ever become a famous actress,
I won't carry a gun.
1197
01:15:56,857 --> 01:16:00,520
I'll hire me a do-dirt nigga and he'll
carry the gun, and when shit goes down,
1198
01:16:00,594 --> 01:16:03,995
I'll sit back and laugh,
but until that day, it's Wild West.
1199
01:16:04,064 --> 01:16:07,625
So Zoë, you thought about
what you want to do first?
1200
01:16:09,336 --> 01:16:12,965
It just so happens
I know exactly what I want to do.
1201
01:16:13,040 --> 01:16:16,476
Oh, really?
And what would that be?
1202
01:16:16,543 --> 01:16:21,241
To me, there's no point in being in America
unless you can drive a Detroit muscle car.
1203
01:16:21,314 --> 01:16:25,580
I wanna drive a Dodge Challenger...
fuck me swinging, balls out.
1204
01:16:28,554 --> 01:16:31,114
Well, I guess we
could talk to Transpo,
1205
01:16:31,190 --> 01:16:33,590
but does it have to be
a Dodge Challenger?
1206
01:16:33,659 --> 01:16:38,153
Not just that. It has to be a 1970
Dodge Challenger with a 440 engine.
1207
01:16:42,135 --> 01:16:45,263
How in the fuck
do you expect to do that?
1208
01:16:45,338 --> 01:16:46,669
No worries, mate.
1209
01:16:46,739 --> 01:16:48,969
I've got it all worked out.
1210
01:16:49,042 --> 01:16:52,273
When I knew I was coming here,
I went online and found out
1211
01:16:52,345 --> 01:16:55,802
that the local paper here in Tennessee
is the Lebanon News Sentinel.
1212
01:16:55,881 --> 01:16:58,645
- So back home...
- I'm sorry, where's home? Australia?
1213
01:17:01,186 --> 01:17:03,381
What do you mean by that, mate?
1214
01:17:03,455 --> 01:17:06,515
Zoë's from New Zealand,
and you never...
1215
01:17:06,591 --> 01:17:10,049
I repeat, never...
call a Kiwi an Aussie.
1216
01:17:10,128 --> 01:17:12,824
That is, unless
you want your ass kicked.
1217
01:17:14,733 --> 01:17:16,530
I'm so sorry. I will nev...
1218
01:17:17,736 --> 01:17:19,294
Oh, it's okay.
1219
01:17:19,371 --> 01:17:22,465
We're just taking the piss
out of you, mate.
1220
01:17:22,541 --> 01:17:25,704
Auckland, to answer your question.
1221
01:17:25,777 --> 01:17:28,836
Anyway, I subscribed
to the local paper a month ago.
1222
01:17:28,913 --> 01:17:32,508
Why the fuck you want a local redneck
newspaper in New Zealand?
1223
01:17:32,583 --> 01:17:35,051
Pipe down and I'll tell you.
1224
01:17:35,119 --> 01:17:38,054
I've been getting the paper
and checking the classifieds,
1225
01:17:38,122 --> 01:17:39,714
looking at cars for sale,
1226
01:17:39,790 --> 01:17:44,454
so as of yesterday,
for sale in this town,
1227
01:17:44,528 --> 01:17:47,793
some dude is selling
a stock 1970 Dodge Challenger
1228
01:17:47,865 --> 01:17:51,631
with a 440 engine and a white paint job.
1229
01:17:51,702 --> 01:17:53,499
And you wanna buy it?
1230
01:17:54,772 --> 01:17:58,435
Kim, I may be stupid,
but I'm not bloody stupid.
1231
01:17:58,509 --> 01:18:02,535
I wanna say I wanna buy it
so he'll let me test-drive it.
1232
01:18:02,612 --> 01:18:05,740
A 1970 Dodge Challenger
with a white paint job?
1233
01:18:05,815 --> 01:18:07,373
Oh, uh, Kowalski!
1234
01:18:07,450 --> 01:18:11,216
Kowalski from Vanishing Point.
Mate, it's a fucking classic!
1235
01:18:11,287 --> 01:18:12,720
If I can get this guy
1236
01:18:12,789 --> 01:18:16,657
to let me drive it without him,
I will blow the doors off that bitch.
1237
01:18:16,726 --> 01:18:18,591
What's Vanishing Point?
1238
01:18:19,696 --> 01:18:21,664
What's Vanishing Point?
1239
01:18:21,731 --> 01:18:24,700
Abs, I'm supposed
to be the illiterate one.
1240
01:18:24,767 --> 01:18:27,736
It's just one of the best
American movies ever made.
1241
01:18:27,804 --> 01:18:31,331
Actually, Zoë, most girls
wouldn't know Vanishing Point.
1242
01:18:32,375 --> 01:18:36,401
Excuse me. Most girls?
What the fuck are you two?
1243
01:18:36,478 --> 01:18:39,970
Yeah, well, we're gearheads.
Of course we watched it.
1244
01:18:40,048 --> 01:18:42,414
Y'all grew up watching
that Pretty in Pink shit.
1245
01:18:42,484 --> 01:18:44,816
Oh, I liked Pretty in Pink.
1246
01:18:44,887 --> 01:18:47,355
What, so you didn't watch
John Hughes movies?
1247
01:18:47,422 --> 01:18:51,449
Of course I did. I'm a girl.
But I also watched car shit, too...
1248
01:18:51,527 --> 01:18:54,223
Vanishing Point. Dirty Mary Crazy Larry.
1249
01:18:54,296 --> 01:18:55,854
- Gone in 60 Seconds...
- Oh...
1250
01:18:55,931 --> 01:18:58,900
The real one, not that
Angelina Jolie bullshit.
1251
01:18:58,967 --> 01:19:02,698
We have an outdoor theater in Auckland
that plays Vanishing Point.
1252
01:19:02,771 --> 01:19:05,467
Big Wednesday, all the classics.
1253
01:19:22,056 --> 01:19:23,956
What do you horny gals want?
1254
01:19:27,562 --> 01:19:30,861
Yeah, you got
a 1970 Dodge Challenger for sale?
1255
01:19:30,932 --> 01:19:32,399
Right up here, ladies.
1256
01:19:47,013 --> 01:19:50,073
This shit is off the fuckin' hook!
1257
01:19:50,150 --> 01:19:52,584
Fuckin' legendary, mate.
1258
01:19:54,821 --> 01:20:00,157
Sweet ass. Well, if you 'll excuse me,
I'd like to have a word with my associate.
1259
01:20:00,227 --> 01:20:01,717
You ladies take your time.
1260
01:20:08,568 --> 01:20:11,628
What are you waiting for?
Ask him to let you drive it by yourself.
1261
01:20:11,705 --> 01:20:14,299
I intend to, but first I need
to ask you something.
1262
01:20:14,374 --> 01:20:15,466
What?
1263
01:20:15,542 --> 01:20:20,069
If he lets us take it out on our own,
I wanna play Ship's Mast.
1264
01:20:20,813 --> 01:20:22,542
- Oh, hell, no!
- Keep it down!
1265
01:20:22,615 --> 01:20:24,549
Ain't no way I'm doing Ship's Mast.
1266
01:20:24,617 --> 01:20:25,811
- For Chrissakes...
- Don't blaspheme.
1267
01:20:25,884 --> 01:20:26,873
Sorry.
1268
01:20:26,952 --> 01:20:29,716
Now, what did you say
after the last time?
1269
01:20:29,788 --> 01:20:33,053
- Look, I know what I said.
- What did you say?
1270
01:20:33,125 --> 01:20:35,218
- I know I said we shouldn't...
- No.
1271
01:20:35,294 --> 01:20:38,286
You didn't say we shouldn't.
You said we ain't ever gonna do that again.
1272
01:20:38,364 --> 01:20:40,127
- But...
- But, my ass!
1273
01:20:40,199 --> 01:20:43,225
You said not only are we never
gonna play Ship's Mast again,
1274
01:20:43,302 --> 01:20:46,362
but you also said if you ever do
what you trying to do now,
1275
01:20:46,438 --> 01:20:51,340
to not only refuse, but that I had permission
to physically restrain your ass if necessary.
1276
01:20:51,409 --> 01:20:54,105
Now, did you or did you not say that?
1277
01:20:54,178 --> 01:20:57,443
No, no, no.
Answer the question, motherfucker.
1278
01:20:57,515 --> 01:21:00,951
- Did you or did you not say that?
- Yes, I said that.
1279
01:21:01,019 --> 01:21:02,953
- However...
- Whatever with your "however."
1280
01:21:03,021 --> 01:21:06,957
Look, I know I said it,
and I know I meant it...
1281
01:21:07,025 --> 01:21:08,253
Damn skippy you meant it!
1282
01:21:08,326 --> 01:21:11,022
But when I said it,
I didn't mean in America!
1283
01:21:11,095 --> 01:21:13,120
- Oh, nigga, please.
- For real. Really.
1284
01:21:13,197 --> 01:21:17,224
I meant we should never play Ship's Mast
again in New Zealand or Australia.
1285
01:21:17,302 --> 01:21:18,997
You are such a liar!
1286
01:21:19,070 --> 01:21:24,667
I know what I said, but when I said it
I didn't know I'd ever come to America,
1287
01:21:24,742 --> 01:21:28,142
and if I had of known
I was gonna come to America,
1288
01:21:28,211 --> 01:21:31,874
had the opportunity to play Ship's Mast
on the Vanishing Point Challenger...
1289
01:21:31,948 --> 01:21:34,075
I would have added a "however."
1290
01:21:34,851 --> 01:21:35,840
Right?
1291
01:21:41,325 --> 01:21:43,589
Okay, oddly enough,
I actually understood that.
1292
01:21:43,660 --> 01:21:48,529
However, just because
you talked yourself into some stupid shit
1293
01:21:48,598 --> 01:21:50,725
doesn't mean I have lost
my goddamn mind.
1294
01:21:50,801 --> 01:21:54,032
You need two people to play Ship's Mast,
and I ain't playing.
1295
01:22:01,577 --> 01:22:03,704
I'll be your best friend.
1296
01:22:03,779 --> 01:22:06,680
I don't need me no best friend
lives on the other side of Planet Earth.
1297
01:22:06,749 --> 01:22:08,046
I'll crack your back.
1298
01:22:08,117 --> 01:22:09,584
You'll crack it anyway.
1299
01:22:09,652 --> 01:22:12,382
Well, of course I'll crack it anyway.
1300
01:22:12,455 --> 01:22:16,118
But now, while I'm here,
I'll be your back-cracking slave.
1301
01:22:16,192 --> 01:22:18,888
Whenever you want it, you've got it.
You don't even have to ask.
1302
01:22:18,961 --> 01:22:22,419
You just order me to do it, just be like,
"Bitch, get over here and get busy."
1303
01:22:29,638 --> 01:22:34,074
You crack my back, give me foot massages,
and after a shower, you moisturize my butt.
1304
01:22:35,343 --> 01:22:36,332
Deal.
1305
01:22:38,146 --> 01:22:40,944
We're gonna see if this guy'll let us
take the car out without him.
1306
01:22:41,015 --> 01:22:44,007
If he does, you wait here with Lee
and we'll be back in a moment.
1307
01:22:44,586 --> 01:22:45,575
What?
1308
01:22:45,653 --> 01:22:50,056
- I said we're gonna see if this guy'll let...
- I heard what you said.
1309
01:22:50,125 --> 01:22:53,526
I just can't believe
what you said.
1310
01:22:54,863 --> 01:22:56,660
You two got some fuckin' balls.
1311
01:22:56,731 --> 01:22:58,164
What?
1312
01:22:58,233 --> 01:22:59,723
Don't play dumbass with me.
1313
01:22:59,801 --> 01:23:04,795
I've been up all night, I'm still a little drunk,
and I have a hangover.
1314
01:23:04,873 --> 01:23:08,569
I should be in my hotel room, asleep,
not fuckin' around on Tobacco Road,
1315
01:23:08,642 --> 01:23:12,442
but because Zoë wanted to drive
some Vanishing Point car, I'm here.
1316
01:23:12,513 --> 01:23:16,472
Now you two got the balls to ask me...
no, scratch that... tell me
1317
01:23:16,550 --> 01:23:21,044
I gotta go make conversation with Tom Joad
while the cool kids get to go out and play?
1318
01:23:21,121 --> 01:23:22,918
Bullshit on that.
1319
01:23:22,990 --> 01:23:25,015
- It ain't like that.
- What's it like, Kim?
1320
01:23:25,092 --> 01:23:28,994
You guys are our collateral.
He's never gonna go for it if we all go.
1321
01:23:29,062 --> 01:23:32,725
I really think one human being
will be collateral enough.
1322
01:23:33,567 --> 01:23:35,535
You're not gonna
want to do what we're doing.
1323
01:23:35,602 --> 01:23:36,933
What, drive a car?
1324
01:23:37,971 --> 01:23:39,063
We're doing more than that.
1325
01:23:39,139 --> 01:23:40,833
What, drive it fast?
1326
01:23:42,241 --> 01:23:43,902
We're doing more than that.
1327
01:23:43,976 --> 01:23:48,538
Actually, we're paying you a compliment,
'cause we gonna do some stupid shit.
1328
01:23:50,416 --> 01:23:53,010
But that's okay. We're stunt people.
We ain't got good sense.
1329
01:23:53,085 --> 01:23:55,519
But you got good sense,
and anybody with good sense
1330
01:23:55,588 --> 01:23:58,557
- ain't gonna want to do what we're doing.
- How do you know?
1331
01:23:58,624 --> 01:24:00,683
'Cause you're a mum.
1332
01:24:00,760 --> 01:24:02,057
Yeah.
1333
01:24:04,730 --> 01:24:07,563
You know, we're supposed
to be this big posse,
1334
01:24:07,633 --> 01:24:11,535
but that's the excuse you guys use
whenever you want to exclude me,
1335
01:24:11,604 --> 01:24:14,470
so what is it you two daredevils are doing
1336
01:24:14,539 --> 01:24:18,805
that I'm just so uncool
I couldn't possibly understand?
1337
01:24:18,877 --> 01:24:21,277
You know, we're kind of conning this guy,
1338
01:24:21,346 --> 01:24:25,043
so maybe it's best if we don't go
into detail about it while he's watching us.
1339
01:24:25,116 --> 01:24:26,105
Besides...
1340
01:24:27,452 --> 01:24:30,012
he's probably not gonna
let us do it, anyway.
1341
01:24:32,891 --> 01:24:35,985
Okay, how about this?
1342
01:24:36,795 --> 01:24:39,958
I'll talk him into it,
but I go along.
1343
01:24:41,132 --> 01:24:43,930
- How you gonna do that?
- That's my problem.
1344
01:24:44,703 --> 01:24:45,863
But don't worry.
1345
01:24:46,738 --> 01:24:48,796
He'll say yes.
1346
01:24:48,873 --> 01:24:51,000
What are you gonna do, blow him?
1347
01:24:51,075 --> 01:24:52,235
No.
1348
01:24:53,611 --> 01:24:56,136
I'm gonna insinuate
that Lee's gonna blow him.
1349
01:25:00,317 --> 01:25:02,012
That's a good one.
1350
01:25:02,086 --> 01:25:03,451
Not really.
1351
01:25:04,488 --> 01:25:07,787
But let me handle it.
We got a deal?
1352
01:25:12,129 --> 01:25:13,528
Okay, Mama, listen up.
1353
01:25:13,597 --> 01:25:17,328
You wanna hang with the cool kids?
You got to be cool.
1354
01:25:17,401 --> 01:25:20,234
We take you along, you don't say shit.
You don't even say crap.
1355
01:25:20,304 --> 01:25:23,329
You just sit in the back, and I don't want
to hear a peep, you understand?
1356
01:25:23,406 --> 01:25:24,805
- Got it.
- I'm serious, now.
1357
01:25:24,874 --> 01:25:28,708
You start nagging us, we pulling over,
kicking you out, and picking you up later.
1358
01:25:28,778 --> 01:25:30,109
Agreed.
1359
01:25:34,183 --> 01:25:37,209
Okay. Go work your magic.
1360
01:25:43,760 --> 01:25:45,352
- Hello, sir.
- Hello.
1361
01:25:45,428 --> 01:25:47,055
- Hello, what's your name?
- Jasper.
1362
01:25:47,130 --> 01:25:48,825
Hello, Jasper, I'm Abernathy.
1363
01:25:48,898 --> 01:25:50,525
- Aber what?
- Abernathy.
1364
01:25:50,600 --> 01:25:53,000
- What's your first name?
- That is my first name.
1365
01:25:53,069 --> 01:25:56,435
- What kind of first name is that?
- Just call me Abbie.
1366
01:25:56,505 --> 01:25:58,063
Okay, Abbie.
1367
01:25:59,207 --> 01:26:02,836
Jasper, we were wondering
if my friends and I could take the car out
1368
01:26:02,911 --> 01:26:05,937
for a little test drive out on our own,
just to see if we're comfortable.
1369
01:26:06,014 --> 01:26:07,777
Why would I do something
stupid like that?
1370
01:26:07,849 --> 01:26:10,181
To better sell your automobile.
1371
01:26:10,252 --> 01:26:12,447
How do I know y'all ain't
just gonna steal it?
1372
01:26:12,521 --> 01:26:14,455
Four reasons, actually.
1373
01:26:14,523 --> 01:26:19,256
One, we're not thieves,
two, that would be rude,
1374
01:26:19,328 --> 01:26:21,990
three, we're staying
at the Days Inn in town...
1375
01:26:22,064 --> 01:26:25,659
you can call, check with management.
We're registered for the next month.
1376
01:26:25,734 --> 01:26:30,397
Actually, Zoë's not, but Kim and I are,
so we're totally track-downable.
1377
01:26:30,471 --> 01:26:32,200
Who's Kim? The colored girl?
1378
01:26:33,007 --> 01:26:36,602
Yes. Kim would be the girl of color.
1379
01:26:36,677 --> 01:26:39,077
And reason number four...
and the most important:
1380
01:26:39,146 --> 01:26:42,081
while we're taking the car out
for a little spin,
1381
01:26:42,149 --> 01:26:46,586
that'll give you a better opportunity
to get acquainted with our other friend...
1382
01:26:47,455 --> 01:26:48,615
Lee.
1383
01:26:51,892 --> 01:26:54,019
Why does she look
kind of familiar?
1384
01:26:54,095 --> 01:26:57,087
That would be because
she's a famous actress.
1385
01:26:57,164 --> 01:26:58,153
Hmm.
1386
01:26:59,133 --> 01:27:00,623
Why's she dressed like that?
1387
01:27:00,701 --> 01:27:03,863
Well, you see, we're making
a Hollywood movie in town,
1388
01:27:03,937 --> 01:27:06,872
and it's a cheerleader movie,
and she's one of the cheerleaders.
1389
01:27:06,940 --> 01:27:08,601
What's a cheerleader movie?
1390
01:27:08,675 --> 01:27:10,438
A movie about cheerleaders.
1391
01:27:11,678 --> 01:27:12,906
Is it a porno movie?
1392
01:27:14,681 --> 01:27:21,280
Yes, it is, but don't mention it. She's shy.
1393
01:27:24,891 --> 01:27:27,621
Lee, this is Jasper.
Jasper, Lee.
1394
01:27:27,694 --> 01:27:30,424
Now, you two kids
stay out of trouble.
1395
01:27:30,497 --> 01:27:33,489
Hey, good-looking.
Be back to pick you up later.
1396
01:27:33,566 --> 01:27:34,897
Ta-ta!
1397
01:27:45,244 --> 01:27:46,677
Gulp.
1398
01:28:01,226 --> 01:28:02,659
You thinking what I'm thinking?
1399
01:28:04,329 --> 01:28:05,728
I think I'm thinking it.
1400
01:28:05,798 --> 01:28:07,288
What are you and you thinking?
1401
01:28:07,366 --> 01:28:10,699
I'm thinking we told your ass
to shut the fuck up.
1402
01:28:13,371 --> 01:28:15,464
- Where y'all going?
- You stay put.
1403
01:28:15,540 --> 01:28:16,871
I gotta take a...
1404
01:28:34,192 --> 01:28:35,989
So, you ready to do this?
1405
01:28:37,528 --> 01:28:38,586
You sure?
1406
01:28:38,663 --> 01:28:43,327
Well, I always don't want to do it
right before I'm gonna do it.
1407
01:28:43,401 --> 01:28:45,834
I know what you mean,
'cause I don't wanna do it.
1408
01:28:45,902 --> 01:28:47,028
Kim!
1409
01:28:47,104 --> 01:28:49,766
- I'm just saying.
- If you 're gonna take the piss out of it...
1410
01:28:49,840 --> 01:28:51,501
I'm just saying.
1411
01:28:52,943 --> 01:28:54,570
You wanna start out on top?
1412
01:28:56,012 --> 01:28:59,345
Practically doesn't count
if you start on the top.
1413
01:29:04,821 --> 01:29:06,015
Here are your gloves.
1414
01:29:13,196 --> 01:29:15,721
No, no, no, no.
I'm wearing a jacket.
1415
01:29:15,799 --> 01:29:17,562
This is my jacket.
1416
01:29:17,634 --> 01:29:20,932
Um, ain't you supposed to be
my slave or some shit?
1417
01:29:22,037 --> 01:29:25,268
- Come on.
- I'm the one who's on the bonnet.
1418
01:29:25,341 --> 01:29:27,832
Bonnet, my ass.
You on the hood.
1419
01:29:37,153 --> 01:29:39,451
Y'all, I think I hear a car coming.
1420
01:29:39,522 --> 01:29:40,716
Give me your belt.
1421
01:29:45,161 --> 01:29:50,497
This is my cute shit.
Fuck that. Get Abernathy's belt.
1422
01:29:52,334 --> 01:29:54,164
Fine, we'll use Abbie's belt.
1423
01:29:59,507 --> 01:30:02,305
- Give me your belt.
- No. Prada.
1424
01:30:02,377 --> 01:30:04,004
Come on, give her the belt.
1425
01:30:04,078 --> 01:30:07,809
- Magic word.
- Please give her the belt?
1426
01:30:08,850 --> 01:30:10,340
Just 'cause you asked nicely.
1427
01:30:13,054 --> 01:30:14,954
It's nice to be nice, Kim!
1428
01:30:15,023 --> 01:30:16,854
Whatever.
1429
01:30:16,925 --> 01:30:21,328
You know what?
Don't think about asking me to do your hair.
1430
01:30:21,396 --> 01:30:23,830
- Your ass gonna do it.
- You'll ask "pretty please," bitch,
1431
01:30:23,898 --> 01:30:26,764
because that's what you do when no one
else is looking. You ain't that hard.
1432
01:30:26,834 --> 01:30:28,768
- I ain't getting...
- Abernathy.
1433
01:30:28,836 --> 01:30:30,827
Don't get on my nerves right now.
1434
01:30:30,904 --> 01:30:33,338
- I got shit on my mind.
Ooh!
1435
01:30:33,407 --> 01:30:35,500
You know, I ain't six.
1436
01:30:48,455 --> 01:30:50,821
It's cold. Can we roll up
one of these windows?
1437
01:30:50,891 --> 01:30:52,085
KIM and ZOË: No.
1438
01:30:53,627 --> 01:30:56,357
Okay, Abernathy. Check this out.
1439
01:31:08,140 --> 01:31:09,869
What the fuck are you guys doing?
1440
01:31:19,085 --> 01:31:20,518
What does that mean?
1441
01:31:22,555 --> 01:31:25,046
Whoa!
1442
01:31:28,995 --> 01:31:32,362
Faster, you black bitch! Faster!
1443
01:31:39,671 --> 01:31:41,969
That fast enough for your bony ass?
1444
01:31:42,040 --> 01:31:43,769
Whoo-hoo!
1445
01:31:43,842 --> 01:31:46,402
Whoa ho ho ho!
1446
01:31:46,478 --> 01:31:47,467
Oh!
1447
01:31:49,814 --> 01:31:52,305
Abernathy, get your ass up here.
1448
01:31:56,955 --> 01:32:00,118
Whoa! Whoo-hoo!
1449
01:32:00,191 --> 01:32:01,783
Alrighty.
1450
01:32:01,860 --> 01:32:04,021
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
1451
01:32:16,507 --> 01:32:17,974
Go, go! Go!
1452
01:32:18,042 --> 01:32:20,738
Check it out, bitch.
You want it fucking faster?
1453
01:32:35,125 --> 01:32:36,353
Whoo-hoo!
1454
01:32:36,427 --> 01:32:38,395
Yah hoo hoo!
1455
01:32:47,403 --> 01:32:49,496
Yah hoo hoo!
1456
01:33:36,251 --> 01:33:39,948
- Oh, my God.
- What the fuck? Shit.
1457
01:33:46,228 --> 01:33:46,956
Damn it!
1458
01:33:55,936 --> 01:33:57,062
Now.
1459
01:33:58,406 --> 01:34:00,738
Did you do something to him?
Say something?
1460
01:34:00,808 --> 01:34:03,003
Nothing! Shit.
1461
01:34:03,077 --> 01:34:04,874
Here he comes, Zoë.
He's coming!
1462
01:34:04,945 --> 01:34:06,037
Aah!
1463
01:34:08,282 --> 01:34:09,510
Shit, oh shit!
1464
01:34:09,583 --> 01:34:11,016
No!
1465
01:34:11,886 --> 01:34:13,251
Hold on, Zoë!
1466
01:34:22,496 --> 01:34:24,429
Oh, my God. Zoë!
1467
01:34:24,664 --> 01:34:26,859
- Oh! Hold on!
- I can't!
1468
01:34:30,670 --> 01:34:32,399
Fuck you, motherfucker!
1469
01:34:34,107 --> 01:34:37,440
Zoë! Zoë!
1470
01:34:37,510 --> 01:34:40,911
- I'm sorry I called you a black bitch!
- I forgive you. Hold the fuck on!
1471
01:34:40,980 --> 01:34:43,107
Whoa, whoa, get away!
1472
01:34:45,452 --> 01:34:48,114
Oh, shit.
I can't see. I can't see!
1473
01:34:48,188 --> 01:34:49,519
Zoë, move your leg!
1474
01:34:53,293 --> 01:34:55,227
Oh! Come on, come on!
1475
01:34:58,764 --> 01:35:02,291
Redneck lunatic bastard!
Get away from me!
1476
01:35:02,367 --> 01:35:03,356
fucking legs!
1477
01:35:07,940 --> 01:35:09,965
Oh, my God.
1478
01:35:20,219 --> 01:35:23,120
Shit, I'm scared, Kim.
I'm really scared.
1479
01:35:23,188 --> 01:35:24,621
I know, baby, just hold on.
1480
01:35:24,690 --> 01:35:26,555
Watch your feet!
1481
01:35:29,027 --> 01:35:30,255
You wanna get hot?
1482
01:35:30,329 --> 01:35:32,193
- Fucking son of a bitch!
- You wanna get hot?
1483
01:35:33,364 --> 01:35:35,764
Then suck on this for a while, bitch!
1484
01:35:38,836 --> 01:35:41,270
Zoë! Goddamn it!
1485
01:36:07,264 --> 01:36:09,960
Oh, my God. Get away from us,
you cocksucker!
1486
01:36:10,033 --> 01:36:11,500
Leave us alone!
1487
01:36:11,568 --> 01:36:14,833
Fuck you, motherfucker!
Fuck you!
1488
01:36:19,142 --> 01:36:22,009
Zoë! Zoë! Oh, Zoë!
1489
01:36:23,246 --> 01:36:24,975
Hold on!
1490
01:36:47,102 --> 01:36:48,501
Zoë! Zoë!
1491
01:36:56,612 --> 01:36:57,704
Look out!
1492
01:37:26,274 --> 01:37:29,004
Get ready to fly, bitch.
1493
01:37:32,847 --> 01:37:34,508
- Zoë!
- Zoë, hold on!
1494
01:37:41,456 --> 01:37:43,390
He's right on your fucking ass!
1495
01:37:59,273 --> 01:38:00,865
Hey! Whoo-hoo!
1496
01:38:01,775 --> 01:38:05,541
Hey, ladies, that was fun.
1497
01:38:09,916 --> 01:38:12,407
Well, adios.
1498
01:38:12,486 --> 01:38:14,750
Ow! Fuck!
1499
01:38:16,189 --> 01:38:17,622
Shit! Fuck!
1500
01:38:19,359 --> 01:38:21,918
Run away with your ass!
1501
01:38:23,062 --> 01:38:25,223
You better run, motherfucker!
1502
01:38:30,736 --> 01:38:32,363
That bitch!
1503
01:38:48,220 --> 01:38:49,346
I'm okay!
1504
01:38:49,422 --> 01:38:52,653
Oh, shit! Goddamn it!
1505
01:38:52,725 --> 01:38:55,284
Oh, you fuckin' bitch!
1506
01:38:55,360 --> 01:38:59,023
Of course you are.
Of course you are. What was I thinking?
1507
01:39:00,365 --> 01:39:03,425
What was I thinking?
Zoë, the fucking cat!
1508
01:39:07,539 --> 01:39:09,507
Whew. That was a close one.
1509
01:39:12,877 --> 01:39:15,641
So, where's the maniac?
1510
01:39:15,714 --> 01:39:18,581
I shot him and his punk ass sped off.
1511
01:39:19,684 --> 01:39:21,948
You wanna go get him?
1512
01:39:22,020 --> 01:39:24,045
Oh, hell yeah!
1513
01:39:24,122 --> 01:39:25,111
Honey...
1514
01:39:25,990 --> 01:39:27,957
I think you might want to get out.
1515
01:39:29,093 --> 01:39:30,560
Fuck that shit.
1516
01:39:31,795 --> 01:39:33,695
Let's kill this bastard.
1517
01:39:35,666 --> 01:39:38,032
Okay, get your ass in the back.
Let's go.
1518
01:39:44,208 --> 01:39:45,698
Where the fuck you going?
1519
01:39:45,776 --> 01:39:46,765
I'll be back!
1520
01:39:55,085 --> 01:39:57,815
This'll smart. Sweet. Let's go.
1521
01:39:57,888 --> 01:40:01,653
Oh, fuck yeah, bitch.
Come on. Bring that shit.
1522
01:40:03,826 --> 01:40:05,088
Giddy-up, then!
1523
01:40:13,403 --> 01:40:14,836
Yeah!
1524
01:40:46,034 --> 01:40:47,228
God!
1525
01:40:58,713 --> 01:41:01,204
Come on! Come on.
1526
01:41:09,957 --> 01:41:14,758
Why? Oh, no!
1527
01:41:20,067 --> 01:41:21,557
Ah! Do it.
1528
01:41:22,570 --> 01:41:23,969
Do it.
1529
01:41:24,138 --> 01:41:25,127
Do it.
1530
01:41:30,678 --> 01:41:33,613
Oh, no!
1531
01:41:33,681 --> 01:41:35,842
No, no, no!
1532
01:41:35,916 --> 01:41:37,907
No, God!
1533
01:41:38,552 --> 01:41:40,577
All right, get it together, man.
1534
01:41:42,857 --> 01:41:45,416
What did you...
what am I... what are you gonna do?
1535
01:41:51,831 --> 01:41:53,298
Take him down!
1536
01:41:56,803 --> 01:41:59,704
Now where do you think you're going?
Fuckin' fuck you!
1537
01:41:59,772 --> 01:42:01,672
Where do you think
you're fucking going?
1538
01:42:01,741 --> 01:42:03,606
What the fuck do you think...
1539
01:42:07,080 --> 01:42:08,069
Come here!
1540
01:42:15,655 --> 01:42:16,644
Go!
1541
01:42:18,957 --> 01:42:20,515
Whoo-hoo!
1542
01:42:23,629 --> 01:42:26,496
What's wrong with your ass,
motherfucking cocksucker?
1543
01:42:32,504 --> 01:42:36,702
Oh, you're gonna wiggle your ass at me,
gonna wiggle it at me?
1544
01:42:36,775 --> 01:42:41,178
Oh, don't like it up the ass, do you,
you redneck lunatic bastard?
1545
01:42:41,246 --> 01:42:42,474
Aah!
1546
01:42:42,548 --> 01:42:47,542
Oh, yeah, gonna bust a nut
up in this bitch right now!
1547
01:42:47,619 --> 01:42:51,987
Oh, I'm the horniest motherfucker
on the road!
1548
01:42:53,624 --> 01:42:55,353
Boo-yah, bitch!
1549
01:43:00,331 --> 01:43:03,494
Did you just hit a boat?
1550
01:43:06,504 --> 01:43:08,335
Yeah, come on, Kim, get him!
1551
01:43:08,406 --> 01:43:09,566
Get that motherfucker!
1552
01:43:10,274 --> 01:43:13,243
Forget about the cows, motherfucker!
Move, motherfucker, move!
1553
01:43:15,079 --> 01:43:16,569
Motherfucker!
1554
01:43:16,647 --> 01:43:19,548
I'm 'bout to bust a nut up
in this bitch...
1555
01:43:28,124 --> 01:43:30,456
Watch it, watch it.
1556
01:43:36,333 --> 01:43:38,028
# Tapping that ass
tapping that ass #
1557
01:43:38,101 --> 01:43:39,762
# Tapping that tapping that tapping... #
1558
01:43:39,836 --> 01:43:42,396
Aah!
1559
01:43:47,544 --> 01:43:48,670
Bastard.
1560
01:44:03,459 --> 01:44:05,984
Oh, you know I can't let you go...
1561
01:44:06,996 --> 01:44:09,624
without tapping that ass.
1562
01:44:09,698 --> 01:44:11,598
Oh, fuck me!
1563
01:44:11,667 --> 01:44:13,396
- One...
- Kim?
1564
01:44:13,469 --> 01:44:15,460
...more...
- Kim?
1565
01:44:15,537 --> 01:44:17,004
...time!
1566
01:44:17,072 --> 01:44:19,199
Boo-yah!
1567
01:44:23,045 --> 01:44:26,742
That's what I'm talking...
that's what I'm talking about, bitch!
1568
01:45:27,407 --> 01:45:28,999
Oh, come on!
1569
01:45:59,805 --> 01:46:00,794
Yah!
1570
01:46:09,048 --> 01:46:12,347
Yah ha ha, come on!
1571
01:46:12,418 --> 01:46:16,080
Thought you lost us, motherfucker.
We back, motherfucker. We back.
1572
01:46:16,154 --> 01:46:18,213
Who's laughing now, bitch!
1573
01:46:20,625 --> 01:46:21,614
Shit.
1574
01:46:25,463 --> 01:46:26,452
Come on!
1575
01:46:27,699 --> 01:46:31,795
Here's Cha Cha!
1576
01:46:31,870 --> 01:46:33,770
You've been such a lunatic bastard!
1577
01:46:33,838 --> 01:46:35,567
I'm sorry!
1578
01:46:35,640 --> 01:46:36,629
What?
1579
01:46:36,708 --> 01:46:40,769
I didn't mean anything.
I was just playing around.
1580
01:46:40,845 --> 01:46:44,110
Oh, he was just playing around!
1581
01:46:44,182 --> 01:46:46,707
- Just playing!
- Well, I ain't playing with you!
1582
01:46:46,785 --> 01:46:48,217
Whoa!
1583
01:46:52,956 --> 01:46:55,117
Oh, look out, look out, look out.
1584
01:47:03,200 --> 01:47:05,430
What's your sign?
1585
01:47:05,502 --> 01:47:06,491
Oh, shit!
1586
01:47:09,807 --> 01:47:11,638
Oh, shit.
1587
01:47:11,708 --> 01:47:14,575
Don't run, don't run,
motherfucker, don't run.
1588
01:47:14,645 --> 01:47:16,169
This baby's on speed!
1589
01:47:23,352 --> 01:47:24,785
Whoa!
1590
01:47:26,155 --> 01:47:28,453
- Aah!
- Yeah, yeah!
1591
01:47:32,495 --> 01:47:34,122
Yeah!
1592
01:47:34,197 --> 01:47:37,530
Jesus fucking Christ,
it's about time.
1593
01:47:52,782 --> 01:47:54,943
Go, go, go, go, go, go!
1594
01:47:57,519 --> 01:47:58,884
Please don't dead-end.
1595
01:47:59,054 --> 01:48:00,453
Please don't dead end.
1596
01:48:00,589 --> 01:48:01,988
Please don't dead-end.
1597
01:48:02,757 --> 01:48:04,247
Please don't dead-end.
1598
01:48:04,392 --> 01:48:05,381
Please don't dead-end.
1599
01:48:05,560 --> 01:48:07,357
Please don't dead-end.
1600
01:48:07,529 --> 01:48:08,757
Please don't dead-end.
1601
01:48:08,897 --> 01:48:10,296
Please don't dead-end.
1602
01:48:10,365 --> 01:48:12,162
Oh, there the motherfucker is.
1603
01:48:12,234 --> 01:48:13,223
Go, go, go!
1604
01:48:13,301 --> 01:48:14,734
Get him, get him, get him!
1605
01:48:14,803 --> 01:48:15,997
Unh!
1606
01:48:32,219 --> 01:48:33,914
Oh, help me!
1607
01:48:45,699 --> 01:48:47,496
Be careful. My right arm's broken.
1608
01:48:47,568 --> 01:48:48,557
This one?
1609
01:48:51,939 --> 01:48:53,736
Oh, you want some shit?
1610
01:48:53,807 --> 01:48:55,934
Motherfucker, kiss my fucking ass.
1611
01:48:59,647 --> 01:49:00,841
Uhn!
1612
01:49:04,484 --> 01:49:05,382
Yah!
1613
01:49:11,190 --> 01:49:12,521
Mother... fucker!
1614
01:49:13,059 --> 01:49:14,856
Motherfucker!
1615
01:49:19,766 --> 01:49:20,755
Asshole!