*** Subtitles by dylux ***
Surprise!
Happy Birthday, daddy!
♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪
♪ Happy Birthday, dear Daddy Happy Birthday to you! ♪
Make a wish!
I wish... I'm not gonna tell you.
Aw, come on, blow them out! Yeah!!
Give me some sugar, girl.
One more candle and the smoke alarm would've gone off.
The big 5-0.
You know what? Your beard's getting gray. Kinda makes you look old.
But it's all right, though, cause I still love you.
Bye, pa.
- Good morning! - Hi, hi!
What's up?
- Where's Rianne? - She's upstairs.
Okay.
- Good morning. - Good morning.
- That's my bacon! - Well, it's mine now.
Hey, don't you close doors around here?
Baby, what's this on my tie?
That is an ugly spot.
Thanks. Sharp as a tack.
- I'm thinking of going on Jeopardy. - All right.
Just don't take any questions about cooking.
Don't step in the egg!
Where is my thinking? I should have checked the floor for egg!
Honey... Do you know a man named, uh... Michael Hunsaker?
Michael Hunsaker...
Jesus! Michael Hunsaker!
- What did he want? - Your office called.
He's been trying to reach you for three days now.
I haven't talked to him in...
twelve years!
Hell, well, no... Wait-wait a minute.
That would make me...
Fifty!
So that means that you're...
We're not gonna discuss that.
- Forget the eggs. - Okay.
- Roger? - Yeah, baby.
How come I never heard of Michael Hunsaker?
Huh, I just never talked about him, hm?
- Vietnam buddy? - Yeah.
Hey, hey, eat your own cake. Vietnam buddy.
- Daddy! - Yeah, baby.
Nick and the kids left without me.
He left without you? Come on, I never get enough of my baby.
Daddy, this is my New Year's Eve dress. Don't you like it? Isn't it cool?
It's beautiful.
Have a good birthday.
Goddamn heartbreaker!
Happy Birthday, Rog!
- What do we got here? - Oh, we got a... hooker.
No, it's Dixie. Would you please tell these bozos to lay off, please?
Hey, hey, you bozos, lay off.
Had a jumper here last night. Think she was walking by, saw the whole thing.
You guys take her statement and send her home.
All right, thanks. I'm beat. You know how it is.
Yeah, sure.
All dressed up, and no one to blow.
You're hilarious! I can't believe you damn cops!
Uh, the jumper's name is Amanda Hunsaker.
Age 22.
Prostitute. Let's se: one arrest, no convictions. Born in Tennessee...
- Parents... - What-what was the name?
- Hunsaker. - Yeah, yeah. The parents.
- Oh, parents. Michael and Claire. - ...Claire.
You know 'em?
Right. Find out who bought it, who... who's-who's paying the bills.
- That will take some looking into. - So look!
Yeah.
Hello, honey.
Yeah. Give me the number for... Michael Hunsaker.
- The man we talked about? - What?
- Your Vietnam buddy? - Yeah, yeah.
- You just mentioned him this morning. - What's wrong?
His daughter just dove out a window.
- God. It's terrible. - Yeah.
I got it.
Good, huh? Tasty? Smooth?
- Yeah, that's good. - You better fucking believe it.
Thanks.
Okay, so let's do it. How much?
How much for how much?
For all of it.
- You want it all? - Yeah.
- He wants it all. - He wants it all... Beautiful.
- All right! - Congratulations!
Maybe a nice six-footer to put it under, huh?
- You want a tree? - Yeah.
I'll tell you what.
I'll give you the best tree I got on the lot for nothing.
- Hey, thanks. - But the shit's gonna cost you, uh...
- a hundred. - Come on, that much?
Hey, you said you liked it. That's a fair price.
Yeah. Yeah. Hell, you only live once.
Get this together here.
20, 40...
50, 70...
- What the fuck? - Hey, man!
- Hey! - Come on. Shut up, man, I'm losing count.
... 93, 94, 95, 96...
Forget it, dumbshit!
One hundred thousand!
One hundred thousand dollars!
- You... you digin' what he said? - A hundred thousand?
I... I'm sorry, I can't afford that.
Not on my salary. But look, I tell you what, I got a better idea.
Now, let me say I, uh, I take the whole stash off your hands for free...
you assholes go to jail. What do you say about that?
Now, I could read you guys your rights,
but, nah, you guys already know what your rights are, don't you?
This badge ain't real.
You ain't real.
No, you sure are a crazy son of a bitch.
- You think I'm crazy? - Yeah.
- I think... - You call me crazy, you think I am crazy?
Yeah.
Hey, you wanna see crazy? I'll show you...
Now, that's a real badge, I'm a real cop and this is a real fucking gun.
Okay, pal.
Hey, noses in the dirt, assholes!
Where's your buddy? Where's your buddy?
What do you got, Riggs?
There's three down and one loose in here. He's got black hair and a red shirt.
- Okay, let's go. - I'm covering left side.
Freeze! Freeze! Give me the gun! Up, up!
How that feel, sucker?
- Hey, shoot him! - Drop it, prick!
Hey, shoot him! Shoot him! Shoot him!
- Shut the fuck up! - Somebody shoot this prick!
Freeze!
Shoot him! Somebody shoot this prick!
Shoot me. Shoot me. Shoot me.
- Shut up! - Put them down!
- I warn you! I'm going to shoot you! - Shoot him!
Shut the fuck up! Shut up!
Shoot me! Shoot him!
Get him out of there.
It ain't worth it, man.
Hey, wait up already!
Merry Christmas!
I miss you... Victoria Lynn.
Yeah, that's silly, isn't it?
I'll see you later.
I'll see you much later.
Once more with feeling on three.
Damn it, Cooley. Do it on three, or go on the street.
Are you telling me you think Riggs is playing some kind of a game?
Sure. He wants the cash. I've seen that a hundred times.
But he'll come around.
That's a very dangerous attitude to take, captain.
May I remind you that his wife of 11 years
was recently killed in a car accident.
- He's also been known to pull his gun... - I know all about Riggs.
- ... not enough. - He's a tough bastard, all right?
He's on the edge, sir. I'm telling you, he may be psychotic.
- That's a bunch of psych bullshit. - Really?
You're making a mistake by keeping him in the field, okay?
The man is suicidal.
And you're sure of that diagnosis? You have no doubts? You know that?
No, there are no absolutes in life.
End of discussion. We're gonna wait.
If he offs himself, then we'll know I was wrong.
You're making a mistake, because if you're wrong...
Excuse me. Yeah?
Asshole.
You know, Roger, you're way behind the times.
The guys in the 80's aren't tough. They're sensitive people.
They show emotions around women, shit like that.
I think I'm an 80's man.
How do you figure?
Last night...
I cried in bed. How's that?
Were you with a woman?
I was alone. Why do you think I was crying? Merry Christmas.
- Sounds like an 80's man to me. - Yeah.
- Got some news on the Hunsaker case, Rog. - That was quick.
So was the autopsy. They're not calling it a suicide.
What?
Surprise, surprise. First off, coroner found evidence she used barbiturates.
Brilliant detective work.
There were pills all over the place.
Right, right. That-that-that's not the surprise.
The surprise is someone doctored the pills.
Jesus.
Every capsule is loaded with drain cleaner.
She hadn't jumped, she would have been dead inside 15 minutes.
This case stinks.
Hey, Rog, you know, you looked younger with the beard.
Thanks, captain.
You shaved the beard.
Some detective.
- There are two more things. - Shoot.
First, condition of the sheets and the mattress indicate that
someone else was in the bed with Amanda,
just before she died. That's "A".
What's "B"?
"B" is I'm supposed to tell you you're breaking in a new partner on this.
Partner again?
Yeah. Some cat that's on the loan from Dope.
Real burnout, on the ragged edge.
- Oh, perfect. - Yeah.
Gun!
Rog, meet your new partner.
I'm too old for this shit.
There are those who say you're a good cop.
I try.
I heard about the little stunt yesterday. Pretty heroic.
I pulled your file.
Said you worked in the Phoenix project in Vietnam. That right?
Uh-huh.
Assassination stuff. It's over, you know.
What is?
- The war. - Ah, yes, I know.
Just thought I'd remind you.
That's some serious shit you carry.
Be my guest.
Um. 9mm Beretta. Takes 15 in the mag, one up the pipe,
wide ejection port, no feed jams.
What you got in there?
Four-inch Smith.
Six-shooter, huh?
A lot of old-timers carry those.
File also said you're heavy into martial arts.
Tai chi and all that, uh... killer stuff.
I suppose we have to register you as a lethal weapon.
Hey, look, friend. Let's just cut the shit. Now, we both know why I was transferred.
Everybody thinks I'm suicidal, in which case I'm fucked
and nobody wants to work with me.
Well, they think I'm faking to draw psycho pension
in which case I'm fucked and nobody wants to work with me.
- Basically, I'm fucked. - Guess what?
- What? - I don't wanna work with you.
Hey, don't.
Ain't got no choice. Looks like we both got fucked.
Terrific.
God hates me, that's what it is.
Hate Him back. Works for me.
- Good afternoon, Mr. Mendez. - Yeah, how you doin'?
Did you pat him down, Mr. Lodge?
Oh, hey, man, we went through this act already.
Go through it again.
Who are you?
That's hardly important, but if it matters, you may call me Mr. Joshua.
Let's go.
Great, swell. Mr. Joshua, huh?
General, Mr. Mendez is here.
You call this music? I can get that ten times as good for half the price.
Now, I wanna pack this place and I don't wanna hear any of this shit.
Now, let's get it right.
Ah, Mr. Mendez, how are you?
Hey, I'm fine.
Where the hell did you get him? Psychos-R-Us?
I don't think you're funny.
I don't think this whole goddamn setup's funny.
You're using mercenaries, for Christ's sake. Tell me I'm wrong!
No, you're not wrong.
And you expect me to trust these fucking bozos?
My people are loyal, Mr. Mendez. They are loyal to me.
Oh, ho-ho, bullshit.
Do you smoke?
Hey, what's that got to do with anything? Do I smoke...
- Do you smoke?! - Yeah.
Give me your lighter.
- My-my lighter? - Your lighter!
Yeah, okay. Right here.
Here. Take it.
Hey, man, what the fuck is wrong with you guys?
Shut your mouth!
Shut up!
And don't move.
Oh, hey, man...
Mr. Joshua, your left arm, please.
Oh, hey, you guys are fucking gone. You know what I am saying?
Oh, Jesus Christ, man!
You guys are fucking crazy, man. Come on, man!
Have Endo look into that, Mr. Joshua.
Yes, sir.
You wish to do business with us, yes?
Jesus Christ!
You wish to make a purchase, yes?
Uh, yeah. Yes, yes! Jesus Christ, yes. Yeah.
You know, you guys are out there like fucking Pluto, man. You're gone!
The bulk of the heroin will be here Friday night.
We'll make delivery at that time.
Have the money ready, and no tricks.
If you try anything, you'll have to talk to Mr. Joshua.
Yeah, right. Joshua. Yeah, right, I got you. Yeah.
Merry Christmas.
Yeah, right. M-m-merry... You too, pal.
Mike...
the autopsy report showed that Amanda was poisoned.
Even if she hadn't jumped, she'd still be dead.
- She was murdered. - Murdered?!
Jesus!
I can't take this. I just can't take this.
Mike. Why did you try to get in touch with me?
Well, I heard that you were...
Somebody told me you were working out here.
I thought maybe you could get her out.
Get her out of what?
Get her out of the stuff... she was into. She was making, uh...
videotapes.
Pornographic...
videotapes. And I...
I thought maybe you c-- you just get her out. Help her.
E-easy, Mike. Easy.
You owe me, Roger.
Remember?
Yeah. I remember.
I want you to find whoever's responsible for this...
however many of them there are.
Please, I know you can do it. Just find them... and kill them.
Mike, I'm a police officer.
I don't give a shit you're a police officer, Roger!
I know you're a fucking police officer.
Kill them! Just kill them!
Wait. Wait, Rog. Rog!
Come on. You find them, you find them and you kill them.
You can do that. You owe me.
Yeah. I owe you.
Gotta go, man.
Hey, what did he mean when he said you owed 'im?
Uh, we served together in 1965.
La Drang Valley. Saved my life. Took a bayonet in the lungs.
- Well, that was nice of 'im. - Yeah, I thought so.
Come on, you want me to drive?
Ah, no, you're supposed to be suicidal, remember?
Anybody who drives in this town is suicidal.
All units, 7-A-21, possible jumper at the corner of Santa Monica and Orlando.
7-A-21, handle code two.
- All units, come in, please. All units. - Gotcha!
Ub, ub... Hey, what's the number of your car here?
Uh, 3-William-56.
3-William-56 en route. I love this job! It's so exciting!
Copy. Police psychologist on the way.
Hey, boss, can we put the sirens on? Huh?
Hey, guys, I'm glad you're here.
- Where's the psychologist? - Stuck in the traffic.
Swell. Hey, who is this guy?
Salesman name is McCleary. He was at some office party,
walked upstairs and went outside.
- You think he'll go? - Seems serious enough. Who knows?
All right, people.
- I can handle this. - You qualified to talk to jumpers?
- I've done it before. - Okay, you're elected.
Hey, hey! No guns, no jiu jitsu, just bring him down.
Roger.
- What? - Uh, 10-4.
Get back there, get back there. Thank you.
- Who are you? - Riggs, Homicide.
Yes, sir. He's right over there on the ledge.
Merry Christmas.
Leave me alone! Leave me alone! Leave me alone!
- Why are you doing this? - None of your goddamn business!
Fair enough. Um...
Look, I'm... I'm just gonna come out there, okay?
No! No, don't! You... you touch me, I'm gonna jump!
- Stay there! - Take it easy. For chrissake, take it easy!
I don't like this any better than you do. I'm scared too, okay?
I can't stand heights. I mean, when getting this far... this makes me dizzy, all right?
Give me a chance to calm down. I just wanna talk to you, okay?
I just wanna talk.
I'm just gonna stand out here on the ledge with you.
No, don't... go. Not out on the ledge.
Uh, you know, you're-you're not the first guy to think of this, you know?
Uh, a lot of people got problems especially during the silly season like now.
- You know shit! - No, you're wrong, pal, you're wrong.
You don't know nothing! Don't touch me!
- Take it easy. - Look, I didn't do anything wrong!
I know that. It's not like you're murdering anyone or anything.
- That's right! - That's right.
- The only one I hurt is me! - Same way I look...
Me!
That's right. I know you're hurting. I get it. Okay, now.
- Come on. - D-don't-don't come near me!
C'mon. Give me a break, will you, guy?
My boss is down there and he's watching me.
I gotta make it look at least like I'm trying to save you, okay?
Come on.
It's... I'm just gonna stand here and talk to you. That's all.
You won't... you won't try nothing?
No, no, I-I... I'm square with you.
I-I won't try a thing. I won't try a damn thing.
You think I want to fall off? I promise, I'll just talk to you.
Okay. Okay, all right.
Here, you want a... you want a cigarette? Come on, let's smoke, okay?
- Yeah. - Go on, take it. Yeah.
I mean, take our time and both die of cancer.
Here.
- Think I'll leave you without. - Hey, what're you doing?
- Oh, no! - What are you doing?
See this key? Bye-bye!
You're crazy!
Now, you can jump, if you want to,
but you'd be taking me with you, and that makes you a murderer.
Okay? Come on, let's go back.
- You bastard! - Yeah, you'd be killing a cop.
Yeah, I'd be killin' a psycho nut cop!
Yeah, a psycho, but I'm still a cop. You coming in? Come on, I'm goin' in.
- Fuck you. I'm jumping! - Do you really wanna jump?
Do you wanna? Well, then, that's fine with me. Come on!
Let's do it, asshole. Let's do it.
- What, with me? - I wanna do it. I wanna do it.
Shit!
- Help! - Wanna go up again? Let's go again.
Come on, it was great.
Help me! Help me loose!
He's been trying to kill me!
Did you see that? He's out of his mind! He's crazy!
Hey, those are my cuffs. I want them back.
- Don't you touch me! - Hey, what the fuck you just do?
Well, I controlled the jump! You wanted him down? He's down!
- Hey, come here! - Come where?
Come here with me!
Get in here!
Hey, o-okay, no bullshit! You wanna kill yourself?
Oh, for Christ sake...
Shut up! Yes or no? You wanna die?
I got the job done!
Just answer the question!
What do you wanna hear, man?
Do you wanna hear that sometimes I think about eating a bullet?
Well, I do!
I do. I even got a special one for the occasion, with a hollow point.
Look! Make sure it blows the back of my goddamn head out!
Do the job right.
Every single day I wake up and I think of a reason not to do it.
Every single day.
And you know why I don't do it? This is gonna make you laugh.
You know why I don't do it?
The job. Doing the job. Now that's the reason.
You-you wanna die!
I don't. I'm not afraid of it. I ain't afraid of it.
Here, take my gun. Don't nibble on the barrel, pull the trigger.
Go ahead, pal, be my guest! Go ahead, if you're serious!
You shouldn't tempt me, man.
Put in your mouth. Bullet might go through your ear and not kill you.
Yeah, under the chin's just as good, yeah!
You're not trying to draw... a psycho pension.
You really are crazy.
I'm hungry. I'm gonna go and get somethin' to eat.
Shit. Oh, God.
I don't know. He's... he's hurting, he's in pain.
There's something eating away at this guy.
I think he's on the edge.
I think Riggs has a death wish, that's what it is.
Terrific. So you're saying I should worry?
Oh... Yeah, I think you should worry.
When he goes, you don't wanna be anywhere near 'im.
Thank you, doctor. You've been very, very helpful.
You're welcome.
I'm too old for this shit.
- You hungry? - No! I'm not hungry.
- Want me to drive? - No! I'll drive!
- All right. - You get in that side!
You drive.
You get a bad personal phone call or somethin'?
What happened? Did the stock market crash?
Don't worry. Here, have a french fry.
Fifty years old. What a birthday. Goddamn, fifty years old!
Been on the force 20 years, not a scratch on me, not a scar. Got a wife, kids...
house, fishing boat. I'll kiss all that goodbye
because my new partner has a death wish.
My fucking life is over.
It's just you just shut up here!
And why are you talking to me anyway? I'm a dead man!
You are fucking looking at a dead man here.
Wa-wa-watch!
Now, don't worry. You know, I was driving
before you were an itch in your daddy's pants.
- I didn't know that. - Know what?
I didn't know that it was your birthday today.
Yeah, well, it was yesterday.
Oh. Oh, happy... you know, happy Birthday for yesterday.
I'm since... I... Sincerely, Happy Birthday, man.
Thanks.
Maybe we'll stay alive long enough for me to buy you a present.
I mean, you know, don't thank me now.
It's-it's-it's the least I can do after all the kindness that you shown me.
Hey, are you gonna tell me where we're going?
We're together on this, right?
Beverly Hills. We got an address on Amanda Hunsaker's meal ticket.
But... remember, he's not a suspect yet.
So we question him, not damage him, okay?
Oh, sure, yeah. Okay. I won't hurt 'im. I'll let you do all the talking.
Let me do all the talking. Let me do all the talking. Okay?
- Experience counts here. - Yeah.
- You're not gonna smoke in the car. - Well, I am.
What? Does this bother you? I mean, I'll put it out if it bothers you.
Yeah, it bothers me.
- Does it? - Yeah.
I'm gonna open a window. Will that make you happy?
Now, that's not the point, you know.
I have to watch out for my lungs,
you know, uh, uh, exercise and take care of myself.
4241 comin'... up.
Bingo.
- But do we have a warrant to go in here? - We don't need one with the gate club.
Oh... Didn't take them long, huh?
Hey, guys, go on in! Make yourselves at home!
- Thank you. - Merry Christmas!
- Merry Christmas. - Yeah, merry Christmas.
Don't need a warrant with an invitation.
I've seen this place on "Lifestyles of the Rich and Shameless".
Get the door.
- Nice and easy. - Nice and easy...
- Looks like the Garden of Eden. - Look at this!
Paradise.
Ah, isn't that sweet?
I'm thinking probable cause.
Get the girls!
Okay, asshole!
Move! Come on! Get out!
Fast! Move!
Get your hands on that tree and face each other! Let me see your face!
Come on. Hands in front of you! Face down.
Oh, my leg, man.
Don't move it, sweetheart, or I'll break your arm.
Got them!
Show me your hands! Let me see 'em.
Right now, wanna see 'em! Right now!
Put your hands out there! Put your hands out there! Let me see your hands!
See how easy that was?
Boom! Still alive. Now we question him. You know why we question 'im?
Cause I got 'im in the leg. I didn't shoot him full of holes
or try to jump off a building with 'im.
Well, that's no fair. The building guy lived.
Now, whatever. The point being, no killing.
- No killing, right. - Right.
Piece of cake. Now I'm happy.
Read 'im his rights. I'll stand over here being happy.
He's got a gun!
Oops!
You ever met anybody... you didn't kill?
Well, I haven't killed you yet.
Well, don't do me no favors.
Don't you worry.
The coroner gave the body a ride downtown.
I, uh... I guess we can get out of here.
Look, uh... I'm sorry about all the shit I said out there.
You saved my life. Thank you.
- I bet that hurt to say. - You'll never know.
A'ight, a'ight. Come on, let's-let's get a bite.
Get my shoes on.
- Mom, Rog is coming. - Okay, Carrie.
Oh!! Here's my little welcoming committee!
Hi. Where's my daughter? Which one...?
- Come on, daddy. - Oh, this one's my daughter!
But, you, home, both of you. Home. Dinnertime.
- How are you doing? - I am doing all right. How are you?
Is that a crook?
Uh, no, this is my new partner, Martin.
Hi.
I'm glad you're home at a sensible hour.
Well, I try to be a sensible dad. You know?
Come on in, Martin.
Yeah, close the door.
- Hello, Nick. - Hey, dad.
Get your legs off the arm of the couch.
Hi, hey, hey, hey. How you doing? Where's mommy?
In the kitchen. Let's sneak up on mommy.
- Hello, baby! - Hi, honey.
I want you to meet...
I'd like you to meet, um, daddy's new partner.
- Martin. Martin Riggs. - Hi, how are you?
- Uh, this is my wife, Trish. - Pleased to meet you.
Martin's gonna join us for dinner.
- Roast okay with you? - What's for dinner?
We'll see what's for dinner.
This is a brown, sticky... ouch! Oo-hoo-hoo.
It's roast.
Uhh, how's a brown, roast-like substance?
- Roger... you're being an asshole. - I try not to be.
- You want something to drink, Martin? - What do you got?
We have Canadian Mist...
- You like Canadian Mist? - Honey, it's in the back.
Canadian Mist in the back.
Uh, dear, how come we didn't have fish tonight?
I thought we had fish tonight.
Don't worry about the fish.
Ooh, getting defensive about it. You-you ever go fishing?
Oh, not since I was a kid. I used to go spearfishing and snorkle.
Spearfishing....
Didn't catch very much but a cold.
I got that big old boat out there.
Rianne, get the dessert.
Rianne! Your mother said, get the dessert.
- Get the dessert. Get to it! - Shut up.
Catalina Island. Nothing exciting, but I catch my allotment.
It's not bad. You can catch a little few things out there.
That's where I caught my wife out there.
Yes. But it's nice fishing out there.
Mr. Riggs, would you like a tart?
Thank you, yes. Call me Martin.
- Martin. - Uh... Listen. Mr. Riggs.
Sit down.
Rianne, this is not the first time we've had company.
You could have fooled me.
♪ My name is Carrie, I'm no fairy My sister's cherry ♪
♪ She's in love with a guy named Martin-- ♪
Nicholas!
Come on. It was really good!
Yeah, dad! Why don't you try it?
It was good.
Yeah, there you go.
♪ I'm gonna find a partner My name is Roger ♪
♪ And I need to be a modger And a secret hodger ♪
You need some help.
I am awful!
Hey, sarge! Thanks for taking out the garbage.
But, honey, I'm... I'm entertaining our guest.
So, what you think?
Oh, uh, it's-it's nice. You. uh, know anything about boats?
- I know what they cost. - Come on, I mean, can you sail this thing?
What's wrong with you? It's not a sailboat.
Oh, yeah, that's what I thought.
There's no trick to it. You know, that's the front, that's the back, water all around...
Why you gotta make things so complicated?
- Here. - Thanks.
I don't make things complicated. That's just the way things get all by themselves.
Yeah. You mean Amanda Hunsaker's murder, huh?
Did I mention that? I didn't mention it, did I?
Didn't have to say a word. I can read your mind.
I don't get it. What's the matter with you?
What?
- Why is there a problem? - There's no problem.
You got one dead girl, one dead guy.
The dead guy kills the dead girl. We kill the dead guy
cause he wants us to be dead guys. It's pretty easy to me.
That's pretty easy for you to say.
Look. A sugar daddy is dealing drugs.
She said something, or did something or saw something
she wasn't supposed to.
He pitches her off the balcony into the sweet by-and-by.
That's why he came at us with a shotgun this afternoon.
Yes, I'm sorry. It's just a little too easy, you know,
just too neat. I can't swallow it.
Of course it's neat. What's wrong with neat? I like neat.
By "neat", you mean simple.
- You okay? - Watch out!
What button did you push?
Where-where-where's my manual?
Is this what you're looking for, captain?
You asshole!
Daddy! Didn't mean to interrupt one of those intellectual conversations...
What is it, Rianne?
Mark asked me to a club tomorrow night.
- Uh, you're grounded. You know that. - Please, daddy?
Mark? Which one is Mark?
- You know, the blond one. - The one with pits in his face?
Those are dimples.
Those are pits. When he smiles, I can see through his head.
The answer is no. End of story.
Oh, come on, Rog. Have a heart.
Hey, good buddy. She smoked pot in the house. She's grounded.
Next time I'll just take a beer and so.
Why can I have a beer and I can't smoke a joint?
It's not coke, you know.
Oh, okay, I'll tell you why. Because now, at this moment...
beer is legal, grass ain't. Right or wrong?
- It's wrong. - Right.
Right.
They sit there drinking six-packs and I get grounded.
I'm gonna go home.
I must strain. We resolve anything here tonight?
Yeah, we resolved plenty.
It's we resolve that your wife takes out the garbage,
your daughter smokes grass in the house and it's illegal,
and you don't know a hell of a lot about boats.
You-you got a hell of a nice family there.
Thank you.
Well, there, I enjoyed the meal. Thanks a lot.
Bullshit. But... thanks anyway.
You don't trust me at all, do you?
I tell you what. You make it through tomorrow, without killing anybody,
especially me or yourself, then I'll start trusting you.
Fair enough.
I do it real good, you know?
Do what?
When I was 19, I did a guy in Laos from 1,000 yards out.
A rifle shot in high wind.
Maybe eight or...
even ten guys in the world could have made that shot.
It's the only thing I was ever good at.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Yeah, yeah, see you.
- Hey, hey, Riggs. - Yo.
You really like my wife's cooking?
No.
See you tomorrow.
Get-get out of there, Burbank.
Oh, this is cute.
What have we got here? "Police evidence."
Morning, Roger. Here, have some coffee.
Hey, Roger, I've been doing a little thinking.
I've been doing a lot of thinking actually about the night Amanda Hunsaker died.
- How did you get in? - Uh, Trish let me in.
- What time is it? - Uh, it's daytime.
Listen, about the night Amanda Hunsaker died, she...
What was the name of that hooker who witnessed the jump?
Come on, we gotta get up and catch bad guys today.
- I'll get a shower. - Yeah.
What was the name of that hooker?
You know, the one who witnessed the jump.
Vulch of Vice says Century City
- is not her usual turf. - Dixie! Her name is Dixie!
And give-give me that cup. And-and-and get out of here!
Someone was in bed with Amanda Hunsaker the night she died.
Why, up till now, we assumed it was a man.
Okay, suppose it was Dixie.
Okay. Disgusting, but okay. Let's say Dixie put the drain cleaner in her pills.
- Say someone paid her to do it. - Sure.
She thinks, "Fine, Amanda swallows a couple o' downers and... she's dead."
- Then Dixie... - If it was her.
If it was her. She's got plenty o' time
to spritz the place up... get out. Whatever.
E-except Amanda jumps out the window.
Or Dixie pushes her. You know, either way.
Either way, she has to make a quick exit because the body's public.
So she hauls ass downstairs.
People are comin' out, saying, "What's happened What's happened?"
Somebody spots her, and she says, "Shit!"
That's right, she actually stops and says, "Shit!"
The point being that now she has to cover her ass.
Right.
So she grabs the nearest flatfoot she can find
and she says, "Officer, officer, I saw the whole thing."
- Right. - Right.
Nah, that's pretty fucking thin.
That's very thin.
Now, what the hell? Thin's my middle name.
Yeah, your wife's cooking, I'm not surprised.
- What? - Nothin'.
Remarks like that will not get you invited to Christmas dinner.
My luck's changing for the better every day.
All right, baby, come to Roger. Come on.
Center mass. Center mass.
Read them and weep.
What do you do? Sleep with that thing on your pillow?
I would if I slept.
Step back, baby. Let me show what an old man can do.
Just warming up, just warming up.
Watch carefully.
Hey! Look at that, will you? Not bad for an old man.
Step aside, old man.
Have a nice day.
Shit!
Uh-huh, the policemen are here!
Yeah, you're right. Hello, policemen!
Hi.
- Hi. How you doing? - Fine.
Are you going to bust Dixie?
Oh, no, we're just going over there for a cup of coffee.
Yeah. We're going over here to have breakfast.
You're gonna bust Dixie! You're gonna bust Dixie!
- Like I said, thin. - Probably nothing.
Wow, did you see that? Wasn't that great?
What are you, a fag?
- Your coat's on fire! - Shit.
- Probably nothing. - Thin. Very thin.
You guys okay? Got all your fingers and toes?
Three William 56.
We got a fire and explosion at 111th and Larch.
Request ambulance and fire department.
Do it again! Do it again!
- Okay. - Give me a break, guys.
Enough, enough, enough!
Do you think Dixie was home?
What you got?
Part of the device.
Oh, this is artwork. This is goddamn artwork.
Well, I'm glad you like it.
You don't get it. This is real pro stuff.
I haven't seen anything like this since the war.
C-come again, come on!
The CIA, they used to hire mercs. They used the exact same setup.
Mercury switches, gaflooey! That's heavy shit.
Sarge!
I think we got something over here. The detective wants to see you.
Okay, here it is.
Bunch o' kids playing this mornin',
one saw a guy checking the meter.
- Where? - Here at Dixie's.
He was playing some kind of game, hiding under the porch.
Says he saw the guy pretty good, too.
It could be a break.
Oh, what do you know, those kids are six years old.
If they are.
- You call the gas company? - Sure did.
No one's supposed to check that meter for at least another month.
- Let me handle this. - Be my guest.
He's the little fellow that saw the guy.
Hiiii! My name is Detective Murtaugh. What's yours?
Don't tell him your name.
Don't tell 'im your name, he's gonna put you in jail.
And you won't see your mom.
No, no, no. It's all right. I'm not gonna put you in jail.
Come on, what's your name?
- Don't tell him, Alfred. - Alfred!
Ah, this is Alfred! Hey, meet Alfred. This is Alfred.
Alfred, hi! How old are you, Alfred?
Six.
Six years old. I bet you like Go-Bots.
Is that a real gun?
Yeah, yes, this is a real gun.
Do you kill people?
No. If some guy is hurting someone,
I try to shoot him in the leg or something,
just to stop 'im.
Mama says policemen shoot black people.
- Is it true? - Yeah, is it true?
Is that true?
Maybe we... ought to get the kids some...
Ice cream.
You like ice cream?
- Yeah, yeah, ice cream. - Ice cream. Icre cream.
No. No, no. no. Not... not you, Alfred.
Now, Alfred... The man you saw, the meter man,
you get a good look at 'im?
- I saw him. - Great!
Picture him in your head. Close your eyes.
And think what he looks like.
- Got it? - Mm-hmm.
- Can you draw him? - Mm-hmm.
Give me some drawing paper and crayons, okay, brother.
Hurry up.
- This is good. I like this. - Can it, man.
No, we're gonna put out an APB on Big Bird.
- That's very funny. - Yeah.
"Attention, all units. Large yellow bird, silly voice."
Uhh, you're hilarious, Martin. It's enough.
Okay. Tell me what he looks like.
Was he black?
- Was he white? - Uh-huh.
Oh, he's white. Okay. Was he tall?
Tall like me?
What color was his hair? Was it brown?
Black?
Blond?
Blond. His hair was blond.
What, uh... What did he have on? Jeans? He have jeans on?
It was paint.
- Pained? - Pained?
- Pained. - I don't know.
Pained... P-p-painted?
Painted. A-a tattoo?
Tattoo? Uh, like-like Popeye? Like Popeye?
A tattoo like Popeye? Oh, not like Popeye.
It was that.
Like that?
Exactly like that?
Mm-hmm. I saw it good. This is it.
I remember.
Are you sure?
It had a knife, even.
Roger, that's a Special Forces tattoo.
- Really? - Yeah.
A Special Forces tattoo, mercury switches...
What the hell have we gotten into here?
Yeah... Yeah.
Wonder if there's an opening in the L.A. fire department.
You wanna tell me about it?
- Tell you about what? - Don't bullshit me.
Your daughter wasn't killed because of something she was into.
She was killed for something you're into.
Stop me if I'm wrong.
Roger, I don't know what the hell you are talking about.
Hey, Mike.
Keep your hands away from your pocket, okay?
- Take it easy, man. - Fuck easy.
When you called me the other day you're gonna blow the whistle, right?
Blow the whistle on what?
You were gonna spill your guts, so they killed your daughter.
Tell me if I'm wrong. Hey, talk to me!
They killed your daughter.
They paid off a hooker to poison your little girl. Talk to me!
Chrissake, Roger! I've got another daughter.
She'll be protected.
You can't protect her. You don't know these people.
Acquaint me with them.
It goes all the way back to the war.
I ended up working with a group called "Air America". CIA front.
They secretly ran the entire war out of Laos.
I was with a special unit called "Shadow Company".
Murks, trained killers.
When Charlie was bringing in heroin to finance the... VC government,
Shadow Company went in, we burned the whole thing down.
We killed everybody.
- We also formed a plan. - Keep talking.
A couple years ago, Shadow Company got together again.
The war was over.
But we still had our list of sources in Asia.
- Yeah? - And we've been bringing it in ever since.
Bringing in what?
Heroin. Two major shipments a year.
It's all run by ex-CIA. Soldiers, mercs...
You son of a bitch!
If you were gettin' cold feet, why did they kill Amanda?
Why not just kill you?
- They can't kill me. They need me. - Why?
My company, the bank, is a perfect front.
Makes everything look great on the tax reports.
The tax reports...
This is big business, Roger.
Not anymore. I'm gonna burn it down.
You can't. It's too big, Rog.
These people are trained, expert killers.
I wanna know about your next shipment,
where it's coming in, how many people you got working...
I can't tell you that, Roger. I can't.
I got another daughter. You can't protect her. I'm in this too deep, Roger.
Heroin. You got off easy, you son of a bitch!
- You through? - I haven't even started.
Gen. McAllister, channel 1. This is Delta One. We're coming in. Over.
- So, you've accomplished your mission? - Yes, sir.
Mr. Hunsaker is dead, sir.
I'm afraid, however, that another problem exists.
What is it? Explain.
Hunsaker spoke to the police, sir.
- Are they dead? - No, sir, I missed the opportunity.
Very disappointing.
So, the police may know everything, the whole operation, then.
That is correct, sir.
Joshua, I think it's time we turned up the heat.
Come on home.
- Hi. - Hi.
What's a nice Irish girl like you doing out here tonight?
Hey, listen I'm looking for a guy, had this girl in his stable.
You know this girl?
No, I've never seen her before.
Dixie, she's in your line of work. You sure?
- Sure. Why? What are you doin'? - I'm a police officer.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna drag your ass to jail...
You wore your vest!
That was smart, kid. Come on.
Ho-hold on! I'm on your side, I'm on your side.
Oh, son of a bitch, that hurts!
I'm pissed, Roger! Now I'm pissed.
Look at your face!
With two inches higher, he'd have hit your head.
Yeah, two inches lower, I'd be a falsetto for life.
Come on, we gotta go.
I bet you'd sound nice too. Come on.
- Where's my gun? Where's my gun? - Here, here.
Thanks.
- Oh, shit! Roger! - What?
The guy who shot me... The guy who shot me...
The same albino jackrabbit son of a bitch that did Hunsaker.
- You sure? - I'm sure, man.
I never forget an asshole.
And I got an idea.
Get a couple of first-class tickets to Detroit,
lay low for a couple weeks. What do you say?
Uh, come on, be serious. What-what do we do?
What else?
We bury the fuckers. And you know something else?
What?
We do this right, we get famous. Do shaving ads and shit. Girls, money....
Yeah, sure, with our luck, we'll be doin' Forest Lawn commercials.
- Bullshit! We got the edge, Cochise. - Edge?
Roger, they think I'm dead. I'm a corpse.
Brilliant.
Brilliant shit!
- 3-William-56, over. - We got a body for you. Male, Caucasian...
He's at Hunsaker's place. I saw him, he saw me.
Ah, negative. Get someone else to do it, okay?
Captain says give it to you. 3rd and Ocean. About two blocks from your house.
Uh, yeah, sure. He's probably blond with, uh, big dimples.
How did you know that, sarge? Over.
Hey, get in here!
- What's the matter? What? - Trouble.
What? What?!
Got a feeling they just gave a description
of the kid my daughter's dating.
Let's be dark and quiet.
One... two...
The bastards got my daughter.
What is it?
No-nothin'.
- What is it?! - Nothin'!
Get back in your room. Back in your room!
- M-Murtaugh. - You have a very beautiful daughter.
If I were you, I'd stick by the phone to find out where to meet us.
They got my kid.
Bastards took my baby.
Sgt. McCaskey, pick up line three.
Robbery-Homicide, McCaskey speaking.
Yes, this is KCOP news.
We understand that there was an officer-involved shooting
earlier this evening. Could you give us some more information?
Sgt. Martin Riggs was shot and killed. Who is this?
Oh, thank you. We'll send somebody right over.
Bingo! Riggs is out of the picture.
I want Murtaugh taken alive.
He may not talk.
We have his little girl. He'll talk.
You know they're gonna kill her, don't you?
Yes.
And if you want her back, you're gonna have
to take her away from them.
I know.
We do this my way. You shoot and you shoot to kill.
Get as many as you can. All you gotta do is just not miss.
I won't miss.
We're gonna get bloody on this one, Roger.
Are you really crazy?
Or are you as good as you say you are?
You're gonna have to trust me.
Here we go.
Murtaugh.
We don't want your daughter.
We just wanna know what Hunsaker told you.
Dry lake. Victorville. Sunrise tomorrow. Be there.
Murtaugh!
Yes, that's right. Show me my daughter!
Let me see her, then I'll come quietly.
He wants to see the girl.
Get out.
Daddy?!
O-o-okay, baby! I'm here.
Okay, it's all right.
Simple exchange.
You come with us, the girl takes a walk.
Let her go now.
As I say, take your hands out of your pockets.
Sure thing, pal.
It's alive.
Let her go now, or we all die.
Take him!
He has a grenade!
He's bluffing! He wouldn't risk killing his own daughter.
If she's gonna die...
she's gonna die with me. My way, not yours.
Come on, goddamn it, Roger, get out of the way.
Move to your left. Come on!
Put the pin back in.
Officer Murtaugh, don't be foolish. Look at the hardware.
Your left, move to your left.
Look at the firepower. You're grounded. Riggs is gone.
Put the pin back in the grenade.
If you come closer...
then we all die.
No. I don't think so.
Daddy!
Come on, honey. Come on, honey.
Just a smoker.
Bingo.
- Where is he? - Damn, it's Riggs.
Rianne, get in the car!
Get in the fucking car!
Go, Rianne, go!
Come on, cottontail, stick your head up.
That's it, you son of a bitch. Good night.
Don't try it, son. You're not that fast.
Hello, Joshua. Hello, Joshua.
- Yes, sir. - I got Riggs.
Yes, sir.
He's got Riggs. Go get the girl! The girl!
Throw your weapon down!
Put your hands behind your head!
You're gen. Peter McAllister, commander of Shadow Company.
Well, I see we... we've heard of each other.
Yep. It'll almost be a shame when I nail you.
I ran into some of those Shadow Company pussies
in Saigon in about '69.
You did, did you?
Leave me alone!
Why don't you save your strength? You're gonna need it.
Who's the Chin?
Endo, meet Mr. Martin Riggs.
Endo here has forgotten more about dispensing pain
- than you and I will ever know. - Bring him in.
See, Martin, we have a problem.
Since we have Murtaugh...
we don't really need you.
- But I believe in being thorough. - Yeah, I've heard that about you.
Yeah.
Well, our problem... and yours too...
is we have a shipment of merchandise to deliver.
Why don't you guys just call it heroin?
It's rather large, this shipment.
It would be unfortunate, however,
if we showed up to deliver our heroin...
and were surrounded by 50 cops.
That would be too bad.
Yes, it would be.
So it's essential for us to find out all the cops know.
Hey, we don't know shit.
You-you did Hunsaker before he could say...
No! No!
I wish I could believe you. But, unfortunately, I don't.
Now, if you would kindly tell me everything you know...
I promise you I'll kill you quick.
I told you everything I know.
What is that thing?
I'll tell you what it is.
It's called electric shock treatment.
Well... I guess we're in for a long night, cause I don't know shit.
We'll see. Endo!
Son of a bitch!
Hit him again!
Hit 'im again!
Come on, tell me about the shipment!
I'm gonna fucking kill the both of you!
That's very funny. I want to know about the shipment!
- The shipment, Mr. Murtaugh. - Go spit.
Salt.
Go spit, you son of a bitch. Fuck you!
This is getting nowhere.
Mr. Large.
He knows shit. We're safe.
He'd have told us. Nobody can take that.
Fine.
Badass soldier, huh?
Get her up, go on.
Get her up.
Untie me and I'll kill all of you bastards!
You better tell me what you know.
Fuck you, bastard! Son of a bitch, I'll kill you!
I swear I'll kill you, fucking bastard.
Sorry, pal. Say good night.
Yes, that's a real good-looking young woman
you got there, Mr. Murtaugh.
I've told you everything.
We'll soon know, won't we?
I'm warning you.
Don't.
Spare me, son. It's over.
There's no more heroes left in the world.
Kill that son of a bitch!
That asshole's getting away!
Who's fucking next?
McAllister!
Who's next?
Pretty thin, huh?
Anorexic.
It's all right.
Let's do what one shepherd said to the other shepherd.
What?
Let's get the flock out of here.
Come on, let's go. It's all right. It's all right, baby.
Is it him?
No. It's not Joshua.
Hey, what do you...?
Joshua!!
Come on, come, come on! Let's go!
Come on, come on, come on!
Move it, move , move it, move it!
Halt! Stop! Stop! Stop!
Get out of the fucking car! Come on, now!
Police officers! Police officers!
Freeze!
I'm a police officer. Got a badge in my pocket.
Give me some backup and take care of the girl.
- Hey, Riggs! - Yo!
- The freeway. He's going for the freeway! - You okay?
Yeah.
Cut over the 3rd Street bridge! You'll be able to get ahead of 'im.
General McAllister...
time for you to die.
Hold it!
Get back in your car!
Mind if I test-drive your Audi?
Stop the son of a bitch!
Shit!
He got my car!
- Get back! - Hey, man, I'm cool.
Let's get out of here!
Open the door!
Kill that cop son of a bitch!
No way you live. No way.
- Gangway! - Hold it now.
- Police officer. - Okay, go ahead.
Well, shit! What now, kid?
Oh, first thing we gotta do is get you to the hospital, huh?
- Yeah, yeah. - Come on. Let's go.
Don't breathe this stuff. You'll see pink elephants.
- And Joshua? - The slippery son of a bitch got away!
- What do you mean he got away? - Hey, fire me.
- Shit. - Hey! Where you going, Roger?
Hey, sarge, I'm commandeering your car here.
Hey! Hey, hey! What's the matter?
My home, man! The son of a bitch knows where I live.
Well, I'll drive, Cochise. I'll drive.
- Hey, I gotta look at him! - Don't worry about it, he's all right.
- There you go. - I'm all right.
3-W-30 en route to sgt. Murtaugh's residence.
Requesting additional units.
Excuse me, sir. May we help you?
No, thank you.
Good morning, sir.
Tell me, what day is it?
Goddamn Christmas!
I'll give you a home to come back to.
Crazy son of a bitch!
Give me that. Drop it.
Looking for your general friend?
Yeah. He's barbecuing his nuts on Hollywood Boulevard.
What do you say, Jack?
You like a shot at the title?
Don't mind if I do.
O-o-okay, men! Okay, okay. I'm Sgt. Murtaugh. My responsibility here!
Watch commander is en route.
Until then, Sgt. Murtaugh is in charge on site.
Just keep the citizens clear.
Keep everyone back!
It's Sgt. Riggs' arrest. I take full responsibility!
The son of a bitch just killed two of our men!
Get him, kid! He's yours!
Come on, Riggs! Break his back! Come on!
You wanna quit now? You wanna quit now?
Give me your nightstick!
Riggs!
Come on!
Show me what you got! Come on, come on, come on!
Eat this, sucker!
Just let them take him!
Come on, let me take him!
- No!! - Riggs!
No! Back off!
Break his fucking neck!
It's not worth it.
You lose.
Get that shit off my lawn!
How you doing, kid?
I got you. I-I got you, partner.
Merry Christmas, Victoria Lynn.
I love you.
- Hi. - Oh, hi.
- How are you? - I'm-I'm... I'm gonna be all right.
- Oh, good. - You?
Yeah, I'm good, yeah.
Uhh... Give this to your dad, okay? Uh...
It's a present for 'im. Tell him I won't be needing it anymore.
- It's a bullet. - Yeah, it's a bullet.
Oh, he'll understand.
Hey, you wanna come in? We're-we're building.
No, I... I gotta go.
You have a nice Christmas, though, okay?
Okay. You too.
Okay. Bye.
Bye.
Riggs! Yo.
After all we've been through,
if you think I'm-a eat the world's lousiest Christmas turkey by myself,
you're crazy.
- I'll tell you a little secret. - What?
I'm not crazy.
I know.
Oh, good. Let's eat.
Hey, you know something?
Well, I... I think your daughter kinda likes me.
- If you touch her, I'll kill you. - You'll try.
- Hey, you mind if I bring a friend? - Course, you bring a friend.
Hey!
I don't think Burbank the cat's gonna like this.
I'll put five on the mutt.
I'm too old for this.