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00:00:04,104 --> 00:00:05,867
THERE NOW FOLLOWS
A PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST
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00:00:05,905 --> 00:00:07,133
ON BEHALF OF THE LIBERAL PARTY.
3
00:00:07,173 --> 00:00:09,107
Pratt, back to Pratt.
4
00:00:09,142 --> 00:00:11,076
Pratt again, a long ball
out to Pratt
5
00:00:11,111 --> 00:00:12,772
and now Pratt is on the ball...
6
00:00:12,812 --> 00:00:16,009
a neat little flick back inside
to Pratt, who takes it nicely
7
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:18,483
and sends it through
on the far side to Pratt.
8
00:00:18,518 --> 00:00:21,817
Pratt with it but passes
instead to Pratt, Pratt again...
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00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:23,254
Oh, and well intercepted
10
00:00:23,289 --> 00:00:26,190
by the swarthy little
number nine Concito Maracon.
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00:00:26,226 --> 00:00:27,523
This 21-year-old halfback
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remarkably stocky
for six foot, three inches
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square shouldered, balding
giant, hair flowing in the wind
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bright-eyed, pert,
young for his age
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but oh-so-old in so many ways.
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For a 39-year-old you wouldn't
expect such speed.
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Normally considered slow...
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Sweeping up and taking
the defense to the cleaners.
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Who would have thought,
though many expected it
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this remarkable 45-year-old
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nine foot, four inches
dwarf of a man
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who is still only 17
in some parts of the world
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would ever really be...
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oh, and there was
a goal there apparently...
25
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and now it's Pratt,
back to Pratt...
26
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Pratt again...
a long ball out to Pratt...
27
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I REALLY LIKE
THIS ANO-WHEAT.
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IT REALLY
UNCLOGS ME.
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OH, DO BE CAREFUL!
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SORRY, MUM.
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I MEAN, A LOT
OF THE OTHERS
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SAY THEY
UNCLOG YOU
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BUT I NEVER HAD
A SINGLE BOWEL MOVEMENT
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WITH THEM
"RECTO-PUFFS."
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NOW, IF WE...
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OH, SORRY, MUM.
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IF WE LIVED
IN RHODESIA
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THERE'D BE
SOMEONE
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TO MOP THAT UP
FOR YOU.
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DON'T BE SO
BLEEDIN' STUPID.
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IF YOU LIVED
IN BLEEDIN' RHODESIA
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YOU'D BE OUT AT BLEEDIN' FASCIST
RALLIES EVERY BLEEDIN' DAY.
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YOU'RE A BLEEDIN' RACIST,
YOU BLEEDIN' ARE!
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LANGUAGE!
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WELL, HE GETS
ON MY SODDING WICK.
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THAT'S BETTER.
47
00:01:41,167 --> 00:01:42,532
NO, THE STUFF
I LIKED WAS
48
00:01:42,569 --> 00:01:44,503
THAT STUFF
THEY GAVE YOU
BEFORE THE WAR
49
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WHAT WAS IT?...
50
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WILKINSON'S
NUMBER EIGHT
LAXATIVE CEREAL.
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WHEW, THAT ONE
WENT THROUGH YOU
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LIKE A BLOODY FERRARI.
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00:01:51,511 --> 00:01:53,570
NOW, WHO'S THAT
AT THIS TIME OF DAY?
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IF IT'S THE MAN
TO EMPTY THE ELSAN
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TELL HIM IT'S
IN THE HALL.
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RIGHT, DEAR.
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AND MAKE SURE
THAT YOU HOLD IT
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THE RIGHT
WAY UP.
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DAD?
60
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YEAH?
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00:02:02,555 --> 00:02:03,544
NO, NO,
MY DAD.
62
00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:04,852
OH.
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DAD, WHY IS RHODESIA
CALLED RHODESIA?
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OH, SORRY, DAD.
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NO, NO, THANK YOU
VERY MUCH.
66
00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:13,322
NO, I'M SORRY.
67
00:02:13,366 --> 00:02:15,095
THANK YOU VERY
MUCH, INDEED.
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00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:16,693
NO, THANK YOU
FOR CALLING.
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NOT TODAY, THANK YOU.
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GOOD MORNING.
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WHO WAS THAT?
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THE LIBERAL PARTY
CANDIDATE, DARLING.
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WHAT HAVE YOU
DONE NOW?
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SORRY, MUM.
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I WAS JUST
WASHING UP.
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GO AND
SIT DOWN!
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MUM...
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MUM, DO YOU KNOW
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WHY RHODESIA'S
CALLED RHODESIA?
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DO YOU REMEMBER
"GO-EAZI"?
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THEY WERE
HOPELESS...
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LITTLE BLACK
PELLETS
83
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TASTED FOUL
84
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AND THEY STUCK
INSIDE YOU
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LIKE FLOORING
ADHESIVE.
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WELL, I'M OFF!
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WHAT TIME ARE YOU
COMING BACK TONIGHT?
88
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3:00 A. M!
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00:02:51,738 --> 00:02:52,932
I THINK IT'S DISGUSTING
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00:02:52,972 --> 00:02:54,405
YOU A MEMBER OF PARLIAMENT.
91
00:02:55,808 --> 00:02:57,833
LAST NIGHT I HEARD YOU
SNOGGING AWAY.
92
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WE WAS NOT SNOGGING!
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SURE... SOUNDED LIKE
SNOGGING TO ME.
94
00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:05,414
I COULD HEAR HIS GREAT WET,
SLOBBERING LIPS GOING AT YOU
95
00:03:05,451 --> 00:03:07,112
AND HIS HAND
GOING...
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00:03:07,153 --> 00:03:08,120
DAD!
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YEAH?
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00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:10,122
NO, NOT YOU.
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00:03:10,156 --> 00:03:11,123
OH.
100
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JUST MIND
YOUR LANGUAGE.
101
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OH, SORRY, MUM.
102
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I'VE RUN OUT OF BEANS!
103
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WE WAS
TALKING!
104
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:21,993
WE WAS
NOT SNOGGING!
105
00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:24,367
TALKING ABOUT
SNOGGING, I'LL BET.
106
00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:25,837
IF YOU
MUST KNOW
107
00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:28,067
WE WAS TALKING ABOUT
COUNCIL RE-HOUSING!
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WOULD IT MEAN
GOING TO LIVE IN HOLLYWOOD?
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I'VE RUN OUT OF BEANS!
110
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WHERE TO RE-HOUSE
HIS RIGHT HAND...
111
00:03:34,681 --> 00:03:36,581
THAT'S ALL HE WAS INTERESTED IN!
112
00:03:36,616 --> 00:03:39,176
AND HAS FAYE DUNAWAY
DEFINITELY SAID YES?
113
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HE IS THE CHAIRMAN
OF THE HOUSING SUBCOMMITTEE.
114
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SNOGGING SUBCOMMITTEE,
MORE LIKE.
115
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RALPH, DO ANSWER
THAT DOOR, WILL YOU?
116
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BEANS!
117
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SHUT UP!!
118
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YES, MUM.
119
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IF IT'S THE MAN
FROM PROBBO-RIB
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TELL HIM
IT'S IN THE BED.
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ALL RIGHT.
122
00:03:59,105 --> 00:04:00,072
SORRY, MUM.
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POSTMAAAAN!
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WELL, A VERY GOOD TRY THERE
BY THE GARIBALDI FAMILY
125
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OF DROITWICH IN WORCESTERSHIRE.
126
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PROFESSOR?
127
00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:18,947
WELL, I CAN'T
MAKE UP MY MIND
128
00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:19,924
ABOUT THIS FAMILY.
129
00:04:19,959 --> 00:04:21,187
I DON'T THINK THERE WAS
130
00:04:21,227 --> 00:04:23,559
THE SUSTAINED AWFULNESS
THAT WE REALLY NEED.
131
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:25,530
I MEAN, THE FATHER
WAS APPALLING...
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APPALLING, YES.
133
00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:29,561
HE WAS DIRTY, SMELLY
AND DISTASTEFUL
134
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,627
AND I LIKED HIM
VERY MUCH, BUT...
135
00:04:33,406 --> 00:04:34,373
LADY ORGANS?
136
00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:35,669
WELL, THEY WERE
137
00:04:35,708 --> 00:04:37,175
AN UNPLEASANT
FAMILY, CERTAINLY
138
00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:38,302
BUT I DON'T
THINK WE HAD
139
00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:39,868
ANY OF THE REALLY
GROSS AWFULNESS
140
00:04:39,912 --> 00:04:41,038
WE'RE LOOKING FOR.
141
00:04:41,080 --> 00:04:42,513
WELL, HARSH WORDS THERE
142
00:04:42,548 --> 00:04:45,745
FOR THE GARIBALDI FAMILY
OF DROITWICH IN WORCESTERSHIRE
143
00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:49,516
AT PRESENT HOLDERS OF THE EAST
MIDLANDS MOST-AWFUL-FAMILY AWARD
144
00:04:49,555 --> 00:04:51,147
LOWER MIDDLE-CLASS SECTION
145
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:55,718
BUT UNABLE TODAY TO SCORE MORE
THAN 15 ON OUR DISGUSTOMETER.
146
00:04:55,762 --> 00:04:58,424
WELL, WITH THE SCORES
ALL IN FROM THE JUDGES
147
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THE GARIBALDIS ARE NUMBER THREE
AND A SURPRISE AT NUMBER TWO:
148
00:05:02,101 --> 00:05:04,296
THE FANSHAW-CHUMLEIGHS
OF BERKSHIRE.
149
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:22,000
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll
150
00:05:24,724 --> 00:05:27,124
WELL, SOME OF
THE WONDERFUL BEHAVIOR
151
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,390
THAT MADE THE FANSHAW-CHUMLEIGHS
152
00:05:29,429 --> 00:05:32,557
THE SECOND-MOST-AWFUL FAMILY
IN BRITAIN, 1974.
153
00:05:32,598 --> 00:05:35,931
BUT THE WINNERS,
BY A CLEAR TEN-POINT MARGIN
154
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ONCE AGAIN, THE AWFUL
JODRELL FAMILY OF DURHAM.
155
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UNFORTUNATELY,
WE'RE NOT ALLOWED TO SHOW YOU
156
00:05:41,941 --> 00:05:44,432
SOME OF THE PERFORMANCE
THAT WON THEM THE AWARD
157
00:05:44,477 --> 00:05:47,310
BUT I ASSURE YOU IT WAS
OF THE VERY HIGHEST STANDARD
158
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:48,075
WAS IT NOT, LADY ORGANS?
159
00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:49,672
OH, YES, SUPERB.
160
00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:51,013
I MEAN, MR. JODRELL...
161
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YOU KNOW, THE OLD GRANDFATHER
WHO LICKS THE...
162
00:05:53,119 --> 00:05:54,416
YES, YES...
163
00:05:54,454 --> 00:05:56,012
HE'S SUPERB.
164
00:05:56,055 --> 00:05:58,523
HIS GOBBING IS CONSISTENT
AND ACCURATE.
165
00:05:58,558 --> 00:06:01,049
HIS SON IS A DIRTY,
FOUL LITTLE CREATURE
166
00:06:01,094 --> 00:06:03,654
AND THOSE FRIGHTFUL SCABS
WHICH MRS. JODRELL...
167
00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:05,186
WELL, THANK YOU
VERY MUCH, LADY ORGANS
168
00:06:05,231 --> 00:06:07,222
AND FROM ALL OF US,
WELL DONE TO THE JODRELLS
169
00:06:07,266 --> 00:06:09,097
AND TO ALL OF YOU,
NOT FORGETTING THOSE OF YOU
170
00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:10,363
WHO MAY BE HALFWAY IN BETWEEN
171
00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:12,030
WITHOUT WHOM, OF COURSE
AND NOT FORGETTING
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00:06:12,071 --> 00:06:14,005
WHO MADE IT ALL POSSIBLE WHEN,
AND WE'LL BE BACK
173
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,701
UNTIL THEN, AND SO
IT'S GOOD NIGHT FROM ME
174
00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:17,403
AND HERE'S WISHING YOU
A SAFE JOURNEY HOME.
175
00:06:17,443 --> 00:06:18,842
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING
THIS SHOW.
176
00:06:18,878 --> 00:06:20,311
DON'T FORGET IT WAS
ALL GREAT FUN, I EN JOYED IT
177
00:06:20,346 --> 00:06:22,507
AND I HOPE YOU
WATCHING AT HOME
178
00:06:22,548 --> 00:06:24,038
HAVE EN JOYED IT TOO.
179
00:06:25,184 --> 00:06:27,880
THE JODRELLS WIN
EVERY BLOODY YEAR.
180
00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:29,251
MAKES YOU VOMIT!
181
00:06:29,288 --> 00:06:30,312
DAD?
182
00:06:30,356 --> 00:06:31,414
YES?
183
00:06:31,457 --> 00:06:33,982
GET YOUR STINKING FEET
OFF THE BREAD.
184
00:06:34,026 --> 00:06:36,722
I'M ONLY WIPING
THE CAT'S DO'S OFF!
185
00:06:36,763 --> 00:06:37,457
MUM?
186
00:06:37,497 --> 00:06:39,590
SHUT YOUR GOB,
DOUGLAS.
187
00:06:39,632 --> 00:06:41,463
I WANT MORE
CORN PLASTERS!
188
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:42,900
SHUT UP AND EAT
WHAT YOU GOT!
189
00:06:46,439 --> 00:06:49,033
SOME FAT BASTARD AT THE DOOR!
190
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:51,839
SHUT UP!
191
00:06:51,878 --> 00:06:55,780
A STRONG HIVE OF BEES CONTAINS
APPROXIMATELY 75,000 BEES.
192
00:06:55,815 --> 00:06:58,841
EACH HONEYBEE MUST MAKE
154 TRIPS TO COLLECT
193
00:06:58,885 --> 00:07:00,546
ONE TEASPOONFUL
OF HONEY.
194
00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:01,678
HELLO, SIR.
195
00:07:01,721 --> 00:07:03,279
WHAT DO
YOU WANT?
196
00:07:03,322 --> 00:07:04,721
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY
SOME OF OUR HONEY, SIR?
197
00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:06,019
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING IN HERE?
198
00:07:06,058 --> 00:07:07,116
WHICH WOULD
YOU LIKE...
199
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:08,684
THE CALIFORNIAN
ORANGE BLOSSOM
200
00:07:08,728 --> 00:07:10,127
THE MEXICAN,
THE NEW ZEALAND
201
00:07:10,163 --> 00:07:11,357
OR THE SCOTTISH
HEATHER?
202
00:07:11,397 --> 00:07:12,762
HE CAN'T EAT HONEY.
203
00:07:12,799 --> 00:07:14,460
IT MAKES HIM
GO PLOP-PLOPS!
204
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:16,695
COME ON, PLEASE
TRY SOME.
205
00:07:16,736 --> 00:07:17,896
ALL RIGHT,
I'LL HAVE
206
00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:19,165
SOME ICELANDIC
HONEY.
207
00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:20,399
NO, THERE IS NO SUCH THING.
208
00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:22,601
YOU MEAN YOU DON'T MAKE
ANY HONEY AT ALL?
209
00:07:22,642 --> 00:07:25,839
NO, NO, WE MUST IMPORT IT ALL,
EVERY BALLY DROP.
210
00:07:25,878 --> 00:07:27,470
WE ARE A GLOOMY PEOPLE.
211
00:07:27,513 --> 00:07:29,981
IT'S SO CRIKEY COLD
AND DARK UP THERE
212
00:07:30,016 --> 00:07:31,984
AND THERE'S ONLY FISH TO EAT.
213
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:33,679
FISH AND IMPORTED HONEY.
214
00:07:33,719 --> 00:07:35,016
OH, STREWTH!
215
00:07:35,054 --> 00:07:37,318
WELL, WHY DO YOU
HAVE A WEEK?
216
00:07:37,356 --> 00:07:38,186
LISTEN, BUSTER!
217
00:07:38,224 --> 00:07:39,521
IN REYKJAVIK
IT IS DARK
218
00:07:39,559 --> 00:07:41,117
FOR EIGHT MONTHS
OF THE YEAR
219
00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:42,252
AND IT'S
COLD ENOUGH
220
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,694
TO FREEZE
YOUR WRISTS OFF
221
00:07:43,729 --> 00:07:45,697
AND THERE'S ONLY
GOLLY FISH TO EAT.
222
00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:48,029
ADMINISTRATIVE ERRORS
ARE BOUND TO OCCUR
223
00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:49,329
IN ENORMOUS
QUANTITIES.
224
00:07:49,368 --> 00:07:50,096
LOOK AT THIS.
225
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:51,262
IT'S ALL A MISTAKE.
226
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,829
IT'S A REAL PAIN
IN THE SPHINCTER!
227
00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:56,205
ICELANDIC HONEY WEEK? MY LIFE!
228
00:07:56,242 --> 00:07:57,834
WELL, WHY DO YOU
COME IN HERE
229
00:07:57,877 --> 00:07:59,606
TRYING TO FLOG
THE STUFF, THEN?
230
00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:02,045
LISTEN, COWBOY,
I GOT A JOB TO DO.
231
00:08:02,081 --> 00:08:04,049
IT'S A STUPID,
POINTLESS JOB
232
00:08:04,083 --> 00:08:05,744
BUT AT LEAST
IT KEEPS ME
233
00:08:05,785 --> 00:08:07,844
AWAY FROM ICELAND,
ALL RIGHT?
234
00:08:07,887 --> 00:08:10,412
THE LEG OF THE WORKER BEE HAS...
235
00:08:37,917 --> 00:08:41,580
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
236
00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:43,612
and A&E TELEVISION NETWORKS]
237
00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:09,547
WELL, MR. COTTON,
YOU HAVE
238
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:11,482
WHAT WE IN THE MEDICAL
PROFESSION CALL
239
00:09:11,517 --> 00:09:12,415
A NAUGHTY COMPLAINT.
240
00:09:12,451 --> 00:09:13,975
NOW, MY ADVICE
TO YOU IS
241
00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:16,386
TO PUT THIS PAPER BAG
OVER YOUR HEAD...
242
00:09:16,422 --> 00:09:18,822
IT'S GOT LITTLE
HOLES THERE, YOU SEE
243
00:09:18,858 --> 00:09:20,826
LITTLE HOLES
FOR YOUR EYES...
244
00:09:20,860 --> 00:09:23,522
AND TO RING THIS BELL
AND TO TAKE THIS CARD
245
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:25,326
ALONG TO YOUR
HOSPITAL, OKAY?
246
00:09:25,364 --> 00:09:28,390
AND I SHALL INFORM
ALL YOUR RELATIVES
AND FRIENDS
247
00:09:28,434 --> 00:09:31,494
AND ANYONE ELSE
THAT I HAPPEN TO
BUMP INTO, OKAY?
248
00:09:31,537 --> 00:09:33,630
CASH, WASN'T IT?
249
00:09:33,673 --> 00:09:35,197
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
250
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:38,373
GET OUT.
251
00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:44,241
DIRTY LITTLE MAN.
252
00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:46,444
HIPPOCRATIC OATH, HIPPOCRATIC...
253
00:09:46,485 --> 00:09:47,645
OH, IT'S NOT IN THERE.
254
00:09:47,687 --> 00:09:48,779
JOLLY GOOD.
255
00:09:48,821 --> 00:09:51,187
VERY USEFUL. NEXT!
256
00:09:54,627 --> 00:09:57,118
AH, YES, YOU MUST BE
MR. WILLIAMS.
257
00:09:57,163 --> 00:09:58,790
WELL, DO TAKE A SEAT.
258
00:09:58,831 --> 00:10:00,924
WHAT SEEMS TO BE
THE TROUBLE?
259
00:10:00,967 --> 00:10:03,731
I'VE JUST BEEN STABBED
BY YOUR NURSE!
260
00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:04,929
OH, DEAR, YES, WELL...
261
00:10:04,971 --> 00:10:07,166
I'D PROBABLY BETTER HAVE
A LOOK AT YOU THEN.
262
00:10:07,206 --> 00:10:08,935
COULD YOU FILL IN
THIS FORM FIRST?
263
00:10:08,975 --> 00:10:11,239
SHE JUST STABBED ME.
264
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:12,869
YES, SHE'S
AN UNPREDICTABLE SORT.
265
00:10:12,912 --> 00:10:15,005
LOOK, YOU SEEM TO BE
BLEEDING RATHER BADLY.
266
00:10:15,047 --> 00:10:17,641
I THINK YOU'D BETTER HURRY UP
AND FILL IN THAT FORM.
267
00:10:17,683 --> 00:10:19,514
COULDN'T I FILL IT
IN LATER, DOCTOR?
268
00:10:19,552 --> 00:10:22,385
NO, NO, YOU'LL HAVE
BLED TO DEATH BY THEN.
269
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:23,718
CAN YOU HOLD A PEN?
270
00:10:23,756 --> 00:10:24,916
I'LL TRY.
271
00:10:24,957 --> 00:10:26,618
YES, JOLLY GOOD.
272
00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:28,251
IT'S A HELL
OF A NUISANCE
273
00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:29,955
ALL THIS DAMN PAPERWORK.
274
00:10:29,996 --> 00:10:31,088
REALLY, IT IS.
275
00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:33,792
IT'S A REAL NIGHTMARE,
THIS PAPERWORK.
276
00:10:33,833 --> 00:10:36,199
IT REALLY IS A HELL
OF A NUISANCE.
277
00:10:36,235 --> 00:10:37,998
SOMETHING OUGHT
TO BE DONE ABOUT IT.
278
00:10:38,037 --> 00:10:39,004
DO I HAVE TO ANSWER
279
00:10:39,038 --> 00:10:40,335
ALL THE QUESTIONS,
DOCTOR?
280
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:41,965
NO, NO, NO, JUST...
281
00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:44,670
JUST FILL IN AS
MANY AS YOU CAN.
282
00:10:44,710 --> 00:10:47,679
NO NEED TO GO
INTO TOO MUCH
DETAIL, YOU KNOW.
283
00:10:47,713 --> 00:10:50,978
I DON'T KNOW
WHY WE BOTHER
WITH IT ALL, REALLY
284
00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:52,575
IT'S SUCH A NUISANCE.
285
00:10:52,618 --> 00:10:54,813
WELL, LET'S SEE
HOW YOU'VE DONE, THEN.
286
00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:56,549
OH, YES.
287
00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:57,749
OH, DEAR, OH, DEAR
288
00:10:57,790 --> 00:10:59,621
THAT'S NOT
VERY GOOD, IS IT?
289
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,820
LOOK, SURELY
YOU KNEW NUMBER FOUR!
290
00:11:01,861 --> 00:11:03,055
NO...
291
00:11:03,095 --> 00:11:04,289
IT'S FROM
THE MERCHANT OF VENICE.
292
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:05,297
EVEN I KNEW THAT!
293
00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:07,231
IT'S GOING
ON THE CARPET, DOCTOR.
294
00:11:07,266 --> 00:11:08,893
OH, DON'T WORRY
ABOUT THAT!
295
00:11:08,934 --> 00:11:10,561
LOOK AT THIS...
NUMBER SIX...
296
00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:12,468
IT'S THE TREATY
OF VERSAILLES!
297
00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:13,836
DIDN'T YOU KNOW THAT?
298
00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:15,067
OH, MY GOD.
299
00:11:15,107 --> 00:11:18,702
AND NUMBER NINE...
EMERSON FITTIPALDI!
300
00:11:18,744 --> 00:11:21,770
VIRGINIA WADE?
YOU MUST BE MAD!
301
00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:22,781
OH, DOCTOR...
302
00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:24,180
I'VE JUST SHOT
ANOTHER PATIENT.
303
00:11:24,216 --> 00:11:26,150
I DON'T THINK
THERE'S ANY POINT
IN YOUR SEEING HIM.
304
00:11:26,185 --> 00:11:27,277
YOU DIDN'T KILL HIM, DID YOU?
305
00:11:27,319 --> 00:11:28,581
AFRAID SO.
306
00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:30,213
YOU MUSTN'T KILL THEM, NURSE.
307
00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:31,382
OH, I'M SORRY, DOCTOR.
308
00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:33,324
IT WAS JUST ON THE SPUR
OF THE MOMENT.
309
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:34,485
RATHER SILLY, REALLY.
310
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:37,826
I'M SORRY ABOUT
THE CARPET, DOCTOR.
311
00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:41,094
MR. WILLIAMS,
I'M AFRAID I CAN'T
GIVE YOU ANY MARKS
312
00:11:41,133 --> 00:11:43,761
SO I WON'T BE ABLE
TO RECOMMEND YOU
FOR HOSPITAL.
313
00:11:43,803 --> 00:11:46,670
I TELL YOU WHAT,
I'LL STOP THE BLEEDING
314
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:48,264
BUT STRICTLY SPEAKING
315
00:11:48,307 --> 00:11:50,036
I SHOULDN'T
EVEN DO THAT
316
00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:51,566
ON MARKS LIKE THESE.
317
00:11:51,610 --> 00:11:54,044
THERE ARE NO
MORE PATIENTS
NOW, DOCTOR.
318
00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,048
OH, WELL, LET'S GO
FOR LUNCH, THEN.
319
00:11:56,082 --> 00:11:57,310
WHAT ABOUT... ER...
320
00:11:57,349 --> 00:11:58,816
AH, YES, LOOK,
MR. WILLIAMS
321
00:11:58,851 --> 00:12:01,183
WE'RE JUST POPPING OUT
FOR A BITE OF LUNCH
322
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:03,518
WHILE WE'VE
GOT A SPARE
MOMENT, YOU KNOW.
323
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:05,490
LOOK, HAVE ANOTHER
BASH AT THE FORM
324
00:12:05,524 --> 00:12:07,185
AND IF AT LEAST
YOU CAN ANSWER
325
00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:09,126
THE QUESTIONS
ON HISTORY ALL RIGHT
326
00:12:09,161 --> 00:12:10,185
THEN WE
MAY BE ABLE
327
00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:11,628
TO GIVE YOU
SOME MORPHINE
328
00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:13,291
OR SOMETHING
LIKE THAT, OKAY?
329
00:12:13,332 --> 00:12:15,459
THANK YOU, DOCTOR, THANK YOU.
330
00:12:15,501 --> 00:12:17,799
DEAR SIR, I WISH TO PROTEST
331
00:12:17,837 --> 00:12:20,533
IN THE STRONGEST
POSSIBLE TERMS.
332
00:12:20,573 --> 00:12:21,801
YOURS SINCERELY
333
00:12:21,841 --> 00:12:24,833
- BRIGADIER N.F.
- MARWOOD-GIT.
334
00:12:24,877 --> 00:12:27,505
READ THAT BACK,
WILL YOU, BRIAN?
335
00:12:27,546 --> 00:12:29,946
"AND WHEN HE HAD
BUILT UP CEDRON
336
00:12:29,982 --> 00:12:31,279
"HE SENT HORSEMEN THERE
337
00:12:31,317 --> 00:12:33,251
"AND AN HOST OF FOOTMEN
TO THE END
338
00:12:33,285 --> 00:12:35,719
"THAT ISSUING OUT
THEY MIGHT MAKE OUTROADS
339
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:38,747
UPON THE WAYS OF JUDEA
AS THE KING COMMANDED THEM."
340
00:12:38,791 --> 00:12:39,985
GOOD!
341
00:12:40,025 --> 00:12:41,993
POP IT IN AN ENVELOPE
AND BUNG IT OFF!
342
00:12:42,027 --> 00:12:43,961
IT'S NO GOOD BOTTLING
THINGS UP, BRIAN.
343
00:12:43,996 --> 00:12:45,987
IF YOU FEEL THEM
YOU MUST JUST SAY THEM
344
00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:47,157
OR YOU'LL JUST GO MAD.
345
00:12:47,199 --> 00:12:48,166
OH, YES, INDEED.
346
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:49,827
AS THE BOOK OF MACCABEE SAID
347
00:12:49,869 --> 00:12:52,030
"YEA, AS THE FLEA
IS LIKE UNTO AN OXEN
348
00:12:52,071 --> 00:12:54,665
"SO IS THE PRIVET HEDGE
LIKEN UNTO A BOTANIST
349
00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:56,368
BLACK IN THY SIGHT, O LORD."
350
00:12:56,408 --> 00:12:58,069
QUITE.
351
00:12:58,110 --> 00:13:00,271
LOOK, WHY DON'T
YOU JUST NIP OUT
FOR LUNCH, BRIAN?
352
00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:01,574
YEA, AS RAYMOND
CHANDLER SAID
353
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:02,774
"IT WAS ONE
OF THOSE DAYS
354
00:13:02,815 --> 00:13:04,612
"WHEN
LOS ANGELES FELT
355
00:13:04,650 --> 00:13:05,810
LIKE A ROCK-HARD FIG."
356
00:13:05,851 --> 00:13:09,150
BRIAN, LET'S STOP THIS
PRETENDING, SHALL WE?
357
00:13:09,188 --> 00:13:10,655
YEA, AS
DIRK BOGARDE SAID
358
00:13:10,689 --> 00:13:12,054
IN HIS
AUTOBIOGRAPHY...
359
00:13:12,091 --> 00:13:13,388
BRIAN!
360
00:13:13,425 --> 00:13:15,859
LET'S STOP ALL
THIS FUTILE PRETENSE.
361
00:13:15,895 --> 00:13:17,385
I'VE...
362
00:13:17,429 --> 00:13:20,592
I'VE ALWAYS BEEN
MODERATELY FOND OF YOU.
363
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:23,158
WELL, TO BE QUITE
FRANK, BRIGADIER
364
00:13:23,202 --> 00:13:25,033
ONE CAN'T WALK
SO CLOSELY
365
00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:28,005
WITH A CHAP LIKE YOU
FOR... FOR SO LONG
366
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,634
WITHOUT FEELING
SOMETHING
367
00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,405
DEEP DOWN INSIDE
368
00:13:32,444 --> 00:13:34,605
EVEN IF IT ISN'T
ANYTHING...
369
00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:37,514
ANYTHING
VERY MUCH.
370
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:40,110
WELL, SPLENDID, BRIAN.
371
00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:44,546
WELL, I DON'T SUPPOSE
372
00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:46,888
THERE'S MUCH
WE CAN DO, REALLY.
373
00:13:46,926 --> 00:13:49,554
NOT ON
TELEVISION, NO.
374
00:13:51,130 --> 00:13:53,360
NO.
375
00:13:53,399 --> 00:13:54,593
THEY, UH...
376
00:13:54,633 --> 00:13:56,794
THEY ARE A LOT MORE
PERMISSIVE THESE DAYS
377
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:57,996
THAN THEY USED TO BE.
378
00:13:58,037 --> 00:14:02,201
AH, YES, BUT NOT WITH
THIS SORT OF THING.
379
00:14:02,241 --> 00:14:03,970
NO.
380
00:14:04,009 --> 00:14:06,170
I SUPPOSE THEY'VE...
381
00:14:06,212 --> 00:14:08,305
GOT TO DRAW
THE LINE SOMEWHERE.
382
00:14:10,216 --> 00:14:12,047
YES.
383
00:14:13,018 --> 00:14:14,417
YES.
384
00:14:17,556 --> 00:14:19,649
WELL, TAKE
A LETTER, BRIAN.
385
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:22,217
DEAR SIR,
I WISH TO PROTEST...
386
00:14:51,323 --> 00:14:52,290
OOH!
387
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:56,422
HMM?
388
00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:07,202
OH.
389
00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:10,937
HO-OH!
390
00:15:10,976 --> 00:15:13,308
OH, OH.
391
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:01,517
HMM?
392
00:16:04,063 --> 00:16:06,031
MMM... MMM?
393
00:16:20,012 --> 00:16:21,104
THERE NOW FOLLOWS...
394
00:16:26,285 --> 00:16:27,980
HELLO.
395
00:16:28,020 --> 00:16:31,751
I'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU TONIGHT
ABOUT A MINORITY GROUP OF PEOPLE
396
00:16:31,790 --> 00:16:34,088
WHO HAVE NO MENTAL
OR PHYSICAL HANDICAPS
397
00:16:34,126 --> 00:16:36,560
AND WHO, THROUGH NO FAULT
OF THEIR OWN
398
00:16:36,595 --> 00:16:38,187
HAVE NEVER BEEN DEPRIVED
399
00:16:38,230 --> 00:16:42,360
AND CONSEQUENTLY ARE FORCED
TO LIVE IN CONDITIONS
400
00:16:42,401 --> 00:16:43,959
OF EXTREME LUXURY.
401
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,903
THIS OFTEN-IGNORED MINORITY
402
00:16:45,938 --> 00:16:50,307
IS VERY RARELY BROUGHT TO THE
ATTENTION OF THE GENERAL PUBLIC.
403
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:54,676
THE AVERAGE MAN IN THE STREET
SCARCELY GIVES A SECOND THOUGHT
404
00:16:54,713 --> 00:16:57,147
TO THESE EXTREMELY
WELL-OFF PEOPLE.
405
00:16:57,182 --> 00:17:00,743
HE QUITE SIMPLY FAILS
TO APPRECIATE THE PRESSURES
406
00:17:00,786 --> 00:17:04,313
THAT VAST QUANTITIES OF MONEY
JUST DO NOT BRING.
407
00:17:04,356 --> 00:17:07,519
HAVE YOU AT HOME EVER HAD
TO COPE WITH THIS PROBLEM?
408
00:17:10,295 --> 00:17:11,990
OR THIS?
409
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,797
I KNOW IT'S ONLY HUMAN TO SAY
410
00:17:16,835 --> 00:17:18,894
"OH, THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN
TO ME"
411
00:17:18,937 --> 00:17:21,064
AND OF COURSE, IT WON'T.
412
00:17:21,106 --> 00:17:23,700
So I'm asking you,
please, please
413
00:17:23,742 --> 00:17:27,371
send no contributions,
however large, to me.
414
00:17:28,947 --> 00:17:31,142
There now follows
a party political
broadcast...
415
00:17:31,183 --> 00:17:32,582
ALL RIGHT, I'LL GO.
416
00:17:41,427 --> 00:17:42,485
HELLO, MADAM.
417
00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:44,189
OH, HELLO, YOU MUST
HAVE COME ABOUT...
418
00:17:44,229 --> 00:17:45,594
FINISHING THE
SENTENCES, YES.
419
00:17:45,631 --> 00:17:47,394
OH, WELL, PERHAPS
YOU'D LIKE TO...
420
00:17:47,433 --> 00:17:49,196
COME THROUGH THIS WAY,
CERTAINLY.
421
00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:50,826
OH, NICE PLACE
YOU'VE GOT HERE.
422
00:17:50,869 --> 00:17:52,097
YES, WELL, WE, UH...
423
00:17:52,137 --> 00:17:53,536
LIKE IT.
424
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:54,630
YES, WE CERTAINLY...
425
00:17:54,673 --> 00:17:55,640
DO, GOOD.
426
00:17:55,674 --> 00:17:57,164
NOW, WHEN DID YOU FIRST START...
427
00:17:57,209 --> 00:17:58,676
FINDING IT DIFFICULT...
428
00:17:58,710 --> 00:18:00,109
TO FINISH SENTENCES, YES.
429
00:18:00,145 --> 00:18:01,339
WELL, IT'S NOT ME, IT'S MY...
430
00:18:01,380 --> 00:18:01,869
HUSBAND?
431
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:02,744
YES, HE...
432
00:18:02,781 --> 00:18:03,577
NEVER LETS YOU FINISH
433
00:18:03,615 --> 00:18:04,411
WHAT YOU'VE STARTED?
434
00:18:04,450 --> 00:18:05,712
QUITE, I'M BEGINNING TO FEEL...
435
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,719
YOU'LL NEVER FINISH A SENTENCE
AGAIN AS LONG AS YOU LIVE?
436
00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:08,276
EXACT...
437
00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:09,810
- LY... IT MUST BE AWFUL.
438
00:18:09,855 --> 00:18:10,844
IT'S DRIVING ME...
439
00:18:10,889 --> 00:18:11,583
TO DRINK.
440
00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:12,089
NO, ROU...
441
00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:12,715
- ND THE BE...
442
00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:13,156
- EN...
443
00:18:13,192 --> 00:18:13,681
- D.
444
00:18:13,725 --> 00:18:14,953
YES.
445
00:18:14,993 --> 00:18:16,085
MAY I...
446
00:18:16,128 --> 00:18:17,117
TAKE A SEAT.
447
00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:18,254
THANK YOU.
448
00:18:18,297 --> 00:18:19,559
YOU SEE, OUR METHOD
449
00:18:19,598 --> 00:18:22,965
IS TO REASSURE THE PATIENT
BY RE-CREATING NORMAL...
450
00:18:23,001 --> 00:18:24,229
CONDITIONS.
451
00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:26,567
YES, THEN WE TRY
AND GET THEM INTO
A POSITION
452
00:18:26,605 --> 00:18:27,936
WHERE THEY
SUDDENLY FIND
453
00:18:27,973 --> 00:18:30,669
THAT THEY'RE
COMPLETING OTHER
PEOPLE'S SENTENCES...
454
00:18:30,709 --> 00:18:32,404
THEMSELVES.
455
00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:34,002
SPOT ON, MRS...
456
00:18:34,046 --> 00:18:35,377
SMITH.
457
00:18:35,414 --> 00:18:37,746
GOOD, WELL, TRY NOT
TO OVERDO IT TO...
458
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:38,579
BEGIN WITH.
459
00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:39,549
KEEP IT TO ONE OR TWO...
460
00:18:39,585 --> 00:18:40,643
WORDS...
461
00:18:40,686 --> 00:18:42,620
TO START OFF WITH,
OTHERWISE YOU MAY FIND...
462
00:18:42,654 --> 00:18:43,916
I'M TAKING ON TOO LONG
A SENTENCE
463
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:44,945
AND GETTING COMPLETELY...
464
00:18:44,990 --> 00:18:46,389
STUCK.
465
00:18:46,425 --> 00:18:48,985
GOOD, YES, WELL,
THAT'S ABOUT IT...
466
00:18:49,027 --> 00:18:50,051
FOR NOW, SO...
467
00:18:50,095 --> 00:18:51,585
THANKS VERY
MUCH FOR CALLING.
468
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:52,619
OH, NOT AT ALL.
469
00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:53,631
AND...
470
00:18:53,665 --> 00:18:54,825
I'D JUST
LIKE TO SAY...
471
00:18:54,867 --> 00:18:56,562
THANK YOU VERY MUCH
FOR COMING ALONG.
472
00:18:56,602 --> 00:18:57,591
NOT AT ALL.
473
00:18:57,636 --> 00:18:58,660
AND GOOD...
474
00:18:58,704 --> 00:18:59,671
BYE, MR...
475
00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:00,763
VERNON.
476
00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:01,830
CARL!
477
00:19:01,874 --> 00:19:03,205
YES, DEAR?
478
00:19:03,242 --> 00:19:05,506
I'VE JUST HAD
ANOTHER BABY.
479
00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:07,375
OH, NO.
HOW MANY IS THAT NOW?
480
00:19:07,412 --> 00:19:09,403
UH, 12 SINCE LUNCH.
481
00:19:09,448 --> 00:19:11,416
OH! THERE'S ANOTHER ONE.
482
00:20:14,179 --> 00:20:19,173
THIS IS STONEHENGE, AND
IT'S FROM HERE WE GO TO AFRICA.
483
00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:23,120
WELL, HERE IT IS AT LAST,
THE GOAL OF OUR QUEST.
484
00:20:23,155 --> 00:20:26,921
AFTER SIX MONTHS AND THREE DAYS,
WE'VE FINALLY CAUGHT UP
485
00:20:26,959 --> 00:20:29,792
WITH THE LEGENDARY
WALKING TREE OF DAHOMEY...
486
00:20:29,828 --> 00:20:32,023
QUERCUS NICHOLAS PARSONSUS...
487
00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:36,296
RESTING HERE FOR A MOMENT
ON ITS LONG JOURNEY SOUTH.
488
00:20:36,335 --> 00:20:38,667
IT'S ALMOST INCREDIBLE,
ISN'T IT
489
00:20:38,704 --> 00:20:42,902
TO THINK THAT THIS HUGE TREE
HAS WALKED OVER 2,000 MILES
490
00:20:42,941 --> 00:20:46,308
ACROSS THIS INHOSPITABLE TERRAIN
TO STOP HERE
491
00:20:46,345 --> 00:20:48,404
MAYBE JUST TO TAKE IN WATER
492
00:20:48,447 --> 00:20:52,611
BEFORE THE 2,000 MILES
ON TO CAPE TOWN WHERE IT LIVES.
493
00:20:52,651 --> 00:20:55,085
IT'S ALMOST UNIMAGINABLE,
I FIND
494
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:59,648
THE THOUGHT OF THIS MIGHTY TREE
STROLLING THROUGH NIGERIA;
495
00:20:59,691 --> 00:21:01,158
PERHAPS SWAGGERING A LITTLE
496
00:21:01,193 --> 00:21:03,161
AS IT CROSSES THE BORDER
INTO ZAIRE;
497
00:21:03,195 --> 00:21:05,425
HOPPING THROUGH
THE TROPICAL RAIN FOREST
498
00:21:05,464 --> 00:21:07,056
TRYING TO FIND A QUIET GROVE
499
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:09,124
WHERE IT CAN JUMP AROUND
ON ITS OWN;
500
00:21:09,167 --> 00:21:13,160
SPRINTING UP TO ZAMBIA FOR THE
AFTERNOON, THEN NIPPING BACK...
501
00:21:14,373 --> 00:21:16,534
OH, SUPER.
502
00:21:16,575 --> 00:21:20,944
WELL, I'VE JUST BEEN TOLD
THAT THIS IS NOT IN FACT
503
00:21:20,979 --> 00:21:24,278
THE LEGENDARY
WALKING TREE OF DAHOMEY.
504
00:21:24,316 --> 00:21:29,618
THIS IS ONE OF AFRICA'S
MANY STATIONARY TREES
505
00:21:29,655 --> 00:21:32,215
ARBORUS BAMBER GASCOIGNUS.
506
00:21:32,257 --> 00:21:35,283
IN FACT, WE'VE JUST MISSED
THE WALKING TREE.
507
00:21:35,327 --> 00:21:37,659
IT LEFT HERE AT 8:00
THIS MORNING.
508
00:21:37,696 --> 00:21:40,164
IT WAS HEADING OFF
IN THAT DIRECTION
509
00:21:40,198 --> 00:21:43,497
SO WE'LL JUST SEE IF WE CAN GO
AND CATCH IT UP.
510
00:21:43,535 --> 00:21:44,559
COME ON, BOYS.
511
00:21:51,543 --> 00:21:53,568
WELL, WE'RE STILL KEEPING UP
WITH IT
512
00:21:53,612 --> 00:21:55,512
BUT IT'S SETTING A FURIOUS PACE.
513
00:21:55,547 --> 00:21:58,015
EARLY THIS MORNING,
WE THOUGHT WE'D SPOTTED IT
514
00:21:58,050 --> 00:22:00,780
BUT IT TURNED OUT TO BE
AN ANGOLAN SAUNTERING TREE...
515
00:22:00,819 --> 00:22:02,116
AMAZELLUS ROBIN RAY...
516
00:22:02,154 --> 00:22:04,679
OUT WALKING WITH
A GAMBIAN SIDLING BUSH.
517
00:22:04,723 --> 00:22:05,712
SO, ON WE GO.
518
00:22:05,757 --> 00:22:07,520
IT'S GOING TO BE DIFFICULT.
519
00:22:07,559 --> 00:22:11,393
A WALKING TREE CAN ACHIEVE
SPEEDS OF UP TO 50 MILES AN HOUR
520
00:22:11,430 --> 00:22:13,625
ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S IN A HURRY.
521
00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:16,660
SUPER.
522
00:22:16,702 --> 00:22:19,136
WELL, RUPERT HAS SPOTTED
SOMETHING.
523
00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:22,504
THIS COULD BE IT...
A WALKING TREE ON THE MOVE.
524
00:22:25,977 --> 00:22:27,911
BUT WHAT RUPERT
HAD IN FACT DISCOVERED
525
00:22:27,946 --> 00:22:29,504
WAS SOMETHING VERY DIFFERENT...
526
00:22:31,950 --> 00:22:34,680
THE TURKISH LITTLE RUDE PLANT.
527
00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:38,383
THIS REMARKABLY SMUTTY PIECE
OF FLORA WAS USED BY THE TURKS
528
00:22:38,423 --> 00:22:40,015
TO RAM UP EACH OTHERS'...
529
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,757
AH, NO!
530
00:22:43,795 --> 00:22:46,992
IN FACT, IT WAS SOMETHING
EVEN MORE INTERESTING.
531
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:51,528
YES, THERE IT WAS, OVER
THE OTHER SIDE OF THE CLEARING...
532
00:22:51,570 --> 00:22:54,004
THE LEGENDARY PUKING TREE
OF MOZAMBIQUE.
533
00:22:54,039 --> 00:22:56,701
NO, WHAT THEY'D COME ACROSS
WAS A TRIBE LOST TO MAN
534
00:22:56,742 --> 00:22:57,936
SINCE TIME IMMEMORIAL...
535
00:22:57,976 --> 00:23:00,206
THE LEGENDARY BATSMEN
OF THE KALAHARI.
536
00:23:00,245 --> 00:23:02,543
PRIMITIVE CUSTOMS
STILL SURVIVE HERE
537
00:23:02,581 --> 00:23:05,345
AS IF THE MARCH OF TIME
HAD PASSED THEM BY.
538
00:23:05,384 --> 00:23:07,545
BUT FOR ALL THE MUMBO JUMBO
AND SUPERSTITION
539
00:23:07,586 --> 00:23:10,146
THE BATSMEN OF THE KALAHARI
ARE FORMIDABLE FIGHTERS
540
00:23:10,188 --> 00:23:12,816
AS WE CAN SEE IN THIS RARE
FOOTAGE OF THEM IN ACTION
541
00:23:12,858 --> 00:23:14,348
AGAINST WARWICKSHIRE.
542
00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:17,726
WARWICKSHIRE HAD DISMISSED
THE KALAHARI BATSMEN FOR 140
543
00:23:17,763 --> 00:23:19,355
BUT THEN IT WAS THEIR TURN
544
00:23:19,398 --> 00:23:21,992
TO FACE THIS EXTRAORDINARY
KALAHARI ATTACK.
545
00:23:22,033 --> 00:23:25,491
PRATT WAS THE FIRST TO GO,
BUT PRATT AND PRATT PUT ON
546
00:23:25,537 --> 00:23:27,596
A SECOND WICKET STAND OF NAUGHT
547
00:23:27,639 --> 00:23:31,097
WHICH WAS BROKEN BY ODINGA
IN HIS MOST HOSTILE MOOD.
548
00:23:41,887 --> 00:23:44,219
THAT'S B. PRATT,
HIT WICKET... NAUGHT.
549
00:23:44,256 --> 00:23:46,554
BUT PRATT AND Z. PRATT DUG IN
550
00:23:46,591 --> 00:23:50,823
AND TOOK THE SCORE TO A HALF
BEFORE Z. PRATT RAN AWAY.
551
00:23:55,801 --> 00:24:00,761
BUT OUT CAME M.J.K. PRATT TO
PLAY A REAL CAPTAIN'S INNINGS.
552
00:24:00,806 --> 00:24:03,138
HE'D TAKEN HIS OWN SCORE
UP TO NAUGHT
553
00:24:03,175 --> 00:24:06,372
WHEN HE MISTIMED A SHOT
OF BOWANGA AND WAS L.B.W.
554
00:24:13,418 --> 00:24:16,251
TYPICAL OF UMBONGA'S HOSTILE
OPENING SPELL
555
00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:18,449
WAS HIS DISMISSAL OF V.E. PRATT
556
00:24:18,490 --> 00:24:21,288
WHO OFFERED NO RESISTANCE
TO THIS DELIVERY...
557
00:24:24,563 --> 00:24:26,190
AND HE WAS CAUGHT BEHIND.
558
00:24:27,933 --> 00:24:31,596
BUT BY LUNCH, THE SITUATION
HAD CHANGED DRAMATICALLY.
559
00:25:08,807 --> 00:25:10,434
AND SO, WITH
THE TENSION COLOSSAL
560
00:25:10,475 --> 00:25:12,102
AS WE COME UP
TO THE LAST BALL...
561
00:25:12,143 --> 00:25:13,804
THAT'S ALL FROM US.
562
00:26:36,361 --> 00:26:38,386
GOOD EVENING.
563
00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:40,057
OVER £400,000 MILLION
564
00:26:40,098 --> 00:26:43,966
WERE WIPED OFF THE VALUE
OF SHARES THIS AFTERNOON
565
00:26:44,002 --> 00:26:47,699
WHEN SOMEONE IN
THE STOCK EXCHANGE COUGHED.
566
00:26:47,739 --> 00:26:50,640
SPORT... CAPITAL PUNISHMENT
IS TO BE REINTRODUCED
567
00:26:50,675 --> 00:26:52,643
IN THE FIRST AND SECOND
DIVISION.
568
00:26:52,677 --> 00:26:54,611
ANY PLAYER FOUND TACKLING
FROM BEHIND
569
00:26:54,646 --> 00:26:57,513
OR CONTROLLING THE BALL
WITH THE LOWER PART OF THE ARM
570
00:26:57,549 --> 00:26:59,414
WILL BE HANGED.
571
00:26:59,451 --> 00:27:02,477
BUT THE ELECTRIC CHAIR REMAINS
THE STANDARD PUNISHMENT
572
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,078
FOR THREATENING THE GOALIE.
573
00:27:04,122 --> 00:27:06,352
REFEREES' CHAIRMAN
LEN GOEBBELS SAID
574
00:27:06,391 --> 00:27:09,087
"AT LAST, THE REFEREE
HAS BEEN GIVEN TEETH."
575
00:27:09,127 --> 00:27:13,689
FINALLY, POLITICS... THE LATEST
OPINION POLL PUBLISHED TODAY
576
00:27:13,732 --> 00:27:17,759
SHOWS LABOR AHEAD WITH 40%,
THE A.A. SECOND WITH 38%
577
00:27:17,802 --> 00:27:19,326
AND, NOT SURPRISINGLY
578
00:27:19,371 --> 00:27:23,068
KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN RUNNING
THE LIBERALS A VERY CLOSE THIRD.
579
00:27:23,108 --> 00:27:24,735
AND NOW, BACK TO ME... HELLO.
580
00:27:24,776 --> 00:27:28,268
AND NOW IT'S TIME TO GO OVER
TO HUGH DELANEY AT PAIGNTON.
581
00:27:28,313 --> 00:27:31,043
HELLO, AND WELCOME TO PAIGNTON
BECAUSE IT'S FROM PAIGNTON
582
00:27:31,082 --> 00:27:33,243
THAT WE TAKE YOU STRAIGHT BACK
TO THE STUDIO.
583
00:27:33,284 --> 00:27:35,980
HELLO, AND IT'S FROM HERE
WE GO OVER THERE.
584
00:27:36,021 --> 00:27:38,489
WELL, WE'RE ALREADY HERE,
SO LET'S GO OVER THERE.
585
00:27:38,523 --> 00:27:39,854
WELCOME BACK.
586
00:27:39,891 --> 00:27:42,485
AND NOW IT'S TIME
FOR PART EIGHT OF OUR SERIES
587
00:27:42,527 --> 00:27:45,360
ABOUT THE LIFE AND WORK
OF URSULA HITLER
588
00:27:45,397 --> 00:27:46,728
THE SURREY HOUSEWIFE
589
00:27:46,765 --> 00:27:48,630
WHO REVOLUTIONIZED
BRITISH BEEKEEPING
590
00:27:48,667 --> 00:27:51,363
IN THE 1930s.
591
00:27:51,403 --> 00:27:54,167
THAT WAS A PARTY
POLITICAL -CAST
592
00:27:54,205 --> 00:27:57,003
ON BEHALF OF
THE LIBERAL PARTY.
593
00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:06,000
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll