[DJ SPEAKS IN SPANISH ON RADIO]
[CAR HORN]
[KIDS YELL AND SCREAM]
MAN 1: Just tell him, damn it!
MAN 2: Tell him to give him coffee. MAN 1: You tell him!
MAN 2: Give me that!
MAN 2: Look, get him some coffee or cookies.
[FLY BUZZES]
[CAR HORN]
I know that!
MAN 2: Give me the phone.
[FLY BUZZES]
[SCREAMING]
MAN 3: Hey!
Where do you think you're going?
MAN 4: Going home.
MAN 3: Hey. Hey!
[POLICE SIREN]
MAN 3: Officer.
The guy walked into the bushes, maybe to pee, but he never came back.
Do you need help?
Do you own this car?
That's not him. The guy walked into the bushes.
He said he was going home.
Going home?
Gentlemen, return to your cars.
What about the car?
I'll radio for a tow truck.
MAN 5: Let's shove it out of the way. We'll get this lane moving!
It's dangerous.
We got a lot of glass and steel rushing by us at high speeds.
MAN 5: Wait a minute.
Prendergast. Downtown Robbery. Let's go.
I'm in linoleum tile, myself.
All right. You, back in your vehicle.
You push. I'll steer.
MAN 3: We do ceramics too. Special discount for law officers.
I love Cops, the TV show. Don't you watch it? I never miss it.
You're lucky you caught me.
I am?
Today's my last day as a cop.
Lucky me.
Don't touch it!
Just get this lane moving.
Okay. Sorry.
Officer?
[PHONE RINGS]
WOMAN: Oh, my God! The phone!
Come on, baby.
Watch your fingers.
Take Tucker, okay?
Hello?
GIRL: Mom?
WOMAN: Hello?
Mom, can you help me open this?
Hello?
[WOMAN HANGS UP]
Can I get some change for the phone, please?
No change. Have to buy something.
-Eighty-fie sen. -What?
Eighty-fie sen.
-I don't understand. -Eighty-fie sen!
Eighty-five cents?
It doesn't give me enough money for the phone call.
I'll give you 50 cents. You give me 50 cents change.
-No way. -Yes, way.
Drink, eighty-fie sen. You pay or go!
I don't understand "fie." There's a "V" in the word "five."
No "V's" in China?
-Not Chinese. I'm Korean. -Whatever.
You come to my country, take my money and don't even learn my language?
You're Korean?
Do you have any idea how much money my country has given your country?
How much?
I don't know. It's a lot. You can bet on that.
You go now! No trouble!
I stay.
What do you think of that?
Where are you going? You got a bat?
What are you doing? That bat--
Let go. Let go!
Jesus Christ! What is this?
The last stand on Fiji?
-Take the money! Take the money! -What?
Take the money.
Take your hands away from your-- I can't under-- Stop it!
FOSTER: All right. Speak slowly and distinctly.
Take the money.
You think I'm a thief?
You see, I'm not the thief.
I'm not the one charging 85 cents for a stinking soda!
You're the thief!
I'm just standing up for my rights as a consumer.
I'm rolling back prices to 1965. What do you think of that?
Doughnuts. Package of six. How much?
$1.12.
Too much.
Aspirin. Price?
$3.40.
Oh, please!
AA batteries. Package of four.
$4.29.
Nice try.
This whole shelf looks suspect.
One soda...
... 12 ounces.
Fifty sen!
Sold.
It's been a pleasure frequenting your establishment.
Very funny.
Very, very funny.
LYDECKER: Genuine Arizona sand, Prendergast. Get used to it.
PRENDERGAST: I bet.
Genuine Santa Monica sand's more like it.
It's from my cat's litterbox, but he said you could keep the lumps.
You took my stuff out first?
Heck, no. How fun would that be?
PRENDERGAST: How do I get a pen out? -Don't need no pen. Use the cat turd.
It's your last day. Be careful. Remember Forsythe?
-Forsythe got 5 minutes to retirement. -Two!
Two minutes, nothing! The guy was on the way to his fucking car.
Mowed down by a runaway impound. Nasty.
BRIAN: Ironic. LYDECKER: Ironic as fuck!
GRAHAM: Anything can happen today.
You know how dangerous a desk can be.
Watch out for paper cuts.
PRENDERGAST: Funny, funny, funny.
Sorry. I tried to dissuade them.
Hey, Sandra. It's obligatory, I guess.
Now, what else do they have up their sleeve?
-Nothing. -Nothing?
Are we still on for lunch? You're not going home early?
Why would I go home early?
Last day and all.
I'm not superstitious.
-Sandy, you ready? -In a minute.
Leave the poor desk jockey alone.
SANDRA: See if you know how to start the car.
Let's not get our pantyhose in a bind.
I'll miss you, Prendergast.
You really will? Me too.
LYDECKER: Come on, let's go!
-Lunch? -Yup.
ADELE: Mommy! BETH: Just a second, baby.
ADELE: When will we make the strawberry cake?
Soon. I thought sundown would be good.
-Here. Not in the house. -Okay, mom.
Just a few kids. I didn't want to do a whole big thing.
No.
[BUSY SIGNAL]
[PHONE RINGS]
Prendergast here.
-Hi. -Hello?
-It's me. -Hi.
I wish you were home. Wouldn't you come home now?
What's wrong?
I don't know.
I got a little scared....
I'd really like you to come home.
What is it, honey?
I don't know. I was wrapping some...
...some glasses up and some things...
...and I got really scared.
You're not doing this move just for me, are you?
You really want to do it, don't you?
The important thing is we're together. That's what counts.
Yeah, but you're not here.
Well, I will be soon, baby.
Say it.
-Say it! -I'll be home soon.
No, say it!
I'll be home soon, and I love you.
I love you too.
-Feel better? -No, I don't feel better!
SINGING: London Bridge is falling down
Falling down, falling down
London bridge is falling down Help me.
My fair lady
You my fair lady?
Yes.
-Bye. -Bye-bye.
What you doing, mister?
Nothing.
GANG MEMBER 1: You're trespassing on private property.
-Trespassing? -Loitering too.
That's right. You're loitering too.
FOSTER: I didn't see any signs.
What you call that?
-Graffiti? GANG MEMBER 1: No, man.
That's not fucking graffiti! That's a sign.
GANG MEMBER 2: He can't read it, man.
GANG MEMBER 1: I'll read it for you. It says this is private property.
No fucking trespassing.
This means fucking you!
-It says all that? GANG MEMBER 1: Yeah!
If you wrote it in English, I'd fucking understand it!
-Thinks he's being funny. -I'm not laughing.
-I'm not either. -Hold it, fellas.
We're getting off on the wrong foot.
This is a gangland thing, isn't it?
We're having a territorial dispute?
I've wandered into your pissing ground or whatever the damn thing is...
...and you're offended by my presence. I understand that.
I mean, I wouldn't want you people in my back yard, either.
This is your home...
...and your home is your home. I respect that.
So if you would just back up a step or two...
...I'll take my problems elsewhere.
Fair enough?
-What do you think? -He should pay a toll.
Good idea.
You should pay a toll.
Listen, fellas...
...I've had a rare morning. I'm not in the mood to--
What should he pay?
How about that briefcase?
Good idea.
Give us your briefcase, man.
I'm not giving you my goddamn briefcase.
Motherfucker, give us your motherfucking briefcase!
Okay.
I was willing to mind my own business.
I was willing to respect your territory and treat you like a man.
You couldn't let a man...
...sit here for five minutes to rest on your precious piece-of-shit hill?
Want my briefcase? I'll get it for you, all right?
You want my briefcase? Here's my briefcase!
Where are you going?
You forgot the briefcase!
I'm going home! Clear the path, you motherfucker!
Clear the path!
I'm going home!
How'd they do that?
CLERK: Gun! -What?
You're leaving today, right? I gotta get your gun.
PRENDERGAST: Right.
I need your John Doe right here, here and here.
Got time to take a statement?
I know you wanna go before you get killed....
Yeah, Brian, I'm still working here.
This guy's a little excited.
Mr. Lee, come on in.
[LEE SPEAKING IN KOREAN]
What'd he say?
You know, I don't know. Mr. Lee is Korean.
I'm Japanese, in case you never bothered to notice.
-Mr. Lee, speak English, okay? -Sure.
Sit down.
He'll help you. Mr. Lee owns a market. He was hit less than an hour ago.
Sorry, Mr. Lee, no smoking.
Mr. Lee, let's just start off with what he looked like.
White man, white shirt, tie.
-What color was his tie? LEE: Color?
I don't know color. The guy attack me, okay?
He bust up my store. I'm lucky to be alive.
Just try and relax. What did he steal from you?
Did not steal! Attack me, okay?
Say he fix my prices. Bust up my merchandise.
He didn't rob you?
The guy crazy! I told him, "Take my money."
He say no. He call me "thief," then he break up my merchandise.
Then he buy a soda and take off.
He bought a soda. He paid for it?
I told you, the guy crazy.
Sorry, I thought this was a robbery.
BRIAN: Mr. Lee, we have to go talk to somebody else.
BRIAN: This man works robberies. LEE: Robberies?
BRIAN: That's right. Come on.
LEE: Baseball bat! PRENDERGAST: What's that?
-The guy take my baseball bat. -You sell bats?
No, keep for defense. Under counter. Defense.
You mean he stole your baseball bat but paid for the soda?
This guy's discriminating.
That still doesn't count. Let's go. Thanks.
Go to the hospital. Your arm might be broken!
We'll look for this guy, so shut the fuck up!
What did this guy do? Threaten you with his credit card?
I told you he had a bat!
If this guy's still around, we'll find him and fuck him up.
Then you go to the hospital?
Shut up!
[PHONE RINGS]
Hello?
Cut the crap. I know it's you. What do you want?
BETH: It is you, isn't it?
Yeah.
Yeah, it's me.
You gotta stop calling me.
It's Adele's birthday.
Yes, I know. What do you want?
I'm coming home.
What are you talking about?
I just....
I want you to know that I'm coming home for her birthday.
You're not coming here.
Listen, Beth...
...I gotta see you.
No, you listen to me. This is my house now. I pay the rent.
You don't pay child support.
-You just can't walk in and out. -Don't talk like that, Beth.
I have to come home.
I have to bring her a present.
You know you can't come here!
Hey!
It's him! It's him, man!
How's Adele?
This isn't your home anymore.
How is she?
She's doing just fine without you.
-Angie, get out. -Come on, man.
It's fucking broad daylight! This shit ain't worth it!
-Get the fuck out! -Get out of the car!
Give me one. Give me one.
-And you? -Don't.
I'll call the police.
Go, go, go!
-I'm coming home. -No.
Did you get him?
[CAR CRASHING]
You missed.
I missed too.
No, don't fucking do it!
No, man. Fuck you, mother--!
There, you see?
That's the concept.
Take some shooting lessons, asshole!
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
She's open.
Prendergast.
Have a seat.
Captain.
Did you hear?
The drive-by shooting?
Disgusting!
You know who'll have to take the heat again...
...when the shit hits the fan.
You're retiring a little early.
You won't be getting your full pension.
Yes, sir, that's right. I won't.
This isn't because you were wounded, is it?
Wounded?
Because, I mean...
...you're behind a desk now.
Not much chance of getting wounded there.
Look, captain, it has nothing to do with that.
I'll make my speech.
They make me do this, you understand.
I hate to lose a good cop.
Not too late to change your mind.
Lot of good cops want to drop the whole kit and caboodle.
And who wouldn't?
The pay stinks...
...and you're up to your ears in human scum 16 hours a day.
But it gets in your blood.
A lot of good cops get to the point of...
...slapping their badge down on this desk...
...and find they just can't do it. How about you?
Will you stick with the team?
No, captain. I don't think I will.
Like I say, they make me ask. You understand.
How are the kids?
I don't have any.
What the hell?
I'd like to take my stick to these clerks.
-The file says-- -We lost a child.
-Lost it? -Her. Lost her.
Yes, of course. Her. That's rough.
Well, it can be. Yes, sir.
Still married, right?
Yes, sir, I am.
That's good.
Where you going?
-I'm going home. -Not this way.
-Why not? -Metrorail construction, that's why not.
Go around.
Just follow your tootsies.
You sure you don't want something? Coffee, soda, something?
OFFICER: No, thank you, ma'am.
I feel kind of stupid about this.
Better safe than sorry.
That's what I thought.
You have a restraining order against your husband?
Ex-husband.
He'd show up on the wrong day...
...or in the middle of the night, pounding on the door.
Thing is, he has this horrendous temper.
I didn't know if a restraining order was a good idea...
...and if it'd do more harm than good.
But the judge said we should make an example of him.
So he can't come within 100 feet of us.
Or is it yards? Which is it? Feet or yards?
That's up to the judge.
-I thought it was a set thing. -It's at his discretion.
That's interesting.
Does he drink?
Oh, I thought you meant the judge!
-No, I wouldn't say so. -Do drugs?
Oh, no.
But he has a propensity for violence?
Yeah, I think you could say that.
Did he strike the little girl?
-Well, no. -Did he strike you?
Not exactly.
Not exactly?
You know, there were times...
...when I thought he was going to...
...but I just didn't want to wait until he got around to it.
It's hard to explain.
He could, I think.
You think?
Hello, sir. How are you today?
I'm doing all right.
-How about you? -Me? I'm terrible.
I'm sorry.
I came from Santa Barbara, and my friend wasn't home...
...and he owes me money...
...so I have no money to go home.
I'm almost out of gas. I had to sleep in my car.
Do you have a few bucks? It would really help me out.
Give me your address, I'll mail it back. Honest.
-Let me see your driver's license. -What for?
It'll have your address on it.
-I don't have a license. -You drove all the way without it?
Are you a cop?
Let's see your car registration and your car.
All right, forget it. Okay, just forget it!
MAN: That's a hell of a way to treat a vet, man.
-You're an animal doctor? -No, a veteran. I was in Nam.
FOSTER: You must've been 10 years old.
I meant to say the Gulf.
Come on! All I'm asking for is a little change.
I haven't eaten in three days.
Well, I mean, except for this.
Fuck it! Give me some money, man. Just give me some money.
How about a dime? Give it to me.
I'm not giving you any.
-You got a cigarette? -No.
-You gotta give me something. -Why don't you get a job?
This is my park. I live here!
Who are you, walking through my park with two bags?
I don't got any. Is that fair?
What's in those bags, anyway? Give me one.
I could sell those bags and eat for a week with the money.
You've got two of them. Why do you need two?
You're right.
Here.
-Are you serious? -I don't need it anymore.
All right! Come on, now. Come on. What the--
Son of a bitch!
[SANCHEZ SPEAKS IN SPANISH]
JONES: Can we cut the crap this time? ANGIE: I'm telling you the truth!
JONES: Yeah, right.
PRENDERGAST: What's up? KEENE: She was at the drive-by.
SANCHEZ: Angie, who hit your guys? ANGIE: I told you.
JONES: We know. The big bad white man. We're not buying it.
SANCHEZ: Who are you protecting?
They put your boyfriend in the hospital. He's probably dead.
Do you realize that? He's probably fucking dead!
ANGIE: Stop saying that! KEENE: You picked a good day to leave.
SANCHEZ: You want another 3-year-old to get shot in the head?
Is that what you want?
[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]
Tell me the truth!
I'm telling you the truth!
It was a white guy!
JONES: Why would he go for your friends? ANGIE: I don't know!
He attacked them on Angel's Flight Hill with a baseball bat!
PRENDERGAST: A baseball bat? Wait!
Baseball bat. What did this guy look like?
I don't know. He looked like you...
...except he was taller and had hair.
JONES: Good description, Angie!
Did he wear a white shirt and tie?
SANCHEZ: Come over here, will you?
We gotta keep the pressure on her. Don't interrupt.
What about the bat?
-The white shirt and tie! -What will she think of next?
I'm sorry you're leaving, but you are.
-Sanchez, listen to me! -Check me later, babe.
PRENDERGAST: Hey, Brian?
Remember that storekeeper, the Korean guy?
-Mr. Lee? -Come here.
PRENDERGAST: Where was his place?
Right there.
He was assaulted sometime after 8 a.m.?
-About that. -And the drive-by was here, right?
What's going on?
I may be nuts, but Angel's Flight Hill is between those two spots.
-It was a classy neighborhood. -It's a shit hole. Gangland.
I know. What would a white guy in a shirt and tie be doing in...
...gangland?
Hi. Can I help you?
I'd like a ham and cheese Whamlette, an order of Wham fries--
Sorry, we stopped serving breakfast. We're on the lunch menu.
I want breakfast.
We're not serving it.
So you said.
Is that the manager?
Yeah.
Could I speak to him, please?
Sure.
Rick, a customer would like to speak to you.
-Yes, sir. -I'd like some breakfast.
We stopped serving breakfast.
I know you stopped breakfast, Rick. Sheila told me you stopped....
Why am I calling you by first names? I don't know you.
I call my boss "mister" after 7 years, but I walk in here, a stranger...
...and I'm calling you Rick and Sheila like we're in an AA meeting.
I don't want to be your buddy, Rick. I just want a little breakfast.
You can call me Miss Folsom if you want to.
We stopped serving breakfast at 11:30.
Have you ever heard the expression, "The customer is always right"?
Yeah.
Well, here I am.
The customer.
That's not our policy.
You have to order something from the lunch menu.
I don't want lunch.
I want breakfast.
Yeah, well, hey, I'm really sorry.
Yeah, well, hey, I'm really sorry too!
RICK: He's got a gun!
Let's get organized!
Calm down!
Just calm down, everybody. Sit down over there!
Mister.
Where are you going?
No. You sit down there, and you finish your lunch.
Everybody just relax and take it easy.
Eat your lunch. Please.
You all need your vitamins A, B and--
Don't! It was an accident!
It's the trigger, it's sensitive. It's okay!
It's a sensitive trigger.
Could I have my breakfast?
Yes, sir. Sheila?
FOSTER: Rick? Miss Folsom?
You know what?
You were right. I've changed my mind.
I'm going to have some lunch.
Could I have a double Whammyburger with cheese--
-You getting this? -Yes, sir.
And an order of Whammy fries and, let's see...
...a Choco-Wham shake.
Yes, sir. Sheila, get his order.
FOSTER: Rick, could you get it for me, please?
I feel comfortable calling you Rick after all we've been through together.
FOSTER: How you doing?
Enjoying your meal?
How about you? Is it good?
And you, ma'am? How's the food?
I think we have a critic.
I don't think she likes the special sauce.
That's a joke.
Now, here we go.
Thank you.
See, this is what I'm talking about.
Look at that.
See what I mean? It's plump, juicy, three inches thick.
Look at this sorry, miserable, squashed thing.
Can anybody tell me what's wrong with this picture?
Anybody?
Anybody at all.
LITA: You guys are partners again!
No such luck, Lita. He's moving to Lake Havasu.
-What's in Lake Havasu? -London Bridge.
-Are you going to England? -They moved it to Arizona.
-Stone by stone. -Oh, yeah. I heard about that.
You're better off, because cops get killed.
-What'd we used to get, six? -Seven.
Two sevens.
-You all right? -Yeah.
You sure?
What?
I'm sorry, I wasn't gonna do this.
I should just shut up. It's none of my business.
PRENDERGAST: Tell me.
Lake Havasu?
It's nice. We like it.
She likes it.
What'll you do, watch cactus grow?
Cacti.
She's not handling middle age too well.
The change of life and all that, whatever it is that is.
What about you?
Me? It's different, because she's a woman.
Different? I'm a woman.
But she was once very beautiful.
Thanks a lot!
You know what I mean. Come on, come on.
She could've been anything. Anything but a cop's wife.
She's high-strung.
Don't give me that queen of the hop, homecoming queen bullshit again.
That was a long time ago.
Sandra, you have a career.
It's hard to lose your beauty when that's all you've got.
What about your career?
I'll be okay...
...you know, even without you.
Sorry to break this up.
SANDRA: Why are you here? LYDECKER: We got a call.
Watch out! Hot plates!
-Don't touch my gun. LITA: Fuck you!
You'll love this one. Some dickhead went into Whammyburger...
...pulled out a gun when he couldn't get breakfast.
Then he paid for it and left.
-Sorry, Prendergast. -He paid for it?
Yeah. Move your buns. Let's go.
I gotta go.
PRENDERGAST: Where was this?
Quintero and Fourth. Bye, ladies.
PRENDERGAST: Wait a minute. Wait, wait!
Let me know what this guy was wearing, okay?
You trying to crack a big one before you disappear into the desert?
Sandra, find out if he's wearing a white shirt and tie.
Let's go, lovebirds.
-I gotta go. -Wait.
Something about my wife. Maybe I never mentioned it.
What?
I love her.
LYDECKER: Let's go!
STRIKER: For seven years, I banked here.
When I asked them for a loan, a small loan...
...they told me that I was not "economically viable."
Excuse me, sir. Excuse me.
How'd your loan work out? Did they give you a loan?
He must be economically viable!
There's a man with a smiling face. A happy customer.
That's what an economically viable person looks like!
FOSTER: How much is the...?
SALESMAN: That is only $3.
STRIKER: I asked them for a small loan. You know what they told me?
I was not economically viable.
POLICE OFFICER: That's enough.
-I'll buy this. -Yes, sir. That is $3.
STRIKER: I'm going away now! I'm going away, everybody!
This is what happens if you're not economically viable!
STRIKER: Don't let this happen to you!
Bye, everybody!
Don't forget me.
I'm sorry.
We're leaving now.
You are? Really?
It doesn't look like your husband's gonna show.
He probably realized he could get into trouble if he harassed you.
You should call your lawyer and tell him about it.
It's one of those services. I didn't have much money.
Have them call your husband's lawyer, make it official.
In the meantime, lock up. And if anything else happens, call us.
-Okay, thanks. -Sure thing.
MAN: Excuse me. Hey, excuse me!
If you haven't noticed, others are waiting to use the phone.
-Others want the phone? -Right, asshole!
Jeez, that's too bad, because you know what?
I think it's out of order.
[COINS JINGLING]
[PHONE RINGS]
Yeah, Prendergast.
Hi, it's me.
He's eating and resting comfortably now.
-Who is? -Mr. Peepers.
Good! -I'm sorry about before.
I really blew my top....
That's okay, honey. Could you hold on one second?
-Prendergast. -White shirt and tie.
Could you hold on?
I gotta go.
Just one second. It's very important.
Detective Torres! Excuse me.
We have about 7 million people waiting to make a statement.
Let me call you right back.
What's wrong? What are you doing?
Nothing's wrong. What do you mean?
-You come home then. -I can't.
It's your last day. What are they going to do, fire you?
There's a lot of red tape. As soon as I get done, I can go home.
I'll call you in a while, okay?
Wait a minute. Make a list.
-A list? -We need boneless chicken...
...skinless. Red peppers...
...not green, red.
Honey, hold on one second.
I am tying up the phone here.
Just listen for once in your life.
A girl at the drive-by said a man in a shirt and tie...
...attacked her homeboys with a baseball bat.
Somebody's let that dog off the leash.
I think you've got last-day-itis.
This man was not swinging a bat. He has a gym bag full of guns.
MAN: Miss, do you work here?
A gym bag?
You asked me to tell you what he wore. I gotta run.
We have to canvass the neighborhood.
One more second.
Please. It's important.
-Why don't you go to the store? -Why?
It's my last day.
The guys might want to have a send off or something.
What're they gonna do? Get some broad...
...with tassels dangling, dancing on your desk?
Course not.
Look, while you have been playing cop...
...I'm at home planning your retirement.
It's over. The sooner you get that, the better.
You are no longer in the law-enforcement business.
Now, I will expect you at the usual time. Capito?
Sandra, are you mad at me?
-I hate you, but I'm not mad. -You retiring too?
Just don't leave without saying goodbye.
Goodbye.
If you go up against this guy...
...be careful.
-Hi. -Hi.
I'm Nick.
What can I do you for?
I'm just looking for some hiking boots.
Well, well. Hiking boots, huh?
Let's see what we got.
These are the top of the line.
Scientifically engineered and all that crap.
Guaranteed by some Sierra Club asshole not to hurt a chipmunk...
...if you step on it.
Personally, I think they're for pussies and faggots!
Now these...
...are Vietnam jungle boots.
Cost half as much, last twice as long and are great...
...for stomping queers!
When you're done, you gotta clean out the waffle with a stick...
...but you can't have everything, right?
Forget it.
Come on, let's go.
Have a nice day, fellas!
Y'all come back now, you hear?
You got a problem, buddy?
-Huh? Huh? NICK: Uh-uh.
You got the problem!
SHOPPER 1: No, you do, buddy! NICK: Read the sign!
NICK: "I reserve the right."
Now take a hike.
Make me.
Take it easy, Mary. Take it easy.
SHOPPER 1: Jesus! NICK: Come on, make your play.
Would you just come on! I don't need this shit today.
SHOPPER 1: Fucking redneck!
Fascist!
Fucking faggots!
You believe this shit?
Jesus!
Alternate lifestyle, my ass!
Imagine what those pumpkins do with each other when they're alone!
And what about the muff divers? Think about it.
-Sergeant Prendergast. -She don't have to talk!
What do you want? I admitted it was a gang!
She don't have to say a word!
I know it was a white guy. We gotta talk. It's important.
[IN SPANISH]
How many guns were in the gym bag?
I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't see no gym bag!
The white guy took it, right? More people could get hurt.
Now help me out.
The bag was already in the car when I got in.
How many guns were in it?
I don't know.
Lots of guns.
They got all the guns in the fucking world.
NICK: Good?
[DOOR BUZZES]
Hi.
Can I help you?
Police officer. I'm looking for a man.
Are you now?
SANDRA: Late 30s...
...white shirt and tie...
...he'd be carrying a gym bag.
What's the police scanner for?
My own personal amusement.
Seen anyone like I've described?
NICK: Nope.
SANDRA: Okay, thanks. NICK: Listen.
Tell me something.
Why don't they call you guys...
...officer-esses?
I beg your pardon?
You know, like actress? Like that?
Something to signify...
...you know.
I guess they feel that a police officer is a police officer...
...not a...
..."you know."
Thanks for your cooperation, sir.
Sorry I couldn't be of more help, officer-ess.
Why'd you do that?
There's something I wanna show you.
I'm not gonna turn you in. I'm your friend.
Come on.
I don't bring just anybody back here.
This is my own private stash.
I got some great stuff here.
Boo! World War I. Good shape.
Speaking of gas, wait a minute.
Wait just a minute.
You know what was in this?
Zyklon-B.
You remember?
What the Nazis had?
Listen.
Empty.
This was used, man.
This was actually used.
I wonder how many kikes this little can took out.
Think about it. Here.
Why are you showing me this?
I'm not.
That's just for fun. You can keep that.
This is what I want to show you.
The real thing.
Heat-seeking, shoulder-fired. It's fucking disposable!
You can take out a jet with one of these monkeys.
It's for you.
-I want you to have it. -Why?
Because I'm with you.
Don't you get it?
I listened to the scanner. I heard about Whammyburger.
Fucking fantastic!
It's a bunch of niggers, right? On TV, it's always white kids.
But when you go in there, it's nothing but a bunch of niggers!
They'll spit on your food if you're not nice.
I know all about it.
I'm with you.
We're the same, you and me.
We're the same. Don't you see?
We are not the same.
I'm an American. You're a sick asshole.
What kind of vigilante are you?
I am not a vigilante.
I'm just trying to get home for my little girl's birthday.
And if everybody will stay out of my way, nobody will get hurt.
Fuck you!
Who the fuck are you? Are you fucking with me?
I am just disagreeing with you!
In America, we have freedom of speech, the right to disagree!
Fuck you and your freedom!
Who the fuck are you?
You fuck! You faggot fuck!
Gonna take my rocket.
I ought to shoot you, motherfucker! Now turn around!
Now lean on that counter! Go on, lean on it!
Look at this shit!
What is this doing in there?
-Faggot shit! -No!
You want freedom, huh? I'll give you fucking freedom!
Further back. Feet farther back.
Spread them out. Farther.
You're going to jail, motherfucker! How's that for freedom?
Freedom to get fucked up the ass by some big buck nigger.
Give me your hand.
He's gonna be right behind you, just like this.
Think about it. You gonna like that, faggot?
You gonna like that, you faggot fuck? Give me your other hand.
-I can't. -Why not?
Gravity.
Gravity? What the fuck does that mean?
I'll fall down.
Now give me your other hand! Give it to me now!
Give it to me! Give it to me!
Come on. Come on.
Give it to me.
Aah!
This isn't one of mine.
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, my God!
-Oh, my God! FOSTER: Good!
Freedom of religion.
Now you get the swing of it!
Feels good to exercise your rights.
I'm listening.
We got a nutcase with a bag full of guns.
He's in Hollywood, heading west.
YARDLEY: What is he up to?
PRENDERGAST: He's up to a lot of trouble.
Never mind, we've got a hallway full of suspects.
It wasn't a gang thing. I can tell you that.
Angelina is a tramp and a liar.
We don't appreciate you interfering with our investigation.
I've got a positive ID on the gym bag, okay?
What's this?
A gym bag.
Does this mean you're putting me under arrest?
You guys take off.
I gave you that speech earlier...
...because that's regulations. They make me do it.
This one's from me. I've never liked you.
You know why? You don't curse. I don't trust a man who doesn't curse.
Not a "fuck" or a "shit" in all these years. Real men curse.
And I don't like a man who's afraid to hit the street.
-It's bad for morale. -I'm not afraid.
Get back behind that desk where you belong...
...and don't waste any more of my time pretending you're a cop.
A man in a white shirt and tie shot up a phone booth near the Whammyburger.
-Did you hear me? -I heard you.
Right about here, right?
How did you know?
He got the bag of guns at the drive-by.
Then you were right.
Excuse me.
-What is wrong with you? -Me?
I'm a coward, the captain told me. Get out of my way.
Hey, look. It is your own fault.
You let everybody think that, when it was your wife.
She made you get off the street.
What happens between me and my wife is nobody's business but mine!
Sorry, I've been a bitch all day.
She didn't make me quit. I came home late one night...
...and found her sitting in the dark.
She thought I'd been killed.
She thought I was a ghost. I had to chase her all over the house.
-I'm sorry. -Forget it.
-Where are you going? -See if I can earn my last day's pay.
Let me go with you.
I thought you were on duty.
What do you say, partner?
Fuck them!
Go!
[PHONE RINGS]
Hello?
FOSTER: Who were you talking to a while ago?
You're trying to scare me.
Am I succeeding?
No, you're not succeeding. So you just might as well stop it.
And you're not scaring me out of my own house.
And you're not coming here.
But I am. I'm on my way. You can count on that.
I'm past the point of no return.
Do you know when that is?
That's the point in a journey...
...where it's longer to go back to the beginning...
...than it is to continue to the end.
It's like....
Remember when those astronauts got in trouble?
They were going to the moon and something went wrong.
They had to get back to Earth...
...but they had passed the point of no return.
So they had to go all the way around the moon to get back...
...and they were out of contact for hours.
Everybody waited to see if a bunch of dead guys in a can...
...would pop out the other side.
That's me.
On the other side of the moon now...
...out of contact...
...and everybody's just going to have to wait till I pop out.
The police are here.
Did you know, Beth...
...that in certain South American countries it's still legal...
...to kill your wife if she insults you?
They're here right now. I'm looking at one right now.
Put him on the phone.
SANDRA: What are we gonna do? PRENDERGAST: Talk to the Korean guy.
Then we just start banging on doors.
SANDRA: What is it?
Where are you going?
I'll be right back.
I'm sure the guy will let you use his bathroom.
Prendergast, what are you doing?
-I know who this guy is! -Who is he?
He had a personalized license plate. What the hell was it?
It said, "D-Fens."
Defense?
D-dash-F-E-N-S. "D-Fens."
They said he was on his way home. Go check out his address.
Mr. Lee!
Defense!
[ADELE LAUGHING]
BETH: Honey, honey. No, no.
Hold it! Back up.
MAN: You dumb bitch! You cut me off! What's wrong with you!
Move back! Out of the way!
What are you, a moron?
If I wanted to be in a parking lot, I'd buy a ticket, you dumb bitch!
You can't come this way.
What are you doing?
Fixing the street! What does it look like?
Two days ago, it was fine.
You're saying it fell apart in two days?
Well, I guess so.
Pardon me, but that's bullshit!
I don't think anything's wrong with the street.
You're trying to justify your budgets.
-Are you nuts? -I know how it works.
If you don't spend your budget, you won't get any money next year.
I want you to admit nothing's wrong with the street!
Fuck you, pal!
You're not gonna hold us hostage with these yellow lights and big trucks.
I'm just here to keep people from falling in. That's all.
I want to hear it from you.
What's wrong with the street?
I don't know. I really don't. I think it's a sewer job.
You're lying.
What's wrong with the street?
Nothing.
I knew it.
See, I knew it was fine.
But I'll give you something to fix.
WORKER: Oh, Jesus-- -Here!
WORKER: Hey, Charlie! Oh, please, man!
We got a goddamn nut here!
WORKER: Fucking guy back there with a bazooka!
Pull that thing off.
-What thing? -That.
Then pull on both ends. It gets bigger.
Like this?
Now flip that thing up. It's your aimer.
How do you know?
I saw it on TV.
What's the name of the movie?
What's the movie you're making?
Under Construction. You like it?
It's all right. Where's the cameras?
The cameras are on. Just stand back.
What do I do now?
Just look through the aimer. What you aiming at?
That yellow monster down there.
Look at it and pull the trigger. It's really easy.
Trigger?
That one right there.
But aim first, man.
Look out!
-Nothing happened. -Must have been a dud or something.
Cool, man!
What is it? I'll sic the dog on you!
Police officers, ma'am.
PRENDERGAST: How are you?
SANDRA: Where's the dog?
He's dead.
WOMAN: What is it? SANDRA: We need to ask some questions.
SANDRA: Just a few questions, ma'am.
What kind of questions?
Do you have a warrant?
SANDRA: You invited us in.
WOMAN: Now I'm inviting you out.
SANDRA: What relation are you to William Foster?
WOMAN: What are you saying? He's my son. I don't want you here.
Would you look at this? This is really amazing.
Amazing!
Does he have another house, another place he might call home?
Now, this is a what?
PRENDERGAST: A dragon? MRS. FOSTER: Don't touch that!
Why would he do that? This is his home.
MRS. FOSTER: I want you to go now. PRENDERGAST: Did this one melt?
That one.
It's a giraffe, drinking.
PRENDERGAST: Mm-hm.
Now, of all of these, which is your very favorite?
Right now, I think this skunk.
That's lovely.
MRS. FOSTER: That's not paint.
You know, his stripe.
It isn't?
MRS. FOSTER: It might be, but it's not painted on.
It's in the glass.
What the hell?
JIM: It's the groundskeeper.
FRANK: Well, if he is, he's out of uniform. Hey, you there!
What are you doing there?
FOSTER: Just passing through.
Nobody said you could play through. Get off my hole.
He said he was passing through.
He's not a member. Look how he's dressed.
Get off my golf course!
I am!
FRANK: Go back the way you came!
I don't like his looks. Leave him alone.
What am I paying dues for? This is my golf course!
If I want to play here, I will!
If he gets hit with my Titleist, that's his problem!
Don't yell at me. I'm just here playing with you--
Fore!
Five!
Wait a minute!
What the hell you trying to do? Kill me with a golf ball?
It's not enough you got all this land for your little game?
But you had to kill me with a golf ball?
You should have children playing here. Family picnics.
You should have a petting zoo...
...instead of electric carts for you old men with nothing better to do.
JIM: Frank, what's wrong? Frank!
Aren't you ashamed of yourself?
JIM: I gotta get some help! FOSTER: What's wrong with you?
JIM: Help! FOSTER: Your heart?
Something's wrong with your heart? What can I do?
Pills! Pills!
Pills?
Where are they?
Cart, cart.
JIM: Call the paramedics! My friend just had a heart attack!
I guess you're out of luck. Your little cart's gonna drown.
Aren't you sorry you didn't let me pass through your golf course?
Now you're gonna die wearing that stupid little hat. How does it feel?
This is his room.
You're a very neat and tidy lady.
He cleans his own room.
Now don't make me call you a liar.
If he wasn't at work, I'd be afraid to set foot in here.
What's he been doing lately?
Same as ever.
Building important things to protect us from the Communists.
He works at Notec.
The defense plant.
D-Fens.
Call Notec and see if you can get him.
So what's going on with your son?
-How do you mean? -You know exactly what I mean.
Sometimes he sits through an entire meal without saying a word.
He just shovels food into his mouth like a machine.
I get so nervous...
...I can't swallow.
I'll sit there with the same piece of food in my mouth.
I have to spit it out. When I do, he looks at me...
...like he'd like to kill me.
Don't tell him I said that.
I promise I won't.
I try not to be a burden. I'm not just talking financial.
How could you be a burden to anyone?
If William, or Bill, as I like to call him--
He likes Bill. I call him Bill too.
If Bill said he was going home...
...could he have meant where his wife and child live?
Ex-wife. We shouldn't be in here.
PRENDERGAST: Ex-wife, right. Elizabeth. What's her maiden name?
Trevino. She was part Italian. You know how they are.
-Where's Elizabeth now? -I wouldn't know.
You don't know where your grandchild lives?
He doesn't want me to know. He blames me for what happened.
What's the word?
-He was fired over a month ago. MRS. FOSTER: What?
Where has he been going every day?
Where has he been eating his lunch?
Why are you putting barbed wire on that fence?
Is it a joke?
Is this how rich people have fun? You put barbed wire on the fence...
...so innocent people like me can cut our hands?
No, please. I'm the caretaker.
It's just a barbecue.
Dr. Ashcroft has let us do this before.
You don't live here?
Is it really necessary to tell them?
Tell who?
Altmore Security.
Aren't you with them?
[SIRENS WAILING]
No, please!
It's okay, honey. It's okay, baby.
What kind of doctor lives here?
Plastic surgeon.
Plastic surgery bought all this?
FOSTER: Guess I'm in the wrong racket.
Are there correspondence courses in plastic surgery?
I lost my job.
Actually, I didn't lose it. It lost me.
I'm overeducated, underskilled....
Maybe it's the other way around. I forget.
And I'm obsolete.
I'm not economically viable.
I can't even support my own kid.
Are you hurt? I'm sorry.
I didn't hurt you, honey. I'm sorry.
MAN: It's all right. It's your hand.
You cut your hand.
It's my hand.
-Please take me with you. -No!
They won't do anything if I'm with you.
Just please let them go.
What do you think? You think I want to hurt your family?
I have a family of my own.
You don't believe me?
We believe you.
That's where I'm going. I'm going home to see my family.
It's my little girl's birthday today.
We were gonna have a barbecue, like you guys...
...and she was gonna play outside...
...and my wife would hold my hand...
...and talk about grownup things.
And then when it got dark...
...we'd all go to sleep together.
We'd all sleep together in the dark.
And everything...
...would be just like it was before.
You can't leave. Believe me, something's happened to him.
It doesn't take all day to drive from Pasadena to Venice.
That doesn't constitute a threatening phone call.
The guy was talking about Star Trek or something.
-He's getting a kick out of scaring you. -Please don't leave.
There's only one thing you can do to really feel safer.
Next time there's a proposition...
...to cut the number of patrol cars on the street, vote no, okay?
Have a nice day.
[CAR ENGINE STARTS]
PRENDERGAST: What have you found so far?
No luck on Foster-Trevino.
Go straight to the maiden name.
I've got something on an Army-Navy store.
-Where? -Here.
Jesus, Prendergast, I was there!
That guy was a prick.
You know what else he was?
Murdered. They found him stuffed in his own display case.
Oh, my God!
Here, I'll help you.
[PHONE RINGS]
Hello?
You know what they did?
They turned our ice-cream parlor into a Southwest American, New Age thing.
I went to buy a rocking horse.
All I could find was a unicorn with an Indian on top of it.
Can you believe that, Elizabeth? Can you believe it?
BETH: Come on!
ADELE: Where are we going? When's my birthday?
Some G.I. Joe gave a geezer a heart attack at the golf course...
...and accosted a family right next door.
SANDRA: A G.I. Joe?
He's wearing the kind of jacket you find in an Army-Navy store.
SANDRA: I found her! Trevino, Elizabeth. PRENDERGAST: Don't tell me.
Venice.
How'd you know?
Where else would an Italian move to?
FOSTER [SINGING]: Look what I got.
We got a puppy. We got a puppy.
Happy birthday to you
[PHONE RINGS]
Hi, puppy!
No answer at the ex-wife.
-You send the cavalry? SANDRA: No, Pacific Division are pricks.
They can't send units to the same address three times in a day...
...to comfort some hysterical woman.
-What do you want to do? -Go to Venice.
[PHONE RINGS]
Prendergast here.
Who the fuck is this?
Shit. It's your wife.
Oh, boy. Hon?
Yeah, "hon." I know who that was!
Mr. Peepers just scratched the shit out of me...
...and I'm bleeding like a stuck pig.
Something important's come up.
What am I? Dog vomit?
Your wife says she's bleeding to death...
...and you say something important has come up?
-When are you coming home? -I don't know.
Don't tell me you don't know.
I want to know when the hell you're coming home, now!
Amanda, shut up!
Did you hear me? Shut up!
I'll get home when I'm finished, not a second before. Is that clear?
Is that clear?
You don't have to bite my head off.
And you have dinner ready and waiting for me, okay?
And leave the skin on the chicken. All right?
Goodbye.
Shit!
Let's go!
Surprise!
I'm sorry, Prendergast!
We tried and tried, but could not fit your fucking name on the cake!
Congratulations. You made it out alive!
-Listen, listen. -All right, hold it, hold it.
Ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've been waiting for.
This afternoon's entertainment, Miss Suzie!
Suzie Q!
Do your thing!
Is this the retiring boy?
Wait, wait! This is great, guys.
This is great. I appreciate it, but I can't stay.
Jesus! What's your problem? You afraid of women too?
I don't blame him. You ever met his wife?
What did you say?
-What? -What did you say?
-Nothing. -We don't have time for this.
You're right.
FOSTER: Ready, honey?
[BETH AND FOSTER SINGING] Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday...
...to you
No cake for you?
BETH: If she doesn't want it, don't force her.
FOSTER: Okay, you can have the teddy.
Time to go horsy!
[ADELE CRIES]
FOSTER: Oh, It's okay. Horsy! It's okay.
Giddyap, giddyap.
BETH: She doesn't want to. FOSTER: Just put her on the horse!
FOSTER: There we go! Horsy ride.
She doesn't want to.
FOSTER: Put her on the horse! BETH: You can't force her like that.
FOSTER: I bought her the goddamn horse.
Here we go! Horsy ride.
BETH: You're scaring her. I want you to stop this.
FOSTER: Come on, honey. It's your birthday. It's the pier.
It's your favorite place. You love the pier.
FOSTER: Why do you do this?
[TIRES SCREECH]
Take the back.
[GUNSHOT]
[DOG BARKING]
You okay?
-I'm all right. -Somebody get an ambulance.
Get an ambulance! Call 911! Get an ambulance!
Tell them an officer's been shot! Go, go, go! Get an ambulance!
Be careful.
Go get the bastard!
He's still dressed like G.I. Joe!
Daddy! Mommy, look. Daddy!
Hi, honey. I thought I'd find you here.
Leave us alone!
What? I can't talk to my wife?
I'm not your wife anymore.
No? Sugar, does this ring a bell? "Till death do us part"?
Do you remember that?
FOSTER: I'm sorry.
Sorry, sorry.
What are you doing?
I'm coming home from a hard day at the office.
God bless the working stiffs!
Please leave her alone!
Adele?
You're so big!
How'd you get so big?
I missed it.
They stole it from me, honey.
Don't you worry. They're not gonna take it anymore.
Bill, listen, please.
You've got to stop this.
You need help.
You're sick.
Sick?
You wanna see sick?
Take a walk around this town. That's sick.
PRENDERGAST: You ain't kidding.
Would you believe it that I used to fish right here?
This very spot?
Now they tell you, "Don't eat the fish. It's poisonous."
You can't even swim in the water.
It'll give you some kind of bacterial infection.
How's that for sick?
I'm having a private moment with my family. Leave us alone.
PRENDERGAST: I'm leaving soon.
I'm retiring to Arizona. Lake Havasu City.
You been there?
That's not what I mean!
They call it a lake, but it's really just a big bowl of muddy water.
But the wife thinks it's paradise.
Everybody has their own idea of what paradise is.
Take me, for instance.
You know what I thought paradise was?
FOSTER: What? -If you'll excuse me.
Making babies.
Ain't that a kick? Making babies.
This your little girl?
Beautiful.
She's special.
You know, my wife never was cut out for motherhood.
She did it all for me.
Went through all that pain, lost her figure, for me.
Then the kid went to sleep one night, never woke up.
They called it "Infant Death...
...Syndrome."
But she wasn't an infant. She was 2 years old.
She was a big girl.
She was our baby.
Here, darling, this is for you. Here you go.
What can you do?
If she'd been hit by a drunk driver....
But who do you blame when they just don't wake up?
FOSTER: Thank you, sweetheart.
[SIRENS WAILING]
TOURIST: There's a guy with a gun!
FOSTER: No! Don't!
Elizabeth, no!
PRENDERGAST: Freeze! You're under arrest.
Get out of here!
FOSTER: Elizabeth! PRENDERGAST: Freeze!
-What were you gonna do? -I don't know!
Guys like you always say that!
You know exactly what you were gonna do. Kill your wife and child!
Then it'd be too late to turn back. It'd be easy to kill yourself.
Let's go meet some nice policemen. They're good guys. Let's go.
-I'm the bad guy? -Yeah.
How did that happen?
I did everything they told me to.
Did you know I build missiles?
I help to protect America.
You should be rewarded for that.
Instead, they give it to the plastic surgeon. They lied to me.
Is that what this is about? You're angry because you got lied to?
Is that why my dinner's drying out in the oven?
They lie to everybody. They lie to the fish!
That doesn't give you any right to do what you did today.
The only thing that makes you special is that little girl. Now, let's go.
Let's go!
Sure was hot today, wasn't it?
He has a gun! The end of the pier!
Keep this crowd back! Let's get some backup!
You know, I got a gun.
In my pocket.
I got lots of guns.
Stay there. Don't move.
You wanna draw?
Let's not. Let's call it a day.
Now, come on.
It's perfect.
Showdown between the sheriff and the bad guy?
It's beautiful.
On three.
This doesn't have to be the end. You have a choice.
My little girl is dead. I don't have a choice. You do!
No, you have two choices:
I can kill you.
Or you can kill me...
...and my little girl can get the insurance.
-One.... -Don't you wanna see her grow up?
Behind bars?
-Two.... -Don't do this. Please.
-Let's go! -Three.
I would have got you.
REPORTER 1: What cooperation was there between Pacific Division and Downtown?
Not to denigrate the Venice Police...
...but it was one of our fellows that put this together.
Prendergast!
This is Sergeant Prendergast. Damn fine work, Prendergast.
Fuck you, Captain Yardley. Fuck you very much!
REPORTER 2: I can't believe-- Did he just say that?
YARDLEY: You're welcome.
PRENDERGAST: You still here? -Afraid so.
EMT: We've stabilized her. She'll be all right.
I'll see you at the hospital.
How are you doing?
I haven't told her yet.
Oh, shit!
It's her birthday. What should I do?
Tell her tomorrow.
Let her have her little party.
-What's your name, darling? -Adele.
Adele? That's a nice name.
If I had a little girl, I'd want her to be named Adele.
-What's yours? -Mine?
My name is mud.
Your name is not mud.
It will be when my wife finds out that...
...I'm still a cop.
OFFICER 1: Excuse me.
Sergeant just signed us out.
OFFICER 2: All right, let's eat. OFFICER 1: Where you wanna go?
OFFICER 2: Let's go around the corner and get one of those....
FOSTER [ON TV]: Look what I got!
Just call him, "Hi, Puppy."
Hi, Puppy.
There we are! We got everybody there.
We got everybody--