1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:08,280 -=http://sfile.ydy.com=- proudly presents 2 00:00:12,710 --> 00:00:22,080 -=http://sfile.ydy.com=- sync:ßÇÈâÈâ 3 00:00:24,780 --> 00:00:27,630 South Park Season13 Episode07 4 00:00:38,250 --> 00:00:41,420 You guys! You guys! We can finally do it! 5 00:00:41,430 --> 00:00:45,190 We can finally leave this crappy town and live the life we've al dreamed of! 6 00:00:45,230 --> 00:00:46,330 We can? 7 00:00:46,340 --> 00:00:47,670 What are you talking about,dude? 8 00:00:47,690 --> 00:00:49,740 Haven't you assholes been watching the news? 9 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:51,700 Pirating is back,my friends. 10 00:00:51,730 --> 00:00:54,010 Swashbuckling adventure on the high seas. 11 00:00:54,050 --> 00:00:55,800 The stuff we've all dreamed about! 12 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,130 And it's all happening right here! 13 00:00:58,150 --> 00:00:59,480 Somalia! 14 00:00:59,510 --> 00:01:00,890 Somalia? Where's that? 15 00:01:00,900 --> 00:01:02,430 North africa. 16 00:01:02,450 --> 00:01:03,700 Just picture it,guys! 17 00:01:03,710 --> 00:01:05,750 Clear blue water with skull islands! 18 00:01:05,790 --> 00:01:08,240 Waterfalls with jewelled treasure underneath! 19 00:01:09,390 --> 00:01:12,640 I've worked it all out on expedia,and we can take southwest airlines to miami. 20 00:01:12,670 --> 00:01:14,470 Then dubai air here to cairo. 21 00:01:14,540 --> 00:01:17,830 Then it's just a 49-hour bus ride into mogadishu 22 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:20,660 with all the booty and plunder a pirate could want. 23 00:01:21,110 --> 00:01:23,780 You know,cartman,this is an awesome idea. 24 00:01:23,810 --> 00:01:25,500 You should totally go to somalia. 25 00:01:25,530 --> 00:01:28,250 Right! Wait a minute. 26 00:01:28,260 --> 00:01:30,340 You never think my ideas are good,kyle. 27 00:01:30,600 --> 00:01:32,190 No,i'm being totally serious. 28 00:01:32,220 --> 00:01:34,250 That is the best idea you've ever had. 29 00:01:34,290 --> 00:01:35,860 You should run away to mogadishu. 30 00:01:35,900 --> 00:01:37,320 You should go there right away! 31 00:01:37,340 --> 00:01:38,900 I'll even help plan your trip! 32 00:01:38,940 --> 00:01:41,970 Wow,cool! What a minute. The? 33 00:01:41,980 --> 00:01:43,660 Why would you do that? 34 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:46,380 Unless you're trying to trick me somehow. 35 00:01:46,410 --> 00:01:47,390 No,no! You're right. 36 00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:50,100 Somalia is an oasis of treasure and waterfalls! 37 00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:51,810 It's totally the pirate's life! 38 00:01:51,820 --> 00:01:53,250 Then why don't you want to go? 39 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:56,100 Well,'cuz,dude,i'm jewish.And,you know -- 40 00:01:56,140 --> 00:01:57,820 jews can't be pirates. 41 00:01:57,830 --> 00:01:59,360 That's true. 42 00:01:59,390 --> 00:02:02,400 Well,i'm glad you've come to terms with your disability,kyle. 43 00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:05,260 Gentlemen,i'm off the start planning. 44 00:02:07,610 --> 00:02:10,520 Please,please let him go. 45 00:02:11,380 --> 00:02:14,330 Good morning,students. These are the morning announcements. 46 00:02:14,340 --> 00:02:17,170 Teacher-parent conferences have been rescheduled to next tuesday. 47 00:02:17,190 --> 00:02:18,770 Please inform your parents. 48 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:22,160 The gym is being repainted and is closed until tomorrow afternoon. 49 00:02:22,180 --> 00:02:24,400 And now for a special announcement. 50 00:02:24,420 --> 00:02:26,400 Avast there mateys! 51 00:02:26,440 --> 00:02:29,720 Do you have a thirst for adventure on the high seas of life? 52 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:33,840 Are ye sick and tired of your parents and teachers telling ye what to do all the time? 53 00:02:33,870 --> 00:02:37,160 Then join captain cartman's perfect pirate club! 54 00:02:37,180 --> 00:02:38,800 Just imagine it,me hearties! 55 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:41,680 A life without rules,without homework and chores! 56 00:02:41,700 --> 00:02:44,240 You can live the pirate's life in somalia,me friends. 57 00:02:44,270 --> 00:02:45,590 Even kyle said so. 58 00:02:45,630 --> 00:02:50,640 Our first official pirate meet willing be 4:00 p.m.at kevin stoley's house. 59 00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:52,260 At my house? Why my house? 60 00:02:52,270 --> 00:02:53,970 There will be refreshments served! 61 00:02:54,010 --> 00:02:56,300 So make sure your mom goes to the grocery store,kevin! 62 00:02:56,330 --> 00:02:57,620 So come one,come all. 63 00:02:57,650 --> 00:03:00,450 The invitation is open to any student who wants to be a pirate 64 00:03:00,460 --> 00:03:03,060 and who isn't jewish,mexican or ginger. 65 00:03:04,430 --> 00:03:10,100 And for lunch today,the cafeteria will be serving taco salad or hoagie sandwiches. Thank you. 66 00:03:11,390 --> 00:03:13,400 Ahoy,fellow club members! 67 00:03:13,420 --> 00:03:18,410 Congratulations on leaving your meaningless lives behind to become pirates. 68 00:03:19,450 --> 00:03:23,430 Your life of boredom is at an end,thanks to captain cartman! 69 00:03:23,460 --> 00:03:25,610 All hands on deck! 70 00:03:28,230 --> 00:03:30,290 Attention! 71 00:03:30,930 --> 00:03:32,610 All right,ye booty lubbers! 72 00:03:32,660 --> 00:03:36,060 So you've decided to join captain cartman,didee? 73 00:03:38,660 --> 00:03:42,170 Uhhh,guys. Who let in the g-i-n-g-e-r? 74 00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:46,650 Well,there's really not that many of us. We figured we should let him join. 75 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:51,000 But,guys,g-i-n-g-e-r-s can't be spirits because they don't have souls. 76 00:03:51,030 --> 00:03:52,330 Please get it out of here. 77 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,140 Fine! I don't want to be a pirate anyways! 78 00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:58,050 Okay,anyways. 79 00:03:58,080 --> 00:03:59,480 Now enough small talk lads! 80 00:03:59,490 --> 00:04:01,530 It's time for us to start rappin' and plunderin'! 81 00:04:01,570 --> 00:04:02,640 Yeah! 82 00:04:02,670 --> 00:04:04,100 We set course tomorrow! 83 00:04:04,130 --> 00:04:07,710 I purchased everyone's tickets online using my mudder's credit card. 84 00:04:07,730 --> 00:04:09,660 And your mom is okay with that? 85 00:04:09,670 --> 00:04:11,000 Dude,i'm a pirate! 86 00:04:11,030 --> 00:04:13,660 What the devil do i care what me mudder thinks anymore? 87 00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:14,820 Neat-o! 88 00:04:14,850 --> 00:04:15,980 All right,lads. 89 00:04:16,010 --> 00:04:18,760 Go home and write your farewell letters to your families. 90 00:04:18,770 --> 00:04:21,070 The land of pirates awaits! 91 00:04:21,090 --> 00:04:22,290 Pirates ho! 92 00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:25,080 Pirates ho! 93 00:04:28,300 --> 00:04:30,740 Kevin,goddammit. 94 00:04:36,090 --> 00:04:38,570 Have a good flight. Next,please? 95 00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:43,900 We be heading to somalia,by way of miami to cairo. 96 00:04:43,930 --> 00:04:47,510 And take care ye put us in an exit row,ye landlubber. 97 00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:52,920 I see,you five boys are all booked through to cairo by yourselves? 98 00:04:52,930 --> 00:04:56,460 That we be,lass. It's all paid fer on me mudder's credit card. 99 00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:59,990 Oh,jeez. I don't know if i can really go through with this. 100 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:00,650 What? 101 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:02,510 It's just leaving everything behind. 102 00:05:02,530 --> 00:05:04,810 I can't believe i'm actually doing it. 103 00:05:04,850 --> 00:05:06,650 Yeah,maybe we should think about this. 104 00:05:06,660 --> 00:05:08,690 You guys,the? 105 00:05:08,710 --> 00:05:10,870 Are you forgetting how crappy your lives are? 106 00:05:10,890 --> 00:05:12,430 All the homework? The rules? 107 00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:16,810 Butters,do you really want to just go back to school where people just make fun of you? 108 00:05:16,820 --> 00:05:18,880 - Who? You mean you? - Yes! 109 00:05:18,890 --> 00:05:22,120 - Do you really want to go back to that? - No! I'm sick of it! 110 00:05:22,130 --> 00:05:25,040 Well,all right then,fag! We can't turn back now. 111 00:05:25,050 --> 00:05:27,610 The path to adventure lies just beyond this ticket counter, 112 00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:33,140 And if you four have really come all this way just to turn back now,then seriously you guys -- 113 00:05:33,150 --> 00:05:35,650 The? 114 00:05:35,660 --> 00:05:38,840 He's right,lads. To adventure! 115 00:06:22,390 --> 00:06:24,550 This is somalia? 116 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:28,030 Where's all the waterfalls and shipwreck lagoons? 117 00:06:28,740 --> 00:06:30,450 The? 118 00:06:30,480 --> 00:06:32,200 Excuse me. Where are the pirates? 119 00:06:34,670 --> 00:06:38,300 We're looking for all the pirates.Where can we find the -- 120 00:06:39,060 --> 00:06:41,340 butters,get the phrase book out. 121 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:43,050 Ask can these people where the pirates are. 122 00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:56,640 Oh,he says they're in there! 123 00:06:57,610 --> 00:07:00,110 Ah,nice! Come on,mateys! 124 00:07:00,710 --> 00:07:01,620 ******* 125 00:07:01,630 --> 00:07:03,920 *** 126 00:07:03,930 --> 00:07:06,830 Yes,baka,baka,alaka jam. Thank you. 127 00:07:13,550 --> 00:07:15,530 Avast! 128 00:07:19,130 --> 00:07:22,260 These aren't pirates. They're just a bunch of black people. 129 00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:25,750 ********* 130 00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:28,580 ***** 131 00:07:28,900 --> 00:07:32,270 I'm captain cartman and this here be my terrible crew. 132 00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:35,060 We be looking fer a ship to pirate with 133 00:07:37,090 --> 00:07:39,810 ********* 134 00:07:39,820 --> 00:07:42,400 ********** 135 00:07:42,410 --> 00:07:45,210 ****** 136 00:07:47,790 --> 00:07:49,320 yes,very nice. 137 00:07:49,340 --> 00:07:51,860 Apparently these are the pirates. 138 00:07:54,350 --> 00:07:56,020 ******* 139 00:07:56,030 --> 00:07:58,030 ********** 140 00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:00,170 Ah,excellent! They are taking us to the ship! 141 00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:03,780 Once we commandeer a vessel,the plundering will be easy indeed,lads. 142 00:08:04,210 --> 00:08:05,770 ******** 143 00:08:05,780 --> 00:08:07,510 ***** 144 00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:12,480 This is your pirate boat? Dude. The? 145 00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:15,220 All right,seriously. You guys,what kind of pirates are you? 146 00:08:15,230 --> 00:08:18,520 I mean,really,the,dude. The? 147 00:08:18,530 --> 00:08:19,920 *********** 148 00:08:19,930 --> 00:08:21,400 ****** 149 00:08:21,410 --> 00:08:23,750 All right,lads. Guess we'll have to settle with this meager ship. 150 00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:26,410 Two of you sit aft and two of you sit in the front. 151 00:08:26,430 --> 00:08:29,350 I gotta sit middle 'cuz i get motion sickness. 152 00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:31,850 Kevin,jesus christ. 153 00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:37,790 Hard to starboard,lads! 154 00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:40,210 There's sure to be lots of bootys out here! 155 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:50,960 Clyde,the? 156 00:08:51,390 --> 00:08:56,330 You said there was gonna be crystal clear lagoons and treasure and plunder! 157 00:08:56,790 --> 00:08:59,040 Calm down,clyde. Everything's gonna be okay! 158 00:08:59,310 --> 00:09:04,600 No,it's not. You made me run away and be a pirate and there's not even any treasure! 159 00:09:04,610 --> 00:09:07,320 Ike! Will you do something about clyde,please? 160 00:09:09,490 --> 00:09:11,120 Very nice,ike. 161 00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:12,580 All right,me hearties. 162 00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:15,980 Keep your eyes open for boats to plunder 163 00:09:18,810 --> 00:09:20,210 ********** 164 00:09:20,220 --> 00:09:23,380 ******* 165 00:09:23,390 --> 00:09:24,590 *********** 166 00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:29,190 ****** 167 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,780 ************ 168 00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:35,890 ********** 169 00:09:35,900 --> 00:09:37,410 ****** 170 00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:43,750 ************ 171 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:45,920 ******* 172 00:09:45,930 --> 00:09:48,250 *********** 173 00:09:48,260 --> 00:09:49,470 ***** 174 00:09:49,480 --> 00:09:51,130 ********* 175 00:09:51,140 --> 00:09:52,920 ****** 176 00:09:53,350 --> 00:09:55,700 ************ 177 00:09:55,710 --> 00:09:58,080 ******** 178 00:09:58,090 --> 00:10:00,450 dude,dude! You're doing it all wrong. 179 00:10:00,460 --> 00:10:01,990 Let me handle this. 180 00:10:02,030 --> 00:10:03,790 All right,ya scallywags! 181 00:10:03,830 --> 00:10:07,550 Surrender your plunder lest we start firing shots across yer bow! 182 00:10:07,560 --> 00:10:09,220 ******** 183 00:10:09,230 --> 00:10:11,230 ************ 184 00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:13,980 Yeah,that's good but now go "arrrgh!" 185 00:10:20,350 --> 00:10:22,610 Yeah? Okay,and you checked with kenny and token? 186 00:10:22,620 --> 00:10:24,040 He's not just staying at their houses? 187 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:25,080 No,dude. Everyone's checked. 188 00:10:25,090 --> 00:10:27,400 I think cartman really ran away to somalia. 189 00:10:27,410 --> 00:10:28,390 Yes! 190 00:10:28,430 --> 00:10:30,250 I can't help but take some credit for this. 191 00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:31,610 I helped convince him to go! 192 00:10:31,650 --> 00:10:33,130 You really he'll die in somalia? 193 00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:34,540 For sure,dude! 194 00:10:34,580 --> 00:10:36,800 It's the most god forsaken place on the planet. 195 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:39,100 Things are finally gonna be normal around here! 196 00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:40,370 Oh,god! 197 00:10:40,410 --> 00:10:42,760 Oh,god,what did we do wrong,gerald? 198 00:10:42,790 --> 00:10:44,380 Take it easy. We'll find him! 199 00:10:44,390 --> 00:10:45,660 I'll call you back. 200 00:10:45,690 --> 00:10:47,230 Oh,kyle! He's gone! 201 00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:49,600 Your little brother's run away from home! 202 00:10:49,630 --> 00:10:51,050 What? Are you sure? 203 00:10:51,060 --> 00:10:54,540 He left a note saying he's never coming back! 204 00:10:54,550 --> 00:10:57,620 "dear mommy and daddy. I am running away. 205 00:10:57,630 --> 00:11:02,050 I am sorry,but i cannot longer handle the monotony of middle class life. 206 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:03,880 Everyone at school is a idiot, 207 00:11:03,930 --> 00:11:07,560 and if one more person talked to me about that Susan boyle performance of "les miserable" 208 00:11:07,590 --> 00:11:10,080 i was going to puke my balls out through my mouth. 209 00:11:10,100 --> 00:11:12,020 I love you all,but i have to move on. 210 00:11:12,060 --> 00:11:16,360 I'm going to somalia to be a -- to be a pirate!" 211 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,350 Oh,oh,gerald. What are we going to do? 212 00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:21,880 It's all right. He couldn't have gone far. Let's call the other kids' house s. 213 00:11:23,070 --> 00:11:26,360 Oh,god,what have i done 214 00:11:27,390 --> 00:11:30,720 ********** 215 00:11:31,180 --> 00:11:33,430 ****** 216 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:35,750 the are you pirates doing? 217 00:11:35,790 --> 00:11:36,940 Are we gonna plunder them or not 218 00:11:36,950 --> 00:11:38,460 ********* 219 00:11:38,470 --> 00:11:41,250 ******* 220 00:11:41,260 --> 00:11:44,180 *********** 221 00:11:44,190 --> 00:11:46,070 ******** 222 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:53,950 ************* 223 00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:56,710 all right,let's go 224 00:11:57,540 --> 00:11:59,690 ************** 225 00:11:59,700 --> 00:12:02,770 ********* 226 00:12:03,580 --> 00:12:04,970 ************** 227 00:12:04,980 --> 00:12:06,510 ********** 228 00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:08,780 quiet,ye sons of biscuit eaters! 229 00:12:08,810 --> 00:12:10,870 This boat is now pirate property! 230 00:12:10,900 --> 00:12:13,700 Now get ye to yer lifeboat lest ye wanna be shark bait! 231 00:12:13,710 --> 00:12:15,240 ********* 232 00:12:15,250 --> 00:12:17,890 Plunder the booty,lads! This ship is ours! 233 00:12:17,900 --> 00:12:19,280 Okay! 234 00:12:19,300 --> 00:12:21,410 I said get off me boat! 235 00:12:21,420 --> 00:12:24,830 *********** 236 00:12:36,660 --> 00:12:39,050 That's it! Get in there ya swarmy dogs! 237 00:12:39,610 --> 00:12:41,580 Lower 'em down,ike! 238 00:12:41,590 --> 00:12:44,590 ********* 239 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:46,880 Have a good day! 240 00:12:55,460 --> 00:12:57,310 Hard to port,lads. 241 00:12:57,330 --> 00:12:59,220 Hard to port! 242 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:00,980 What's port? 243 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,740 Just make the boat go that way,kind of 244 00:13:15,700 --> 00:13:18,000 that's good! Now bring 'er round topside! 245 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:27,580 Now that's a pirate ship. 246 00:13:32,480 --> 00:13:36,150 Ah,a fine day of plunderin' we had,boys. What about yourselves? 247 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:39,500 Here ya are,lads. Plenty of booty to go around. 248 00:13:40,540 --> 00:13:42,450 A round of grog for me boys. 249 00:13:42,470 --> 00:13:45,060 A round of grog for everyone. 250 00:13:47,610 --> 00:13:49,060 The is this? 251 00:13:49,090 --> 00:13:51,500 This is water in a dixie cup! 252 00:13:51,510 --> 00:13:53,320 All right,goddammit. Really,you guys. 253 00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:55,780 What kind of pirates are you? Look at yourselves! 254 00:13:55,790 --> 00:13:57,810 You're a disgrace to blackbeard! 255 00:13:57,830 --> 00:14:00,250 I don't know where you people get off calling yourselves pirates -- 256 00:14:00,270 --> 00:14:02,580 Little beat-up boats,water in dixie cups. 257 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:06,060 I mean look! Look at this guy! Look at this guy,for christ's sake! 258 00:14:09,850 --> 00:14:12,620 I mean how hard is this,people? 259 00:14:13,260 --> 00:14:15,520 I tell ya lads,if we're gonna be the most feared people on earth 260 00:14:15,550 --> 00:14:18,380 Then there needs to be some goddamn changes around here! 261 00:14:18,410 --> 00:14:21,550 We drink and we pillage and we do what we please 262 00:14:21,570 --> 00:14:23,750 And we get all we want for free 263 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:28,050 we'll kick your ass Then rape your lass somalian pirates we 264 00:14:28,060 --> 00:14:30,380 so with a yo ho ho 265 00:14:32,490 --> 00:14:34,550 uh,goddammit,people. 266 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:36,900 With a yo ho ho 267 00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:38,460 yo ho,ho 268 00:14:38,470 --> 00:14:40,420 and with a yee hee hee 269 00:14:40,430 --> 00:14:42,050 yee hee hee 270 00:14:42,060 --> 00:14:44,060 We take to the african sea 271 00:14:44,070 --> 00:14:48,700 we'll brave the squalls And bust your balls somalian pirates we 272 00:14:48,710 --> 00:14:52,380 somalian pirates we 273 00:14:52,390 --> 00:14:57,020 We left our homes and we left our mudders to go on a pillaging Spree 274 00:14:57,030 --> 00:15:01,510 we'll cut off your ears and break your toes and make you Drink our pee 275 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:06,080 and if ye sail into our waters you best hear this Decree 276 00:15:06,090 --> 00:15:08,290 we'll take your boat and set yer ass afloat 277 00:15:08,300 --> 00:15:10,610 - somalian pirates we - nice! 278 00:15:10,620 --> 00:15:12,820 With a yo ho ho yo ho ho 279 00:15:12,830 --> 00:15:15,050 and a trick a lotty do trick a loty do 280 00:15:15,060 --> 00:15:17,440 We'll shoot you in the face with our glee then we'll cut off your -- 281 00:15:17,450 --> 00:15:19,100 Okay. Let's stop there for a minute. 282 00:15:19,110 --> 00:15:21,820 Rember on "trick a lotty do" that's an loddy do,okay? 283 00:15:21,850 --> 00:15:25,350 Really need you guys to enunciate the lotty. Uh,nadif? 284 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:29,820 If i can get you and abdikarim to sing the harmony on the second yo ho. 285 00:15:29,830 --> 00:15:31,490 And ue,hashmish,is it? 286 00:15:31,520 --> 00:15:32,410 I'm sorry,but you're a little flat. 287 00:15:32,450 --> 00:15:34,590 Rember to sing out. Don't close your throat. Okay? 288 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:38,890 So let's go from uh,bar 14. Pick up after the quarter rest. Ike? 289 00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:42,460 - Somalian pirates we - better! 290 00:15:42,470 --> 00:15:44,690 With a yo ho ho a yo ho ho 291 00:15:44,700 --> 00:15:46,860 And a trick a lotty do 292 00:15:46,870 --> 00:15:48,920 we'll shoot you in the face with glee 293 00:15:48,930 --> 00:15:52,030 Then we'll cut off your c c coca and feed it to a crock 294 00:15:52,040 --> 00:15:53,870 somalian pirates we 295 00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:59,300 somalian pirates we 296 00:15:59,310 --> 00:16:04,310 somalian pirates we 297 00:16:05,270 --> 00:16:10,120 We found them adrift.******** 298 00:16:10,380 --> 00:16:11,850 ***** 299 00:16:11,890 --> 00:16:14,890 What's causing them to suddenly be so much more active? 300 00:16:14,910 --> 00:16:16,460 Is the crew okay? 301 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:19,040 Yes,sir. They're french,so they surrendered immediately. 302 00:16:19,050 --> 00:16:22,140 Once the pirates boarded your ship,how did they force you off? 303 00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:24,460 Elles avait lightsaber! 304 00:16:24,470 --> 00:16:26,490 Oui! Un light saber! 305 00:16:26,500 --> 00:16:29,350 Le lightsaber terrible! 306 00:16:32,270 --> 00:16:36,950 Sir,the pirates appear to have forced the french crew off their boat with a lightsaber. 307 00:16:36,970 --> 00:16:38,320 My god. 308 00:16:38,350 --> 00:16:40,600 The pirates are getting better equipped every day. 309 00:16:40,630 --> 00:16:43,460 Gentlemen,i want the president of the united states on the phone. 310 00:16:43,490 --> 00:16:46,100 We can no longer fight the pirates on the seas. 311 00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:48,950 We have to take them out where they live. 312 00:16:53,550 --> 00:16:56,450 What did i tell you,butters? This is the good life,huh? 313 00:17:00,650 --> 00:17:01,520 What's going on? 314 00:17:01,530 --> 00:17:03,200 ********** 315 00:17:03,210 --> 00:17:06,550 ************ 316 00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:09,750 Ah,good. A hostage will bring a fine ransom! 317 00:17:14,170 --> 00:17:17,810 Well,well,well,well,well 318 00:17:19,170 --> 00:17:22,190 this is cnn. 319 00:17:23,700 --> 00:17:27,620 breaking news of yet another pirate cris in somalia. 320 00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:32,720 Members of nato receive word today that pirates have captured an american child 321 00:17:32,750 --> 00:17:36,570 And are demanding 10 million euros for his safe release. 322 00:17:36,610 --> 00:17:41,880 U.s.navy ships have been deployed and the pirate standoff is about to get ugly. 323 00:17:41,890 --> 00:17:46,460 Well,well,well,well,well,well,well,well,well,well,kyle. 324 00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:49,250 You came all this way to try and join my pirate club. 325 00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:51,200 No,fatass,i came to get my brother! 326 00:17:51,220 --> 00:17:53,560 We all have to get out of here! It isn't safe! 327 00:17:53,570 --> 00:17:55,010 It isn't safe. 328 00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,390 That's not what you said back in the cafeteria,kyle. 329 00:17:57,430 --> 00:18:00,230 In the cafeteria you said somalia was awesome. 330 00:18:00,260 --> 00:18:01,910 I know. I was lying then. 331 00:18:02,140 --> 00:18:03,550 Or are you lying now? 332 00:18:03,590 --> 00:18:05,790 So many lies,kyle,you can't even keep them straight! 333 00:18:05,820 --> 00:18:09,530 You just couldn't stand that we were living in paradise while you were back home. 334 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:11,480 This isn't paradise,and you know it. 335 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:13,130 The people here are starving and dying. 336 00:18:13,170 --> 00:18:16,320 The whole world has used somalia as a dumping ground for toxic waste. 337 00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:18,890 Even the fish here are radioactive. 338 00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:26,000 Cartman,just give me my brother and let us get out of here. 339 00:18:26,010 --> 00:18:29,100 Your brother is with butters taking inventory of our latest plunder,kyle. 340 00:18:29,140 --> 00:18:33,110 You just sit tight until we hear about your ransom money. 341 00:18:33,820 --> 00:18:36,520 One box of italian passports! 342 00:18:36,530 --> 00:18:38,440 One necklace -- Gold! 343 00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,550 Three crew member watches. 344 00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:43,510 Excuse me. Can i ask you a question? 345 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,630 Oh,sure,guleed. 346 00:18:46,670 --> 00:18:48,900 Why did you americans come here? 347 00:18:48,940 --> 00:18:50,780 Well,'cuz our lives sucked back home. 348 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:52,850 We had all these rules and homework. 349 00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:54,240 Yeah,homework! 350 00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:55,890 And our parents hollered at us. 351 00:18:55,910 --> 00:18:56,720 Yeah! 352 00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,010 So we wanted to come here and be pirates. 353 00:18:59,030 --> 00:19:00,000 Pirates! 354 00:19:00,020 --> 00:19:01,930 But that's what i do not understand. 355 00:19:01,980 --> 00:19:05,350 Why would anyone want to be a pirate? 356 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:11,940 Every day,i dream that i can go to school,learn about the world. 357 00:19:11,970 --> 00:19:16,930 But my mother,she's dying of aids,and there is no money for medicine. 358 00:19:16,980 --> 00:19:20,940 My father was killed trying to find food for us. 359 00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:25,160 Do you know how i feel every time we try to capture a boat? 360 00:19:25,180 --> 00:19:26,400 Scared. 361 00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:29,380 And not just scared,because i might get killed, 362 00:19:29,420 --> 00:19:32,710 But scared because if i don't get something out of it, 363 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:35,710 my family and friends are going to die. 364 00:19:35,750 --> 00:19:37,750 I don't want to be a pirate. 365 00:19:37,790 --> 00:19:40,420 I have don't see how anybody would. 366 00:19:45,340 --> 00:19:47,270 Oh,my god. 367 00:19:47,300 --> 00:19:51,540 Jeez,guess we kinda got put in our place,huh,ike? 368 00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:54,430 I feel like an asshole. 369 00:19:54,460 --> 00:19:57,000 Yeah,me,too. 370 00:19:59,490 --> 00:20:02,210 Go on! Walk the plank,ye scurvy dog! 371 00:20:02,220 --> 00:20:03,540 Cartman,knock it off! 372 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:06,030 That's captain cartman,ye jewswoggle 373 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:10,310 ********* 374 00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,800 ****** 375 00:20:13,300 --> 00:20:16,910 eric! Hey,eric! Listen,we wanna go home. 376 00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:17,760 What? 377 00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:23,270 Me and ike,we been talking and,well,guys,we really had it pretty good back in america. 378 00:20:23,290 --> 00:20:27,810 I mean,sure,it's easy to think our lives are boring and full of rules, 379 00:20:27,850 --> 00:20:30,250 But a lot of people have it way worse. 380 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:33,180 The pirates' life isn't a life of fun and adventure. 381 00:20:33,210 --> 00:20:35,290 It's a life of hardship and suffering. 382 00:20:35,330 --> 00:20:39,840 When you get down to it,we were pretty lucky to have the lives we did. 383 00:20:43,180 --> 00:20:44,190 Clyde? 384 00:20:44,220 --> 00:20:47,200 I hate it here. It wanna go home! 385 00:20:47,990 --> 00:20:50,440 You guys cannot leave the pirate club now! 386 00:20:50,460 --> 00:20:53,530 How can you not want to stay in this paradise we've created? 387 00:20:53,540 --> 00:20:55,570 In somalia people have no laws! 388 00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,790 They have no rules and they never grow old! 389 00:20:57,800 --> 00:21:00,730 They never grow old because they die before they're 30! 390 00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,800 Nobody's going anywhere! 391 00:21:02,820 --> 00:21:05,180 I'm the captain of this outfit. 392 00:21:05,670 --> 00:21:07,820 To arms! 393 00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:13,310 Now is there any question who's in charge? 394 00:21:13,330 --> 00:21:16,980 I have an entire pirate crew willing to do anything for me 395 00:21:16,990 --> 00:21:18,960 ******* 396 00:21:21,010 --> 00:21:24,590 all right,men. Remember,do not hit the white ones! 397 00:21:25,180 --> 00:21:29,090 Me and my crew are gonna go on pirating forever! 398 00:21:38,330 --> 00:21:39,890 Clear. 399 00:21:43,270 --> 00:21:45,440 The?