1 00:00:01,827 --> 00:00:03,829 ♪ MTV 2 00:00:12,316 --> 00:00:13,452 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park ♪ 3 00:00:13,535 --> 00:00:15,410 ♪ Gonna have myself a time 4 00:00:15,493 --> 00:00:16,929 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪ 5 00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:18,844 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪ 6 00:00:18,931 --> 00:00:20,067 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park ♪ 7 00:00:20,150 --> 00:00:21,895 ♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪ 8 00:00:21,978 --> 00:00:23,719 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪ 9 00:00:23,849 --> 00:00:25,503 ♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor" ♪ 10 00:00:25,634 --> 00:00:26,769 ♪ I'm headin' on down to South Park ♪ 11 00:00:26,852 --> 00:00:28,854 ♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪ 12 00:00:32,162 --> 00:00:33,298 ♪ Come on down to South Park ♪ 13 00:00:33,381 --> 00:00:35,165 ♪ And meet some friends of mine ♪ 14 00:00:42,303 --> 00:00:44,957 OK, kids, let's take our seats. 15 00:00:45,088 --> 00:00:47,873 Before we get started, we have a guest speaker today. 16 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:51,529 Please give your undivided attention to Kipling. 17 00:00:51,660 --> 00:00:53,492 Thank you, sir. Hey. What's up, guys? 18 00:00:53,575 --> 00:00:54,663 My name's Kipling. 19 00:00:54,750 --> 00:00:56,364 I'm with the Webelos of America. 20 00:00:56,447 --> 00:00:58,580 I want to talk you guys about the exciting opportunity 21 00:00:58,710 --> 00:01:00,364 to join the Webelos. 22 00:01:00,495 --> 00:01:02,671 -Is that a chick or a dude? -Shut up. 23 00:01:02,758 --> 00:01:04,242 I'm sure some of you were in Scouts before. 24 00:01:04,325 --> 00:01:06,240 Webelos are an extension of Scouts, 25 00:01:06,370 --> 00:01:08,111 specifically for fifth and sixth graders. 26 00:01:08,198 --> 00:01:09,508 You guys, is that a chick or a dude? 27 00:01:09,591 --> 00:01:11,767 -It's a chick. -Nah, that's a dude, bro. 28 00:01:11,897 --> 00:01:13,512 ...part of it as well. 29 00:01:13,595 --> 00:01:15,336 Now, I know what y'all might be thinking... 30 00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:17,338 Webelos used to be only for boys. 31 00:01:17,468 --> 00:01:19,166 Well, now they also allow girls, 32 00:01:19,295 --> 00:01:21,694 and I myself, as a... 33 00:01:21,777 --> 00:01:23,387 Webelo, can tell you 34 00:01:23,518 --> 00:01:26,260 it's a great organization for everyone. 35 00:01:28,914 --> 00:01:30,529 I don't know, guys, I'm like 60% sure 36 00:01:30,612 --> 00:01:31,787 that was a fucking dude. 37 00:01:31,917 --> 00:01:33,397 I'm definitely betting it's a chick. 38 00:01:33,484 --> 00:01:34,616 What are the odds at? 39 00:01:34,746 --> 00:01:36,100 Looks like about 40 kids betting now, 40 00:01:36,183 --> 00:01:38,489 55% saying the Webelo is a dude. 41 00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:40,622 So I'd only win, like, five bucks on a $2 bet? 42 00:01:40,752 --> 00:01:42,062 What are you guys talking about? 43 00:01:42,145 --> 00:01:43,542 Prediction market app, dude. 44 00:01:43,625 --> 00:01:45,496 You know, online peer to peer betting. 45 00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:46,849 Yeah, it's social platform betting. 46 00:01:46,932 --> 00:01:47,981 People can make any bet they want, 47 00:01:48,064 --> 00:01:49,287 and then other users take them up on it. 48 00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:51,376 -Really? -Yeah, it's pretty sweet, dude. 49 00:01:51,459 --> 00:01:53,291 People bet on anything, even stuff here at the school. 50 00:01:53,374 --> 00:01:55,506 See? Will the girls' soccer team win on Friday? 51 00:01:55,593 --> 00:01:56,771 Will there be a snow day this month? 52 00:01:56,854 --> 00:01:58,209 Will Kyle's mom strike Gaza 53 00:01:58,292 --> 00:01:59,652 and destroy a Palestinian hospital? 54 00:01:59,771 --> 00:02:01,299 Will school lunch have tater tots next week? 55 00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:02,731 Wait, what was that? 56 00:02:02,818 --> 00:02:04,519 Will school lunch have tater tots next week? 57 00:02:04,602 --> 00:02:06,782 -No, the one about my mom! -Oh. Uh... 58 00:02:06,865 --> 00:02:08,301 Will Kyle's mom strike Gaza 59 00:02:08,431 --> 00:02:09,868 and destroy a Palestinian hospital? 60 00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:12,436 Why the hell would my mom destroy a Palestinian hospital? 61 00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:15,309 'Cause she's a Jew? 62 00:02:15,396 --> 00:02:17,267 Boys, put 'em away. 63 00:02:17,398 --> 00:02:19,752 You know the rules... no cell phones during school time. 64 00:02:19,835 --> 00:02:21,184 Sorry, Jesus. 65 00:02:22,664 --> 00:02:24,231 No phones, guys! 66 00:02:25,623 --> 00:02:27,803 Take that bet down right now, fat ass! 67 00:02:27,886 --> 00:02:29,105 I didn't put it up, Kyle. 68 00:02:29,192 --> 00:02:30,628 I'm not even betting on it. 69 00:02:30,759 --> 00:02:32,939 It's 9:1 odds your mom won't do it... those are terrible odds. 70 00:02:33,022 --> 00:02:34,415 This is such bullshit! 71 00:02:34,545 --> 00:02:35,768 I'm gonna find out who started this 72 00:02:35,851 --> 00:02:38,988 and I'm gonna fucking rip them a new asshole! 73 00:02:39,071 --> 00:02:42,035 Man, you just bring up Gaza to a Jew and they flip out. 74 00:02:42,118 --> 00:02:44,559 Maybe these are pretty good odds. 75 00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:50,391 You're watching Fox News! 76 00:02:50,474 --> 00:02:52,868 They're called prediction market apps... 77 00:02:52,998 --> 00:02:55,395 controversial online betting that's found a loophole 78 00:02:55,478 --> 00:02:57,525 around normal gambling laws. 79 00:02:57,655 --> 00:03:00,488 And, of course, the number one trending bet on the apps: 80 00:03:00,571 --> 00:03:04,358 Will President Trump and Satan's baby be a boy or a girl? 81 00:03:04,488 --> 00:03:06,055 That's right, prediction market apps 82 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,800 are going crazy right now. 83 00:03:07,883 --> 00:03:11,582 On Kalshi, 54% are betting it's gonna be a boy, 84 00:03:11,669 --> 00:03:14,933 while bettors on Polymarket are at nearly 60% 85 00:03:15,064 --> 00:03:18,198 the demonic butt baby's gonna be a girl. 86 00:03:27,468 --> 00:03:28,821 Hello, boss. 87 00:03:28,904 --> 00:03:31,824 Another gift for the baby. 88 00:03:31,907 --> 00:03:33,822 Another present for the baby? 89 00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:35,609 What about me? 90 00:03:35,692 --> 00:03:38,222 Everyone is so excited for the baby, boss. 91 00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:41,482 You must be so excited as well. 92 00:03:41,612 --> 00:03:43,353 Uh, yeah, sure. Real excited. 93 00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:47,836 It is going to completely change your life, though. 94 00:03:47,923 --> 00:03:48,841 What are you talking about? 95 00:03:48,924 --> 00:03:50,969 Well, when the baby comes, 96 00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:54,325 you will have to give it all your attention. 97 00:03:54,408 --> 00:03:57,062 No more dinner parties in the Rose Garden. 98 00:03:57,149 --> 00:04:00,501 No more baseball games. No more travelling. 99 00:04:00,631 --> 00:04:03,634 No more long nights at Mar-a-Iago. 100 00:04:06,811 --> 00:04:07,856 Oh. 101 00:04:07,986 --> 00:04:09,336 Ooh. 102 00:04:10,902 --> 00:04:13,126 Hey, Satan! 103 00:04:13,209 --> 00:04:16,386 You wanna get in the hot tub and smoke some cigarettes? 104 00:04:16,517 --> 00:04:19,654 Hot tubs and cigarettes are really bad for the baby. 105 00:04:19,737 --> 00:04:21,608 Yeah, I know. Let's do it anyway. 106 00:04:21,738 --> 00:04:24,355 Wait, do you want to get rid of the baby? 107 00:04:24,438 --> 00:04:26,270 I don't think your followers would be very happy 108 00:04:26,353 --> 00:04:28,707 if we got an abortion. 109 00:04:28,790 --> 00:04:30,926 Hey, relax, guy! 110 00:04:31,009 --> 00:04:32,885 I don't want to get rid of the baby. 111 00:04:32,968 --> 00:04:34,709 Good, 'cause we're not going to. 112 00:04:34,839 --> 00:04:36,450 Great! 113 00:04:41,890 --> 00:04:43,021 Jimmy! 114 00:04:43,108 --> 00:04:44,026 Oh, hey, Kyle. 115 00:04:44,109 --> 00:04:45,724 What the hell is this? 116 00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:47,813 That's a prediction market app. 117 00:04:47,896 --> 00:04:51,469 I'm asking why did you bet yes that my mom would strike Gaza? 118 00:04:51,552 --> 00:04:52,861 Oh, yeah, I put some money on that. 119 00:04:52,944 --> 00:04:54,733 I know it's not very likely, but I like to bet on 120 00:04:54,816 --> 00:04:56,687 l-long shots. 121 00:04:56,774 --> 00:04:58,472 Why are you betting on it at all? 122 00:04:58,602 --> 00:05:00,561 Israel and Gaza is a very serious matter. 123 00:05:00,691 --> 00:05:02,040 Oh, I know, Kyle. 124 00:05:02,171 --> 00:05:03,698 I told a joke about Gaza on a Zoom meeting yesterday 125 00:05:03,781 --> 00:05:04,913 and nobody laughed. 126 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,045 I guess it's not even remotely funny. 127 00:05:08,525 --> 00:05:10,397 Wow. What a terrific audience. 128 00:05:10,527 --> 00:05:11,967 What is wrong with you people? 129 00:05:12,050 --> 00:05:13,621 Do you even know what Gaza is? 130 00:05:13,704 --> 00:05:15,536 Do you seriously just care about making a couple bucks? 131 00:05:15,619 --> 00:05:17,364 You know what my mom would do if she found out about this? 132 00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:19,144 She would absolutely lose her shit! 133 00:05:19,231 --> 00:05:21,582 There's been a conflict in Israel for thousands of years, 134 00:05:21,669 --> 00:05:23,627 and Jews and Palestinians are not football teams 135 00:05:23,758 --> 00:05:24,715 that you bet on. 136 00:05:24,802 --> 00:05:26,282 Guys, phones. 137 00:05:26,369 --> 00:05:28,593 Sorry, Jesus. 138 00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:30,242 Kyle, if you think the bet isn't fair, 139 00:05:30,373 --> 00:05:31,335 then you can just take it up with the company 140 00:05:31,418 --> 00:05:33,071 that manages the app. -I can? 141 00:05:33,158 --> 00:05:34,595 Sure thing. 142 00:05:34,682 --> 00:05:36,814 These apps aren't r-run of the mill, rinkydink. 143 00:05:36,945 --> 00:05:38,298 They're all run by highly professional 144 00:05:38,381 --> 00:05:41,297 strategic advisors. 145 00:05:55,224 --> 00:05:57,404 Hello? 146 00:05:57,487 --> 00:06:01,883 Yeah, is this the "Strategic Advisor for Predictive Markets?" 147 00:06:02,013 --> 00:06:04,276 Yes, it is. 148 00:06:04,407 --> 00:06:05,760 Well, there's a bet on one of your apps 149 00:06:05,843 --> 00:06:06,979 that's incredible insensitive, 150 00:06:07,062 --> 00:06:09,107 and it needs to be taken down now! 151 00:06:10,979 --> 00:06:14,852 Oh, uh, all our bets are actually regulated by the CFTC. 152 00:06:14,983 --> 00:06:16,771 You need to talk to them. 153 00:06:16,854 --> 00:06:18,987 What's the CFTC? 154 00:06:19,074 --> 00:06:22,338 It's the Commodity Futures Trading Commission. 155 00:06:22,425 --> 00:06:24,126 It's the federal government. 156 00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:27,256 They have to approve all bets and deal with discrepancies. 157 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,567 Fine! I'll call the CFTC then. 158 00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:31,003 So stupid. 159 00:06:31,086 --> 00:06:33,086 Commodity Futures Trading Commission... here we go. 160 00:06:41,836 --> 00:06:44,451 Hello? 161 00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,235 Yeah, I'm calling about a prediction market bet 162 00:06:46,318 --> 00:06:47,929 that's offensive to Jewish people. 163 00:06:48,058 --> 00:06:50,453 Ooh, that sounds really bad. 164 00:06:50,540 --> 00:06:53,717 If it's offensive, you probably need to speak with the FCC. 165 00:06:53,848 --> 00:06:55,545 The FCC? 166 00:06:55,676 --> 00:06:57,916 Yeah, they're dealing with all the offensive stuff now. 167 00:06:58,026 --> 00:07:00,071 Here, let me connect you. 168 00:07:10,038 --> 00:07:12,087 Hello? 169 00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:14,046 This is the same fucking guy! 170 00:07:14,129 --> 00:07:16,091 -Who is it? -Uh, apparently, 171 00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:18,311 there's a really offensive bet on an app 172 00:07:18,394 --> 00:07:20,483 that the government is sort of in charge of, 173 00:07:20,570 --> 00:07:22,398 and I'm like the strategic advisor. 174 00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:24,269 An offensive government app? 175 00:07:24,356 --> 00:07:26,620 I better go speak with the president right away. 176 00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:45,856 Hey, Satan! 177 00:07:47,989 --> 00:07:49,947 Hey, Satan! 178 00:07:50,078 --> 00:07:51,906 Can you come downstairs? 179 00:07:54,299 --> 00:07:55,870 What do you want? 180 00:07:55,953 --> 00:07:57,738 Just come down the stairs real quick. 181 00:07:57,868 --> 00:07:59,087 For what? 182 00:07:59,174 --> 00:08:00,610 For just real quick. 183 00:08:00,741 --> 00:08:02,220 Oh, there you are, Mr. President! 184 00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:03,574 I need to talk to you. 185 00:08:03,657 --> 00:08:05,354 No, no, no, no! Brendan Carr, don't... 186 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:08,313 Whoa! 187 00:08:12,230 --> 00:08:14,885 The FCC guy must have shitty ankles. 188 00:08:21,762 --> 00:08:23,594 You guys! You guys! 189 00:08:23,677 --> 00:08:25,073 Have you checked out the betting app lately? 190 00:08:25,156 --> 00:08:26,810 -No. -Ever since Kyle got 191 00:08:26,941 --> 00:08:28,337 all pissed off, the odds are going up 192 00:08:28,420 --> 00:08:29,948 on his mom attacking Gaza. 193 00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:31,819 -No way. -Yeah, check it out! 194 00:08:31,902 --> 00:08:34,168 Now 17% of people are betting she's gonna do it. 195 00:08:34,251 --> 00:08:36,211 We gotta get in on this, guys. 196 00:08:36,341 --> 00:08:38,391 Dude, Kyle's mom isn't going to strike Gaza. 197 00:08:38,474 --> 00:08:40,480 Yes, exactly. We know that. 198 00:08:40,563 --> 00:08:42,433 And we can also influence Kyle 199 00:08:42,565 --> 00:08:44,436 to get the odds raised even more. 200 00:08:44,567 --> 00:08:45,920 It's called a conflict of interest, you guys. 201 00:08:46,003 --> 00:08:47,182 It's a way to make free money. 202 00:08:47,265 --> 00:08:48,571 Isn't that illegal? 203 00:08:48,658 --> 00:08:50,098 Yes! All we have to do is make sure 204 00:08:50,181 --> 00:08:52,009 Kyle stays angry, 205 00:08:52,096 --> 00:08:53,841 and at the same time, go talk antisemitic shit about his mom 206 00:08:53,924 --> 00:08:55,364 to goose the odds up even more. 207 00:08:55,447 --> 00:08:56,975 What are you guys talking about? 208 00:08:57,058 --> 00:08:58,193 Nothing. Just talking about 209 00:08:58,276 --> 00:09:00,017 how messed up it is everyone hates Jews now. 210 00:09:00,104 --> 00:09:02,415 -You think it's messed up? -Yes, I do, Kyle. 211 00:09:02,498 --> 00:09:04,373 Why would an app allow a bet like that to exist? 212 00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:05,675 It's obvious race bait. 213 00:09:05,806 --> 00:09:07,808 Yeah, that's exactly how I feel! 214 00:09:07,895 --> 00:09:09,161 Dude, you might just want to let it go. 215 00:09:09,244 --> 00:09:10,811 See? "Just let it go." 216 00:09:10,898 --> 00:09:12,512 That's how people want you to deal with a crisis 217 00:09:12,595 --> 00:09:13,875 that they don't even understand. 218 00:09:13,988 --> 00:09:15,642 Yes! Thank you! 219 00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:17,295 You can't give up, Kyle. 220 00:09:17,426 --> 00:09:19,345 It's not cool people would say this stuff about your mom. 221 00:09:19,428 --> 00:09:21,952 And honestly, if you don't have her back, who will? 222 00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:29,050 Hey, have you guys heard about Kyle's mom? 223 00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:32,619 Man, that bitch has it out for Palestine, let me tell you. 224 00:09:32,702 --> 00:09:34,012 Well, I don't know, I would just hate to be 225 00:09:34,095 --> 00:09:36,097 a Palestinian hospital, that's all I can say. 226 00:09:36,227 --> 00:09:37,881 Well, anyway, good to talk to you guys. 227 00:09:38,012 --> 00:09:39,017 Hey, guys! Guys, have you heard about 228 00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:40,928 my friend Kyle's mom? 229 00:09:48,109 --> 00:09:50,546 Oh, my goodness, can you believe all the crazy apps 230 00:09:50,633 --> 00:09:52,287 our kids are on these days? 231 00:09:52,417 --> 00:09:54,685 Ugh! Who can keep track anymore? 232 00:09:54,768 --> 00:09:56,900 Kyle comes to me every day with a new app 233 00:09:57,031 --> 00:09:58,336 that he just has to have. 234 00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,821 I tell him, "That app costs money, Kyle. 235 00:10:00,904 --> 00:10:02,214 "Then it charges you money. 236 00:10:02,297 --> 00:10:03,824 Where you gonna get this money?" 237 00:10:03,907 --> 00:10:05,517 Yeah, you know what'd be nice? 238 00:10:05,648 --> 00:10:07,785 Is an app where you can actually make some money. 239 00:10:07,868 --> 00:10:08,829 Yes. 240 00:10:08,912 --> 00:10:10,305 That'd be great, wouldn't it? 241 00:10:10,435 --> 00:10:12,616 Yes, it certainly would. 242 00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:16,097 So, Sheila, 243 00:10:16,180 --> 00:10:20,358 how have you been feeling about the current situation in Gaza? 244 00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,449 -What? -Uh, yeah, 245 00:10:24,536 --> 00:10:27,017 just... just thought we'd sort of take your temperature. 246 00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:29,933 Which way are you thinking about going with that? 247 00:10:30,064 --> 00:10:32,022 Well, I think it's all horrible. 248 00:10:32,109 --> 00:10:35,199 A lot of people are dying. -Uh-huh. 249 00:10:35,330 --> 00:10:38,594 And do you feel like you need to do anything about it? 250 00:10:38,681 --> 00:10:40,687 What would I do about it? 251 00:10:40,770 --> 00:10:42,554 I mean, probably nothing, right? 252 00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:44,735 You're going to do nothing about it. 253 00:10:44,818 --> 00:10:47,472 Are you implying the Jews in America 254 00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:49,914 have some kind of obligation to do something about it? 255 00:10:49,997 --> 00:10:52,695 -Whoa, whoa! -You want to vilify my faith! 256 00:10:52,782 --> 00:10:54,349 Is that it? -Sheila, it's OK. 257 00:10:54,479 --> 00:10:56,481 It's not Jews versus Palestine! 258 00:10:56,568 --> 00:10:58,487 It's Israel versus Palestine! 259 00:10:58,570 --> 00:11:00,315 Here we go with the Palestinian stuff again. 260 00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:01,922 And maybe if you read books 261 00:11:02,009 --> 00:11:04,102 instead of everything Hollywood actors say, 262 00:11:04,185 --> 00:11:06,491 you'd know the difference! 263 00:11:09,146 --> 00:11:10,586 What are you putting your money on? 264 00:11:10,713 --> 00:11:14,412 I mean, it's a ridiculous bet, but she seems pretty pissed off. 265 00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:17,115 There's really no money to be made on betting she won't. 266 00:11:17,198 --> 00:11:18,852 Yeah, let's take the long odds. 267 00:11:18,939 --> 00:11:20,549 That makes these apps more fun. 268 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:21,467 -Yeah. -Yeah. 269 00:11:57,804 --> 00:12:00,589 Hey, Satan! 270 00:12:02,678 --> 00:12:04,375 I made you some soup! 271 00:12:06,029 --> 00:12:10,168 I don't like carrots. 272 00:12:10,251 --> 00:12:12,387 Hey, relax, guy! 273 00:12:12,470 --> 00:12:13,820 Carrots are good for you. 274 00:12:13,950 --> 00:12:16,039 I don't want carrots. 275 00:12:16,170 --> 00:12:18,650 I ordered cheesecake on DoorDash. 276 00:12:18,781 --> 00:12:21,044 Mr. President, I really need to speak with you. 277 00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:22,397 Not now, Brendan Carr! 278 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:23,873 Satan won't eat his carrots. 279 00:12:24,004 --> 00:12:26,006 Oh, come on, Satan, you're eating for two now. 280 00:12:26,136 --> 00:12:27,707 Carrots are good for you, see? 281 00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:30,227 Ah, Brendan Carr, don't do it! 282 00:12:30,358 --> 00:12:32,712 Whoa, this is the best soup ever. I... 283 00:12:34,536 --> 00:12:35,541 Oh, God! 284 00:12:36,843 --> 00:12:37,935 Whoa! 285 00:12:38,018 --> 00:12:39,846 Whoo! Whoo-hoo-hoo! 286 00:12:44,241 --> 00:12:46,417 Wow-wow-wow-wow! 287 00:12:50,247 --> 00:12:52,946 Those carrots must have been from Erewhon. 288 00:12:55,905 --> 00:12:57,563 Everywhere I went today, 289 00:12:57,646 --> 00:12:59,169 it was the same thing. 290 00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:01,436 What are you going to do about Gaza? 291 00:13:01,519 --> 00:13:03,739 Like us Jews in America have any control 292 00:13:03,870 --> 00:13:05,440 over what's going on in Israel. 293 00:13:05,523 --> 00:13:07,399 Why is everyone suddenly confronting us 294 00:13:07,482 --> 00:13:09,096 about the politics? 295 00:13:09,179 --> 00:13:12,835 Have people been asking what you think about Gaza, Gerald? 296 00:13:12,922 --> 00:13:14,881 No, for some reason, they were just asking 297 00:13:15,011 --> 00:13:17,057 what you think about it. -You see? 298 00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,324 It's just pure antisemitism! 299 00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:22,457 I'm so sick of being grilled about my views on Palestine 300 00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:24,111 and my thoughts on Hamas! 301 00:13:24,194 --> 00:13:26,679 And being judged for things that are centuries old 302 00:13:26,762 --> 00:13:29,247 and that non-Jews know nothing about! 303 00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:30,639 Well, if they all think we should do something... 304 00:13:30,722 --> 00:13:31,553 You... stop! SHEILA: Then you better believe 305 00:13:31,636 --> 00:13:33,425 I'll do something! 306 00:13:33,508 --> 00:13:35,470 You know, Mom, I'm starting to think that us Jews 307 00:13:35,553 --> 00:13:36,950 should just lay low for a little bit. 308 00:13:37,033 --> 00:13:40,297 There! Now my son is complacent. 309 00:13:40,384 --> 00:13:42,608 This is one Jewish household that will not put up with it 310 00:13:42,691 --> 00:13:44,301 anymore! -Ma, please. 311 00:13:44,432 --> 00:13:45,563 Don't make things any worse. 312 00:13:45,694 --> 00:13:48,740 Worse? How can it be any worse? 313 00:13:48,871 --> 00:13:51,269 I'm going to find out where all this is coming from, 314 00:13:51,352 --> 00:13:54,659 and I'm going to give them a piece of my mind! 315 00:13:56,096 --> 00:13:57,880 No! Ma! 316 00:14:04,321 --> 00:14:06,588 Look, boss, another present for the baby! 317 00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:10,937 Another present for the baby? Right! 318 00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:12,507 Isn't it cute, boss? 319 00:14:12,590 --> 00:14:14,248 We must be careful, though, 320 00:14:14,331 --> 00:14:17,682 cats can be very harmful to a pregnancy. 321 00:14:17,813 --> 00:14:19,902 Harmful to a pregnancy? 322 00:14:19,989 --> 00:14:23,688 Well, yes, boss, it's a parasite called toxoplasmosis. 323 00:14:23,775 --> 00:14:25,956 It can be transferred from cats to humans 324 00:14:26,039 --> 00:14:27,692 and bring about some complications. 325 00:14:29,564 --> 00:14:32,480 Toxoplasmosis? 326 00:14:55,372 --> 00:14:58,506 Hey, Satan! 327 00:15:00,987 --> 00:15:04,773 Hey, Satan, you gotta come see this, it's really great. 328 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:06,644 What? 329 00:15:06,775 --> 00:15:09,303 Ay! I thought you were napping in our room. 330 00:15:09,386 --> 00:15:11,740 No, I had to go get the ultrasound. 331 00:15:11,823 --> 00:15:13,742 I can't believe you didn't show up. 332 00:15:13,825 --> 00:15:16,611 It really makes me feel like you don't care about this baby. 333 00:15:16,741 --> 00:15:20,745 Hey, relax, guy, of course I care about the baby. 334 00:15:20,832 --> 00:15:22,708 Mr. President, I'm feeling much better... 335 00:15:22,791 --> 00:15:25,185 No! Fuck! Brendan Carr! 336 00:15:41,766 --> 00:15:44,556 You guys. You guys, I did it. 337 00:15:44,639 --> 00:15:45,857 You did what? 338 00:15:45,988 --> 00:15:47,559 I talked so much shit about the Jews 339 00:15:47,642 --> 00:15:49,953 that I got the odds on the bet up to 95%. 340 00:15:51,037 --> 00:15:52,255 Yeah, check it out. 341 00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,131 I put 1,400 bucks on it last night. 342 00:15:54,214 --> 00:15:55,567 I am locked in. 343 00:15:55,650 --> 00:15:57,047 Where'd you get 1,400 bucks? 344 00:15:57,130 --> 00:15:58,570 I just took my mom's debit card, 345 00:15:58,653 --> 00:16:00,006 entered all the info into the betting app, 346 00:16:00,089 --> 00:16:01,612 and put all the money she has on it. 347 00:16:03,005 --> 00:16:04,489 Isn't she gonna be pissed off? 348 00:16:04,572 --> 00:16:07,488 Yeah, not when I turn her 1,400 bucks into 14,000. 349 00:16:07,618 --> 00:16:09,229 This is the safest investment ever. 350 00:16:09,359 --> 00:16:10,795 Nothing can possibly go wrong. 351 00:16:10,882 --> 00:16:12,797 Hey, fellas. Fellas! 352 00:16:12,884 --> 00:16:14,234 Fellas, have you seen the news? 353 00:16:14,364 --> 00:16:16,018 Kyle's mom's in Israel. 354 00:16:17,846 --> 00:16:19,156 -Really? -Oh, wow! 355 00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:20,414 I just put money down! 356 00:16:41,261 --> 00:16:43,006 Dude, your mom's in Israel. 357 00:16:43,089 --> 00:16:44,307 I know. 358 00:16:44,438 --> 00:16:45,308 Well, you gotta call her. 359 00:16:45,439 --> 00:16:46,483 You gotta calm her down. 360 00:16:46,614 --> 00:16:48,050 I've been trying to call her. 361 00:16:48,137 --> 00:16:49,497 Her phone's not working over there. 362 00:16:49,617 --> 00:16:51,405 Kyle this is no time for weakness. 363 00:16:51,488 --> 00:16:52,924 Whatever your mom is doing, 364 00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:56,236 it is going to make kids here even more anti-Semitic. 365 00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:57,407 You're totally right. 366 00:16:57,494 --> 00:16:58,756 Damn right, I'm right! 367 00:16:58,887 --> 00:17:00,066 You have to get a hold of your mom 368 00:17:00,149 --> 00:17:01,629 and tell her to calm down, Kyle. 369 00:17:01,716 --> 00:17:03,287 Call the Israeli government if you have to. 370 00:17:03,370 --> 00:17:05,071 How do I call the Israeli government? 371 00:17:05,154 --> 00:17:07,287 Call a diplomat. Call an embassy. 372 00:17:07,374 --> 00:17:10,467 You just have to talk to someone who works for Israel. 373 00:17:15,598 --> 00:17:17,297 Hello. 374 00:17:17,426 --> 00:17:19,303 Oh, you have got to be shitting me! 375 00:17:19,386 --> 00:17:20,869 -What? -This is the strategic advisor 376 00:17:20,952 --> 00:17:22,436 for predictive market apps. 377 00:17:22,519 --> 00:17:23,524 Tell him to take the bet down. 378 00:17:23,607 --> 00:17:24,868 What? 379 00:17:24,955 --> 00:17:26,049 Make him take the bet down, Kyle. 380 00:17:26,132 --> 00:17:27,006 It is anti-Semitic, and you have to fight 381 00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:29,309 for what you believe in. 382 00:17:29,396 --> 00:17:31,006 I called before about an offensive bet, 383 00:17:31,137 --> 00:17:32,446 and I want that bet taken down right now! 384 00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:33,661 That's right! 385 00:17:33,748 --> 00:17:35,445 Oh, yes, I believe your complaint 386 00:17:35,532 --> 00:17:38,187 was being reviewed by head of the FCC. 387 00:17:38,318 --> 00:17:39,932 Well, then what's the head of the FCC doing? 388 00:17:40,015 --> 00:17:41,364 Where the hell is he? 389 00:17:49,198 --> 00:17:52,462 Mr. Carr? Mr. Carr, can you hear me? 390 00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:58,037 We understand you're the head of the FCC, is that correct? 391 00:17:58,120 --> 00:17:59,774 Mm-hmm. 392 00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:01,341 All right, well, I'm very sorry, 393 00:18:01,428 --> 00:18:03,477 but you do appear to have toxoplasmosis 394 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:06,089 from exposure to cat feces. 395 00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:08,178 Aww! 396 00:18:08,261 --> 00:18:12,395 We need you to get some rest. Try not to move. 397 00:18:12,526 --> 00:18:15,833 Will the head of the FCC be OK, Doctor? 398 00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:17,139 His bones are healing, 399 00:18:17,226 --> 00:18:19,359 so he may regain full range of motion. 400 00:18:19,446 --> 00:18:23,798 But if the toxoplasmosis parasite gets to his brain... 401 00:18:23,928 --> 00:18:26,148 I'm afraid he may lose his freedom of speech. 402 00:18:26,279 --> 00:18:28,846 Oh, no! 403 00:18:28,977 --> 00:18:31,110 We'll do everything we can. 404 00:18:39,292 --> 00:18:43,557 Mr. Carr, why do you keep meddling in my plans? 405 00:18:43,687 --> 00:18:44,953 Huh? 406 00:18:45,036 --> 00:18:46,864 I've been trying to convince the boss 407 00:18:46,995 --> 00:18:50,568 to get rid of the baby. 408 00:18:50,651 --> 00:18:53,088 I am next in line to be president. 409 00:18:53,175 --> 00:18:55,225 That baby cannot be born. 410 00:18:55,308 --> 00:18:58,010 And if you continue to interfere, 411 00:18:58,093 --> 00:19:00,882 I will make things very difficult for you. 412 00:19:04,186 --> 00:19:06,667 We can do this the easy way, 413 00:19:06,797 --> 00:19:09,152 or we can do it the hard way. 414 00:19:22,770 --> 00:19:24,428 Hello. 415 00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:27,170 Uh, yes, is this the office of the president? 416 00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:28,780 Yes, it is. 417 00:19:28,863 --> 00:19:30,691 I've got a young man who's saying one of our 418 00:19:30,821 --> 00:19:33,476 predictive market bets is offensive to Jews? 419 00:19:33,607 --> 00:19:35,395 Ooh, that sounds bad. 420 00:19:35,478 --> 00:19:37,132 Yeah, it sounds pretty bad. 421 00:19:37,263 --> 00:19:38,572 Well, the president isn't here, 422 00:19:38,655 --> 00:19:40,353 but I'm, like, a special advisor, 423 00:19:40,483 --> 00:19:42,703 so I can probably get the bet taken down. 424 00:19:42,833 --> 00:19:45,227 Ooh, I'm a special advisor too! 425 00:19:45,358 --> 00:19:46,924 Oh, really? That's great. 426 00:19:47,055 --> 00:19:49,148 Can you email me the bet in question? 427 00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:50,845 Yeah, I'm emailing it now. 428 00:19:50,928 --> 00:19:52,238 Oh, yeah, I see it. 429 00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:54,584 OK, I'll need to approve with the financial company 430 00:19:54,715 --> 00:19:57,500 backing all the app since the bet money needs to be returned. 431 00:19:57,631 --> 00:20:00,416 OK, thanks, I'll let all the Jews know. 432 00:20:05,029 --> 00:20:07,162 What the hell? 433 00:20:07,249 --> 00:20:08,598 They took it down. 434 00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:13,168 We were all gonna win, and they took down our bets. 435 00:20:13,299 --> 00:20:14,952 How can the app company do that? 436 00:20:15,083 --> 00:20:16,654 I got in at nine-to-one odds. 437 00:20:16,737 --> 00:20:18,608 This is b-b-bullshit! 438 00:20:18,695 --> 00:20:20,484 Yeah, these apps are totally corrupt. 439 00:20:20,567 --> 00:20:24,227 Guys! For the love of God! 440 00:20:27,182 --> 00:20:30,885 Well, Cartman, I just wanna say thanks. 441 00:20:30,968 --> 00:20:33,279 You know, it's crazy, but nobody else here 442 00:20:33,362 --> 00:20:36,060 gave a crap about how I was feeling except for you. 443 00:20:36,147 --> 00:20:37,758 Oh, that's all right, Kyle. 444 00:20:37,888 --> 00:20:40,195 I'm just happy the bet got taken down. 445 00:20:40,326 --> 00:20:41,849 Now none of these sickos can profit 446 00:20:41,936 --> 00:20:43,416 off of what your mom does. 447 00:20:43,503 --> 00:20:44,721 Yeah, well, those people 448 00:20:44,852 --> 00:20:48,203 would have all lost the bet anyway. 449 00:20:48,334 --> 00:20:50,078 What do you mean they would have all lost the bet? 450 00:20:50,161 --> 00:20:53,948 Well, I know the reason my mom went Israel. 451 00:20:54,078 --> 00:20:56,128 It wasn't to bomb a Palestinian hospital? 452 00:20:56,211 --> 00:20:57,560 No, when my mom left the house, 453 00:20:57,691 --> 00:20:58,696 she said she was gonna find 454 00:20:58,779 --> 00:21:00,045 the person responsible for all this 455 00:21:00,128 --> 00:21:01,825 and give them a piece of her mind. 456 00:21:11,574 --> 00:21:12,358 You are not going 457 00:21:12,488 --> 00:21:13,885 to talk to me like that! 458 00:21:13,968 --> 00:21:15,539 I am extremely upset, 459 00:21:15,622 --> 00:21:19,151 and I am not leaving until I have said my piece! 460 00:21:19,234 --> 00:21:22,803 There you are, Mr. Netanyahu! 461 00:21:22,933 --> 00:21:24,761 Just who do you think you are, 462 00:21:24,892 --> 00:21:27,242 killing thousands and flattening neighborhoods, 463 00:21:27,373 --> 00:21:28,943 then wrapping yourself in Judaism 464 00:21:29,026 --> 00:21:31,420 like it's some shield from criticism? 465 00:21:31,551 --> 00:21:33,553 You're making life for Jews miserable 466 00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:36,342 and life for American Jews impossible! 467 00:21:36,425 --> 00:21:38,601 Oh, don't you roll your eyes at me, mister. 468 00:21:38,732 --> 00:21:40,211 You know what you're doing, 469 00:21:40,342 --> 00:21:42,392 and you're doing it on purpose! 470 00:21:42,475 --> 00:21:44,215 Well, now you can just sit in that chair, 471 00:21:44,346 --> 00:21:46,479 'cause I'm not going anywhere, buster! 472 00:21:46,609 --> 00:21:48,568 I've been to every PTA meeting, 473 00:21:48,698 --> 00:21:50,138 every school board meeting, 474 00:21:50,221 --> 00:21:52,049 and I can go all day!