1
00:00:03,253 --> 00:00:06,506
* The Simpsons *
2
00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:05,397
D’oh!
3
00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:13,823
Worst couch gag ever.
4
00:01:13,907 --> 00:01:14,907
Mm.
5
00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:28,463
Why do we have to go
to the rec center?
6
00:01:28,546 --> 00:01:31,216
I want to play
with my friends.
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When you’re older, you’ll
miss these fun activities.
8
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,096
You’re older. Why don’t you do
these fun activities?
9
00:01:36,179 --> 00:01:37,847
Uh, ’cause no
one’s making me.
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00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:39,140
Bye-bye.
11
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:43,561
Welcome
to Shaolin Kung Fu.
12
00:01:43,645 --> 00:01:46,356
10,000 years of knowledge
will be passed along
13
00:01:46,439 --> 00:01:48,775
to those whose parents
have signed a permission slip.
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The rest of you
have just purchased
15
00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:52,237
very expensive pajamas.
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00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:55,865
Namaste.
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00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:58,076
Pardon me, Master,
18
00:01:58,159 --> 00:02:01,079
but what does a big fat wad
like you know about kung fu?
19
00:02:01,162 --> 00:02:03,998
Ah. Kung fu
is not about physique,
20
00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:07,043
but the channeling of
one’s energy or chi.
21
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If you doubt my skill,
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please feel free to
attack at my signal.
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My chi!
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00:02:28,606 --> 00:02:30,150
Do we have any more paints?
25
00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:32,819
My orange isn’t the orange
of that orange.
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00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:34,612
Just paint the damn fruit.
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00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,614
Lower your expectations, Lisa.
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Public program, public program.
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Mm-hmm.
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Mm… hmm.
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Stop! Stop!
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00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,624
Juliet, this
is terrible!
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Your art is
personal and wrong.
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I was painting with my heart,
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00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:52,547
and if you look carefully,
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00:02:52,630 --> 00:02:54,924
you can see
that the knight is Josh Groban,
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00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,759
our young century’s
greatest vocalist.
38
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Oh, another Grobanite!
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Um, excuse me,
40
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but I think her painting
is very imaginative.
41
00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:06,769
I suppose you’d like
to teach this class?
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Yes, I would.
43
00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:11,941
Class, everyone please stop
and admire Juliet’s painting.
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I do not need this!
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My family owns a gas station.
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If you two thoughtful
and creative girls
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don’t like the way I teach,
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there’s a world of fun outside.
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See ya!
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What are you staring at?!
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Everyone paint me 20 laps!
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Come on, fatty.
Keep up!
53
00:03:40,261 --> 00:03:41,804
So, how come I’ve never
seen you around
54
00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:43,431
the Janet L.
Munoz-Robbins
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Rec Center before?
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My father just took a position
at Springfield University.
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Are your parents
academics?
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Kind of.
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Let’s do some Groban.
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* Everybody… *
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00:03:58,738 --> 00:04:03,701
* Wants to be understood *
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* Well, I can hear you *
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00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:14,212
* Everybody… *
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* Wants *
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* To be loved… *
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* Don’t give up… *
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* Because you *
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* Are loved. *
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I need some candy for
a first playdate,
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but I don’t want
to come on too strong.
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00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:39,153
- M&M’S?
- Well, if I pick plain,
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00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:40,613
she’ll think I’m cheap,
73
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but if I pick peanut,
she may have an allergy.
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You just killed
her, Bart!
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How about Charleston Chew?
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00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:46,577
What is this,
Brooklyn in the ’50s?
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Don’t just say stuff.
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00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:50,581
You ask for my help,
then you don’t want it.
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00:04:50,665 --> 00:04:53,042
Excuse me, but why not
consider an Almond Joy?
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00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:56,004
It looks like you only brought
something for yourself,
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but then you just happen
to have two pieces.
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Finally, a real
suggestion!
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If she doesn’t like coconut,
you’re screwed!
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00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:04,971
Mm…
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Oh.
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00:05:13,438 --> 00:05:15,648
Hi, Juliet.
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00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:17,400
So, what do you want to do?
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I don’t know. It’s been so long
since I’ve had a playdate.
89
00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:22,697
Not that I couldn’t get
one if I wanted. I…
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My parents bought me
a membership card
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to the Folk Art Museum.
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00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:27,827
Does it get you into
special exhibits?
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On Wednesdays.
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That’s today!
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Folk Art!
96
00:06:00,276 --> 00:06:03,905
So Lisa asked if her new friend
could stay for dinner.
97
00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:07,450
She’s finally doing something
the book said she would.
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Won’t last.
99
00:06:14,332 --> 00:06:15,875
Hey, Mom,
can Juliet sleep over?
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00:06:15,958 --> 00:06:17,627
Are your parents
okay with that?
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00:06:17,710 --> 00:06:18,836
They never met us.
102
00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,421
We could be
murderers.
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00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:23,800
Could’ve been
if we hadn’t had kids.
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00:06:23,883 --> 00:06:25,093
Juliet’s father
is the world’s
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00:06:25,176 --> 00:06:27,136
foremost John Grisham scholar.
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00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:30,181
He found several
undiscovered plot
twists in The Client.
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00:06:30,264 --> 00:06:31,766
And he proved
that the real villain
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00:06:31,849 --> 00:06:33,976
in A Time to Kill
is the legal system itself.
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00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,353
Told you, Marge.
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Told… ja.
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00:06:39,565 --> 00:06:40,900
Now we need a name
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for our imaginary kingdom.
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I-I mean, queendom.
114
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How about… Equalia?
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Equalia.
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Where everyone is equal,
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but we’re in charge.
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I mean, somebody
has to be, right?
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Okay, you two,
lights out.
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00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:03,297
Lisa, do you want
to be best friends?
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00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:05,466
Gosh, this is all
happening so fast.
122
00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:07,260
I don’t know
what to say.
123
00:07:07,343 --> 00:07:08,803
Say yes! Say yes!
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I’d love to!
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Woo-hoo!
126
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:14,016
Good night, Lisa.
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00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:18,271
I have a best friend.
128
00:07:18,354 --> 00:07:19,647
You heard me say that,
didn’t you?
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00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:21,107
I did.
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00:07:21,190 --> 00:07:22,135
We’re still cool,
though, right?
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00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:23,234
We are.
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My best friend
is so cool.
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Mom, I’m meeting
Juliet after school.
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Great. Here are a few
best friend tips.
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00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,582
Compliment her hair
and shoes.
136
00:07:37,665 --> 00:07:41,169
If her dog bites you, don’t make
a big deal out of it and…
137
00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:42,837
Friendship is
like marriage.
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00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:44,422
The key is
listening.
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00:07:44,505 --> 00:07:47,800
Also, if her dog bites you,
don’t make a big deal out of it.
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I just said that.
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00:07:48,759 --> 00:07:50,553
Okay, honey.
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If it’s that important
to you, you said it.
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We’re at the end
of chapter four.
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00:07:56,058 --> 00:07:57,852
But we need a grabber,
a whammy,
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00:07:57,935 --> 00:07:59,520
a snap-a-roo,
some eye mustard.
146
00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:00,590
I got it!
147
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:02,356
How about this?
148
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,443
What if Queen Helvetica found
a rare two-horned unicorn?
149
00:08:05,526 --> 00:08:06,986
A two-nicorn!
150
00:08:07,069 --> 00:08:08,946
Oh. I love your accent.
151
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,698
Two-nicorn.
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00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:13,117
You are definitely
doing the book on tape.
153
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,874
And Queens Valedictoria
and Helvetica
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00:08:19,957 --> 00:08:23,377
hid their beloved two-nicorn
from the hungry ogre Homeroni.
155
00:08:27,423 --> 00:08:29,258
Girls are so lame.
156
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,010
Isn’t that right,
headless Darth Vader?
157
00:08:31,093 --> 00:08:32,303
What’s that?
158
00:08:32,386 --> 00:08:33,721
You miss your girlfriend,
159
00:08:33,804 --> 00:08:36,182
armless Malibu Stacey
wrapped in hockey tape? Mm.
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00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:43,940
Now remember,
Juliet’s family is very classy,
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00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:46,192
so be on
your best behavior.
162
00:08:46,275 --> 00:08:48,194
Use as many big
words as possible.
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00:08:48,277 --> 00:08:49,529
I call computer.
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00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:50,738
Bart, you can
have doorbell.
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Oh.
166
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Nice doorbell.
167
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Is it computerized?
168
00:08:58,120 --> 00:08:59,664
- Hey, that was…
- Oh!
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00:08:59,747 --> 00:09:00,831
Homer!
170
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:02,708
Uh, we… I…
171
00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:04,252
You come up
with an excuse!
172
00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:06,212
Ow!
173
00:09:06,295 --> 00:09:07,672
Homer, isn’t it wonderful
174
00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:10,299
that my Juliet and your Lisa
have become such fast friends?
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00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,468
If you say so, my lord.
176
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:13,719
Dinner’s ready.
177
00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:15,513
If you’ll show me
to your bathroom,
178
00:09:15,596 --> 00:09:17,640
I’d like to pretend
to wash my hands.
179
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:18,933
Ah, new friendship.
180
00:09:19,016 --> 00:09:20,810
So full of promise.
181
00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:24,564
Much like a young Mitch McDeere
in John Grisham’s The Firm.
182
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:26,774
When they make a movie
from his books,
183
00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:28,943
does he get one
or two free tickets?
184
00:09:29,026 --> 00:09:31,279
It depends
on the production company.
185
00:09:31,362 --> 00:09:34,073
"He had much to be happy about.
186
00:09:34,156 --> 00:09:36,450
A brilliant mind
and a solid body
187
00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:39,328
that did not gain weight
and needed little sleep."
188
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:41,497
Attention, everyone.
189
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:42,873
Lisa and I would like
190
00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:44,709
to perform a medley
of Josh Groban’s
191
00:09:44,792 --> 00:09:46,669
12 most popular downloads.
192
00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:48,462
Juliet, I’m worried
193
00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:51,716
this Josh Groban is becoming
a bit of an obsession for you.
194
00:09:51,799 --> 00:09:53,843
Let’s just listen
to James Horner’s soundtrack
195
00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:55,386
to The Pelican Brief,
shall we?
196
00:09:57,263 --> 00:09:59,640
Ah, track three…
"Researching the Brief."
197
00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:06,439
I hate track three!
198
00:10:06,522 --> 00:10:08,524
I hate it! I hate it!
199
00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:16,198
I’ll go get her.
200
00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:19,118
Hey, can you take a look
at a lump on my back?
201
00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:21,037
I’m not that
kind of doctor.
202
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,538
Oh, I get it.
203
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,540
Here’s ten bucks.
204
00:10:28,961 --> 00:10:30,463
That’s chewing gum.
205
00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:31,881
What a racket.
206
00:10:33,215 --> 00:10:35,176
Juliet, are you okay?
207
00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:36,594
I am now.
208
00:10:36,677 --> 00:10:38,220
Don’t you see them?
209
00:10:40,723 --> 00:10:41,724
See who?
210
00:10:41,807 --> 00:10:43,142
Our friends!
211
00:10:43,225 --> 00:10:45,519
The lords and ladies
of Equalia!
212
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:48,230
Juliet, you’re scaring me
just a little…
213
00:11:04,246 --> 00:11:06,540
Co-Queens Helvetica
and Valedictoria!
214
00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:08,918
We’re so glad
you’re finally here.
215
00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:10,336
I’m a giraffapuss.
216
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:13,089
I’m uncomfortable
in water and on land.
217
00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:19,762
A two-nicorn!
218
00:11:19,845 --> 00:11:21,514
Toss me a treat!
219
00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:28,062
I didn’t know
I could do that.
220
00:11:28,145 --> 00:11:31,065
And now, hit "shuffle"
on the royal myPod.
221
00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:39,115
* So she dances *
222
00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:41,617
* In and out of the crowd *
223
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:44,704
* Like a glance *
224
00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:51,502
* This romance is *
225
00:11:51,585 --> 00:11:53,921
* From afar calling me *
226
00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:58,926
* Silently… *
227
00:12:03,305 --> 00:12:06,142
These be mini pizzas
made from dragon eggs,
228
00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:07,476
Your Majesties.
229
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,894
Mom, please don’t do that.
230
00:12:08,978 --> 00:12:11,355
Who is this "Mom"
of which you speak?
231
00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:12,439
Mom, stop!
232
00:12:12,481 --> 00:12:14,150
This is our thing,
not yours!
233
00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:15,609
I’m just trying to…
234
00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:16,861
It’s better if you don’t.
235
00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:22,908
Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, we
need to talk about Lisa.
236
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:24,869
She’s unfocused,
scribbling nonsense,
237
00:12:24,952 --> 00:12:26,245
living in a world of her own.
238
00:12:27,788 --> 00:12:29,081
Well, that’s Bart for ya.
239
00:12:29,165 --> 00:12:31,292
We’re talking about
Lisa, your daughter.
240
00:12:31,375 --> 00:12:35,045
Seems like you and I
are always talking
about Bart, my son.
241
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:38,841
Lisa has been seeing an awful
lot of her new friend.
242
00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:41,844
Ah, yes, the one I’ve seen
on Lisa’s Facebook page.
243
00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:43,846
I search all the children’s
Facebook pages
244
00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:45,806
for unflattering references
to me.
245
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:48,768
By the way,
I enjoyed the photos
of your trip to Yosemite.
246
00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:50,603
Oh, that.
247
00:12:50,686 --> 00:12:53,606
We were actually just going out
for brunch and I got lost.
248
00:12:53,689 --> 00:12:55,065
But don’t worry, officer.
249
00:12:55,149 --> 00:12:56,942
We’ll definitely have a talk
with the boy.
250
00:12:58,194 --> 00:13:00,738
I can’t see Juliet anymore?!
251
00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:03,157
I thought you wanted me
to have a best friend.
252
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:06,577
There are limits to
how much two people
should be together.
253
00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:08,537
Well, you can’t keep Juliet
and me apart!
254
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:11,582
I’ll… I’ll disobey!
255
00:13:11,665 --> 00:13:13,626
I’m Bart Simpson’s
mother.
256
00:13:13,709 --> 00:13:16,796
You think you’ve got any
tricks I haven’t seen?
257
00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:26,472
Ooh!
258
00:13:26,555 --> 00:13:28,057
Bart Simpson,
age three.
259
00:13:32,561 --> 00:13:34,688
Bart Simpson, age ten.
260
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:47,576
Juliet!
261
00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:48,786
What are you
doing here?
262
00:13:48,869 --> 00:13:50,287
I’m running away
263
00:13:50,371 --> 00:13:51,455
and you’re coming
with me!
264
00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:52,957
I’d love to!
265
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,584
Oh, but I’m supposed to attend
the Model UN this weekend.
266
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,336
I’m the delegate
from Azerbaijan
267
00:13:57,419 --> 00:13:59,171
and I’m threatening
a rice tariff!
268
00:13:59,255 --> 00:14:01,966
Lisa, I know how important
the Model UN’s work is,
269
00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:04,510
but Equalia needs you.
270
00:14:04,593 --> 00:14:05,928
I need you.
271
00:14:08,806 --> 00:14:10,724
Okay… best friend.
272
00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:14,311
I remember when I was young
273
00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:17,314
and I ran off to a land
of equality.
274
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:26,865
Name.
275
00:14:26,907 --> 00:14:29,076
Dr. William MacDougal.
276
00:14:29,159 --> 00:14:30,828
From now on you’re
Groundskeeper Willie.
277
00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:32,872
Next!
278
00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:51,765
This is where
we’ll live.
279
00:14:51,849 --> 00:14:53,350
How did you find
this place?
280
00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:54,852
My family ate
here last week.
281
00:14:54,935 --> 00:14:56,353
It really went
downhill fast.
282
00:14:56,437 --> 00:14:58,355
But if you just believe,
283
00:14:58,439 --> 00:15:00,816
any place can be Equalia.
284
00:15:14,121 --> 00:15:16,457
Oh, no.
Clam-Elot’s is closed.
285
00:15:16,540 --> 00:15:18,083
Eh, I’m not
surprised.
286
00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:19,585
Their clam chowder
smelled like soap.
287
00:15:19,668 --> 00:15:20,668
Yeah.
288
00:15:22,546 --> 00:15:24,506
I wonder if Lisa
has threatened the Model UN
289
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,050
with her rice tariff yet.
290
00:15:26,133 --> 00:15:27,593
I doubt it…
291
00:15:27,676 --> 00:15:29,637
Friday is usually
just committee assignments
292
00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,764
and procedural rules.
293
00:15:32,973 --> 00:15:33,974
Mrs. Simpson!
294
00:15:34,058 --> 00:15:35,351
Oh, hiya, Martin.
295
00:15:35,434 --> 00:15:36,852
How’s the Model UN?
296
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,270
Total chaos.
297
00:15:38,354 --> 00:15:40,356
We’re two minutes away
from a roll call vote
298
00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:43,233
on a non-binding resolution
and no Azerbaijan.
299
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:47,780
Are you saying Lisa’s not there?
300
00:15:47,863 --> 00:15:51,158
To the extent you can trust
the word of a Belgian, yes.
301
00:15:51,241 --> 00:15:52,868
Lisa ran away,
302
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:54,495
and it’s all
my fault.
303
00:15:54,578 --> 00:15:57,873
If I’d just let her continue
her obsessive relationship
304
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,917
with that troubled little girl,
305
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:02,252
everything would’ve been fine.
306
00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:05,172
If I know my sister,
and unfortunately I do,
307
00:16:05,255 --> 00:16:07,967
she probably ran off to some
lame-o make-believe castle.
308
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:09,301
A castle?
309
00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:11,053
I know where they are.
310
00:16:11,136 --> 00:16:12,554
Wait.
311
00:16:14,014 --> 00:16:15,307
Is it some place
I’d have to put on a tie?
312
00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:16,850
No.
313
00:16:16,934 --> 00:16:18,143
Is it a place
I’d look overdressed
314
00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,228
if I did wear a tie?
315
00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:20,729
You probably would.
316
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,856
What about a jacket and jeans
with a nice T-shirt?
317
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:24,274
Just go.
318
00:16:33,701 --> 00:16:35,661
You know what I think
killed this place?
319
00:16:35,744 --> 00:16:36,912
No one wanted
to drive
320
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,372
to the middle of the
forest for clams.
321
00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:43,460
Let’s go get my
little girl.
322
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,048
My family’s here.
323
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:52,928
She’s not here?
324
00:16:57,725 --> 00:16:59,476
Girls in our hideout?
325
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:00,894
Now they’ll tell people
326
00:17:00,978 --> 00:17:03,272
where we go to stash
our stolen peaches.
327
00:17:03,355 --> 00:17:05,566
And to wait out
our bad haircuts.
328
00:17:05,649 --> 00:17:06,775
We’d better tie ’em up.
329
00:17:10,195 --> 00:17:12,197
This place is where we came
after my bar mitzvah.
330
00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:14,199
You said you weren’t
having one.
331
00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:15,451
Uh…
it was just family.
332
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:23,584
All these pictures
of seafood
333
00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:25,002
are making me hungry.
334
00:17:25,085 --> 00:17:26,336
We’ll get some cream
for the peaches
335
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:27,671
while you guard
the prisoners.
336
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:30,049
Don’t screw it up, butt-brain.
337
00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:32,718
At least my dad didn’t
smoke after his stroke.
338
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:36,180
Juliet, I’m scared.
339
00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:38,891
Shut your eyes and
you’ll be in Equalia.
340
00:17:38,974 --> 00:17:41,226
Equalia is not real.
341
00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,103
Maybe not, but it’s
better than this.
342
00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:46,064
Yeah.
343
00:17:47,858 --> 00:17:49,610
So the armies of the gnomes
and the elves
344
00:17:49,693 --> 00:17:53,697
faced off on either side of the
hollow, broad axes poised.
345
00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:55,324
With a fearsome cry,
346
00:17:55,407 --> 00:17:57,201
they raced towards the center
of the battlefield,
347
00:17:57,284 --> 00:17:59,411
banners aflutter in the breeze.
348
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:01,205
What comes next?
349
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:06,794
A battle to determine
the fate of Equalia.
350
00:18:06,877 --> 00:18:08,295
But you wouldn’t
be interested.
351
00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:10,089
I have a wide variety
of interests.
352
00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,632
Is there them dragon things?
353
00:18:11,715 --> 00:18:14,510
Isn’t that
a little clichéd?
354
00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:15,969
Yes. I mean, yes.
355
00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:17,971
There are dragons
everywhere.
356
00:18:18,055 --> 00:18:19,973
Green ones,
Chinese ones,
357
00:18:20,057 --> 00:18:21,975
chubby bald ones.
358
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:23,393
I like those ones.
359
00:18:23,477 --> 00:18:25,145
Tell me about those.
360
00:18:26,730 --> 00:18:28,732
And so the queens…
361
00:18:28,816 --> 00:18:30,192
And the Me-Dragon.
362
00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:32,611
…danced the minuet
of equality
363
00:18:32,694 --> 00:18:34,196
on a gossamer dewdrop.
364
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:35,364
Aw.
365
00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:38,575
Wha…?
366
00:18:38,659 --> 00:18:40,160
What’s going on here?
367
00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:41,495
What’s this?
368
00:18:41,578 --> 00:18:42,788
An ambitious
first novel
369
00:18:42,871 --> 00:18:44,414
by the two brightest
young writers
370
00:18:44,498 --> 00:18:46,667
this side of the Iowa
Writers Workshop.
371
00:18:46,750 --> 00:18:49,128
I bet it’ll
burn up good.
372
00:18:57,678 --> 00:19:00,722
Put the book down.
373
00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:03,183
Why should we,
butt-brain?
374
00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:06,270
For Equalia!
375
00:19:06,353 --> 00:19:09,648
* I am not a hero *
376
00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:13,902
* I am not an angel *
377
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:18,991
* I am just the man *
378
00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:22,786
* Man who’s trying
to love her… *
379
00:19:22,870 --> 00:19:25,122
Well, it looks
like we’re safe.
380
00:19:25,205 --> 00:19:26,540
Looks like.
381
00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:30,085
Juliet, I don’t want to go
to Equalia anymore.
382
00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:31,461
What do you mean?
383
00:19:31,545 --> 00:19:32,921
It’s a special place,
384
00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,923
but I need to live
in the real world.
385
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,967
The real world?
386
00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:38,969
The real world
is for people
387
00:19:39,052 --> 00:19:40,721
who can’t imagine
anything better.
388
00:19:40,804 --> 00:19:42,723
Good-bye, Lisa.
389
00:19:43,932 --> 00:19:46,185
Good-bye, Juliet.
390
00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:49,188
Cuckoo.
391
00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:53,025
"We have received
your manuscript
392
00:19:53,108 --> 00:19:54,860
The Chronicles of Equalia."
393
00:19:54,943 --> 00:19:56,778
Sounds promising
so far.
394
00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:58,405
"Unfortunately,
395
00:19:58,488 --> 00:20:01,200
it is not what we’re looking
for at this time.
396
00:20:01,283 --> 00:20:02,993
Thank you for thinking of us."
397
00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:05,412
Re-jected.
398
00:20:05,495 --> 00:20:08,874
You got a letter all the way
from New York City,
399
00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:10,918
and that’s something.
400
00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:12,753
And you know
what else, sweetie?
401
00:20:12,836 --> 00:20:15,297
You and your friend,
Princess Nutjob,
402
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:17,883
inspired me to write
my own fantasy novel,
403
00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:21,303
based on my experiences
as a dad.
404
00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:27,184
Okay, chapter one,
405
00:20:27,267 --> 00:20:30,771
uh…
406
00:20:30,854 --> 00:20:32,272
Oh.
407
00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:33,857
Writing is hard.
408
00:20:36,443 --> 00:20:39,738
Ladies and gentlemen,
Fall Out Boy.
409
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:44,660
Captioned by VISUAL DATA
410
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:27,286
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