1
00:00:03,045 --> 00:00:06,256
* The Simpsons *
2
00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:15,891
Games, games, games, games,
games, games, games, games!
3
00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:20,145
- Mmm. Normals?
- Two-eyes?
4
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:21,605
In-casts?
5
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:24,066
Why does a game store feel like detention?
6
00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:28,779
Modern board games aren't about fun.
They're about economics and math.
7
00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:30,280
You know, fun!
8
00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:32,824
Whoo-hoo!
9
00:00:32,908 --> 00:00:35,661
Bartholomew! A little help, please!
10
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:39,081
We've been epic-fantasy roleplaying
for six hours.
11
00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:44,086
If you'll sit in for me,
I need to fill the porcelain chalice.
12
00:00:44,169 --> 00:00:46,505
Only you could make peeing sound lame.
13
00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:48,215
How do I play this stupid game?
14
00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:53,178
You must role-play as my beloved
character, Dandelion Tenderjape.
15
00:00:53,262 --> 00:00:56,348
The bardic imp of the Feyrealm!
16
00:00:57,683 --> 00:00:59,851
- Hi.
- No pleasantries at table!
17
00:00:59,935 --> 00:01:01,520
"The party enters a cavern
18
00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:07,276
where, atop a glittering treasure mound,
sleeps the dragon Balfalmagog."
19
00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:09,570
Though I, Mythagoras the Bold,
20
00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:14,533
have vanquished every fire-drake
and lava wyrm in the Caverns of Hotness,
21
00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:19,288
this foe is far beyond any of you.
Retreat is what we should do.
22
00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:21,790
I attack!
23
00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:26,795
You idiot! You're gonna get us all killed!
24
00:01:26,878 --> 00:01:28,547
So long as I get Martin's guy killed.
25
00:01:28,630 --> 00:01:31,300
The party enters combat.
26
00:01:32,884 --> 00:01:35,679
The dragon breathes fire
at the defenseless lutist.
27
00:01:37,264 --> 00:01:39,558
Rolling to determine damage.
28
00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:50,068
Twenty-eight…
Twenty-eight points of fire damage!
29
00:01:51,153 --> 00:01:53,655
Hilarious.
30
00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:57,909
Without the help of his friends,
a-Dandelion will surely a-perish.
31
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:05,000
Mythagoras the Bold
leaves no companion behind!
32
00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:10,922
With the bravery of the derring-do
and the confident mannerism-free voice.
33
00:02:11,006 --> 00:02:14,092
Ah! Mythagoras is fighting a dragon.
34
00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:17,679
Everyone, freak out.
35
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,600
Ice Blast.
36
00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:23,518
Lightning Bolt.
37
00:02:23,602 --> 00:02:25,020
Sleep Apnea.
38
00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:33,362
In a final act of desperation,
the dragon lays Egg of Death.
39
00:02:35,781 --> 00:02:39,117
I'm fairly certain I can handle
one measly Death Egg.
40
00:02:39,201 --> 00:02:40,369
Likewise.
41
00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:52,089
One!
42
00:02:53,382 --> 00:02:57,678
Great Sheldon's ghost. It can't be. It…
Well, it's un-Frinkable.
43
00:02:57,761 --> 00:03:01,682
The lethal "eggsplosion"
pierces the wizard's defenses.
44
00:03:02,557 --> 00:03:06,228
And Mythagoras the Bold falls. He's dead.
45
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:10,190
I've been with Mythagoras for 20 years.
46
00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:12,609
He's my oldest friend.
47
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:18,949
- Why? Why? Why?
- Yoink.
48
00:03:23,787 --> 00:03:28,208
Bart, you got Frink's character killed!
You made a grown-up cry!
49
00:03:28,291 --> 00:03:31,294
Uh… Don't tell Mom about this, okay?
50
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:34,923
Oh, Bart, how could you
even think I wouldn't?
51
00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:38,343
You.
52
00:03:38,427 --> 00:03:40,178
Um, hello, Professor.
53
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:43,056
Bart's sister told me
he did something bad to you,
54
00:03:43,140 --> 00:03:47,352
but I don't understand what it was,
despite repeated explanations.
55
00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:50,105
Any-Anyway, apologize.
56
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:54,609
I'm sorry I pulled a Leeroy Jenkins
and got Mythagoras perma-deathed.
57
00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:58,530
Whoosh.
Well, we brought caramel clumpies.
58
00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:04,578
This place is the coolest.
59
00:04:06,204 --> 00:04:09,458
At least my heroic friend
died in battle.
60
00:04:09,541 --> 00:04:11,293
It's what he always wanted.
61
00:04:11,376 --> 00:04:12,878
So, you're not mad at me?
62
00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:17,966
Oh, powerful emotional responses
are just a spike in brain chemicals, lad.
63
00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:20,594
My brain prefers cogitation.
64
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:21,678
Sweet.
65
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:25,182
I'm so sorry
you lost your imaginary friend.
66
00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,476
How old are you again?
67
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:30,187
Ow! This slime just shocked me!
68
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:33,190
Oh, did it explain why? It is supposed to.
69
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:37,277
You see, as the mighty wizard,
I could be all the things that I am not.
70
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:40,030
I was, uh… Well, brave.
71
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,490
Mmm.
72
00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:43,158
Is this a shrink ray?
73
00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:45,786
Uh, yeah.
But it only works on watermelons.
74
00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:48,288
It sure does!
75
00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:51,917
As a mother, I've tried so hard
76
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:57,297
to channel my son's enthusiasms
in a positive direction.
77
00:04:57,380 --> 00:05:02,219
Science could be a wonderful outlet
for Bart's energy and imagination.
78
00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:03,804
Could he be your helper?
79
00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:08,975
Rambunctious child. Yes. Would you
accept the position of a lab assistant?
80
00:05:09,059 --> 00:05:12,437
Will I get to tangle with forces
I can't possibly understand
81
00:05:12,521 --> 00:05:14,314
and scream, "My God, what have I done?"
82
00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:16,274
At least once a day.
83
00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:17,526
I'm in.
84
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:23,073
* A weird friendship *
85
00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:29,871
* Unlikely pals
Two peas in a pod *
86
00:05:29,955 --> 00:05:32,457
* Improbable chums
And is it that hard? *
87
00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:33,750
* A weird friendship *
88
00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:38,088
* A weird friendship *
89
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:39,923
* Weird *
90
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:47,264
You know, in college, they're gonna try
to tell you that noble gases don't burn,
91
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,683
so don't mention today.
92
00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:52,519
Dude, I'm never going to college.
I'm dumb.
93
00:05:53,103 --> 00:05:57,315
"Dumb"? Well, that is the worst thing
you can call yourself. You take that back!
94
00:05:57,399 --> 00:06:01,862
What? I am dumb. It's fine.
Dumb guys can do lots of cool stuff.
95
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:04,030
It's always a dumb guy
who wins the lottery.
96
00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,198
You're not dumb.
97
00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:06,783
Everybody knows I am.
98
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:07,868
Oh, yeah? Well, I don't.
99
00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:10,120
- Am too. Am too. Am too.
- Are not. Are not.
100
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:12,789
Are not. Are not.
Are not, not, not, not, not.
101
00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:16,459
I would not be friends with you
if you were the D word.
102
00:06:20,130 --> 00:06:21,381
What is it?
103
00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:24,342
So when Bart said, "What is it,"
what did you say?
104
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:26,511
I said, "It's an invitation."
105
00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:31,641
Professor Frink's college reunion
is at some billionaire's private compound,
106
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,476
but he'll only go if I go with him.
107
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:35,228
Bart would be quite helpful.
108
00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:39,649
Social interaction can be, uh,
well, uh, tricky for me.
109
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:40,734
- What?
- No!
110
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,652
Mr. Personality?
111
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,488
The invitation does say family is welcome.
112
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,908
And as an impossibly literal person,
113
00:06:47,991 --> 00:06:50,827
I assume that means
that I can bring all of you.
114
00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:57,250
A rich guy super party.
Think of the food. Think of the booze.
115
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,089
Where exactly is this reunion?
116
00:07:03,173 --> 00:07:05,050
Well, they won't say where it is.
117
00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:07,010
These billionaires are so reclusive,
118
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,846
we have to sign an NDA
in order to find out.
119
00:07:11,681 --> 00:07:15,018
The Simpsons are going to.
120
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:25,862
Welcome to,
Professor Frink and unrelated family.
121
00:07:27,030 --> 00:07:32,619
This mansion is incredible.
It's like where a Realtor would live.
122
00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:35,372
Actually, that's just
where we store Christmas ornaments.
123
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,207
The mansion is behind the next rise.
124
00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:47,092
John, welcome to my humble abode.
125
00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:51,388
Well, not exactly humble,
and I only abode here four days a year,
126
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:52,931
and the actual owner is an offshore trust
127
00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:54,599
controlled by nominee directors,
but you know.
128
00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:58,978
Peter, how long has it been?
9.56 times ten to the third days?
129
00:07:59,062 --> 00:08:01,189
Oh, that was witty
and delivered rather calmly.
130
00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:03,066
This place is sweet.
131
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,360
I wouldn't mind
being hunted for sport here.
132
00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:08,947
I saw this view on a screen saver,
and I just had to have it.
133
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:11,616
The indigenous people who lived here
were none too happy.
134
00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:12,951
What happened to them?
135
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:16,871
Have you ever heard of eminent domain?
Because the tribal elders sure hadn't.
136
00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:20,375
Oh.
137
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:23,962
These are the worst people in the world.
138
00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:25,880
Don't think of them as people.
139
00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,216
Think of them as big piles of money
140
00:08:28,299 --> 00:08:33,054
with nothing better to do
than fund a smart little girl's education.
141
00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:37,183
You want me to try to squeeze
a scholarship out of a tech bro?
142
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:39,436
Don't I have a college fund?
143
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:43,231
We spent that
on long-term parking for this trip.
144
00:08:43,314 --> 00:08:46,484
These are just some of the trifles
I've collected over the years.
145
00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:50,989
There's a Komodo dragon,
nature's perfect tongue-flicking machine.
146
00:08:52,407 --> 00:08:57,120
This fossil here is the extinct creature
that a very famous video game is based on.
147
00:08:57,954 --> 00:09:01,332
Poor Frink.
How can he stand to be around Peter?
148
00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:03,668
That man took everything from him.
149
00:09:03,752 --> 00:09:06,337
What did Peter do to Frink?
150
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:08,131
This was back in college.
151
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:11,468
We were undergrads
in the early boom days of the Internet.
152
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:14,471
Together we created
the modern tech economy,
153
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:17,140
which seemed like
a good idea at the time.
154
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:20,393
John Frink was brilliant,
but unlike the rest of us,
155
00:09:20,477 --> 00:09:22,687
he never cared about making money.
156
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:26,399
Once he created something,
he just moved on to the next discovery.
157
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:32,322
Peter, I'd better get going
or I'll be late for Applied Email 202.
158
00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:34,324
My goodness, we've been playing that long?
159
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,326
Uh, Susan, uh, what time is it?
160
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:39,829
The current time is 57 degrees Fahrenheit.
161
00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:44,042
Susan is the voice-activated
assistant I created,
162
00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:46,711
but she never quite does
what you want her to do.
163
00:09:46,795 --> 00:09:49,255
Would you like to hear music
by a band you hate?
164
00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:52,550
John, you just leapfrogged
current technology by light years.
165
00:09:52,634 --> 00:09:54,719
Turning off lights for one year.
166
00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:58,556
Oh, she's worse than nothing.
167
00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,934
Now, if Susan is stressing you out,
168
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:04,354
I-I could toss it in the dumpster on
the way to my Ethics in Business seminar.
169
00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:07,357
You're always looking out for me,
always, trusted friend.
170
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:13,571
To this day, whenever a Siri or an Alexa
almost understands what you want,
171
00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:15,115
that's John's technology.
172
00:10:15,198 --> 00:10:17,951
But it was Peter who got rich off it.
173
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:20,578
What kind of billionaire
chooses money over friendship?
174
00:10:20,662 --> 00:10:22,664
Siri, what's a good revenge idea?
175
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:26,876
Revenge is a dish best served cold.
Here's some ice cream near you.
176
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,045
Oh, she's worse than nothing.
177
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,550
Say, how many of these
will get me unpleasantly drunk,
178
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:34,968
and may I have twice that many?
179
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:37,053
None of the drinks this weekend
will have alcohol.
180
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:39,222
Alcohol is a deadly poison.
181
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:42,308
And it's poison o'clock somewhere,
am I right?
182
00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:44,811
It will take years off your life.
183
00:10:44,894 --> 00:10:47,313
Yeah, all the crap ones at the end.
184
00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:50,066
Everyone here is dedicated
to radical life extension.
185
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:55,738
Did you know that in the very near future,
pseudoscience will literally solve aging?
186
00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:58,241
Do you mean our kids
will stay little forever?
187
00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:01,828
No, but they'll live
longer, healthier lives.
188
00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:05,999
This weekend we will only be consuming
189
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:09,752
the most cutting-edge plutoceuticals
and longevisyrups. Yum.
190
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,672
This tastes nothing like purple.
191
00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:16,718
Oh, that's olive oil and river clay.
It'll do wonders for your left testicle.
192
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:19,804
Speaking of life expectancy,
193
00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:22,807
did you know
that graduates of private universities
194
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:26,019
live longer than
their state college peers?
195
00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:29,689
Especially if they've gotten
full scholarships. Ha-ha.
196
00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:33,401
Sorry, I only listen to podcasts.
Could you talk at 2.5 times speed?
197
00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:35,069
Sure.
198
00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:36,279
My name is Lisa Simpson,
199
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:38,198
and an investment in me
is an investment in…
200
00:11:38,281 --> 00:11:40,491
- 2.7.
- …a more equitable, greener future.
201
00:11:40,575 --> 00:11:44,537
Pause and delete. Play Sam Harris.
202
00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:50,710
I can't wait to find out
how they screwed up the omelet bar.
203
00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:54,631
What do you want as your base?
Goat placenta or lab-grown goat placenta?
204
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,132
Half and half.
205
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:59,844
Homie, I know this life extension stuff
is a little wackadoodle,
206
00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:04,974
but if it worked, you and I could have
more time together than I ever dreamed of.
207
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:09,979
Happy 53rd birthday, my love.
208
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:14,442
These last 15 years
have been an unexpected miracle.
209
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:29,874
Okay, hair plugs. My wife wants me
to do whatever you say so I live forever.
210
00:12:29,958 --> 00:12:32,085
It all starts with a simple blood test.
211
00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:35,672
Follow my lead, and soon you'll have
the sex drive of an 18-year-old.
212
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,590
No, not again!
213
00:12:37,674 --> 00:12:40,635
Then the Egyptians said my yacht
was too big to fit through the canal,
214
00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:44,639
so I said, "Suez problem?
That's a 'you-ez' problem."
215
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:46,182
I'm so happy you came, John.
216
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:49,185
Oh, really?
Well, allow me to just verify that.
217
00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:51,187
Ah, confirmed.
218
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:54,274
These glasses
are a new technology of mine.
219
00:12:54,357 --> 00:12:57,193
I'm not the best at reading
other people's emotions.
220
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:59,362
These glasses do it for me.
221
00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,657
Well, I can see that you're impressed.
222
00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:03,908
They're amazing.
223
00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:07,412
Think what it could do
for the neurodivergent community
224
00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:09,872
or in a business negotiation
225
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:13,876
to always know
what the poor unsuspecting bastard
226
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,671
across the table is really feeling.
227
00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:20,174
I've never seen that emotion before.
228
00:13:20,258 --> 00:13:22,218
These may still need some tweaking.
229
00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:24,387
Could I take a closer look at them?
230
00:13:24,470 --> 00:13:26,973
Well, of course you can, trusted friend.
231
00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:32,729
Homer, it's incredible.
The blood tests we ran…
232
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:36,399
Somehow you had the biomarkers
of a 26-year-old.
233
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:38,484
- Him?
- He looks 60.
234
00:13:38,568 --> 00:13:39,986
He smells 80.
235
00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:42,739
But he must know something we don't!
236
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:46,492
Tell us your secrets.
Give us the keys to eternal life!
237
00:13:46,576 --> 00:13:48,619
Hmm? Hmm!
238
00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:53,249
The journey begins
as all journeys do, with beer.
239
00:13:53,332 --> 00:13:57,879
And I now own every beer in this country.
240
00:13:57,962 --> 00:14:01,758
And beam up some Doritos too,
or you're all dead by midnight.
241
00:14:03,384 --> 00:14:04,969
What an accomplishment.
242
00:14:05,053 --> 00:14:09,891
It's a wonder you found time
to file a patent for these.
243
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,100
Well, I didn't.
244
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:14,729
Didn't file a patent?
That's… That's so you.
245
00:14:15,354 --> 00:14:17,690
Are you nuts,
showing him your new invention?
246
00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:20,735
He stole your Susan idea
and made billions off it.
247
00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:24,238
Making money is for businessmen.
You and I are scientists.
248
00:14:24,322 --> 00:14:28,242
You should be a mad scientist.
You need to get angry at that jerk.
249
00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:31,579
As I said, powerful emotional responses
such as anger
250
00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:33,498
are just a spike in brain chemicals.
251
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:38,127
Oh, I suppose I-I could try.
252
00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:41,839
Peter never did thank me for his success.
That feels quite yucky.
253
00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:46,135
And he could have shared some of
his fortune with me, but he chose not to.
254
00:14:46,219 --> 00:14:49,388
Well, that makes the old glayvin
poipik right up, doesn't it?
255
00:14:49,472 --> 00:14:51,599
He-He took advantage of me.
256
00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:53,434
That's it, Professor! You're losing it!
257
00:14:53,518 --> 00:14:56,104
Now, what do I do with this…
with this rage?
258
00:14:56,187 --> 00:14:59,190
Meh, nothing.
It's just how you're supposed to feel.
259
00:14:59,273 --> 00:15:03,111
Why? Now my whole life
just feels like a cruel joke.
260
00:15:03,194 --> 00:15:04,529
At least you're done being a wimp.
261
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:08,199
"Wimp"? All this from the boy
who calls himself dumb
262
00:15:08,282 --> 00:15:10,618
- so he never has to try?
- What?
263
00:15:10,701 --> 00:15:12,745
You're afraid that if people knew
that you were smart,
264
00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:16,207
then you'd actually have to apply yourself
and you might fail.
265
00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:19,377
So it's much safer to call yourself dumb.
266
00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:22,213
How could you say that? I am dumb.
267
00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:25,925
Bad news, kid. You're smart,
and that's all you'll ever be.
268
00:15:33,057 --> 00:15:36,727
Who wants to live forever?
269
00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:41,899
We follow your path, teacher,
270
00:15:42,650 --> 00:15:46,529
but are you sure
that the secret to eternal youth
271
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:51,492
is shotgunning beer and watching
The Godzilla Channel until 3:00 a.m.?
272
00:15:51,576 --> 00:15:54,162
Twenty-six-year-old blood says it is.
273
00:15:54,245 --> 00:15:59,167
That pain you're feeling
is just age leaving your body.
274
00:16:00,501 --> 00:16:03,671
I said no vitamins,
you scarecrow vampire!
275
00:16:03,754 --> 00:16:07,425
They're not vitamins, sensei.
They're double cheeseburgers in pill form.
276
00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:10,261
It's the only way I can keep up
with your caloric intake.
277
00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:12,305
Come on, fella.
278
00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:16,726
Open. Open.
279
00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:24,066
Stupid Frink calls me smart?
280
00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:26,402
I'll stick my hoyvin
so far up his fluhpudnik
281
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:29,071
he'll be tasting gaheivin-moyven
for weeks.
282
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:31,908
You seem upset with our mutual friend.
283
00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:34,285
I do this all the time.
Practically every week.
284
00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:38,247
You know what might make you feel better?
Making him feel worse.
285
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:39,665
After all, the Buddha teaches us,
286
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:42,793
"It's impossible to be happy
if other people are."
287
00:16:45,379 --> 00:16:48,216
Give me the design schematics
for the emoji glasses,
288
00:16:48,299 --> 00:16:50,384
and we'll both have our revenge.
289
00:16:50,468 --> 00:16:53,137
You tech moguls
really are all psychopaths,
290
00:16:53,221 --> 00:16:55,431
and I'm here for it. Let's do this.
291
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:59,602
As part of the practice of mindful eating,
before we put anything in our mouth,
292
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:03,105
we say, "Don't mind if I do."
293
00:17:04,607 --> 00:17:07,109
Modern food packaging is designed by law
294
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,946
to tell you exactly
what's going into your body.
295
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:13,824
So look for claw marks in the logo,
icicles on the lettering,
296
00:17:13,908 --> 00:17:17,286
and you can't go wrong
with lightning bolts on the wrapper.
297
00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:20,873
Lightning bolt equals sexually active
at 1,000 years old.
298
00:17:20,957 --> 00:17:22,833
Oh, come on!
299
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:27,755
Are you all so terrified of growing old
that you'll desperately cling to any guru
300
00:17:27,838 --> 00:17:30,383
who promises you
five more minutes on earth?
301
00:17:30,466 --> 00:17:32,969
But his blood was tested
by our top medical imagineer,
302
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:36,639
Dr. Incomparable Fabulous,
and it said he's 26.
303
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:42,353
Obviously the blood you tested
wasn't my dad's.
304
00:17:42,436 --> 00:17:47,400
I tried to give blood,
but none would come out, so I used Bart's.
305
00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:49,694
Ha! You hear that?
306
00:17:49,777 --> 00:17:53,823
My ten-year-old brother
is biologically 26.
307
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:58,661
Welcome to the Simpsons' lifestyle.
Prepare to die.
308
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:10,256
But also if any of you want to pay for
my college, that would be really great!
309
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:22,268
Can still outrun death.
310
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,274
Help!
311
00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:38,951
You shall not have him, vile dragon!
312
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,124
Devastating thrust!
313
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:48,544
Artful parry! Freezing spell!
314
00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:49,629
Magic doesn't work here.
315
00:18:49,712 --> 00:18:51,631
Fantasy sequence. Zip it.
316
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:03,726
John Frink leaves no companion behind,
317
00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:07,730
especially when they're… friends?
318
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:12,401
There's something I need to show you,
but you're not gonna like it.
319
00:19:12,902 --> 00:19:17,615
Well, it's my emoji glasses with
enough detail to produce an exact copy.
320
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:19,492
You-You made this, Bart?
321
00:19:19,575 --> 00:19:22,078
I was gonna give it to Peter
because I was mad at you.
322
00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:26,165
My brain chemicals
were spiking like crazy. I'm sorry.
323
00:19:26,749 --> 00:19:31,504
Bart, you produced this schematic
entirely from memory?
324
00:19:32,755 --> 00:19:33,964
Do you know what this means?
325
00:19:34,048 --> 00:19:40,346
This is conclusive, irrefutable proof
that you are smart!
326
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:46,394
My son is a science boy!
327
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,648
So you're really not mad?
328
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:51,941
Well, see for yourself.
329
00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:55,027
Three lions?
330
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,779
It's "pride," genius!
331
00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:58,781
It certainly is.
332
00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:01,200
You know, if these glasses
are so valuable,
333
00:20:01,283 --> 00:20:03,619
perhaps I'll donate them to my alma mater
334
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:09,792
in exchange for a future full scholarship
for my very, very smart assistant.
335
00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:12,461
Oh, for crying out loud!
336
00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:16,757
The Simpsons are leaving
the beautiful nation of.
337
00:20:16,841 --> 00:20:19,135
I wish I could have seen more
338
00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:23,055
of 's many historical sites
and natural wonders.
339
00:20:23,139 --> 00:20:26,267
At least I'm bringing home
a souvenir from.
340
00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:29,061
I'm just glad to get the
out of New Zealand.
341
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:32,314
What? What? I never signed the NDA.
342
00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:52,918
I send you greetings
from the Komodo dragon species.
343
00:20:53,002 --> 00:20:56,505
For millennia, we have attempted
to communicate our message of peace
344
00:20:56,589 --> 00:20:58,632
through the language of dance.
345
00:20:58,716 --> 00:21:02,803
An effort that proved futile
due to our splayed inflexible hips,
346
00:21:02,887 --> 00:21:06,932
which, unlike those of your
South American chanteuse Shakira,
347
00:21:07,016 --> 00:21:10,060
do nothing but lie.
348
00:21:10,144 --> 00:21:14,482
Now, at last, we can share with you
our poetry, our medical breakthroughs,
349
00:21:14,565 --> 00:21:18,402
and our deep understanding
of the mathematics that underlie reality.
350
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:20,279
But first, are you going to eat that boy?
351
00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:22,782
Because if you're not,
I would sure like to.
352
00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:26,202
Or we could split him,
how do you say, splitties?
353
00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:27,703
Yummy, yummy boy.