1
00:00:03,044 --> 00:00:06,715
* The Simpsons *
2
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:10,927
D'oh!
3
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:12,512
Ahh!
4
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,903
And finally,
5
00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:31,364
the bake sale to raise money
for the car wash
6
00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:35,035
has been canceled
due to confusion.
7
00:00:35,118 --> 00:00:37,037
Well, that concludes
this morning's announcements.
8
00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:40,665
I'm Seymour Skinner,
and stand by to resume learning
9
00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:43,168
in five, four, three…
10
00:00:43,251 --> 00:00:46,212
Oh! It's hard enough
to keep the kids awake
11
00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:47,296
without you, Seymour.
12
00:00:52,927 --> 00:00:54,012
Mrs. Krabappel,
13
00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:56,056
I also have
an announcement to make.
14
00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:57,140
Can't it wait
till I retire?
15
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:01,061
I want one and all
to join me in celebrating
16
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:03,271
the anniversary
of my portentous birth.
17
00:01:03,354 --> 00:01:04,340
Here you are, Nelson.
18
00:01:04,355 --> 00:01:05,857
A birthday party?
19
00:01:08,109 --> 00:01:09,319
Here you are, Nelson.
20
00:01:11,404 --> 00:01:12,655
Here you are, Nelson.
21
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,115
I said…
22
00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:17,187
All right, men.
23
00:01:17,202 --> 00:01:18,411
Get ready to blast off.
24
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:19,481
Whoo!
25
00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:20,914
We're in orbit now.
26
00:01:20,997 --> 00:01:23,083
What's that?
A call from the president?
27
00:01:23,166 --> 00:01:24,250
Hello?
28
00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:26,044
Ah, yes.
29
00:01:26,127 --> 00:01:29,130
Let me just say this
about that.
30
00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:30,298
Okay, Mr. President.
31
00:01:30,381 --> 00:01:32,092
Bart, this is boring.
32
00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:35,929
I guess we could go
to Martin's party.
33
00:01:36,012 --> 00:01:37,388
I don't know.
34
00:01:37,472 --> 00:01:38,515
If we're seen there,
it'll definitely take
35
00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,308
our social standing
down a notch.
36
00:01:40,391 --> 00:01:41,976
We're at what now?
Three?
37
00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:43,311
Three and a half.
38
00:01:43,394 --> 00:01:45,271
We get beat up,
but we get an explanation.
39
00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:49,234
Beautiful colors. Never has…
40
00:01:49,317 --> 00:01:51,152
Mayday! Mayday!
41
00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:52,529
♪♪
42
00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:02,372
Bart!
43
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:04,415
Uh, Mrs. K.
Hey, it's Saturday.
44
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:06,084
Your powers are useless
against me.
45
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:09,254
Relax. I'm just here to have
fun like everybody else.
46
00:02:09,337 --> 00:02:11,131
Don't think of me
as a teacher.
47
00:02:11,214 --> 00:02:12,340
Okay.
48
00:02:12,423 --> 00:02:14,300
So…
49
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:16,469
Mm-hmm.
50
00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:21,348
Excuse me.
51
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:31,734
Mama!
52
00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:34,487
Hey, Houdini, why don't you
saw Martin in half?
53
00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:37,157
Oh, I'm not the kind of magician
who does tricks.
54
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,533
I'm a math-e-magician.
55
00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:41,077
Oh, man.
56
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,288
Now, prepare to marvel
at the mysteries of the universe
57
00:02:43,371 --> 00:02:46,416
as I make this remainder
disappear.
58
00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:51,713
But seven goes
into 28 four times.
59
00:02:51,796 --> 00:02:54,465
Uh… this is a magic seven!
60
00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:02,849
Edna!
61
00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:04,267
Seymour.
62
00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:05,351
Mind if I sit down?
63
00:03:05,435 --> 00:03:06,769
Hmph! It's a free country.
64
00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:08,313
I…
I don't follow you.
65
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:10,190
Oh, just sit down,
Seymour.
66
00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:13,943
It might be nice to talk
to a grownup for a change.
67
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:16,821
Well, this party is certainly
a break in my routine.
68
00:03:16,905 --> 00:03:18,948
You know, normally
I spend my Saturdays
69
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,242
carefully laying out my clothes
for the following week.
70
00:03:21,326 --> 00:03:24,871
Then I stroll down to the car wash
to see if Gus is there.
71
00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:26,789
Oh, yeah. You've got
to keep busy.
72
00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:29,542
I collect matchbooks
from glamorous nightclubs.
73
00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:31,002
It's amazing.
74
00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:33,713
It you just write to them
and ask them nicely…
75
00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:37,383
Is this…
76
00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:39,010
How you imagined
your life, Edna?
77
00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:42,555
Well, yes, but then,
I was a very depressed child.
78
00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,432
To poor decisions.
79
00:03:44,515 --> 00:03:46,267
Hear, hear.
80
00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:48,394
Seymour! I told you
81
00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:50,230
not to play
in the neighbor's yard.
82
00:03:50,313 --> 00:03:51,313
It's a party,
Mother.
83
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,066
I was invited.
84
00:03:53,149 --> 00:03:54,442
Well…
85
00:03:54,525 --> 00:03:56,945
Then I must've been
invited, too.
86
00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,821
Help me, Edna.
87
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:04,661
I know where we can hole up
for a while.
88
00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:12,460
That's it.
Looking good.
89
00:04:12,543 --> 00:04:13,836
Getting warm.
90
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:17,298
Uh… I feel queasy.
91
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,368
Don't stop, Milhouse.
92
00:04:18,383 --> 00:04:19,634
You're so close.
93
00:04:19,717 --> 00:04:20,969
I got to barf.
94
00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,430
Where's the bathroom?
95
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:32,438
Oh, my tummy!
96
00:04:32,522 --> 00:04:35,400
I told you we should've served
cake instead of oysters.
97
00:04:35,483 --> 00:04:37,277
I'm ruined!
98
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,153
Ha-ha!
99
00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:49,872
Bart, how come
you're not sick?
100
00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:51,874
Eh! I gave my oysters
to the cat.
101
00:04:54,335 --> 00:04:55,336
Hey, why'd you eat them?
102
00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:56,587
I thought
you were a vegetarian.
103
00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:58,756
I didn't. I just
wanted to leave.
104
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:03,052
More tea, Edna?
105
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:05,346
What kind of little boy
has a tea set?
106
00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:08,224
Hmm! I think we both
know the answer to that.
107
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:09,642
A lucky boy.
108
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:11,936
You know, Seymour,
109
00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:14,897
there's an innocence about you
that can be quite charming.
110
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:18,943
Oh! Well, I've always admired
your tart honesty
111
00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:22,071
and ability to be personally offended
by broad social trends.
112
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,489
Oh, really?
113
00:05:23,573 --> 00:05:24,949
Mm-hmm. Very much.
114
00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:26,117
And your laugh.
115
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:27,744
You mean, "Ha"?
116
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:30,538
Mm-hmm. That's the one
that makes me feel…
117
00:05:32,498 --> 00:05:34,792
Oh, boy.
118
00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:36,794
You have a breath mint
I could borrow?
119
00:05:36,878 --> 00:05:38,796
I've got
some menthol cigarettes.
120
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:40,715
Oh, the heck with it.
121
00:05:58,524 --> 00:06:01,110
You are never going to guess
what I saw at Martin's party
122
00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:03,071
after you guys left.
123
00:06:03,154 --> 00:06:04,155
You know that playhouse?
Well, I…
124
00:06:04,238 --> 00:06:05,573
- Good gravy!
- Oh, thank you.
125
00:06:05,656 --> 00:06:08,076
It's just brown and water.
126
00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:09,952
So I looked in the window
and there it was.
127
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:12,205
The grossest sight
I have ever…
128
00:06:12,288 --> 00:06:14,165
Bart Simpson, report to
129
00:06:14,248 --> 00:06:15,248
the principal's office
immediately.
130
00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:17,877
Now, Bart… son…
131
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:19,796
I don't know
what you think you saw
132
00:06:19,879 --> 00:06:21,839
but, let me assure you…
133
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:23,383
What Seymour… Oh…
134
00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:25,093
What Principal Skinner
means to say, Bart,
135
00:06:25,176 --> 00:06:26,969
is that sometimes
a little boy's imagination
136
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:28,054
can run away with him.
137
00:06:28,137 --> 00:06:30,223
That's the best
you can do?
138
00:06:30,306 --> 00:06:32,350
You could have at least said
you were giving her C.P.R.
139
00:06:32,433 --> 00:06:33,768
or rehearsing a play.
140
00:06:33,851 --> 00:06:36,396
Is it too late
to say that?
141
00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:37,479
Mm-hmm.
142
00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:39,982
We're just a little concerned.
143
00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:41,317
If people were to find out
144
00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:42,735
the principal
was dating a teacher,
145
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:45,071
they might see it as
a conflict of interest.
146
00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:47,824
And…
There are those
147
00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,534
who might try to use it
against us
148
00:06:49,617 --> 00:06:50,603
for their own advantage.
149
00:06:50,618 --> 00:06:51,604
Like me, for one.
150
00:06:51,619 --> 00:06:54,580
Like you, for…
151
00:06:54,664 --> 00:06:57,667
Bart, if life has taught me
one lesson repeatedly,
152
00:06:57,750 --> 00:06:59,419
it's to know
when I'm beaten.
153
00:06:59,502 --> 00:07:00,711
Let's talk deal.
154
00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:14,350
As you know, Bart,
155
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,269
your permanent record
will one day disqualify you
156
00:07:16,352 --> 00:07:18,354
from all but the hottest
and noisiest jobs.
157
00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:19,689
What do you say, son?
158
00:07:19,772 --> 00:07:21,274
You keep our secret,
159
00:07:21,357 --> 00:07:22,900
and some other student
can inherit your gloomy
160
00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:23,984
windblown future.
161
00:07:25,486 --> 00:07:26,487
Deal.
162
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:31,784
This is a great day
for forbidden love.
163
00:07:36,747 --> 00:07:38,791
Mmm. This dessert
is exquisite.
164
00:07:38,875 --> 00:07:39,861
What do you call it?
165
00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:40,877
Applesauce.
166
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:43,671
Oh, of course.
167
00:07:43,754 --> 00:07:46,340
I'm sorry. I don't get out
to restaurants much.
168
00:07:46,424 --> 00:07:48,718
That's okay.
I don't entertain much.
169
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:52,138
Usually it's just soup
for one, salad for one,
170
00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:53,514
wine for three.
171
00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,183
You know,
I always thought
172
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:57,643
I'd fall for a woman
just like Mother…
173
00:07:57,727 --> 00:07:59,270
even though
I didn't want to.
174
00:07:59,353 --> 00:08:01,606
And now that I haven't,
175
00:08:01,689 --> 00:08:04,233
I've discovered what
true happiness can be, Edna.
176
00:08:06,527 --> 00:08:09,113
Seymour, swallow
that applesauce
177
00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,781
and kiss me.
178
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:13,201
I'm afraid I already swallowed
it while you were talking.
179
00:08:16,287 --> 00:08:17,413
Mmm…
180
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:19,665
Mmm…
181
00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:24,962
Good morning, students.
Way to go there, Wendell.
182
00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:27,632
There's Ralph…
He knows the score.
183
00:08:27,715 --> 00:08:29,634
Jimbo,
how's that hat today?
184
00:08:29,717 --> 00:08:31,844
Janie, Janie, bo-phaney!
185
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:34,972
The only way to survive
a deadly blaze is…
186
00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:37,433
Oh, heck, life's too short
for fire safety.
187
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,060
Let's go outside
and pick wild flowers.
188
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:43,981
Bart Simpson to
the principal's office.
189
00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:45,608
Post haste.
190
00:08:51,739 --> 00:08:53,991
Bart, so good to see you.
191
00:08:54,075 --> 00:08:55,368
I have a little favor
to ask you.
192
00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:56,494
I'd like you
to give this note
193
00:08:56,577 --> 00:08:57,703
to Edna when you
get back to class.
194
00:08:57,787 --> 00:09:00,039
I don't think
I have to tell you
195
00:09:00,122 --> 00:09:01,499
it's for her eyes only.
196
00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:11,676
"Dear Edna"…
197
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:14,220
I hear reading.
198
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:36,409
Do you think
anyone saw us?
199
00:09:36,492 --> 00:09:39,287
No. It went
just as we planned.
200
00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:41,455
Except they confiscated
my thermos of cola at the door.
201
00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:43,124
Ohh…
202
00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:45,835
Skinner, Krabappel,
what are you two doing here?
203
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:46,919
Superintendent Chalmers!
204
00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:48,296
Uh, why, we're…
205
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:50,381
We're, uh, on a, uh…
206
00:09:50,464 --> 00:09:53,134
- a… what do you call… field trip.
- Uh, with a student.
207
00:09:53,217 --> 00:09:55,553
- Yes! He's, uh…
- He's purchasing refreshments
208
00:09:55,636 --> 00:09:57,930
- in the lobby.
- I'll go get him right now.
209
00:09:58,014 --> 00:09:59,515
Car keys, car keys, car keys.
210
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,319
Stop pushing me.
What's going on?
211
00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:13,112
Just enjoy the movie.
It has Tom Berenger.
212
00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:21,746
You think they actually
filmed this in Atlanta?
213
00:10:21,829 --> 00:10:23,456
I don't know.
214
00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:24,915
I don't think
it's important.
215
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,042
Yeah.
216
00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:34,425
Mother doesn't approve
of me dating,
217
00:10:34,508 --> 00:10:36,886
so I need you to keep
her busy for a few hours
218
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:38,638
while Edna and I sneak out.
219
00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:43,934
Oh, I can't take
much more of this.
220
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,811
I collect
pictures of cakes
221
00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:47,855
that I clip out
of the magazines.
222
00:10:47,938 --> 00:10:49,940
It all started in 1941
223
00:10:50,024 --> 00:10:53,653
when Good Housekeeping featured
a photo of a lovely cake.
224
00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:56,656
You wouldn't happen to have any
real cakes around here, would you?
225
00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,283
Oh, my no.
I don't care for cake. Too sweet.
226
00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:02,870
Now, this is called
a Lady Baltimore cake.
227
00:11:02,953 --> 00:11:04,914
At my age, I don't have
much saliva left
228
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:06,374
so you'll have
to lick my thumb
229
00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:08,542
before
I can turn the page.
230
00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:10,169
Oh, can't I just turn
the page for you?
231
00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:11,504
No!
232
00:11:11,587 --> 00:11:13,381
But you can pick out
any picture
233
00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:15,383
you want to take home
with you.
234
00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:17,093
Okay.
That one.
235
00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:18,162
- No!
- Ow!
236
00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:19,387
You can't have that one!
237
00:11:19,470 --> 00:11:20,971
That's a coconut cake!
238
00:11:24,016 --> 00:11:26,310
Bart Simpson!
239
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:29,397
How many times do I have
to tell you no talking!
240
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:30,981
Report
to the principal's office!
241
00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:32,441
But-but I wasn't…
242
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,276
And here, take this with you.
243
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:37,488
Mrs. Krabappel,
Bart has something
244
00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:38,571
he wants to say to you.
245
00:11:38,614 --> 00:11:39,824
- I won't say it!
- Bart!
246
00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:42,201
Oh…
247
00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:46,580
I love you,
Edna Krabappel.
248
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:50,876
Bart's going to marry the teacher.
249
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,045
Where are you
registered, Simpson?
250
00:11:54,672 --> 00:11:55,658
Thank you, Bart.
251
00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:56,659
That was very sweet.
252
00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:58,843
You may sit down now.
253
00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:00,678
They're not going
to get away with this.
254
00:12:00,761 --> 00:12:03,556
I'm going to step out
for a few minutes, class.
255
00:12:03,639 --> 00:12:04,639
Martin,
you're in charge.
256
00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:07,518
Now, Bart, uh…
257
00:12:08,936 --> 00:12:11,355
You must promise not
to fall in love with me.
258
00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:15,693
Now, Martin's scoring
off me.
259
00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:17,069
Oh, that is it.
260
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:18,571
Listen up, everybody!
261
00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:20,030
Follow me!
262
00:12:23,325 --> 00:12:24,577
What's going on, huh?
263
00:12:24,660 --> 00:12:26,620
What's happening,
Simpson?
264
00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:27,747
Where are we going,
anyway?
265
00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:30,458
Okay, crew…
266
00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:32,585
Set your faces to stunned.
267
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:43,429
Um…
268
00:12:43,512 --> 00:12:45,389
Um…
269
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:46,473
School dismissed.
270
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,227
And then Bart
opened the door
271
00:12:50,311 --> 00:12:51,979
and Principal Skinner
and Mrs. Krabappel
272
00:12:52,062 --> 00:12:53,355
were kissing!
273
00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:54,982
And swearing.
274
00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:56,776
Father, Uncle Apu,
275
00:12:56,859 --> 00:12:58,986
a teacher was in the closet
with the principal
276
00:12:59,069 --> 00:13:01,071
and he had as many arms
as Vishnu
277
00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:02,907
and they were
all very busy.
278
00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:04,658
Wow.
279
00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,827
I was in the library,
at the time,
280
00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:08,412
but Janie told me
that Principal Skinner
281
00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:09,872
and Bart's teacher, Mrs…
282
00:13:09,955 --> 00:13:10,941
What's her name?
283
00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:11,942
Krabappel?
284
00:13:11,957 --> 00:13:13,292
Yeah, Krabappel.
285
00:13:13,375 --> 00:13:14,919
They were naked
in the closet together.
286
00:13:15,002 --> 00:13:16,712
Oh, my goodness!
287
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:18,172
Wait a minute.
288
00:13:18,255 --> 00:13:20,382
Bart's teacher
is named "Krabappel"?
289
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,635
I've been calling her
"Crandall."
290
00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:25,054
Why didn't someone tell me?
291
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:28,265
Oh, I've been making
an idiot out of myself!
292
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,559
Mrs. Krabappel
and Principal Skinner
293
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:32,269
were in the closet
making babies,
294
00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:33,938
and I saw one of the babies,
295
00:13:34,021 --> 00:13:36,315
and the baby looked at me.
296
00:13:36,398 --> 00:13:38,067
Baby looked at you?
297
00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:40,611
Sara, get me
Superintendent Chalmers.
298
00:13:42,530 --> 00:13:44,281
- Thank you, Sara.
- Hmm.
299
00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:48,494
- Skinner!
- Uh, Superintendent Chalmers.
300
00:13:48,577 --> 00:13:51,539
The whole town's in an uproar
about your sleazy shenanigans.
301
00:13:51,622 --> 00:13:53,207
Now, I'm going to
give you a choice.
302
00:13:53,290 --> 00:13:57,086
You can give up this tawdry
fulfilling relationship
303
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:58,963
or you two will be
out of here so fast
304
00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:00,172
your mortarboards
will spin.
305
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:02,550
And where is
your mortarboard anyway?
306
00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:03,926
Uh… Right here, sir.
307
00:14:05,135 --> 00:14:07,346
So, what'll it be, Seymour?
308
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,682
Well…
309
00:14:09,765 --> 00:14:13,310
I'm sorry, but, uh, I can't
give up the woman I love.
310
00:14:13,394 --> 00:14:16,522
Well, then I'm afraid
you leave me no choice.
311
00:14:16,605 --> 00:14:18,858
I want you out
of the building by 3:00.
312
00:14:18,941 --> 00:14:22,236
You're fired. Edna, too.
313
00:14:25,197 --> 00:14:28,492
Well, it's going to be hard
to say good-bye to all of you.
314
00:14:28,576 --> 00:14:30,327
We've had a lot
of fun together.
315
00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:35,708
Nelson, Nelson, Nelson.
316
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,585
How many kids
have you beaten up this year?
317
00:14:37,668 --> 00:14:38,919
I don't know… 50.
318
00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:41,755
Ah, 50.
319
00:14:41,839 --> 00:14:44,049
Where does the time go?
320
00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:49,430
You, uh, you wanted to see me,
Principal Skinner?
321
00:14:49,513 --> 00:14:51,765
Mm-mm.
It's Mr. Skinner now.
322
00:14:51,849 --> 00:14:53,392
I'm just a man.
323
00:14:53,475 --> 00:14:56,312
Bart, I want to apologize
for the awkward position
324
00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:57,938
Edna and I put you in.
325
00:14:58,022 --> 00:15:00,608
Your… Your help made
our love possible.
326
00:15:00,691 --> 00:15:02,026
I don't know
what we'll do without you.
327
00:15:03,652 --> 00:15:05,195
Well, so long.
328
00:15:08,657 --> 00:15:09,825
Wait a second!
329
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,160
You don't have to leave
just because
330
00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:13,203
Superintendent Chalmers
told you to.
331
00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:14,273
What are you getting at?
332
00:15:14,288 --> 00:15:15,497
You spent your whole life
333
00:15:15,581 --> 00:15:17,333
following orders…
from your mother
334
00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:19,627
the army,
Superintendent Chalmers…
335
00:15:19,710 --> 00:15:23,047
Just this once, man,
stand up for yourself.
336
00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:24,131
Okay, Bart.
337
00:15:24,214 --> 00:15:25,200
Let's go, Seymour.
338
00:15:25,215 --> 00:15:26,884
Okay, Edna.
339
00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:29,261
Uh… No, wait!
340
00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:31,013
We're not going anywhere.
341
00:15:31,096 --> 00:15:33,390
I'm going to do what Bart
should have told me to do
342
00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:34,975
a long time ago.
343
00:15:38,687 --> 00:15:40,064
Attention, Springfield.
344
00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:42,608
We have barricaded ourselves
in the school
345
00:15:42,691 --> 00:15:46,028
and are not coming down
until our demands are met.
346
00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:48,614
Willie hears you.
Willie don't care.
347
00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,408
Obviously, you two
have no experience
348
00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:52,743
causing a scene.
349
00:15:57,665 --> 00:15:59,041
I'll be right there.
350
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:00,292
All right people,
351
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,669
we've got
an escaped octopus
352
00:16:01,752 --> 00:16:02,738
on the roof
of Springfield Elementary.
353
00:16:02,753 --> 00:16:03,739
Let's roll.
354
00:16:03,754 --> 00:16:04,754
Two cameras.
355
00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:09,301
So, once again,
I've been had.
356
00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:11,512
But an even more
interesting story
357
00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:14,264
has developed high atop
this two-story school:
358
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:15,724
A love story.
359
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,768
Skinner,
get off of my school.
360
00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:20,688
No.
You get off of my school.
361
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:22,606
Homer,
Bart's up there!
362
00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,274
Give me that!
363
00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:26,944
Bart,
this is your father!
364
00:16:27,027 --> 00:16:30,698
Do you know
where the remote is?
365
00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:32,616
I looked
all over the house.
366
00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:34,910
Did you check
your pocket?
367
00:16:36,286 --> 00:16:37,413
It was…
368
00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:38,497
It was in my pocket.
369
00:16:46,046 --> 00:16:48,007
Fine.
Stay in the school.
370
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:49,842
We don't want you
to come out.
371
00:16:49,925 --> 00:16:50,925
You got it.
372
00:16:50,968 --> 00:16:52,553
Damn.
All right, boys,
373
00:16:52,636 --> 00:16:53,971
roll up the sound truck.
374
00:16:54,054 --> 00:16:55,764
We'll blast them out
with music.
375
00:17:12,406 --> 00:17:14,533
* Embrace me, my sweet… *
376
00:17:14,616 --> 00:17:17,786
Oh, Edna, I hope
this siege never ends.
377
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:20,414
Seymour, you're heaven
in hush puppies.
378
00:17:20,497 --> 00:17:21,665
Oh…
379
00:17:21,749 --> 00:17:23,667
Turn the music off!
380
00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:26,336
Ha! It's working
like a charm, boys.
381
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:27,755
Now cut the power
and hit them with the lights.
382
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:34,136
* …Irreplaceable you *
383
00:17:35,971 --> 00:17:39,266
* Just one look at you *
384
00:17:39,349 --> 00:17:42,311
* My heart grew tipsy… *
385
00:17:42,394 --> 00:17:43,520
Ugh!
386
00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:52,988
I'll get it.
387
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:56,116
- Talk to me.
- You have got to end this thing, Seymour.
388
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,952
We're not coming down
until our jobs are reinstated
389
00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:01,080
and you acknowledge
and celebrate our love.
390
00:18:01,163 --> 00:18:03,624
No one would like to celebrate
your love more than I
391
00:18:03,707 --> 00:18:05,292
but I'm a public servant
392
00:18:05,375 --> 00:18:07,795
and not permitted to use
my own judgment in any way.
393
00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:10,130
Then let us take our case
directly to the towns people.
394
00:18:10,214 --> 00:18:12,174
Oh, yeah, that'll be
real productive.
395
00:18:12,257 --> 00:18:13,342
Who do you want
to talk to first?
396
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:15,010
The guy in the bumblebee suit
397
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,345
or the one with the bone
through his hair?
398
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:18,388
My opinions
are as valid
399
00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:19,765
as the next man's!
400
00:18:19,848 --> 00:18:21,975
Yeah, all right.
Just come on down.
401
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:24,186
Well… This is it.
402
00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:25,395
What are you going to do?
403
00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:26,980
I'm going to go out there
404
00:18:27,064 --> 00:18:28,941
and tell every man,
woman and child
405
00:18:29,024 --> 00:18:30,901
that I love
Edna krabappel.
406
00:18:30,984 --> 00:18:32,361
Well, that's nice,
407
00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:33,444
but first you got to grab
their attention.
408
00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:35,280
And I think I know how.
409
00:18:37,324 --> 00:18:40,202
I have a bomb.
410
00:18:43,205 --> 00:18:44,248
Hey, wait a minute.
411
00:18:44,331 --> 00:18:46,208
Those are hot dogs.
412
00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:47,626
Armour hot dogs.
413
00:18:47,709 --> 00:18:50,754
What kind of man wears
Armour hot dogs?
414
00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:52,214
It was a good idea, Bart,
415
00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:54,383
but it's just not working.
416
00:18:54,466 --> 00:18:56,885
Just speak
from the heart, Seymour.
417
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:59,054
Tell them how we brought
a little happiness
418
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:00,681
into each other's lives.
419
00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:03,851
Ask them why they're forcing
two dedicated people
420
00:19:03,934 --> 00:19:06,311
to choose between their
careers and their hearts.
421
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:07,980
Excuse me, Edna.
422
00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:10,899
I don't think we're talking
about love here.
423
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:13,110
We're talking about s-e-x
424
00:19:13,193 --> 00:19:16,196
in front
of the c-h-i-l-d-r-e-n.
425
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:17,406
Sex Cauldron?
426
00:19:17,489 --> 00:19:19,199
I thought they closed
that place down.
427
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:21,201
What are you people
talking about?
428
00:19:21,285 --> 00:19:23,412
My child told me
you two were having sex
429
00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:24,830
in the school janitor's
closet.
430
00:19:24,913 --> 00:19:26,915
You know, "Making babies"?
431
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,458
Yes, illicit sex.
432
00:19:28,542 --> 00:19:30,252
Doing it! It! It!
433
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,421
Sordid public sexual
congress!
434
00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:34,089
This is absurd.
435
00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:36,341
I did not have relations
in that closet,
436
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:38,427
and the fact is,
I haven't…
437
00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:40,304
Uh…
438
00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:45,642
Yes?
439
00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:47,603
Seymour, I think
you'd better tell them.
440
00:19:47,686 --> 00:19:50,314
It's the only way
to clear our names.
441
00:19:54,526 --> 00:19:56,486
Well, everyone,
the fact is
442
00:19:56,570 --> 00:20:00,324
I haven't ever
had relations.
443
00:20:00,407 --> 00:20:01,407
I am a virgin.
444
00:20:04,411 --> 00:20:05,495
Ha-ha!
445
00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:11,460
Hey, does this mean
446
00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:13,337
that Mrs. Krabappel
is a virgin, too?
447
00:20:13,420 --> 00:20:14,546
Ha!
448
00:20:14,630 --> 00:20:16,340
Well, Seymour,
it's clear
449
00:20:16,423 --> 00:20:18,050
you've been falsely accused
450
00:20:18,133 --> 00:20:22,346
because no one…
anywhere… ever…
451
00:20:22,429 --> 00:20:25,515
Would pretend to be
a 44-year-old virgin.
452
00:20:25,599 --> 00:20:26,934
Oh, that's for sure.
453
00:20:27,017 --> 00:20:29,645
I'm, I'm inclined to agree.
454
00:20:29,728 --> 00:20:32,314
Ugh! I'll never look
at him the same again.
455
00:20:32,397 --> 00:20:34,149
That was more than
I wanted to know.
456
00:20:35,567 --> 00:20:37,527
Okay, well, um,
Edna, Seymour,
457
00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:41,073
in light of these, uh…
uh… revelations
458
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:43,700
I, uh, suppose we,
uh… overreacted.
459
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,160
Do we have our jobs back?
460
00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:47,371
What?
Oh, yes, yes, yes. Sure.
461
00:20:47,454 --> 00:20:49,748
Just, uh, you know,
keep the lewdness to a minimum.
462
00:20:57,464 --> 00:20:58,674
I'm out of here.
463
00:20:58,757 --> 00:21:00,801
Skinny, Krabby,
catch you later.
464
00:21:00,884 --> 00:21:02,344
Uh, hold on, Bart.
465
00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:04,221
May we have
a word with you?
466
00:21:04,304 --> 00:21:05,472
We want to thank you
for helping us
467
00:21:05,555 --> 00:21:06,556
through
a difficult period.
468
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,141
Oh, no problemo.
469
00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:09,351
So, I guess now
you'll be getting married
470
00:21:09,434 --> 00:21:11,228
or something, huh?
471
00:21:11,311 --> 00:21:14,356
Well, actually, Seymour and I
have decided to break up.
472
00:21:14,439 --> 00:21:15,649
Huh?
473
00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:17,317
We can't continue on like this,
474
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:19,319
trying to build a private
relationship in public…
475
00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:21,280
The whole town
watching our every move
476
00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:22,656
with a fine-tooth comb.
477
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:24,408
Mm-hmm. I'm used
to humiliation
478
00:21:24,491 --> 00:21:26,201
but not in front
of a crowd that size.
479
00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:28,412
But you seemed
like such a good couple.
480
00:21:28,495 --> 00:21:31,456
Bart, when you get
a little older
481
00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:33,417
you're going to learn
that, sometimes, romances
482
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:35,919
don't turn out exactly
the way you'd like them to.
483
00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:41,758
That's why I love
elementary school, Edna:
484
00:21:41,842 --> 00:21:44,219
The children believe
anything you tell them.
485
00:21:51,601 --> 00:21:53,145
Whoo! Oh, Seymour…
486
00:21:59,276 --> 00:22:01,361
♪♪
487
00:22:43,820 --> 00:22:47,032
CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.