1
00:00:02,695 --> 00:00:05,557
We tend to dream
for things to be different.
2
00:00:09,219 --> 00:00:11,987
Longing for the life
we wish we had
3
00:00:12,055 --> 00:00:13,765
instead of the one
we're stuck with.
4
00:00:14,724 --> 00:00:16,158
Holy Christ.
5
00:00:16,226 --> 00:00:18,060
Did you feed
the manbirds?
6
00:00:18,128 --> 00:00:20,923
You crazy bitch.
7
00:00:23,488 --> 00:00:25,927
Suck my balls!
8
00:00:26,136 --> 00:00:27,703
Suck my balls!
9
00:00:27,771 --> 00:00:29,038
- Breasts!
- Queef!
10
00:00:29,105 --> 00:00:30,694
- Tit!
- Fart!
11
00:00:30,745 --> 00:00:32,420
Run for it!
12
00:00:32,742 --> 00:00:34,510
Suck my balls!
13
00:00:34,578 --> 00:00:36,178
Breasts!
14
00:00:36,246 --> 00:00:37,947
I personally think
15
00:00:38,014 --> 00:00:39,857
it's better to focus
on what's in front of you.
16
00:00:39,938 --> 00:00:42,017
Jeremy?
17
00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:43,385
You're on your own!
18
00:00:43,453 --> 00:00:44,687
Oh, my God, no!
19
00:00:44,754 --> 00:00:47,168
Oh, I hate him
during manbird season.
20
00:00:47,203 --> 00:00:48,093
Ooh!
21
00:00:49,719 --> 00:00:51,169
Balls!
22
00:00:54,003 --> 00:00:55,168
Sorry I'm late.
23
00:00:55,236 --> 00:00:56,903
Where is everyone going?
24
00:00:56,971 --> 00:00:59,539
And why are you dressed
like the Village People?
25
00:00:59,607 --> 00:01:03,243
Twayne is shutting down
the D.O.I. for, uh...
26
00:01:03,311 --> 00:01:04,511
What reason now?
27
00:01:04,579 --> 00:01:05,688
Renovations.
28
00:01:05,750 --> 00:01:08,482
Which should not be arousing
any suspicion whatsoever.
29
00:01:08,549 --> 00:01:10,484
I'm headed to the Catskills
for three days
30
00:01:10,551 --> 00:01:13,520
at the world-renowned
Demon Works Spa and Retreat.
31
00:01:13,588 --> 00:01:15,155
I'm going to get some R&R
32
00:01:15,223 --> 00:01:18,358
by putting myself into
a state of suspended animation.
33
00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:20,027
Bink.
34
00:01:20,094 --> 00:01:22,662
I'm going manbird hunting
upstate.
35
00:01:23,275 --> 00:01:24,664
Suck my balls!
36
00:01:24,732 --> 00:01:26,166
Suck my balls!
37
00:01:26,234 --> 00:01:27,868
I'd be able to hunt them
in the city
38
00:01:27,935 --> 00:01:30,070
if Manhattan wasn't full
of bleeding heart turd lovers.
39
00:01:30,138 --> 00:01:31,684
- Like you.
- Whoa!
40
00:01:31,806 --> 00:01:35,154
Twayne, this was really
quite generous of you.
41
00:01:35,189 --> 00:01:38,278
Just my way of saying
you're indispensable.
42
00:01:38,346 --> 00:01:39,579
Now, everybody
hit the bricks.
43
00:01:39,647 --> 00:01:40,881
Don't get handsy.
44
00:01:40,948 --> 00:01:43,183
Touch me again,
and I'll kill you.
45
00:01:43,251 --> 00:01:44,785
Oh, no.
46
00:01:44,852 --> 00:01:46,319
Leave it.
47
00:01:47,789 --> 00:01:49,791
Since the building
is being vacated,
48
00:01:49,826 --> 00:01:51,709
I thought we might try
a field trip
49
00:01:51,744 --> 00:01:53,293
to the Museum
of Natural History,
50
00:01:53,361 --> 00:01:55,045
check out
the manbird exhibit.
51
00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:56,312
What say, gang?
52
00:01:56,380 --> 00:01:58,114
Technically,
he can have us deported.
53
00:01:58,181 --> 00:01:59,749
- Sure.
- Sounds like fun.
54
00:01:59,816 --> 00:02:01,450
Let's to do this.
55
00:02:01,518 --> 00:02:03,653
I know you don't like
wearing the leash, Doug.
56
00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:05,855
I certainly don't like
holding the leash.
57
00:02:05,922 --> 00:02:09,014
So how about a promise
to stay with the group?
58
00:02:09,049 --> 00:02:09,692
Mmm.
59
00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:11,127
They're all gone.
60
00:02:11,194 --> 00:02:14,163
Phase one complete.
61
00:02:16,633 --> 00:02:17,730
Manbirds originate
62
00:02:17,830 --> 00:02:19,935
from a landmass
in the South Pacific,
63
00:02:20,003 --> 00:02:22,593
which the locals call
Scrot-Cheese island.
64
00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:25,963
It was there,
during the spring of 1967,
65
00:02:26,035 --> 00:02:28,874
that honeymooning
New York cabbie Vic Caminetti
66
00:02:28,943 --> 00:02:30,991
decided to bring
two of them home
67
00:02:31,052 --> 00:02:34,550
because he found them,
"hilarious as balls."
68
00:02:35,886 --> 00:02:37,119
The quickly divorced Caminetti
69
00:02:37,187 --> 00:02:39,121
outfitted them
with proper footwear
70
00:02:39,189 --> 00:02:40,776
and fed them spare change,
71
00:02:40,857 --> 00:02:41,950
permanently altering
72
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,320
their abnormally adaptable
digestive systems
73
00:02:44,380 --> 00:02:49,324
to now require a strict diet
of pennies, dimes, and nickels.
74
00:02:49,766 --> 00:02:51,334
Caminetti
also taught the birds
75
00:02:51,401 --> 00:02:53,336
their trademark
colorful expressions.
76
00:02:53,403 --> 00:02:57,073
Press the button
to hear a few.
77
00:02:57,140 --> 00:02:58,608
Suck my balls!
78
00:02:59,192 --> 00:03:01,181
Put your cheeks
into it!
79
00:03:01,216 --> 00:03:03,188
I'm gonna
bang your mouth!
80
00:03:03,223 --> 00:03:04,350
You can only wonder
what might have happened
81
00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:05,746
had the manbird
been brought over
82
00:03:05,815 --> 00:03:07,608
by somebody
more sophisticated.
83
00:03:07,725 --> 00:03:09,866
Eat my cheese!
84
00:03:09,901 --> 00:03:11,228
Give me a squirt!
85
00:03:11,296 --> 00:03:13,687
Okay, that's enough.
You're gonna break it.
86
00:03:14,142 --> 00:03:16,781
Many people mistake
the long, tubular appendage
87
00:03:16,816 --> 00:03:19,056
hanging from the crotch
for their genitalia.
88
00:03:19,091 --> 00:03:21,726
However, it is merely
a protective flap,
89
00:03:21,761 --> 00:03:23,371
known as the sheath,
90
00:03:23,406 --> 00:03:26,281
guarding their tiny,
hideous sex organs from danger,
91
00:03:26,316 --> 00:03:28,177
sunburn, and mockery.
92
00:03:28,212 --> 00:03:29,502
- Ew!
- Oh, boy.
93
00:03:29,537 --> 00:03:30,360
Heavier than it looks.
94
00:03:30,428 --> 00:03:33,405
Okay, folks, that's lunch.
Who wants a hot dog?
95
00:03:35,433 --> 00:03:38,340
Okay, everyone,
count off.
96
00:03:38,375 --> 00:03:39,136
- One.
- Two.
97
00:03:39,204 --> 00:03:41,623
- One.
- Two.
98
00:03:41,658 --> 00:03:43,373
Is one.
99
00:03:43,441 --> 00:03:45,676
Well, let me guess.
100
00:03:45,743 --> 00:03:47,144
Ooh, ooh!
101
00:03:54,219 --> 00:03:56,601
Suck my balls!
102
00:04:02,260 --> 00:04:03,694
Thwap!
103
00:04:03,761 --> 00:04:07,010
Looks like we've got
a purse snatcher.
104
00:04:07,442 --> 00:04:10,392
Boss, you can't use a shotgun
in the city.
105
00:04:10,427 --> 00:04:13,042
Well, then it looks like
the big dog's coming out.
106
00:04:14,005 --> 00:04:15,939
And by "big dog,"
I mean my.
107
00:04:16,007 --> 00:04:18,967
And by "dick,"
I mean my penis.
108
00:04:19,002 --> 00:04:20,010
Yah!
109
00:04:20,078 --> 00:04:23,013
I haven't seen old blue
in 25 years.
110
00:04:23,081 --> 00:04:25,682
And by "old blue,"
I mean.
111
00:04:30,588 --> 00:04:32,589
Ah!
112
00:04:32,657 --> 00:04:34,224
You'll rue the day
113
00:04:34,292 --> 00:04:36,337
I ever took my pants off.
114
00:04:37,712 --> 00:04:38,829
Doug?
115
00:04:41,472 --> 00:04:42,766
Grimes!
116
00:04:48,117 --> 00:04:48,810
No!
117
00:04:57,028 --> 00:05:01,326
Gobble my knob!
118
00:05:04,389 --> 00:05:05,965
Dear God, no.
119
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:07,386
What have I done?
120
00:05:07,421 --> 00:05:10,123
You killed him.
121
00:05:10,158 --> 00:05:12,464
Not him.
That's a female.
122
00:05:12,499 --> 00:05:15,131
I hadn't noticed
the slightly smaller testicles.
123
00:05:15,166 --> 00:05:16,133
Holy...
124
00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:17,868
What is that smell?
125
00:05:17,936 --> 00:05:21,404
It's like a burning skunk
dipped in diarrhea.
126
00:05:21,439 --> 00:05:24,163
She released her death spray
all over my penis
127
00:05:24,198 --> 00:05:26,169
to alert the males
in her flock.
128
00:05:27,378 --> 00:05:29,947
Suck my balls!
129
00:05:30,014 --> 00:05:32,214
Swallow my knob!
130
00:05:32,249 --> 00:05:33,250
I'm a marked man,
131
00:05:33,318 --> 00:05:36,582
until I find her mate
and kill him.
132
00:05:38,323 --> 00:05:40,390
For the love of God,
let me in!
133
00:05:40,458 --> 00:05:41,658
Sorry, boss.
134
00:05:41,726 --> 00:05:43,995
You know
we can't do that.
135
00:05:44,030 --> 00:05:45,658
You're dead to us now.
136
00:05:46,731 --> 00:05:49,599
It's 1987
all over again.
137
00:05:50,535 --> 00:05:52,002
If I didn't see that
this morning!
138
00:05:52,070 --> 00:05:54,241
- Hey, put your pants on.
- Yeah, I'm gonna be there.
139
00:05:58,576 --> 00:06:01,912
Breakfast is from
6:00 to 7:00.
140
00:06:01,980 --> 00:06:03,981
I'd get there early
if I were you.
141
00:06:04,048 --> 00:06:06,600
Let's get this over with.
142
00:06:07,752 --> 00:06:10,060
# Frere jacques #
143
00:06:10,095 --> 00:06:12,057
# Frere jacques #
144
00:06:12,092 --> 00:06:13,523
# Dormez-vous? #
145
00:06:13,591 --> 00:06:14,725
# Dormez-vous? #
146
00:06:14,792 --> 00:06:16,942
# Frere jacques #
147
00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:19,162
# Frere jacques #
148
00:06:19,230 --> 00:06:21,031
# Dormez-vous? #
149
00:06:21,099 --> 00:06:23,516
# Dormez-vous? #
150
00:06:23,551 --> 00:06:24,679
Oh, my gosh.
151
00:06:24,714 --> 00:06:26,870
This is the same sock.
152
00:06:26,938 --> 00:06:29,936
You must be the baby
of the one Grimes killed.
153
00:06:29,971 --> 00:06:30,874
Aw.
154
00:06:30,942 --> 00:06:34,452
- Ahh...
- You look like an Albert.
155
00:06:34,487 --> 00:06:36,789
Albert.
156
00:06:36,824 --> 00:06:39,850
I knew it!
100% trainable.
157
00:06:39,885 --> 00:06:40,951
Mmm.
158
00:06:41,019 --> 00:06:43,919
Can't just leave you here
to die.
159
00:06:44,489 --> 00:06:47,424
# Frere jacques #
160
00:06:47,492 --> 00:06:50,060
# Frere jacques #
161
00:06:50,128 --> 00:06:52,129
# Frere jacques #
162
00:06:52,196 --> 00:06:55,186
# Frere jacques #
163
00:06:55,221 --> 00:06:56,932
Yes!
Fantastic.
164
00:06:56,967 --> 00:06:59,198
Now we're gonna try it
in canon.
165
00:06:59,233 --> 00:07:00,404
Wait for my cue.
166
00:07:00,471 --> 00:07:02,796
- # Frere jacques #
- # Frere- #
167
00:07:02,831 --> 00:07:04,464
No, you got to wait
for my cue.
168
00:07:04,494 --> 00:07:05,928
My cue will look
like that.
169
00:07:05,999 --> 00:07:08,531
- Here it comes.
- # Frere jacques #
170
00:07:08,566 --> 00:07:09,897
Okay, no,
it's just getting worse,
171
00:07:09,967 --> 00:07:11,310
and that makes me nervous.
172
00:07:12,545 --> 00:07:14,794
# It's getting to the point #
173
00:07:14,843 --> 00:07:15,478
Yes!
174
00:07:15,513 --> 00:07:19,367
# Where I'm no fun
anymore #
175
00:07:19,428 --> 00:07:20,833
No, okay,
you're giving me Crosby,
176
00:07:20,953 --> 00:07:22,163
and I'm looking for Nash.
177
00:07:22,231 --> 00:07:23,631
This is where I am.
178
00:07:23,699 --> 00:07:25,010
And this is where
you need to be.
179
00:07:25,090 --> 00:07:27,399
Can you make that sound, please,
right now?
180
00:07:27,478 --> 00:07:29,504
# Hahh #
181
00:07:29,571 --> 00:07:31,606
There it is.
Lock it in.
182
00:07:31,674 --> 00:07:33,591
# It's getting
to the point #
183
00:07:33,661 --> 00:07:35,495
No.
What's happening?
184
00:07:35,611 --> 00:07:36,271
We had this.
185
00:07:36,342 --> 00:07:38,589
What the fuck
are you doing?
186
00:07:38,914 --> 00:07:41,365
I could easily ask you
the same question.
187
00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:43,618
This is my roof garden.
188
00:07:43,686 --> 00:07:45,687
I come up here
for tranquility.
189
00:07:45,754 --> 00:07:47,155
Not to listen
to a couple of gay-lords
190
00:07:47,223 --> 00:07:48,623
screech and piss
all over each other.
191
00:07:48,691 --> 00:07:50,291
In one short walk home,
192
00:07:50,359 --> 00:07:51,926
I have proven
that manbirds
193
00:07:51,994 --> 00:07:54,575
can have the vulgarity
trained completely out of them.
194
00:07:54,610 --> 00:07:56,414
You understand
how dangerous it is
195
00:07:56,449 --> 00:07:58,624
to separate a manbird
from its flock, right?
196
00:07:58,901 --> 00:08:01,035
He'll fly off
when his wings grow.
197
00:08:01,103 --> 00:08:03,071
He'll be gone by morning.
198
00:08:03,139 --> 00:08:05,206
I don't know where that's even
coming from at this point.
199
00:08:07,977 --> 00:08:10,244
I'm gonna
bang your mouth!
200
00:08:10,279 --> 00:08:12,180
Suck my balls!
201
00:08:14,850 --> 00:08:17,095
Without the D.O.I.
to keep them out,
202
00:08:17,153 --> 00:08:20,298
manbirds are swarming
into the city.
203
00:08:20,356 --> 00:08:23,418
I would like
to propose a toast.
204
00:08:23,492 --> 00:08:24,994
To pure evil.
205
00:08:25,161 --> 00:08:27,642
May nothing stand
in its path
206
00:08:27,763 --> 00:08:29,919
or deter it from its--
207
00:08:32,147 --> 00:08:34,944
So how long have you been
a limo driver?
208
00:08:37,373 --> 00:08:39,931
This is gonna be
a long ride.
209
00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,479
I thought you might
still be here.
210
00:08:48,951 --> 00:08:50,990
I was up all night
knitting these.
211
00:08:51,020 --> 00:08:55,563
Mulberry is a surprisingly hard
shade of purple yarn to find.
212
00:08:59,228 --> 00:09:01,963
That may be
the single most disgusting thing
213
00:09:02,031 --> 00:09:02,736
I've ever seen.
214
00:09:02,786 --> 00:09:04,655
What,
do you live up here now?
215
00:09:04,690 --> 00:09:06,201
It's called compassion.
216
00:09:06,268 --> 00:09:08,369
No, my entire stable
217
00:09:08,437 --> 00:09:10,384
took turns pissing on his head
all morning.
218
00:09:16,212 --> 00:09:18,391
What is all this?
219
00:09:18,547 --> 00:09:20,815
Cockfighting
is huge coin, dude,
220
00:09:20,883 --> 00:09:23,280
especially when you get
to the upper echelons.
221
00:09:23,319 --> 00:09:25,253
You're a manbird trainer now.
222
00:09:25,321 --> 00:09:27,188
You invited this plague
on our roof.
223
00:09:27,256 --> 00:09:28,623
I'm playing the hand
I was dealt.
224
00:09:28,691 --> 00:09:29,649
Suck my balls!
225
00:09:36,532 --> 00:09:40,170
And thank you, Twayne.
226
00:09:40,202 --> 00:09:42,737
You are welcome.
227
00:09:42,805 --> 00:09:43,474
Oh!
228
00:09:44,073 --> 00:09:45,481
Totally saw a nip.
229
00:09:45,541 --> 00:09:47,508
Choose your words
very carefully.
230
00:09:47,576 --> 00:09:49,477
What are you doing here?
231
00:09:49,545 --> 00:09:51,633
All right, fellas,
I'll catch up with you later.
232
00:09:52,581 --> 00:09:55,363
Oh, or you can stay.
Totally cool.
233
00:09:55,384 --> 00:09:58,475
I'm afraid I have
a bit of a confession to make.
234
00:09:58,554 --> 00:10:00,623
You see,
I didn't bring you up here
235
00:10:00,658 --> 00:10:01,823
for a vacation.
236
00:10:01,890 --> 00:10:04,058
Hand me my robe.
237
00:10:09,398 --> 00:10:11,466
Ay, dios mio!
238
00:10:11,915 --> 00:10:13,451
Senor grimes...
239
00:10:16,111 --> 00:10:18,539
You know what I'm here for,
Magdalena.
240
00:10:22,444 --> 00:10:25,363
I've never been so sure
of anything in my life.
241
00:10:28,951 --> 00:10:31,753
Gary had the connections
to secure the garden.
242
00:10:31,820 --> 00:10:33,688
I took care
of the manbird ordinance
243
00:10:33,756 --> 00:10:35,490
by shutting down
the D.O.I.
244
00:10:35,557 --> 00:10:36,726
But how are you planning
245
00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:40,662
on getting 100,000
paying manbirds in the garden?
246
00:10:40,729 --> 00:10:42,430
You're looking at him.
247
00:10:44,517 --> 00:10:45,033
Balls!
248
00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:46,434
Arturo,
249
00:10:46,502 --> 00:10:49,523
the greatest cockfighter
in manbird history.
250
00:10:50,239 --> 00:10:52,638
The fans eat him up
like Kennedy half-dollars.
251
00:10:52,941 --> 00:10:55,588
I really think
you may have a shot here.
252
00:10:55,644 --> 00:10:56,858
Your fighter is literally
253
00:10:56,928 --> 00:10:58,442
slapping the piss
out of that other guy.
254
00:10:58,647 --> 00:11:00,415
No, the other guy
is Arturo.
255
00:11:00,482 --> 00:11:01,365
Oh.
256
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:03,859
We can't figure out
what's wrong with him.
257
00:11:05,346 --> 00:11:08,877
Suck... my balls.
258
00:11:10,426 --> 00:11:13,696
He's distraught because his
ex wife was recently murdered.
259
00:11:13,731 --> 00:11:15,131
Suck my balls.
260
00:11:15,166 --> 00:11:18,542
She was a purse snatcher,
a disgrace.
261
00:11:18,577 --> 00:11:19,568
Suck my balls.
262
00:11:19,603 --> 00:11:22,359
But they have a son,
a son he's never met.
263
00:11:22,394 --> 00:11:24,273
- Suck... my balls.
- He says it's over.
264
00:11:24,308 --> 00:11:25,226
The fight's gone out of him.
265
00:11:25,287 --> 00:11:27,308
- Suck my balls.
- He wants vengeance.
266
00:11:27,376 --> 00:11:29,762
The cock of the man
who murdered his ex wife.
267
00:11:29,797 --> 00:11:33,073
Looks like we got ourselves
an interpreter.
268
00:11:36,719 --> 00:11:38,713
What's the password?
269
00:11:42,892 --> 00:11:44,722
It's '87 all over again!
270
00:11:51,734 --> 00:11:54,095
No sudden moves.
271
00:11:54,536 --> 00:11:56,539
They can smell
her death squirt on me,
272
00:11:56,638 --> 00:11:58,204
and it's driving them crazy.
273
00:12:10,886 --> 00:12:12,353
Yah!
274
00:12:12,421 --> 00:12:13,890
Feathered freak!
275
00:12:13,925 --> 00:12:14,683
Ugh.
276
00:12:16,925 --> 00:12:18,826
Yah!
277
00:12:18,894 --> 00:12:20,261
Whap!
278
00:12:21,897 --> 00:12:23,265
- The winner!
- Oh, easy!
279
00:12:24,566 --> 00:12:26,572
Oh, yes,
give me his socks.
280
00:12:26,607 --> 00:12:27,602
Ah.
281
00:12:27,669 --> 00:12:30,261
One of you
knows who this belongs to.
282
00:12:30,272 --> 00:12:31,839
You tell him
283
00:12:31,907 --> 00:12:34,497
that sound he hears
in his nightmares,
284
00:12:34,543 --> 00:12:38,239
it's the collector
coming for his socks!
285
00:12:41,884 --> 00:12:44,379
They really should have
made this mouth hole bigger.
286
00:12:49,425 --> 00:12:51,906
I think I badly injured
my penis.
287
00:12:51,941 --> 00:12:54,021
I need to go to a hospital now.
288
00:12:54,029 --> 00:12:55,229
Adios!
289
00:12:55,297 --> 00:12:56,497
Oh!
290
00:12:56,565 --> 00:12:58,065
Yow!
291
00:12:58,133 --> 00:12:59,967
Here's your $37.
292
00:13:03,806 --> 00:13:05,640
I don't know who would
sew a fake manbird head on
293
00:13:05,707 --> 00:13:07,475
and join
the cockfighting circuit,
294
00:13:07,543 --> 00:13:10,311
but you and me are gonna make
some serious money together.
295
00:13:10,379 --> 00:13:12,413
Randall, it's me,
Grimes.
296
00:13:14,049 --> 00:13:16,648
Get your rest.
297
00:13:17,692 --> 00:13:19,108
You call that a camel toe?
298
00:13:19,583 --> 00:13:21,317
Put your cheeks into it!
299
00:13:21,385 --> 00:13:22,851
Mr. Caminetti, hi.
300
00:13:22,931 --> 00:13:26,095
Grimes told me you might be able
to help me find Albert's father.
301
00:13:27,758 --> 00:13:28,798
Vomit, classic.
302
00:13:28,857 --> 00:13:31,857
Manbirds use
97% of their brain capacity
303
00:13:31,938 --> 00:13:34,099
within the first 48 hours
of life.
304
00:13:34,179 --> 00:13:36,599
So basically,
you ruined the butt-scab
305
00:13:36,667 --> 00:13:38,469
as soon as you taught him
to sing.
306
00:13:38,504 --> 00:13:41,636
Maybe I could teach him
to speak manbird.
307
00:13:41,839 --> 00:13:44,149
Manbird
is the most difficult
308
00:13:44,208 --> 00:13:46,615
and least popular language
on the planet.
309
00:13:46,616 --> 00:13:49,787
There's over 500 variations
of this phrase alone.
310
00:13:49,822 --> 00:13:52,923
Say it loud.
Say it proud.
311
00:13:52,958 --> 00:13:55,280
Suck my balls.
312
00:13:55,315 --> 00:13:55,944
Ah!
313
00:13:56,014 --> 00:13:58,293
You just called my father
a coward.
314
00:13:58,528 --> 00:14:00,329
Suck my... balls!
315
00:14:00,397 --> 00:14:01,944
Now you're asking
for salad.
316
00:14:01,965 --> 00:14:03,870
You'll come
eight times a week
317
00:14:03,905 --> 00:14:05,086
for the next three months,
318
00:14:05,302 --> 00:14:06,402
twice on Sundays.
319
00:14:06,536 --> 00:14:08,303
Gonna be
a lot of throat work.
320
00:14:08,338 --> 00:14:10,441
Feel the way
my larynx vibrates.
321
00:14:10,841 --> 00:14:12,337
Suck my balls!
322
00:14:12,476 --> 00:14:13,909
Suck my balls!
323
00:14:13,977 --> 00:14:15,480
Suck my balls!
324
00:14:15,541 --> 00:14:16,465
Feel that?
325
00:14:16,534 --> 00:14:18,575
Ooh, yeah,
a lot of resonance there.
326
00:14:18,626 --> 00:14:21,809
Can you just excuse me
for one quick second?
327
00:14:22,088 --> 00:14:23,475
Okay, Albert,
328
00:14:23,620 --> 00:14:26,318
there's no way I'm going
back into that man's apartment,
329
00:14:26,390 --> 00:14:29,109
so I'm going to ask you
to listen to track 35
330
00:14:29,144 --> 00:14:32,058
on my recently purchased
playlist.
331
00:14:32,748 --> 00:14:35,748
# Born free #
332
00:14:35,783 --> 00:14:39,745
# As free as the wind blows #
333
00:14:39,903 --> 00:14:41,802
Still fighting
a flatness issue
334
00:14:41,837 --> 00:14:43,016
on the breaks,
335
00:14:43,140 --> 00:14:46,158
but your phrasing
is coming along very nicely.
336
00:14:46,193 --> 00:14:48,413
# Follow your heart #
337
00:14:54,384 --> 00:14:57,753
You fly free,
little manbird.
338
00:15:00,390 --> 00:15:01,624
Oh!
339
00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:04,794
That's trouble.
340
00:15:04,861 --> 00:15:06,529
You threw him
off the roof?
341
00:15:06,596 --> 00:15:08,882
I thought you were
a social worker!
342
00:15:08,917 --> 00:15:10,032
He looked ready.
343
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:12,615
Clearly, he wasn't.
344
00:15:15,972 --> 00:15:17,673
I'm keeping
a mental journal
345
00:15:17,741 --> 00:15:20,676
to try to slow
my descent into madness.
346
00:15:20,744 --> 00:15:23,664
God knows how many manbirds
I've slaughtered.
347
00:15:23,699 --> 00:15:26,391
I'm known to them
only as the Collector
348
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:28,818
because I collect their socks,
349
00:15:28,885 --> 00:15:30,820
and, God,
do they hate me for it.
350
00:15:31,515 --> 00:15:33,743
Somewhere buried deep
in my brain
351
00:15:33,778 --> 00:15:35,370
is the name Grimes.
352
00:15:35,859 --> 00:15:38,169
But I don't even know
what that means anymore.
353
00:15:38,204 --> 00:15:41,018
I feel like I've fought
on every rooftop in Manhattan.
354
00:15:41,465 --> 00:15:44,406
Looking for the one
they call Arturo.
355
00:15:44,701 --> 00:15:47,903
It's all a blur
of taints, scrot-cheese,
356
00:15:47,971 --> 00:15:49,273
and dirty socks.
357
00:15:49,308 --> 00:15:52,485
And the same question keeps
running through my head:
358
00:15:52,776 --> 00:15:54,343
How do you scratch an itch
359
00:15:54,411 --> 00:15:56,783
when your fingers
have been sewn together?
360
00:15:57,614 --> 00:15:59,413
Is the lady of the house in?
361
00:15:59,549 --> 00:16:00,883
Mark's not here.
362
00:16:00,951 --> 00:16:02,318
Found a new bird
to play with.
363
00:16:02,385 --> 00:16:03,135
I'm here for you,
364
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:05,488
and I'm not here to play...
nice, at least.
365
00:16:05,555 --> 00:16:07,490
She gives me
a $5 foot-long.
366
00:16:07,557 --> 00:16:08,891
Hold the tomatoes.
367
00:16:08,959 --> 00:16:11,456
Boy, you really
like those sandwiches.
368
00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:13,496
We've heard
you manage the Collector.
369
00:16:14,798 --> 00:16:16,398
Yeah, that's him
over there.
370
00:16:16,466 --> 00:16:18,100
He's got a sledgehammer
for a dick,
371
00:16:18,168 --> 00:16:20,409
and manbirds pay top coin
to see him fight.
372
00:16:20,444 --> 00:16:21,370
And the cage?
373
00:16:21,438 --> 00:16:22,638
Keeps him on edge.
374
00:16:22,706 --> 00:16:23,873
And it's pretty funny.
375
00:16:26,676 --> 00:16:28,213
Bring him out, Bumbles.
376
00:16:29,379 --> 00:16:30,886
Ah, ooh!
377
00:16:31,381 --> 00:16:33,744
Suck!
My balls!
378
00:16:33,779 --> 00:16:35,451
Come and get it, Arturo.
379
00:16:35,519 --> 00:16:38,621
I use her sock
to keep my kielbasa warm.
380
00:16:41,281 --> 00:16:44,006
Anyone have a clue
what this idiot's trying to say?
381
00:16:44,041 --> 00:16:45,000
Not one word.
382
00:16:45,128 --> 00:16:48,497
Over 100,000 manbirds
are expected
383
00:16:48,565 --> 00:16:50,332
at Madison Square Garden
tomorrow night
384
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:52,168
to witness these two
moral enemies
385
00:16:52,235 --> 00:16:53,903
going at each other.
386
00:16:53,970 --> 00:16:56,153
Luckily, I will not
be there to report.
387
00:16:56,188 --> 00:16:58,307
The smell should be
excruciating.
388
00:16:58,375 --> 00:16:59,494
Mark, get in here!
389
00:16:59,563 --> 00:17:01,520
They're talking about my fight
on the news.
390
00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:03,091
I'm too busy right now.
391
00:17:03,246 --> 00:17:06,048
# It's getting
to the point #
392
00:17:06,116 --> 00:17:10,175
# where I'm no fun
anymore #
393
00:17:10,287 --> 00:17:12,655
Never thought I'd get sick
of that song.
394
00:17:14,658 --> 00:17:16,859
There goes my laundry money.
395
00:17:16,927 --> 00:17:18,379
Hey, don't get rid
of that water.
396
00:17:18,628 --> 00:17:20,094
I got to wash
my fighter's cock.
397
00:17:20,230 --> 00:17:23,557
I think Albert's peed in here,
like, a lot.
398
00:17:23,592 --> 00:17:25,562
That's okay.
It's full of ammonia.
399
00:17:25,635 --> 00:17:26,835
Oh, my God.
400
00:17:26,903 --> 00:17:28,771
Look at those socks.
401
00:17:29,656 --> 00:17:33,086
How would you like
to meet your dad?
402
00:17:35,068 --> 00:17:37,572
I'm gonna take that
as a yes...
403
00:17:37,607 --> 00:17:40,304
and an inability
to process quarters.
404
00:17:44,542 --> 00:17:47,120
Dimes, nickels, quarters.
Get your quarters here.
405
00:17:47,346 --> 00:17:48,417
Dimes, nickels.
406
00:17:49,348 --> 00:17:51,408
You're in front of me?
407
00:17:51,443 --> 00:17:53,183
Your nose
is literally bleeding.
408
00:17:53,251 --> 00:17:56,134
Yeah, Callie smacked me around
pretty good.
409
00:17:57,289 --> 00:17:58,803
Now, remember
what I told you.
410
00:17:58,838 --> 00:18:00,600
Slap and move.
411
00:18:00,635 --> 00:18:02,777
Slap and move.
412
00:18:02,861 --> 00:18:05,229
Slap and move.
413
00:18:05,297 --> 00:18:07,064
That's a champion
over there.
414
00:18:10,335 --> 00:18:14,105
Suck!
My! Balls!
415
00:18:14,172 --> 00:18:16,040
Your language
disgusts me
416
00:18:16,108 --> 00:18:18,372
and so does the odor
of your dead ex
417
00:18:18,407 --> 00:18:19,766
all over my wang.
418
00:18:19,801 --> 00:18:22,196
Did I mention how small
her balls were?
419
00:18:26,151 --> 00:18:27,318
Oh!
420
00:18:37,596 --> 00:18:39,063
Oh!
421
00:18:39,131 --> 00:18:41,232
Suck my balls!
422
00:18:41,299 --> 00:18:44,001
Balls! Balls!
Balls! Balls! Balls!
423
00:18:52,811 --> 00:18:54,345
Piss! Piss! Piss!
Piss! Piss!
424
00:18:54,413 --> 00:18:58,697
One, two, three.
425
00:18:59,050 --> 00:19:00,985
Suck my bollocks!
426
00:19:01,052 --> 00:19:02,253
What happened?
427
00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:03,988
Is Callie happy?
428
00:19:04,055 --> 00:19:06,590
Albert, I know,
I tried this before,
429
00:19:06,658 --> 00:19:08,894
but if you don't fly
right now,
430
00:19:08,927 --> 00:19:10,327
you may never
meet your father.
431
00:19:10,395 --> 00:19:11,562
Huh?
432
00:19:11,630 --> 00:19:13,426
Change is a good thing.
433
00:19:13,461 --> 00:19:16,505
Speaking of which,
I have no more change.
434
00:19:16,735 --> 00:19:19,778
So fly, if you know
what's good for you.
435
00:19:24,242 --> 00:19:28,098
Eight, nine, ten.
It's over.
436
00:19:31,116 --> 00:19:32,383
I know
we shouldn't say this,
437
00:19:32,451 --> 00:19:34,051
but he's clearly dead.
438
00:19:38,657 --> 00:19:41,657
Suck my balls?
439
00:19:41,793 --> 00:19:45,496
# Oh, Danny boy #
440
00:19:45,564 --> 00:19:50,162
# The pipes,
the pipes are calling #
441
00:19:51,540 --> 00:19:53,598
I said
I wouldn't do this.
442
00:19:53,839 --> 00:19:58,786
# And down
the mountainside #
443
00:20:01,313 --> 00:20:04,315
Suck my balls.
444
00:20:08,153 --> 00:20:09,353
Huh?
445
00:20:13,458 --> 00:20:15,481
That's gonna leave
an emotional mark.
446
00:20:15,494 --> 00:20:17,872
Is there a rear exit
out of this place?
447
00:20:17,907 --> 00:20:19,029
Mm-mm-mm.
448
00:20:19,826 --> 00:20:22,465
We like to see
the best in people...
449
00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:24,543
We're gonna
have to bulk you up.
450
00:20:24,603 --> 00:20:26,802
Is not much junk
in the front.
451
00:20:30,428 --> 00:20:32,480
Or even things
they'll never be.
452
00:20:33,078 --> 00:20:35,332
But people are
who they are,
453
00:20:35,412 --> 00:20:39,000
and it's probably smart
not to try to change them.
454
00:20:39,339 --> 00:20:41,887
- Suck my balls.
- Don't mind if I do.
455
00:20:45,381 --> 00:20:47,379
And might I say, you offered
your karma corn to me
456
00:20:47,459 --> 00:20:48,937
in perfect manbird.
457
00:20:48,999 --> 00:20:51,106
Such a subtle language, really.
458
00:20:52,882 --> 00:20:53,972
Now about that handjob...
459
00:20:54,261 --> 00:20:57,711
Sync and Edits: VeRdiKT
[Subscene.com / Addic7ed.com]